Cold As Ice

I would like to say thank you to all the visionaries who have triumphed over the inevitable challenges present on this journey by sharing their talents through their art. The world can be a cold place, no doubt. I grew up believing that—for the most part—life was about suffering, that the world was not a safe, secure place, and that joy existed only on television. I have since learned that, yes, that is definitely one view of this multifaceted life, but there is also the balance. Move through the suffering to get to the joy, and never limit your vision based off what other people tell you is possible. They may not see what you see so easily when it first becomes apparent to you, but they will have no choice but to acknowledge your vision once it becomes too real to ignore. Only you can dream your dreams, and, therefore, only you can make them reality. Don't just dream it, live it, and the world will become a warmer place because of it.

Jayd

A sassy sixteen-year-old from Compton, California, who comes from a long line of Louisiana conjure women. She is the only one in her lineage born with brown eyes and a caul. Her grandmother appropriately named her “Jayd,” which is also the name her grandmother took on in her days as a voodoo queen in New Orleans. She lives with her grandparents, four uncles, and her cousin Jay. Jayd is in all AP classes and visits her mother on the weekend. She has a tense relationship with her father, whom she sees occasionally, and has never-ending drama in her life, whether at school or home.

Mama/Lynn Mae

When Jayd gets in over her head, her grandmother, Mama, is always there to help her. A full-time conjure woman with magical green eyes and a long list of both clients and haters, Mama also serves as Jayd's teacher, confidante, and protector.

Mom/Lynn Marie

At thirty-something years old, Lynn Marie would never be mistaken for a mother of a teenager. Jayd's mom is definitely all that and with her green eyes, she keeps the men guessing. Able to talk to Jayd telepathically, Lynn Marie is always there when Jayd needs her.

Netta

The owner of Netta's Never Nappy Beauty Shop, Netta is Mama's best friend, business partner, and godsister in their religion. She also serves as a godmother to Jayd, who works part-time at Netta's Shop.

Esmeralda

Mama's nemesis and Jayd's nightmare, this next-door neighbor is anything but friendly. She relocated to Compton from Louisiana around the same time Mama did and has been a thorn in Mama's side ever since. She continuously causes trouble for Mama and Jayd. Esmeralda's cold blue eyes have powers of their own, although not nearly as powerful as Mama's.

Rah

Rah is Jayd's first love from junior high school, who has come back into her life when a mutual friend, Nigel, transfers from Rah's high school (Westingle) to South Bay. He knows everything about her and is her spiritual confidant. Rah lives in Los Angeles but grew up with his grandparents in Compton like Jayd. He loves Jayd fiercely but has a girlfriend who refuses to go away (Trish) and a baby-mama (Sandy). Rah is a hustler by necessity and a music producer by talent. He takes care of his younger brother, Kamal, and holds the house down while his dad is locked up and his mother strips at a local club.

Misty

The word “frenemies” was coined for this former best friend of Jayd's. Misty has made it her mission to sabotage Jayd any way she can. Living around the corner from Jayd, she has the unique advantage of being an original hater from the neighborhood and at school.

KJ

He's the most popular basketball player on campus, Jayd's ex-boyfriend, and Misty's current boyfriend. Ever since he and Jayd broke up, he's made it his personal mission to persecute her.

Nellie

One of Jayd's best friends, Nellie is the prissy princess of the crew. She is also dating Chance, even though it's Nigel she's really feeling. Nellie made history at South Bay by becoming the first Black Homecoming princess and has let the crown go to her head.

Mickey

The gangster girl of Jayd's small crew, she and Nellie are best friends but often at odds with each other, mostly because Nellie secretly wishes she could be more like Mickey. A true hood girl, she loves being from Compton, and her man with no name is a true gangster. Mickey and Nigel have quickly become South Bay High's newest couple.

Jeremy

A first for Jayd, Jeremy is her white ex-boyfriend who also happens to be the most popular cat at South Bay. Rich, tall, and extremely handsome, Jeremy's witty personality and good conversation keep Jayd on her toes and give Rah a run for his money—literally.

Mickey's Man

Never using his name, Mickey's original boyfriend is a troublemaker and always hot on Mickey's trail. Always in and out of jail, Mickey's man is notorious in her hood for being a coldhearted gangster, and loves to be in control. He also has a thing for Jayd, but Jayd can't stand to be anywhere near him.

Nigel

The new quarterback on the block, Nigel is a friend of Jayd's from junior high and also Rah's best friend, making Jayd's world even smaller at South Bay High. Nigel is the star football player and dumped his ex-girlfriend at Westingle (Tasha) to be with his new baby-mama-to-be, Mickey. Jayd is caught up in the mix as a friend to them both, but her loyalty lies with Nigel because she's known him longer and he's always had her back.

Chance

The rich, white hip-hop kid of the crew, Chance is Jayd's drama homie and Nellie's boyfriend, if you let him tell it. He used to have a crush on Jayd and now has turned his attention to Nellie.

Bryan

The youngest of Mama's children and Jayd's favorite uncle, Bryan is a dj by night and works at the local grocery store during the day. He's also an acquaintance of both Rah and KJ from playing ball around the hood. Bryan often gives Jayd helpful advice about her problems with boys and hating girls alike. Out of all of Jayd's uncles, Bryan gives her grandparents the least amount of trouble.

Jay

Jay is more like an older brother to Jayd than her cousin. Like Jayd, he lives with Mama but his mother (Mama's youngest daughter) left him when he was a baby and never returned. He doesn't know his father and attends Compton High. He and Jayd often cook together and help Mama around the house.

Prologue

1:
The Ultimate Betrayal

2:
Cold As Ice

3:
All-Nighter

4:
Verbal Diarrhea

5:
Change Happens

6:
Greener Pastures

7:
Birthday Bequest

8:
Backyard Boogie

9:
Seventeen Candles

10:
The Prodigal Daughter

11:
Sweet Revenge

Epilogue

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

T
he tickle down the right side of my neck distracts me from keeping up with the steady pace of Jeremy's lips. He started out kissing my left ear and then moved on to my right. Now Jeremy's focus has returned to my mouth, and I'm glad for it. I love the way his soft lips feel against mine even though him kissing my neck is definitely my next favorite thing. I could lie on this couch with him forever as long as he keeps making me feel this good.

Jeremy and I have been making out for what seems like hours, but I'm not worried about the time. My phone's gone off twice since he got here, and I couldn't care less. I know it's Rah ready to grill me about seeing Jeremy kiss me on Friday night at the race, but I have nothing to say to him about what we do. I just hope we don't stop anytime soon. The second time around for Jeremy and me just might be what we both need.

“I'll give you a thousand dollars for that thought,” Jeremy says, pulling away from my lips and promptly kissing me on my nose. We both need to come up for air, but not for too long, I hope. It's been a while since I had a make-out session without having to look over my shoulder for a crazy ex-girlfriend or baby-mama on attack mode.

“And you probably would, too,” I say, kissing Jeremy on his neck. By the way he's shaking, I can tell he likes it. I keep kissing, softly biting his flesh as I smile at every involuntary jump he makes.

“Come on, Jayd. I'm serious,” Jeremy says, kissing me on my right cheek and then again on my ear. If he doesn't stop, we're going to get into some serious trouble I know I'm not ready for. I'll be seventeen in a couple weeks, and all my friends are waiting on me to lose my virginity because I'm the last one in our crew and probably the whole damn school. But I'm not going out like that—not yet. Jeremy continues, “From now on we need to have full disclosure—no secrets. That's the only way this can work.”

“Full disclosure? I'm not sure I can do that,” I say, easing my way out from under him and sitting up straight on the small couch that doubles as my weekend bed at my mother's apartment. The couch was already a mess before Jeremy got here, and now it looks like a tornado hit it. The pillows are strewn across the living room floor, with my sheets and blanket across the coffee table. If my mom walked in right now she'd be more upset by the mess in her apartment than the boy making out with her daughter.

“Why not?” Jeremy asks in that innocent way of his that makes my heart melt. He's so adorable when he's on a mission for information. “Look, Jayd, I'm serious about having a committed relationship with you, and that means we have to be completely honest with each other, even if it means having to hear something we might not want to. So what's on your mind?”

I look into Jeremy's blue eyes and see his sincerity. But I still don't feel comfortable telling him everything about how I, Mama, and my mom get down.

“Because, Jeremy, there are some things I can never tell you or anyone else about my life,” I say as Jeremy sits up next to me. “It's not that I don't want to tell you or that I'm keeping anything from you on purpose. It's just the way it is. I hope you can understand.” I really, really do. Me being a voodoo priestess is a big adjustment for Jeremy, I know. But it's a nonnegotiable part of my life that all my friends have learned to deal with in one way or another.

“I can respect that, Lady J. I can't help but hope that one day you can tell me everything, no holds barred.” Jeremy pulls me into his arms, and I accept his warm embrace. He always smells fresh, like Irish Spring and seawater. It must be from all the surfing he does on a daily basis. “Anyway, I have to get going. I'm meeting the gang at the pier and still need to get my boards from my bro,” he says, kissing me on the back of my neck before letting me go.

“Not yet,” I say, rising with him. “We've got all day.” I know I have a ton of things to do before I head back to my grandmother's house in Compton this evening, but all that can wait if he'll stay.

“Ah, baby, I wish I could stay and hang, but we have a surf competition coming up, and we're in need of some serious practice.” I never knew surfing was more than a hobby to Jeremy. I had no idea he competed outside of his crew, just like I didn't know that he and Chance drag raced for money. It seems like I have a lot to learn about my elusive friend.

“Full disclosure, huh? You have a few secrets of your own I'm not privy to, don't you, Mr. Weiner?” I ask, pushing him on his lower back as we walk to the front door. He's got a cute butt for a white boy, and I love his strong, tan legs, even if they are covered in hair.

“We all do. But for you, Miss Jackson, I'll be an open book.” Jeremy turns around and strokes my face with the back of his right hand before bending down for one last kiss. I gently grab the back of his head, entangling my fingers in his thick curls. Jeremy's hands move from my face down to my waist, and he pulls me in closer. Here we go again.

“Damn. Do you have to go now?” I whine as he releases me from his embrace. Jeremy opens the door and steps over the threshold, officially ending our make-up make-out afternoon. Every time Jeremy kisses me like this, I feel swept away in the moment. This fool's got some power over me, and we both know it.

“I love you, too, Jayd,” Jeremy says, kissing me on the forehead before jogging down the stairs without allowing me to respond. That fool just said he loved me and ran off. What the hell?

I step back inside and close the door as my phone rings once again. I push the silence button and notice the time, realizing I need to get a move on, too. I just remembered I was supposed to meet my crew at Nigel's house about an hour ago. No wonder Rah's been texting and calling me like crazy. I lost complete track of time, but that's how it is once Jeremy and I get started, and I don't regret a single minute.

While relocking the multiple bolts on my mom's front door, I swear I can feel someone's eyes on me. I walk over to the living room window and look outside over the neighbor's tall trees to see if I notice anyone staring my way. I don't have time to play 007 right now. I have to clean up this place and get ready to go, which includes a shower and doing my hair. It's still early in the afternoon, and I know my crew's not going anywhere anytime soon. I'll be there as soon as I can, but I'm not rushing for anyone. Besides, I feel too good from Jeremy's surprise visit and love confession to care about being late or who may be spying on us. I just want to enjoy this feeling a little while longer before I have to deal with my crew and their inevitable issues.