Clouds (13 page)

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Authors: Robin Jones Gunn

BOOK: Clouds
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Her Jonathan had turned into a man. Shelly drew on all her strength not to topple over. He came closer, scanning the buckets of flowers as he approached. Then he stopped less than two feet away from Shelly and greeted the flower vendor with a friendly,
“Morgen.”

The sound of his voice took all the breath she had left. Shelly faced him, staring at his profile as he examined a bouquet of irises. Her lips formed the word
Jonathan
, but no sound came from inside her. She felt like a ghost that he couldn’t see.

Stretching out her quivering hand, Shelly touched her true love’s shoulder ever so slightly. Jonathan turned. The instant he saw her face, all the color drained from his. He froze.

“Shelly?” It was barely a whisper.

Her voice suddenly returned and came rushing up through her throat to her lips. In a wild exclamation, she breathed out, “Jonathan.”

Chapter Twelve
 

W
ith all the joy she had been storing up in her heart, Shelly flew into his arms, hugging him tightly. He felt solid, strong, and almost like a statue. Shelly pulled away and blinked the tears from her eyes. Jonathan was still frozen, unable to respond.

“I’m sorry,” were the first words Shelly heard herself say. “I should have called you. Meredith and I just arrived yesterday. We’re staying at Jana and Mike’s. I found out you were going to be here, and I should have called instead of shocking you like this. I’m sorry.”

“Shel?” Jonathan repeated, the color slowly returning to his face. She didn’t know if he had heard any of her explanation. Why hadn’t she remembered that Jonathan had never been one for surprises? He liked things orderly and planned out. She never should have surprised him like this. It would have been worse at the staff meeting in front of all his friends.

The woman at the flower stand called out something to
them. Shelly ignored her. Her eyes were locked onto Jonathan’s, and her heart was still pounding wildly. They stood there, each silently drinking in the sight of the other.

“Hi,” Jonathan finally said when his voice returned.

“Hi,” Shelly said with a giggle. “How are you? You look … you look great.”

“So do you,” he said.

“I’m so glad to see you,” Shelly began.

The flower vendor spoke again. This time Jonathan reluctantly turned his head to respond. His eyes were the last part of him to turn away from Shelly. He said something to the woman at the stand, and she spoke back using large hand motions.

“What’s she saying?” Shelly asked, moving closer to Jonathan.

His smile returned, and his gaze moved back to Shelly’s face. “She says she has a special today on roses for, well, for people like us.”

“She said
Liebespaar
, didn’t she? I remember that word. Isn’t it ‘sweethearts’?”

Jonathan nodded and continued to take in a full view of Shelly.

The woman heckled him once again. Whatever she said made him laugh. He suddenly wrapped his right arm around Shelly’s shoulder and drew her close.

“Meine gutten Freundin,”
Jonathan answered the woman. Then, for Shelly’s benefit she was sure, he stated, “We’re just good friends.”

She stood and, with a tease in her voice, threw a handful of long-stemmed pink and red roses at their feet.

Shelly laughed at the gesture, even though she didn’t know exactly what was going on. Jonathan released his warm grip on
her shoulder and bent to pick up the mixed bouquet of roses, speaking his confident German phrases, saying something that made the woman laugh. He then handed her some money.

“Would you like to get some coffee?” Jonathan asked as he gently took Shelly by the elbow and steered her away from the flower woman. He held the bouquet of roses and didn’t offer it to Shelly.

“Sure. I know you have your meeting at nine.”

“That’s okay. There’s so much we need to talk about.”

“You’re right,” Shelly said. “I … I …” The words wouldn’t come.

“Let’s find a place to sit down,” Jonathan suggested.

They were winding their way through the crowds, away from the church. Jonathan’s touch on her elbow felt marvelous. That was the only way she could describe it. In years past she had resented it whenever he tried to lead her or direct her. Now she welcomed his confident and tender touch.

They had just reached the end of the row of fruit stands when Jana and Meredith appeared from around the corner and spotted them.

“Jonathan!” Meredith called out with a squeal. She came running to meet him and gave him a hug. “We were going to surprise you at the staff meeting,” she said. “How did you find Shelly?”

“I … I …” Jonathan was now at a loss for words. “We just …”

“It was at the flower stand,” Shelly said, enjoying all the romantic insinuations that came with that admission. “I turned around, and there he was. Oh, and these are for you, Jana. Thanks for letting us stay at your home.”

“Thanks,” Jana said, taking the bouquet of daisies from her.

“Were you surprised?” Meredith asked Jonathan eagerly.

“Surprised?” Jonathan put his hand over his heart. In the
other hand he still held the roses. “I think I’m still in shock.”

“We’re on our way to the church,” Jana said. “Were you guys coming to get us?”

“No, we were …” Jonathan fumbled again. “I mean, it’s …” He looked at his watch.

“We were going to grab a cup of coffee,” Shelly explained.

“We have coffee and pastry waiting for us at the church,” Jana said. “Why don’t you guys come with us? If you two start to catch up on old times now, Jonathan will never make it to the staff meeting.”

“Ah …” He still seemed completely flustered.

“Mike’s already there,” Jana continued. “We should try to get there a little early. Come on. You three friends can catch up at dinner tonight.”

It seemed they had no choice but to go along. Shelly thought it might be for the best. Jonathan seemed so rattled. A couple of hours to let the shock subside might be good. The evening could then be all theirs.

Shelly had made note of a charming restaurant the day before when she and Meredith had done some browsing. If Jonathan didn’t have a suggestion for dinner, Shelly would take him there. They would sit at a small, round table once again, with their knees touching. In the glow of the candlelight she would be able to explain everything to him, and he would readily forgive her. Their love would finally be free to breathe again, and they could pick up where they had left off. Already she was wondering what it would be like to feel his lips pressed against hers. It had been so long.

They followed Jana through the crowds. Shelly wanted to reach over and take Jonathan’s hand. But she knew Jonathan. He wouldn’t want to show affection toward Shelly around Jana until it had been defined that Shelly was more than just an old neighbor.

All in good time.

They entered through the side door of the church and walked down a long hallway to a meeting room at the end. Meredith had been chattering all the way over and was now in her element, meeting new people and observing all the details of their surroundings.

Shelly was usually like that, too. However, only one detail interested her today. And she was standing next to him. It was then that she noticed he had on aftershave. Not his dad’s spicy stuff he had worn that night they first walked around the block together hand in hand. This morning Jonathan smelled like a cedar tree after the rain. He smelled like Jonathan, he looked like Jonathan, and in every way he was Jonathan. Shelly could hardly believe this was happening.

“So, are you two going to see the sights?” Jonathan asked Shelly.

“That’s the plan. As soon as I can get the little social butterfly out of here. Jana invited us to have dinner with the whole group, but if you want to meet separately or something …”

Tiny beads of perspiration broke out on Jonathan’s forehead. Shelly imagined it was from the vigorous pace they had been walking.

“Look,” he said, gently taking hold of her wrist, “we need to talk.”

“I know,” Shelly agreed. Even though they were in a room filled with staff workers, Shelly had a strong urge to place her hand on his cheek and run her thumb across his lips to silence them. She wanted him to know everything was going to be okay. But she held back, giving him only a smile.

He let go of her wrist and looked up at the ceiling. Shelly thought she saw tears. Jonathan was blinking back tears! Any love she had formerly felt for this man instantly multiplied and coursed through her being, forcing tears to her own eyes.

“I’ll see you later,” Shelly said, blinking quickly and hoping that by stepping away she would allow Jonathan the opportunity to collect his emotions before he had to sit through this all-day staff meeting. Her mind spun with plans for what they would do tonight. She wondered if he could slip out of the meeting a little early so they could go for a twilight stroll along the Neckar River.

“Shel,” he said, as she turned to locate her sister.

“Yes?”

Jonathan didn’t stop the two tears that escaped and rolled down his smooth shaven cheeks. He seemed to be waiting for her to say something. She raised her eyebrows and waited for a cue.

Before he could give any indication of what was brewing in his melancholy mind, someone entered the room and broke their concentration by calling out, “Johnny!”

At any other time, Shelly would have burst out laughing to hear someone call Jonathan “Johnny.” He had never liked that name. He didn’t even like “John.” Ever since he found out that “John” and “Johnny” were sometimes used to mean a bathroom, he refused to let anyone call him anything other than Jonathan.

He swallowed hard. The tears evaporated, and as he turned away from Shelly, a short, spunky young woman with brown hair and brown eyes attached herself to his side and looped her arm around his middle. “I thought you were going to come over and meet me this morning,” she said. “Did you get the flowers?”

“I put them over there on the table,” he said, looking at the young woman and smiling.

Shelly thought she looked a little too old to be one of his high school students and a little too young to be a staff member. Her head barely came up to his shoulder.

“Elena,” Jonathan said, “I’d like you to meet Shelly Graham. This is Elena Mills.”

“Hi,” Elena said brightly, turning her attention to Shelly for the first time. “Are you new?”

“No, just visiting,” Shelly said, returning the same bright smile that Elena was smiling at her.

“Okay, everyone!” Mike called from the front of the room. “Find a seat. Let’s get started.”

“Shelly and I grew up together,” Jonathan explained, trying to look at Shelly but seeming to have difficulty keeping his eyes on her.

“Really? Cool. Seattle?”

Shelly nodded.

“This is perfect, isn’t it, Johnny?” Elena turned back to Shelly. “You picked the perfect day to come visit.”

“Come on, people,” Mike said loudly. “Find a seat.”

Jonathan didn’t respond to Elena’s comment.

“We better sit down,” she said, glancing over at the table. “I’ll quickly put the flowers in water. You save me a seat, okay, Johnny?”

“Nice meeting you,” Shelly said.

“Oh, you can’t go yet,” Elena said, turning back around with a swish. “You have to stay. Just five minutes. It’ll mean a lot to Johnny. Tell her she can’t go.” Elena turned her energy back to the bouquet.

Shelly’s and Jonathan’s eyes met one more time. It seemed he had the words right there, wadded up in his throat, but just couldn’t say them. Shelly couldn’t figure out what was going on. With a great effort, Jonathan tilted his head and said in a tone she had only heard him use once before, “Shelly, don’t go.” It didn’t sound at all the way Elena’s “don’t go” had sounded. For a flash of a moment, Shelly remembered that same untamed voice. That was the voice Jonathan had used in the cab of the truck when he
said, “You know I’ll always love you.” It seemed it had taken him five years to finish that sentence with, “Shelly, don’t go.”

But she had gone. She had gone far away and had been out of his life for many years. Not until this moment did Shelly begin to understand the pain she had caused her best friend when she left. She wanted to fall into his arms and tell him she was sorry. Everything inside her urged her to grab hold of him and say, “Jonathan, I’m back. I want you back.”

She couldn’t do it, not in this public place. Not now. It would be too embarrassing to both of them. No, their reunion could wait. Shelly could hold back this one, last time.

“We’re going to start with an announcement,” Mike said from the front.

Most of the staff were seated. Meredith was working her way around to the back door. Shelly and Jonathan were still standing next to each other by the back table where Elena was quickly arranging the flowers behind a beautiful tray of pastry.

“I received a call this morning that one of our staff members has an announcement to make.” Mike pointed toward the back of the room where Shelly and Jonathan were standing. “Go ahead, Jonathan. You have the floor.”

Every eye turned toward them. Jonathan gave Shelly one last, searching gaze. Again she raised her eyebrows as if to say, “What?”

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