Concisus (4 page)

My throat is thick from emotion. I shake my head and smile through tears. The entire time Ryan and I were missing, Andi never gave up hope. Everyone else thought we were dead, but she kept on hoping. Words can’t express what I feel, so I hug her, probably a bit too tight because, she eventually pries my arms from her neck and gasps.

“Sorry,” I squeak, and wipe away tears.

“I’m glad you’re not mad about the songs. There were a few odd ones that I wasn’t quite sure about.”

A hearty laugh escapes me. “There’s a few that have some sentimental value, but I don’t mind other people listening to them. In fact I kind of hope they do.”

I’m about to play a rather amusing song when a flash of light catches my eye. “What’s that?” I demand pointing at Andi’s finger.

Andi’s eyes twinkle. I immediately regret asking the question because I don’t want to hear her answer. “I’ve got some news to share with you, but I wanted to give you a proper welcome home first.” Andi holds up her hand. My stomach drops at the sight of the engagement ring on her finger, a delicately etched gold band with a large diamond encircled by smaller diamonds. Not at all Andi’s taste.

“Jackson picked out the design himself,” she explains, sounding like an overly proud mom displaying her new macaroni necklace.

“Oh, Andi,” I blurt. She mistakes my response as shock, not concern.

Giving me a playful nudge, Andi teases. “Wow, you’re practically speechless. How often does that happen?”

I compose myself enough to say, “Congratulations Andi. I’m so happy for you. Have you set a date?”

“December 22nd,” she sings.

My mouth is suddenly dry, my voice scratchy. “That’s so soon.”

“He asked me a while ago, but you were still lost in the wilderness.” She skips over to me and links her arm in mine. “So I couldn’t ask you before now to be my Maid of Honor.”

I’m both touched and panicked. If I can’t fix the pod problem, in a little over a month and a half, Andi will be married. Andi assumes the squeak that comes out of me is a yes.

“Come on. Let me show you all the plans.” She half drags me into her office where she pulls a huge binder from a desk drawer and drops it on the surface, making a loud thud. “Here’s a picture of my dress.” I look at a simple, ivory dress that will look gorgeous on her. I nod my approval, and she continues on to the next page.

“I know a lot of the winter brides are going with classic Christmas colors, but I was lucky enough to get a sunset wedding, so I decided to go with silver bridesmaid dresses —”

I nod and appear to look at the pictures, but my eyes are unfocused and I don’t hear a word. I don’t have much time to un-program her. If she truly loved Jackson I would be thrilled for her, but I know better. They have nothing in common except an overpowering, unnatural attraction. Just as I once had with Brody.

“Brett. Brett!” Andi snaps her fingers in my face. “What’s wrong with you? I know you’re not exactly into all this girly stuff, but I thought you’d be excited enough for me to fake it.”

“I’m sorry. I guess I’m still in shock. You barely know each other.” I won’t blurt out my suspicions because she might not believe me. In her place, I wouldn’t.

Andi snaps the binder shut with more force than necessary.

“You have to admit things are moving a little fast,” I say.

Andi leans back and crosses her arms. “Oh, I get it. You’re confusing Brody with Jackson. Believe me, Jackson is nothing like Brody, and what we share is more than just a physical attraction.”

“You’re probably right. Marrying Brody would have been the biggest mistake of my life. You can’t blame me for trying to protect you from potentially making the same one. I barely know Jackson. Tell me, what do you have in common?” I hope my tactic to open her eyes to the truth will work.

Andi taps a finger against her lip before gushing, “He’s the sweetest guy I’ve ever met. He treats me like a princess, and he’s a great kisser. Once you get to know him, you’ll love him.”

I refrain from pointing out how she completely avoided answering my question. “He sounds great. I can’t wait to get to know him. So what do you guys like to do together?”

“He really likes football reruns and comedies. We spend a lot of time in the video game chamber. Football’s his favorite, but he likes racing and combat games too. After the dinner rush last night, he showed me how he makes his lasagna.”

“It sounds like you’re doing everything he likes.” I look pointedly at her as I stress the last two words.

“Why would you say that?” Andi sounds shocked. “When he can he joins me at dinner and sometimes he meets me in the rec hall. He really gets along with everyone.”

This is
so
not going as I hoped. “Does he actually join in at the rec hall or does he just watch?”

“Just what does that have to do with anything?” Andi snaps. Then she turns and stares down at the wedding binder. A long time passes before she speaks. Without looking at me, she says, “You don’t like him.”

“Jackson seems like a perfectly nice guy. He’s just not the right guy for you.” I clamp my mouth shut before I can add that he’s not Jeremy.

Andi turns and glares at me. “And you’re such an expert on Mr. Right. The girl who’s on to the next guy before she’s even told the last one it’s over.”

She’s being tremendously unfair considering that she once told me to keep my options open with both Ryan and Brody until I figured out my own feelings, but she’s hurt and angry and the emotions she’s feeling aren’t necessarily her own. Any response on my part will only make things worse. So I don’t say anything.

Andi doesn’t apologize, but instead picks up a pen, flips through her binder, and crosses something out. “I don’t feel comfortable having someone in the bridal party with such a clear dislike for my fiancé.”

“Has that much changed that we can’t be honest about our feelings with each other? Do you really want me to smile and pretend that everything’s fine?” I ask.

Andi drums her fingers on the desk, refusing to meet my eyes. Finally, she sighs and says, “No. I don’t want you to lie, but Jackson’s a part of my life. You can’t hate him and still be friends with me.”

I can’t lose Andi’s friendship. Until she’s away from the pod’s programming, she’ll only believe that what she and Jackson have is true love, which means I need to wholeheartedly accept him and figure out the pod problem on my own. Despite my rant about telling the truth, I lie.

“When I was lost, the thought of seeing everyone again kept me going. I guess I’m just having a hard time accepting that things have changed. I don’t hate Jackson, and as long as he makes you happy, I’m happy.”

Andi’s gaze softens. “I still think all you have to do is get to know him.”

“I’m sure you’re right.” We leave the office and find Ryan and Jeremy bent over the robots discussing the machines’ different functions. They quickly stand up, looking like kids caught with their hands in the cookie jar.

“I was starting to worry that the two of you would be in there all day discussing wedding stuff,” Ryan says and hugs Andi. “I guess congratulations are in order.” Andi stiffens, but Ryan doesn’t seem aware of the tension.

As we say goodbye, I note Andi’s sour tone and wonder if my comments about Jackson have permanently damaged our friendship.

Ryan and I are halfway to Jake and Molly’s new field lab when a high-pitched squeal assaults my ears.

“Ryan!” Kelly yells and launches herself at him.

I want to yank her by the hair and rip her off of him, but I remind myself that as far as she aware, they’re still dating. Fighting the urge to vomit, I walk away and give them privacy. I don’t want an audience when I break up with Brody and assume Ryan feels the same about his breakup.

A short distance away, I sink down on a patch of grass. The base has continued with Ryan’s seeding plan. From what I’ve seen, over half the base has grass which is a vast improvement from the dusty brown dirt which previously covered the grounds.

I pretend to search through my music list. Giving Ryan privacy is easier said than done. I can’t hear the actual words of their conversation, but I can detect the tone. Kelly sounds confused, and Ryan sounds reassuring. Using my peripheral vision, I watch Ryan pry her off of him. Then, he makes a gesture. The next thing I know, the two of them disappear around a corner. Jealousy and panic creep through my veins, but I don’t follow them and force myself to take deep breaths until I relax a bit. I need a distraction and maybe a bit of cheering up. I pop in my ear buds and select an a cappella rendition of The Elements.

By the time Ryan reappears, I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve played the song though I’m convinced I’ll be reciting the periodic table in my sleep. Ryan looks upset, but what else would he be? I certainly don’t look forward to breaking up with Brody.

“Is everything all right?” I hesitantly ask.

Ryan’s voice is shaky. “No. Of course it isn’t.” He links his hands behind his head and stares at the ground. After a long silence, he says, “Do you mind visiting Jake and Molly on your own? I just need some time alone right now.”

Yeah, I do mind
. I don’t want to look as disappointed as I feel. After weeks spent in quarantine, first wondering if he was even alive and then never having a moment of privacy, seeing Kelly curled around him is too much. I want to be with him, but I also don’t want to be a selfish, clingy girlfriend.

“Sure,” I say nonchalantly. “No problem. I’ll let Jake and Molly know you’ll catch up with them later. Do you want to meet up later for lunch or dinner?”

“Nah, don’t plan your day around me. Just go and enjoy seeing everyone again. I’ll catch up with you later.” He continues looking down. I know if I see his face, I won’t be able to leave him. Before I change my mind, I squeeze his hand and make my way toward the field labs.

I decide to stop at the supply store. I’ve been without lip balm for weeks, and I deserve a treat. Besides, the store’s on the way to the field lab. The same giggly clerk that I first met in the store stands behind the counter, and an oversized, gaudy ring adorns her finger. The store’s been reorganized since my last visit and no longer has the haphazard look of a mom and pop store. Everything is neat and organized, but I can’t find any lip balm or even lip gloss. Like it or not, I have to deal with the clerk. I just know she’s going to make me listen to the story of her engagement, and I just don’t have it in me to
ooh
and
ahh
when every fiber in me tells me these engagements are a horrible mistake.

I approach the counter. “I’m looking for lip balm.”

The girl blankly stares at me. Finally she asks, “Plain or cherry?”

“Plain,” I mumble hoping to keep conversation to a minimum. Thankfully, the girl disappears into the back room. A minute later she returns, sets the lip balm on her side of the counter. I patiently wait for her to hand it over, but instead she drums her nails.

“Save your sob story,” she snaps, sounding nothing like the bubbly girl I remember. “Whatever it is, I’ve heard it before. If you don’t have the points, go find one of your friends to buy it for you.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I admit, feeling completely clueless.

“Were you just defrosted yesterday or something?” heckles the guy waiting behind me.

I take a deep breath. “No, I was just released from quarantine after being stranded in the woods for weeks.”

The clerk snaps her fingers at me. “I stand corrected. I guess I haven’t heard it all.” She slides a thin black box toward me. “If your story is true, then you have points.”

“Points for what?” A trace of annoyance creeps into my voice. I assume the lack of an explanation means she doesn’t believe me.

The clerk sighs. “Points for all nonessentials. Too many people were being wasteful. They forced the base to implement a point system. Everyone is allocated the same amount each month to use on supplies beyond food and clothing. If a person is mindful of what they use, they have more than enough points for what they need.”

The girl’s tired voice tells me she’s given the spiel many, many times. She tilts the black box toward me, and I realize what it is. I lay my palm on the box and hear it emit a soft hum as it scans me.

The girl’s eyebrows disappear behind her bangs. “I haven’t seen that many points before.”

The guy behind me leans in. “You’re rich,” he says and whistles long and low.

Suddenly the two of them are looking at me as if I’m their new best friend. I pocket the tube of lip balm and hightail out of there before they start begging me to buy them stuff.

Instead of strolling directly to Jake and Molly’s, I decide to visit our old field lab. I feel nostalgic. The first set of doors sits flush with the perimeter fence. When I scan my palm on the small black box adjacent to it, I hear a click and open the door. But when I scan my hand for the interior doors, the computer rewards me with a bleep as if it’s annoyed with me. My access has been revoked. Maybe the lab is currently occupied. I peer through the double glass doors and search for any signs of activity, but all I see is the long hallway that leads to the kitchen area. Frustrated and angry, I go to the other field lab. I tell myself the people, not the building, are what made the lab so great, but I still don’t like the idea of strangers using my lab.

Just for the heck of it, I scan my palm for the interior door of Jake and Molly’s new lab and get the same annoyed beep. As I chastise myself for not bringing a walkie-talkie, a girl opens the lab door. I recognize her from the woods. She’s tall, almost six feet, with a warm smile that lights up her amber eyes. I like her instantly.

“You’re the girl from the flood.” Her quiet and sweet voice doesn’t match her size. “I’m glad to see your color’s back to normal. It’s Brett, right?”

“Yes, that’s me.” I realize I never got her name when we first met in the field. I hold out my hand.

“I’m Gabriella,” she says and gives my hand a dainty shake. “It’s nice to officially meet you.”

“Gabby, who is it?” I immediately recognize Elliot’s annoyed bark. A moment later, he appears by Gabriella’s side. “Oh it’s you.”