Come to Me Quietly (Closer to You) (23 page)

Christopher dropped the remote to the cushion. “I’m going to get out of here. You sure you don’t want to come?”

“No, I’m good.”

At this point, he couldn’t drag me out of here.

Christopher inclined his head in the direction of Aly’s room. “Glad you’re here, anyway. You can keep an eye out for her.”

“Yeah, of course.”

Christopher went to his room to change, and waved over his head as he left.

I bounced a little more. Time had slowed to the most excruciating pace. I kept looking at her door, willing Gabe to emerge.

Thirty minutes later, he did. Her door slowly opened and Dickhead appeared. The good-guy expression I was sure he reserved only for Aly transformed the second he caught my eye. He lifted his chin in a silent insult, tossed me a grin that smacked of arrogance and self-satisfaction as he pulled her door shut.

The intense need to completely take him out engulfed me. I wanted to make him pay for showing up here. For thinking for a second he belonged with her.

For being stupid enough to fuck with me.

I just sat there, leering at the little twit who was obviously so ignorant he believed I’d continue to sit here if he kept looking at me that way.

I was gritting my teeth, itching to loose my aggression on him, when he turned his back and headed out the door. That was all it took before I was at hers.

I didn’t knock, just turned the knob and let myself into the muted light of her room. Tonight, the blinds were shut. Thin lines of moonlight bled through the slats, and a small lamp sent a golden glow crawling up the wall behind her dressing table. It cast the rest of her room in shadows.

With her back to me, Aly stood as a silhouette in front of her bed. Her work clothes had been discarded at her feet, and she’d pulled on those same pink sleep shorts she always wore, giving cover to that glorious ass. She was in the middle of pulling a tank over her head. Waves of chunky hair fell down her back, all mussed and sexy. My fingers twitched, because damn it, I
really
wanted to touch, but I stayed rooted because I figured I was in no frame of mind to give in to it.

Over her shoulder, she peeked at me as she adjusted the hem of her shirt. Discomfort lined her face, the green of her eyes subdued. “I was just coming to find you,” she whispered.

Swallowing hard, I stared at her from across the room, not sure what to do with the hostility still boiling in my veins. I felt on edge. Unhinged. But
this
felt completely different than the sickness that would forever darken my soul. It felt a little too much like the night I’d lost it at the bar at the mention of her name.

Motherfucking trigger
.

I reached back to lock her door before I turned to look at her, rushing an agitated hand through my hair, trying to quell the fucking insanity she spurred in me. “What are you trying to do to me?” My tongue felt thick as I struggled through the admission. “I don’t… fuck, I don’t even recognize myself around you, Aly. I thought I was going to lose my mind out there, thinking about you in here with him.”

Aly slowly turned around and took one step forward. With her head angled low and tipped to the side, she squinted, like maybe I’d just pissed her off.

That was okay because I was a little bit pissed off, too.

Lines deepened between her eyes, disbelief laced in the words that spilled from her mouth. “Do you think for one second I’d choose him over you, Jared? He came here to tell me he missed me. That he wanted to be with me and he’d do anything to fix whatever had gone wrong between us. But the entire time, the only thing I could think about was you in the other room. How the only thing in this world I want is you. Don’t you understand that?”

All that fucking aggression snapped, like a band that had been stretched too tight, colliding with the need she had so tightly spun up in me. I crossed the room in two long strides. One second later, I had her in my arms, lifting her feet off the floor as my mouth seized hers. I was kissing her, my tongue demanding as I dragged her to her bed.

Her covers were piled in a heaped mess from where we’d slept curled in them last night, where we’d kissed and tempted and left ourselves panting and still in need. Our scent still lingered in them, thick and strong. Unwilling to break our frenzied kiss, I shoved the covers out of the way with one arm, the other supporting her back as I laid her on the bed.

Aly arched up as if she ached.

I grasped her perfect face between firm hands, my hold just as commanding as my mouth. Consumed, I pressed the length of my body into hers, blanketing her as my forearms fell to the bed to support my weight.

I wanted to possess her. Take her.

Fuck
.

I wanted it all.

Aly moaned as her fingers threaded in my hair. She murmured assurances at my mouth in between our desperate bid to bring each other closer, our mouths just as frantic as the beating of her heart. “It’s you, Jared… you… only you.”

Growling, I pulled back, my fingers spreading out over the back of her head as my thumbs rushed along her delicate jaw. We were nose-to-nose, and I was unable to discern the sharp gasps of air she drew into her lungs from mine. The words scraped from my throat. “Did you tell him that you’re mine?” My hands tightened, underscoring the madness she created in me. “Did you tell him that you belong to me?”

Those green eyes darkened, hinted at her fears, spoke of her desires. “Do I?” came as a plea from between her full lips.

My heart skidded, and the frenzy that had racked my body stilled.

Obviously, it was me who belonged to her.

I ran my thumb along her jaw, smiled softly at the girl. Her eyes searched, begged, everything about her perfect and kind.

My chest squeezed.

Fuck. I was in so deep.

“Aleena,” I whispered, before I brushed my lips across hers.

A statement.

She was the only one who’d
touched
me in years, the only one who’d made me feel.

Tipping her chin up, she met my eye, her fingers gentle as they fluttered across my face. “You,” she quietly murmured.

I smoothed the back of my hand down the flush on her cheek. Her mouth dropped open as she leaned into my touch. Joy teased along the fringes of my consciousness, quivered, and rose. This – this was our deception, where I wanted to live until the day I died. Where nothing was real but the secrets we whispered in the night.

I shifted to my hands and knees, bending my elbows as I dropped my shoulders down to kiss her softly, slowly. Because I never wanted it to end. Our tongues played.

And I reveled in this fantasy.

Aly cupped my face, lightly scratching her nails through the stubble coating my jaw, her smile warm. Tingles spread and coiled, flaring the unending need for her that seemed to never let go.

Gentle hands roamed over my shoulders, down my back, unhurried, just as unhurried as our kiss. I sucked in a ragged breath when she ran both of her index fingers just under the waistband of my jeans, dipping them into the two dimples peeking out just above my hips.

Flames scorched my already heated skin.

God, the girl set me on fire. Innocent and sweet, and still the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.

“Aly, what are you doing?” I warned.

She just nipped at my chin and flirted with the hem of my shirt, before she flattened both palms on the small of my back and slipped them up my skin, taking the shirt with her as she went.

I lowered my weight to my elbows and ducked my head to twist out of the shirt as Aly dragged it over my head. She giggled lightly when she did. There was something so pure about her smile. It set me reeling, and I kissed her again, couldn’t stop. I pressed my bare chest against the thin cloth covering her breasts.

My palms wandered down her sides. I pulled at the bottom of her shirt before I edged back enough to slip it up between us. We were a tangle of arms when I tugged it loose, our faces a breath apart.

In the dim light, her hair was the deepest black, her eyes a searing green. For a moment, I just gazed at her, curling a lock of her hair around my index finger. A bond. I didn’t get it, why anchoring myself to her this way felt as if I were home… even when home was what I’d destroyed so long ago.

Aly just stared, her throat bobbing heavily as she swallowed down whatever doubt flashed across her features. Shaky fingers reached out to caress my bottom lip. “I am yours, Jared. Take me.”

Deep inside, I thrashed, a fury of nerves and need and a broken spirit that for the first time felt as if it were almost whole. Fear beat a steady drum and bound itself to my heart. It danced with the guilt, the shame of what I already knew I was about to do.

Because every part of me knew this was fucking wrong.

All except for the part that knew her, wanted her, the part that was drowning in a desire that screamed louder than any lash of fear and hurt worse than any lick of shame.

The part that knew the only thing that mattered was Aly.

My Aly.

I sat up on my knees as I leaned over to work her shorts and panties down her slender legs. I tossed them behind me to the floor.

Aly wet her lips, her chest rising and falling in spastic quakes, her gaze intense. “Jared, please, I need you.”

Lust shot through me as I looked down at her fully exposed, lying back on the bed that had become like a reprieve from the storm that ruled my life. With hungry eyes, I traced the slope of her neck, the swell of her breasts, the curve of her hips. Her knees were bent, her feet planted, her arms draped over her head where her hair was fanned out, framing her perfect face.

No doubt, she was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. But tonight, looking at her felt different, felt like maybe I was looking at life. Another lie. One when behind her door, I’d be foolish enough to believe.

I rose from the bed and shed the rest of my clothes.

A small smile whispered at just one side of her mouth as she watched me. Trust I didn’t deserve edged out the fear on her face.

Nudging her knees apart, I climbed back onto the bed and settled between her thighs. I kissed her slowly while my body screamed. I pushed up on one hand and held her face in the other, my thumb caressing the apple of her cheek, searching her eyes for any sign that I should stop.

Her jaw was slack, her skin flushed. Aly arched her back, forcing her chest into mine, her neck extended as she begged for my touch. She lifted her chin as if in supplication, offering herself to me. “I am yours,” she promised again.

Need tumbled through me, surged, and rushed. I groaned into her neck and kissed along the sensitive skin. My nose ran along the ridge of her jaw as I held her by the back of her head. My fingers got lost in the mass of her hair. I pressed a gentle kiss to the hollow beneath her ear, before I turned to the swells of her breasts, devouring her skin, feasting on the pure, taking the good.

“Please,” she begged as she lifted her hips.

Straining, my body begged, warring with the hesitation. I was at her center, rubbing shamelessly against her warmth, our skin bare as I brought us closer than we’d ever been.

My arms caged her, fingers boring into the skin at the base of her scalp, my voice little more than a ragged grunt. “Aly, are you sure? We said we weren’t going to do this.”

She buried her face in my neck and mumbled, “All I want is you.”

It was the thought of being fully lost in her that left me without resolve. We’d spent so many nights as fools, pretending we wouldn’t end up in this very place. Those nights had only been a taste of the pleasure that I knew was now to come.

I’d seen those pink packs of pills in her bathroom a thousand times. And I was clean. I’d checked that shit out after I began sleeping in her bed. No chance would I risk spreading her any filth.

My stomach tightened, and I edged back until I was poised at her center. I barely pressed into her, let her warmth send shivers rushing up my spine as I watched her mouth part and her eyes darken exactly the way I imagined they would.

“Jared.” Aly swallowed frantically. She seemed to be flailing for solid ground. Fingertips dug into the bunched muscles of my shoulders that were held tight in restraint. The nerves that raced across her skin were palpable, lifted as goose bumps, and spread as heat. Aly quivered a smile and exhaled a shaky breath across my face. “I feel you.”

Shit
.

I was about to lose all control. I pulled back before I took her deeper. Aly’s legs trembled and she tightened them on my hips.

Her face pinched. “Ow.”

Fuck, I hated myself so badly for doing this. My knees shook, my elbows digging into the bed as my hands fisted in her hair. She was so tight. Painfully tight. I couldn’t fucking breathe as I slowly spread her.

Broke her.

Took what never should have been mine.

“Aleena” wept from my mouth.

Tears gathered in her eyes and streaked down the sides of her face, trailing along the crease of her ears before they disappeared into her hair.

“Fuck, Aly, baby, I’m so sorry… I’m so fucking sorry.”

A smile trembled at her mouth. “Don’t.” Hoarseness coated her voice. “I want this. I want you. It’s just… all of this… it’s perfect.”

A sheen of sweat glistened across her forehead, and strands of hair clung to her dampened face. I swept it back, looking down at the girl who’d completely shaken me as she stared up at me. Her expressive eyes shone with affection.

We just lay there.

Bonded as one.

If I believed in soul mates or any of that shit, I knew she was mine. I could feel it, this connection with her I couldn’t possibly share with anyone else. Like we fit, this fucked-up puzzle that made no sense until we aligned the pieces. But it wasn’t possible. I didn’t get the happy ending, and even if I did, I’d only ruin it. Just like I knew I was ruining her now.

I held myself rigid, refusing to move while she adjusted, while the shock of what I’d taken from her passed. Her uneven breaths slowed and her legs loosened the grip they had on my hips. My thighs shook with the loose thread I had on my control.