Connected (66 page)

“
Kaitlyn, I just can’t afford for you to leave right now. I need to go into work in the coming weekends to prepare for several big upcoming meetings. Work is just more important than some silly girls retreat right now.”

“
That’s the problem, Michael. Your work. Our lives revolve around your work. You always put your work before your family.”

“
My work pays the bills! Last time I checked, dishes and laundry don’t pay the bills.”

“
That’s just it, Michael. Dishes and laundry don’t pay the bills, nor do they create a fulfilling life! I’m worth more than just being slave for this family! Do you know how depressing it is when your daily goal in life is to sweep up Goldfish off the floor and dig rocks out of pants pockets before throwing them in the washing machine? I feel like I’m in solitary confinement most of the time. And then my husband comes home and carries his plate of supper into his office only to disappear for hours on end, coming to bed well after I’ve gone to sleep. That happens so often these days that sex is not even in our vocabulary anymore. I’ve spent the last five years in this unfulfilling life, wiping asses and noses, sweeping crumbs off the floor, and passing a practically nonexistent husband occasionally in the hallway!”

Five years of pent up frustration barreled its way out of me in harsh tones and salty tears.

“
We all need a break sometimes, Kaitlyn. Don’t you dare think you are the only one sacrificing your needs and wants for this family. I make sacrifices too!”

“
Oh, really? You laugh it up with your coworkers at your lavish dinner meetings eating filet mignon with lobster tail and drinking $300 bottles of wine while I sit at home eating chicken nuggets for the third time in a week. When Eli was a baby, you played your endless golf games and slept soundly in your luxurious hotel rooms while I sat at home breastfeeding until my nipples were raw, and spent my nights cleaning up explosive diapers! I never realized those fringe benefits at work were considered sacrifices for you! Please forgive me if I was mistaken!” My seething comments oozed with sarcasm.

Michael glared at me under furrowed eyebrows. He wanted to say something, but refrained. Instead, he just huffed and stomped to his office, slamming the door behind him.

I stared at his office door, half expecting him to open it back up and say whatever it was he seemed to want to say. But, it remained closed. I could already hear him pecking away at his keyboard on his computer. What had happened to us over the past few years? It’s not that we hated each other. We were still cordial most of the time, but our marriage had become stale, stagnant, and downright boring. We worked great together as a team to run a household and raise a child, but most of the time I felt like we were just roommates passing each other in the bathroom, taking turns using the sink. Our conversations used to be interesting and compelling. Now, it seemed the only thing we discussed was whose turn it was to put Eli to bed. His office was his sanctuary, and my nose stayed in a book.

Slowly, I turned around and walked away from his closed office door, in search of my e-reader with its newly downloaded novel.

“
If you really want to go, then go. I can rearrange some things at work,” he muttered later that night as I lay in bed scouring the beach resort pamphlet that had come in the mail that afternoon.

“
You have no idea how much I need this,” I sighed.

“
Then go, enjoy your weekend. I’ll do what I can to make it work,” he grumbled.

With that, he grabbed the blanket and rolled over to go to sleep.

I felt slightly guilty that he would have to rearrange his schedule, but not guilty enough to stay home. I deserved this break. I
needed
this break before I completely lost my mind.

So, here I was at the beach taking advantage of my much needed getaway, while Michael and Eli probably enjoyed a Classic Burger from Burger Land. Eli would be overjoyed with the idea of a Junior Meal for dinner. He had been begging for one of the new Space Deputy toys for a week.

“
Hello?”

“
Hey, sweetie,” I cooed.

“
Hey, Mommy,” Eli said happily, “Guess what? I got the new Captain Neptune toy tonight!”

I laughed. “I figured Daddy would take you to Burger Land.”

“
Yeah, and it’s so cool, Mom!”

“
I bet,” I agreed.

“
Wanna talk to Daddy?” Eli blurted out, obviously too busy with his new toy to spend another second talking to me.

“
Sure, sweetie. Bye, I love you.”

“
Love you too, Mommy!”

“
Hey you, are you having fun?” Michael asked as he brought the phone to his ear.

“
So far I am. We’re going out tonight too. Karaoke, I think.”

“
Sounds fun. I hope you girls have a great time.”

“
Well, I guess I better go get ready for our big night out. I’ll talk to you later.”

“
Ok, goodnight. Talk to you later.”

“
Who’s ready for a night on the town?” Shannon called from the bathroom as she stood in front of the mirror adding the final touches of her makeup. Shannon had been a stay-at-home mom for the last ten years. The epitome of homemaking, she always left me envious of her organizational skills and her level head. Shannon always seemed to have it all together.

“
I know I am!” Tori yelled from the kitchen as she poured some vodka into her glass of orange juice. “I can’t remember the last time I’ve been out with the girls!” Without a doubt, Tori was the most physically fit mom of our group. Almost nothing prevented her from keeping her strict workout schedule at the local YMCA. She had muscle definition in places I couldn’t even imagine having muscles at all.

Together, we were excited to have a few nights of fun without catering to the needs of our families.

I sat with my back to the stage. I had immersed myself so deeply in the conversation that I barely noticed karaoke had ended and a band had started setting up on stage. My friends and I were laughing hysterically at the fools we had made of ourselves during our poor rendition of Aretha Franklin’s song, Respect. Downing a few drinks prior to our performance gave me the courage to embarrass myself on stage.

In the background, a voice emerged from the microphone.

“
Testing…one, two, three…Testing…”

The hair on the back of my neck stood upright. My body seemed to recognize the smooth and soothing voice, but my mind could not recall it.

I quickly spun around in my seat and stared at the figure on stage. We sat too far away from the stage, and the terrible lighting in the bar restricted my view.

“
What’s the matter, Kaitlyn?” Shannon sounded concerned. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“
That voice. It sounds so familiar. I’ve heard it before,” I stammered.

“
Honestly Kaitlyn, the sign on the door said this band is debuting tonight and besides, who do you know that lives at the beach?” Tori asked.

“
No one, I guess,” I sighed.

But, there was something about the voice that I recognized. I felt sure I had heard it before.

The mysterious voice began to sing and my thoughts drowned out the conversation around me. I dug deep into my memory grasping for any recollection I could muster.

Nothing sprang to my mind. But, that soothing melodic voice, crept up the back of my spine, tingling and sensuous, radiating through my chest. I just could not conjure up the face connected to the voice. The timbre resonated familiarity, but the perplexity remained.

“
Seriously, Kaitlyn, what’s gotten into you?” Tori looked at me wide-eyed. “You don’t look so good.”

I didn’t realize it until she said it, but my face felt flush and my palms felt sweaty.

“
I don’t know, guys. I just can’t explain it. I think I know the lead singer of this band. What was the band’s name again?”

“
Big Five, or something cheesy like that. Why?” Lisa piped up.

“
I don’t know. I just can’t place it…”

The voice on the stage mesmerized me. The face connected to the voice remained a mystery as the conversation swirled around me. I sat there and considered just getting up and walking toward the front of the stage to get a good look and quickly solve the mystery. But, to avoid looking like some desperate middle-aged groupie heading to the stage for attention, I stayed seated and half-heartedly listened to Tori drone on about her workout routine and her ‘clean eating’ diet.

Suddenly, the voice was behind me.

“
Kaitlyn?”

The girls at my table froze. Their eyes looked up at the mystery man standing behind me. I whirled around to see who caused my friends’ jaws to drop in awe. My breath caught in my throat while my heart immediately began pounding in my chest. A face from a long forgotten past stood in front of me.

His name immediately sprang from my lips, “Chris!”

“
Wow, Kaitlyn. I can’t believe it’s really you.”

“
Chris,” I said again almost breathlessly, “how long has it been?”

“
Eight years and five months, almost to the day,” Chris blurted without even taking time to think about it, as if he had been etching hash marks on his wall for each passing day.

“
Unbelievable,” I said with a hint of nostalgia as my mind tried to drift back to a time I had tried earnestly to erase from my memory. But, immediately I snapped myself back into reality.

“
What are you doing here?” I asked.

“
I live here. I write music by day, and play music by night. Our band is working on its first album….what…are you doing here?” Chris looked around the table. The girls stared up at him. I could not tell if they were ogling him because he was stunningly gorgeous, or if they were just shocked by the fact that another man, besides my husband, so obviously took my breath away. Deep down, I hoped they did not even notice my breathless anguish.

“
Oh wow, where are my manners?” I said, embarrassed. “These are my friends… Lisa, Shannon, and Tori. We’re here for a ladies’ weekend retreat.”

The girls continued to look up in awe. Chris looked as handsome as ever. His breathtaking physique defined itself beneath his tight black T-shirt. They sputtered and stammered their hellos, and he politely smiled. But, his eyes quickly diverted and caught my gaze. Those same dark eyes that melted my heart more than eight years ago were searching mine. I hoped my friends were not aware of the pounding in my chest. The awkward, yet intimate moment stirred emotions I had not felt in many years.

“
Well, I guess I better get back to the stage. The boys are ready to play again,” Chris smiled amiably at my friends. His eyes searched mine, and he beamed that same wide grin that once made my heart turn flips in my chest.

“
Ok,” I grinned back, trying to suppress the feeling that was welling up inside of me. “I’ll see you around.”

I watched Chris walk back toward the stage. Shaking my head in disbelief, I looked back at the girls sitting around the table. They all stared at me in wide-eyed astonishment.

“
What?” I blinked my eyes innocently.

“
Who. Was. That?” Lisa asked, emphasizing every word.

“
Oh, that was just a guy I knew from high school,” I shrugged indifferently.

“
No, Kaitlyn.” Tori remarked emphatically. “That was not
just
a guy.”

“
Yeah,” Shannon announced, looking over my shoulder, “Wow.” She stared in his direction, bewildered.

“
Guys!” I snapped. “Stop staring, ok? He really was just a guy I knew from high school….who I happened to be in love with at the time.”