Cheese Wrestling: A Lt. Jack Daniels/Chief Cole Clayton Thriller (6 page)

“Leave me alone, you stupid skank!” he growled as he rolled over slightly, starting to open his eyes. “I don’t have any smack left. Go to hell.”

“Do you have this caliber of criminal in your town?” Jack asked Cole.

“Not sure,” Cole said. “Should we check him for cheese?”

“You said you wouldn’t mention that again.”

“Apologies. That was the last time.”

Jack holstered her weapon, and slipped a handcuff on Sergei’s wrist. Then she wrenched his other arm back to snap on the second bracelet, as he screamed in pain and protest.

“Fuck! Who the hell are you people? You want to die? You know who I am, you bitch?”

Jack sighed as she lifted her police badge off her chest and showed it to Sergei, holding it just inches over his suddenly-wide eyes.

Jack shrugged at Clayton. “This is what always happens to me whenever I meet new guys. I try to make a good first impression and they call me names and tell me there’s no more heroin. Is it me?” She looked back at Sergei and said, “It’s me, right? It must be.”

Within ten minutes, the block became a blinking sea of red and blue lights. Uniforms and detectives were scurrying around, getting names and talking to next door neighbors. Ambulance personnel were carrying the girls out one by one on stretchers, talking about which fluids they needed to start pumping into them immediately, which ones were on the brink of death from dehydration and starvation.

The streetlights were off now; probably timed to go out when the sun crested the rooftops of the buildings in the Ukrainian Village. Every porch and stoop was crowded with people, all eager to see what was happening. They’d all say the same thing. “This isn’t that sort of neighborhood” and “Things like that don’t happen around here.”

They don’t happen around anywhere, Cole thought bitterly, until you find out they do.

He scanned the sea of people until he noticed Lt. Daniels, heading for her car. He jogged to catch up.

“You just going to leave me here without saying goodbye?” he said. “I’m too wired to sleep, and was going to grab breakfast. Hungry?”

She grinned. “Don’t take this the wrong way, Cole, but right now the only thing I want to do is sleep. And I have you to thank for that.”

He nodded. “I think I understand. Sometimes sleep isn’t easy in our line of work. I’m going to go over to the hospital and call Alice’s parents. I’m looking forward to making that phone call.”

“I bet,” Jack said. She held her hand out and said, “It was good working with you, Chief.”

Clayton took her hand in his, not squeezing it as hard as the first time, but holding it a little longer and said, “You too, Lieutenant. Take care.”

He watched her get into her car, and figuring he’d never see her again, said, “I’m gonna send you something when I get home as a thank you. Keep an eye out for it.”

“Not anything cheese-based, I hope.”

“No. I was going to go with liquor. A celebratory drink is called for, I think.”

“Let me guess,” Jack said. “Something from Tennessee?”

“Tennessee? Do they make good vodka in Tennessee?”

Her eyes crinkled at the edges. “I dunno. But I’ve heard they make pretty good whiskey there.”

“Ah, I get those mixed up sometimes.” He raised his palm. “Goodbye, Jack Daniels.”

“Goodbye, Cole Clayton.” She started the car, but before pulling away she unrolled the window. “Hey, if you’re heading to the hospital, I can drop you off.”

“You sure it wouldn’t be any trouble?”

“Nah. It’s on the way home. But do me a favor.”

“Of course.”

Jack’s face became serious. “If we find ourselves surrounded by gangbangers, let’s shoot them this time.”

Cole hesitated, feeling a blush creep up his neck. “Allow me to apologize, Lieutenant. It was all I could think of at the moment. I didn’t mean for it to be awkward, or to make you uncomfortable.”

Jack’s stoic expression cracked, and she began to laugh. A deep, rich belly laugh. “Jesus, you really are Andy from Mayberry. Get your ass in the car, Cole, before I fall asleep where I’m sitting.”

Cole began to laugh as well. “I was right. They sure don’t make them like you back home, Jack.”

He took one last, long look at all the activity in the street, at all the good they’d done that night, and then got his ass into the car.

The End

ABOUT THE AUTHORS

J
oe Konrath is the author of more than twenty novels and dozens of shorter works in the mystery, thriller, horror, and science fiction genres. He’s sold over two million books worldwide, and besides Bernard Schaffer he’s collaborated with bestsellers Blake Crouch, Barry Eisler, Ann Voss Peterson, Henry Perez, Tom Schreck, Jeff Strand, Jude Hardin, Iain Rob Wright, and F. Paul Wilson. He likes beer, pinball machines, and playing pinball when drinking beer.
www.jakonrath.com

Bernard Schaffer is the author of multiple titles in a wide-variety of genres including police procedurals, modern literature, sci-fi westerns, and historical murder mysteries. In addition to writing, Schaffer is the father of two children and a lifelong resident of the Philadelphia region. He spent his youth as a child actor and is now a decorated police veteran and expert witness in narcotics distribution. He’d like to thank Joe and Maria Konrath both for this opportunity and all they’ve done for the independent publishing movement.

And for the record, he has never, ever cheese wrestled.

ALSO BY BERNARD SCHAFFER

Superbia 1

Superbia 2 (featuring Cole Clayton)

Superbia 3

Cheese Wrestling (with J.A. Konrath)

Snake Wine (with J.A. Konrath)

Guns of Seneca 6

Old-Time Lawmen

Magnificent Guns of Seneca 6

Immaculate Killers

The Girl from Tenerife

Whitechapel: The Final Stand of Sherlock Holmes

ALSO BY J.A. KONRATH

Jack Daniels Thrillers

Whiskey Sour

Bloody Mary

Rusty Nail

Dirty Martini

Fuzzy Navel

Cherry Bomb

Shaken

Stirred (with Blake Crouch)

Last Call (with Blake Crouch)

Shot of Tequila

Banana Hammock

Jack Daniels Stories (collected stories)

Serial Killers Uncut (with Blake Crouch)

Suckers (with Jeff Strand)

Planter’s Punch (with Tom Schreck)

Floaters (with Henry Perez)

Truck Stop (short)

Flee (with Ann Voss Peterson)

Spree (with Ann Voss Peterson)

Three (with Ann Voss Peterson)

Hit (with Ann Voss Peterson)

Exposed (with Ann Voss Peterson)

Naughty (with Ann Voss Peterson)

Babe on Board (short with Ann Voss Peterson)

With a Twist (short)

Street Music (short)

Jacked Up! (with Tracy Sharp)
Racked (with Jude Hardin)

Straight up (with Iain Rob Wright)

Cheese Wrestling (with Bernard Schaffer)

Snake Wine (with Bernard Schaffer)

Other Works

Symbios

Timecaster

Timecaster Supersymmetry

Wild Night is Calling (short with Ann Voss Peterson)

Shapeshifters Anonymous (short)

The Screaming (short)

Afraid (writing as Jack Kilborn)

Endurance (writing as Jack Kilborn)

Trapped (writing as Jack Kilborn)

Haunted House (writing as Jack Kilborn)

Draculas (with Blake Crouch, Jeff Strand, and F. Paul Wilson)

Origin

The List

Disturb

65 Proof (short story omnibus)

Crime Stories (collected stories)

Horror Stories (collected stories)

Dumb Jokes & Vulgar Poems

A Newbie’s Guide to Publishing

Be the Monkey (with Barry Eisler)

Grandma? (with Talon Konrath)

CHEESE WRESTLING
Copyright © 2013 by Bernard Schaffer and Joe Konrath
Cover and art copyright © 2013 by Carl Graves

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. All rights reserved. No part of this publication can be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, without permission in writing from the authors.

December 2013