Commodity (8 page)

“It feels more stupid to me now.”

“It wasn’t.  It was brave.  Incredibly fucking brave.  I haven’t heard of courage like that outside of combat.”

“What else was I supposed to do?” I ask.  “Just let him get away with it?  I didn’t really think about who he was.  When I found the pictures…I couldn’t just let that happen, could I?”

“A lot of people would.  In fact, a lot of people did.”

“I saw their faces,” I say.  “I saw how scared they were in the pictures.  I knew what he planned to do to them.”

“So did others.  He didn’t act alone.”

“They all planned to profit from it.”

“Do you really think they were the only ones who knew what was going on?”

“No.”  I take a deep breath.  “I think there were others.  Jillian in accounting—she must have seen the discrepancies before I did.”

“But you did something about it.”

“When I was in college, I took a class in modern crisis.”  I stop for a moment and twist my fingers together underneath the edge of the sleeping bag, remembering.  “It was offered by the philosophy department.  I did a paper on human trafficking.  I talked to a family whose daughter had disappeared when they were traveling.  They never heard from her again, and it tore the family apart.  The couple got divorced, and their younger daughter ended up on drugs.  She even tried to kill herself.  That was all I could think about.  What if one of those girls had been her?  Not exactly her, but someone just like her.  All those girls got back to their families.”

My body shudders, and I close my eyes.  The memories of the family—
my
family—flood back into my head.

“And you were abducted later and nearly met the same fate in store for those girls.”

“It didn’t happen, though.  I got away from them.”

“That’s how I know you are strong enough to deal with all of this.  You’re going to have to be.  It’s going to get worse.”

I roll to my back to try to see his expression, but in the dark, I can only see the outline of his face.

“What do you mean?”

“Think about it, Hannah.”  Falk props himself up on his elbow, and some of the light from the fire filters through the tent and creates eerie shadows on his face.  “The women and children are gone.  We know the men on the surface are all dead.  We know those people who were underground survived.  Who do you think is more likely to have been underground, men or women?”

“Men, I suppose.”

“You’ve become a very rare asset, Ms. Savinski.  If I’m right, and I think I am, that makes you valuable.  People act very differently when they think there is something valuable around them.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that we’re in a unique situation and that people do things you don’t expect them to do when they feel their survival is at stake.  Those guys out there may seem like they’re friendly, but that can change in a heartbeat.”

“Is that why you didn’t want me to talk to them?”

“In a sense, yes.”  Falk clears his throat.  “I don’t want you to get too friendly with them.  I don’t want you to give the impression that you are available.  At some point, someone’s going to take advantage of that.”

I narrow my eyes as I take in what he’s saying.  I am the only woman in this group.  Chances are, we’ll find other survivors, and chances are those survivors are going to be additional men.  At some point, mob mentality takes over.

“Like what Hudson was going to do with those girls.”

“A lot like that, yes.”

What exactly does that mean for me?

I haven’t thought about the future since the day I took the information I had and sent it to the authorities.  Everything has been very moment-to-moment as I was dragged from the local police department to the prosecutor in the county courthouse to the governor’s office.  Then those people from Washington showed up, and I was further tossed back and forth as they gathered more information.

Then the assault.

More police.  More government officials.  I didn’t have time to think about the future or what it held for me.  After the arraignment and Hudson’s threats, I’d taken him at his word.  I didn’t expect to have a future.

Now no one knows what the future holds, but I know one thing—I’m not going to be doing any computer work any time soon.  I also know my survival skills aren’t exactly at the same level as Falk’s.  Eventually, I’m either going to have to prove my worth in other ways, or I am going to be seen as good for only one thing.

“I’m scared.”

I hear Falk roll over and feel his body heat closer to my back.  A moment later, he snakes his arm around my waist.  I tense at first, but when he doesn’t move any closer—just leaves his arm there around me—I relax against the ground.  I can feel the exhaustion in my limbs creep up into my head, and I yawn.

“Is this okay?” Falk asks quietly.  He tightens his arm around my middle.

“Yeah, it’s okay.”

“I know you’re scared,” he says.  “That’s one of the reasons I’m keeping you close.”

“What are the other reasons?”  I yawn again.  I can’t keep my eyes open any longer.

“A topic for another time.”

“If you’ll just take a look at this television.  It’s on sale right now, and I think it will be perfect for you,” the salesman says.

“Sorry, but I’m in a rush, late for work, and my boss will kill me if I’m late again.”

Another salesman approaches.  Then another.

“We have fabulous sales for you.”

“I can’t right now, really.”

“I’m sorry, ma’am.” The head salesman comes up to me, and the others shift back.  “Please forgive them, but they just found out they are all going to lose their jobs.  The store is closing.  They have to sell all the inventory before they can leave.”

I’m getting angry.

“That’s too bad,” I say, “but I’m late.  I have to get to work, or my boss will kill me.”

I push my way through the men and into my closet.  I’m only wearing a towel, and I have to get dressed for work.  I turn to lock the closet door behind me, but the lock isn’t working.  One of the salesmen pushes his way inside.

“You want to buy something from me,” he says as he approaches.  I can’t make out his face, but there’s a scar on it, just below his eye.  “You know you do.”

“No…”  I can barely utter the word.  He’s pushing me against the rack of clothes behind me, and he reaches between my legs, fingering me.  I turn my head to the side.  I just want him to go away and leave me alone, but he doesn’t.

“Please,” I whisper.  “I’m late.  My boss will kill me.”

I wake alone in the damp tent.  The remnants of the nightmare buzz around in my head, and I feel queasy.  My leg throbs painfully, and my hip is sore from sleeping on the ground.  I can hear voices outside, speaking in hushed tones as I sit up and rub my eyes.

When I try to stand, I drop back to the sleeping bag, grunting from the pain in my leg.  It’s stiffened up a lot overnight, and putting weight on it hurts like a bitch.  I press my hands against it, as if I can hold in the pain.

Falk appears at the tent entrance.

“You all right?”

“I’m okay,” I say through clenched teeth.

“Bullshit.”  He smiles slightly at me.  “I know that has to hurt.”

“It’s just a little stiff.”

Falk kicks off his shoes and enters the tent, going to one of the bags set off to the side.  He pulls out a bottle of ibuprofen and hands me three of them along with a bottle of water from the cooler.

“Take them.  It will help a little.”

I nod and take the pills.

“Want some help getting up?” Falk asks.  “Walking around may loosen it up again.  You should eat, too, so those pills don’t upset your stomach.  After you eat, I’ll check it out and put a new bandage on it.”

“I can do it.”  Using my hands for support, I manage to get myself to my feet.  Falk takes a step forward, offering his hand to me, but I don’t take it.  He leaves it there anyway in case I change my mind.

I hobble out of the tent.  Caesar and Beck are out by the fire, trying to cook something in aluminum foil over the coals.  Nearby, one of the camp stoves holds a bubbling pot of coffee.

“Want some?” Beck says with a smile as he holds up a coffee mug.

“Please,” I respond.

“I’ll get it.”  Falk walks around the fire, ignoring Beck’s offered cup, and grabs a different mug to fill with coffee.

Beck glares and is about to say something when Caesar speaks up.

“We need to figure out what’s next,” he says.  “Are we going to stay here or find more habitable ground?”

“We’re going to a group of apartments near here,” Falk says.  He fills the mug from the pot and brings it to me.

“Says who?” Beck asks as he crosses his arms in front of his chest.

“It makes the most sense,” Falk replies.  “One of the buildings isn’t damaged at all, and I have supplies there.  It offers protection, and everyone can have their own living space but remain close to the group.  There’s still running water there—enough to give us time to dig a well if we need to.  It’s the best option for now.”

“It does make sense,” Caesar says.

Beck narrows his eyes at his friend.

“That’s not the point,” Beck mutters.  “We’re just going to go to
his
apartment complex because
he
says so?  That’s bullshit.  There are other options.”

“It’s as good a plan as any,” Caesar says.  “It’s not like we’re stuck there.  If we come up with better arrangements later, we can change.”

“It’s bullshit,” Beck repeats.

Falk ignores their exchange and starts breaking down our tent.  Ryan steps out of his own tent a minute later, stretching and rubbing his temple.

“How much of that scotch did we drink last night?” he asks.

“All of it,” Caesar responds.

“That’s what my head is telling me.”  Ryan reaches his hand out, and he and Beck bump their fists together.  “How about you, bro?”

“About the same,” Beck replies.  “Want coffee?”

“Hell, yeah!”  Ryan smiles, stretches again, and looks over at me.  “Good morning!”

“Good morning,” I reply, smiling.  Even hungover, Ryan is in a better mood than the rest of them.

Falk flashes me a look of warning, which I assume has to do with me speaking to the others.  I raise my eyebrows at him.  I know he doesn’t trust them, but it’s not like I can completely avoid talking.

Despite Beck’s complaining, we move what we have back to the apartment complex before midday.  Caesar and Ryan opt to share the apartment below Falk’s while Beck takes the one across from them on the ground floor.  The lanterns and some of the other necessities are distributed, and the brothers head off to look for more supplies.  There’s discussion about what to do with all the bodies in the nearby area, and Ryan offers to start digging graves.

Falk insists I stay with him in his apartment.  I debate arguing with him about it—there are plenty of other apartments, and I’m used to having my own space—but one look from him, and I realize it will be pointless.  I have to admit, I do feel safer with him close to me.

“I can’t properly watch out for you if you are in your own place,” he says.  “You can have the bed.  I’ll sleep on the couch.  I’m going to start teaching you to shoot, too.”

“I’m still not so sure about that.”  I start taking supplies from a backpack and look for a place in the kitchen to store them.

“You’re going to learn anyway.”  Falk brings another backpack over and places it near my feet.  “Once we have everything set up here, we’ll start your training.”

“You are very bossy, you know.”  I put my hands on my hips and tilt my head to look up at him.

“I have to be,” he says simply.  “That’s the only way I can protect you.  I need to know where you are at all times.  I also need to know that you can protect yourself if I’m not there.”

His shoulders are straight and his expression tells me that he’s not going to change his mind.  I shake my head and go back to organizing.

There’s definitely a part of me that appreciates his take-charge attitude.  If he weren’t here, I have no idea what I would do.  I wouldn’t know what sort of items we’d need to survive or what type of environment would offer us the best chances.  I’d be without direction and probably scared out of my mind.

Given that, maybe I can put up with his bossiness.

For now, at least.

Once we have everything stored, we go outside and assist Caesar in building a large fire pit.  He and Ryan have already gathered a good number of stones to surround it while Beck digs a large, round depression.

“It will be a good place to cook once the gas runs out,” Caesar says.  “It’ll be easier to cook out here anyway as long as the weather is good.  We should find a suitable place to keep communal property.”

“There’s a shed nearby,” Falk says.  “I think the landlord keeps lawn equipment in it, but it would be a good place to store kindling to keep it dry.  It’s big enough for other stuff, too.”

“Good idea,” Caesar says.  “Let’s check it out.”

The shed is full of lawnmowers, leaf-blowers, shovels and other landscaping items.  Ryan moves them out to the parking lot so we can make room for the things we’ll need close to us.  Falk heads off to find more stones to line the pit, promising me he wouldn’t be far away.  I decide to busy myself collecting all the nearby sticks to start a kindling pile in the shed.  I don’t think my leg is up for any heavy lifting.

There are plenty of small branches lying around, and I break them over my knee so they’re more uniform and will stack well.  I’m on my third stack when a voice startles me.

I glance over my shoulder and breathe slowly to calm my heart.

“Making yourself useful?”  Beck is right behind me, causing me to jump.

“Just doing what I can.”

“Uh huh.”  Beck leans against the trunk of a tree and watches me.

“Did you need something?” I ask when he doesn’t say anything else.

“You aren’t really with that asshole, are ya?”

“Falk?”  I don’t have to ask, but I do anyway.  It’s obvious who he means.

“Yeah. 
Falk
.”  Beck sneers the name and rolls his eyes.  “The asshole who thinks he owns you.”

I press my lips together and stand up, looking straight at him.  I tense my fingers around the branch in my hand.

“He’s just trying to keep everyone safe.”

“He’s on a power trip.”

I watch Beck’s face carefully.  This isn’t a topic I care to debate with him—his mind is set, and I’m not going to speak against Falk, not at this point.

“So are you with him or not?” Beck asks when I don’t take the bait.

“He’s my bodyguard,” I say softly.

“Bodyguard?”  Beck looks at me quizzically, pushes away from the tree, and moves a little closer.  “Now, what would you need a bodyguard for?”

Shit.  I shouldn’t have said anything about it.  This is likely why Falk didn’t want me talking to anyone.  Talking leads to questions—questions I don’t want to answer.  I should have kept my mouth shut.

“I don’t,” I say quickly.  “He’s not, not really.  Um…he’s just a friend.  He likes to watch out for me.”

I sound ridiculous, and I know the lie is completely transparent even as the words leave my mouth.  I can tell by Beck’s expression that he doesn’t believe a word of it.

“You’re full of shit,” Beck says with a chuckle.  He steps up in front of me and places his hand on my hip as he leans in close.  “Now why are you lying to me?”

I freeze, my skin crawling at his touch.  I can’t move and I can’t breathe.  He places his other hand on the other side of my body, pulling me against him.  I can feel each of his fingers as he splays them out on my side, pressing his fingertips into my flesh.

“I’m glad to hear he’s just a friend though.  Maybe you should think about expanding your other relationships.”

“I’m fine.”  My voice is barely audible.  “Really, I am.”

I try to take a step back, but he keeps his grip.  I turn my head away, feeling the tension running down from my neck and pooling in my feet, immobilizing me.

“You don’t have to run away from me,” Beck whispers as he presses his mouth into my hair near my ear.  “I just want you to know—”

“Get your fucking hands off of her!”

Falk is between us before I even realize it’s him.  He shoves Beck backward, nearly causing him to fall.

“What the hell is your problem?” Beck screams at him.  His hands come up in front of him, balled into fists.

“
You
are my problem.  Pretty soon, I’m going to be your problem, you pissy little beta.  Now don’t fucking touch her again, or I will smack your cock-holster closed.”

Jesus Christ.

“Falk, it’s okay.”  I touch the back of his shirt, but he shrugs me off.

“It is
not
fucking okay!” he yells as he turns to me.

“You need to watch yourself,” Beck says with a sneer.  “I don’t know who the fuck you think you are, but I’m not putting up with your shit, and she doesn’t have to either!”

Caesar appears between them, putting a hand on each man’s chest and holding them apart.

“Cool it, you two,” he says.  “Come on, now.  We’re all on edge.  Let’s just go back to our corners, okay?”

“I didn’t fucking start it,” Beck says.

“You fucking started it when you touched her.”  Falk steps forward, and Caesar pushes back.

“That’s enough.”  Caesar stares at Falk, but addresses Beck.  “Beck, go on, get out of here.”

“This ain’t over, motherfucker.”  Beck points his finger at Falk before stalking off toward his own apartment.

Caesar drops his hand but keeps his eyes on Falk, who watches Beck’s back until he is out of sight.  Once Beck is gone, Falk focuses on me.

“You all right?”

“I’m fine.”  My voice isn’t convincing, even to me.

Falk narrows his eyes, pushes Caesar’s hand away from his chest and walks to me.  He reaches out slowly and traces a finger over my arm.