Conquer Me (Sawtooth Shifters, #4) (9 page)

No big surprise that Emma and Shea ate the same kind of cereal. She had a field day with him, asking about all his tattoos, shrieking with laughter at his ridiculous answers. He fucking loved it. 

“First day at Forever Home. Wish me luck.” Shea left his bowl on the table when he headed out, tugging on Emma’s hair. “See you later, sweetie pie.”

Emma waved, and watched him go.  Cass sighed heavily, looking over to me. I nodded, knowing how much she didn’t want to do this. But it was never going to get any easier.

“Honey, I have to talk to you.” Cass swallowed hard. “About Daddy.”

Emma put down her spoon, squinting in confusion. She had to know something was up. “What about Daddy?”

Another deep breath. She patted Emma’s hair, not wanting to let go when she got to the bottom of the curls. “He‘s gone, baby. He went to—to Heaven.”

That was a stretch, but I would never point that out.

“Isn’t that where angels live?” Emma asked. 

“It is.” Cass sighed deeply. I put my hand on her knee and squeezed.

“Can we go visit him?” 

Cass shook her head. 

Emma raised an eyebrow, but the gravity of the news was starting to sink in. Her frown wobbled before she asked, “Is he coming back?”

Cass couldn’t answer, dissolving into tears. 

I picked up where she couldn’t. “He’s not, honey.”

Emma slumped in her chair, eyes glossing over with tears. Like we were last night, she was in shock. She narrowed her eyes at me. “Go away! I want my daddy! Not you.” She scrambled away from the table without giving me a chance to answer, but then dropped to her knees when she realized she wasn’t in her own home, and broke down.

Fuck.

**

S
taying away from Cass while she laid Walter to rest was torture. She needed me now more than ever, but there were some things she had to do herself. I couldn’t stand beside her at the memorial, or deal with his family.

She wasn’t alone. The people of the forest, the working class wolves that she’d grown up with, came to support her. And much to my surprise, me, too. They knew what we meant to each other. So many of them told me how good it was to see Cass in the forest again. In death, there were new beginnings. And the wolves around us saw hope.

“I want to move back to the forest,” Cass said, looking around the living room of the house she’d shared with Walter like she didn’t know where she was. Everything was disheveled from having so many people pass through, and Cass either didn’t have the energy or care enough to put it back together. “What everyone did for me this week, after I abandoned them—“

“You didn’t abandon anyone.” I sat behind her, sliding my hand around her back to pull her in to me. Cass sighed, resting her head on my shoulder. “You were taken away. We barely have contact with any of the women, unless they’re our mothers or sisters.”

“That’s the hardest part for me. Seeing the big picture. What the arranged marriages are actually doing to the forest. Every night this week, I’ve dreamed about my old house. It wasn’t perfect there, but nothing ever is. That’s what I want Emma to learn.”

“You’re a good mom.” I kissed her forehead. 

“I’m trying,” she said. We both watched Emma, playing with a train set on the floor. She’d taken the track apart and was in the process of reconstructing it. “I’m going to talk to our lawyer. He’s Walter’s lawyer, so I don’t know how it will go, but I want to buy Emma out of her contract.”

I pulled her into me. “That’s the bravest thing any woman I know has ever done.”

“Or stupidest.” She shuddered against me. “I’m scared for her, Major. If I do this, there’s a chance she could be alone forever. There aren’t many unpromised boys her age, and I don’t want her to be ostracized for my decision. I’m not sure what the right answer is.”

Emma, hearing her name, crawled between us on the couch. She looked up at me, suspect.

“Giving her a choice is the right answer.”  I held my hand out to Emma. She hesitated, but wrapped her fingers around mine. I wiggled my fingers, and she giggled. “Hey, it’s almost bedtime. What do you say about letting me read you a story?”

She looked to her mother for confirmation. A glimmer of fear flickered on Cass’ face. She still expected her daughter to reject her, to choose her father over her. But Emma wouldn’t do that, now that no one was actively trying to steer her away from her mother. Cass nodded, her smile wobbly.

“Okay,” Emma said.

I kissed Cass before following Emma up to her bedroom. “I know exactly which one I’m going to read her. The one that my parents read to me, when the wolf finds her mate.”

C
ass

It wasn’t Walter’s bed anymore. I had to keep reminding myself that. And we never really shared it, or anything else for that matter.

“I’m afraid Emma doesn’t like me.” Major stripped off his shirt as soon as he came in the room, distracted.  He couldn’t have felt very comfortable in Walter’s house either. This wouldn’t be our home. I planned on selling this place as soon as I could.

I had a completely fresh start and I wasn’t going to waste any of it.

“She would’ve never let you read to her if she didn’t like you. Believe me, she’s not shy with her opinions. She’s testing you.”

Major smirked. “Wonder where she learned that from. Smart girl.”

“She is. Think of how confused we feel. Imagine what’s going through her head.” She still asked about Walter, and Connie. I had to figure out what I was going to do about the nanny. It wasn’t fair for Emma to lose everything all at once. Maybe Connie wouldn’t be so insufferable without Walter. And she did love Emma, even if she had a terrible way of showing it.

“I don’t want her to resent me, thinking of me as an absence of her father. Or that I took something away from her. It’s important to me, Cass. I want Emma’s respect.”

I couldn’t fall any more in love with this man if I tried.

Major continued to search the room. “What are you doing?” I asked. I got out of bed, running my hand over his bare arm. I loved the way his muscles felt. Always a little tense, ready to pounce.

Now I had his attention. Major turned into me, moaning when he saw my outfit. Or lack thereof. I’d stripped down to my bra and panties. I loved good lingerie. It was one of the only things I could always do for myself, no matter what. Tonight I wore a black lace balconette bra with red satin trim, and always matching panties. I liked boy shorts best. With an ass like mine, thongs were out of the question.

“I like this.” He wound the end of the ribbon around his pinky finger. “I was looking for a lighter. And some candles.” 

I pushed against his shoulder. “I never quite pegged you as a romantic. Top drawer. Emma likes things that go boom, so I hide the explosives.”

Major laughed. “No wonder she likes Shea so much. As for the romantic thing, hardly. I’ve had a lot of time to think about fucking you, Cass. I like the idea of your skin bathed in firelight. Letting our animals run wild together.”

It was the most romantic thing I’d ever heard. My body throbbed at his words, and the only thing that would quell the sensation was to have his lips everywhere on my skin. “Is that a threat or a promise?”

“It’s a certainty.”

I hooked my fingers into the waistband of his jeans and jerked him toward me. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about fucking you, too.”

“Yeah?” The heat of Major’s body seared my skin. His hair hung in my face, beard moving against my cheek as he spoke. “Tell me about it.”

I never was very good at doing what I was told. Instead I ran my tongue along Major’s bottom lip, pulling back to see if he’d chase. He held his breath but didn’t move. I liked that even better. Going back in for more, I caught his lip between my teeth and pulled. A low sound vibrated from his throat, not quite a growl, that made my knees weak. This time he kissed me back, his tongue tangling with mine, fighting for dominance. He explored every bit of me, running his tongue hard along the inside of my lip. I melted in his arms, and not just from being so close to him. Being in this room, having someone so hungry for me, was overwhelming. This was a place I associated with shame and humiliation. With one kiss, Major erased every bad memory I had of this space, replacing them with a promise of the future.

I’d been so conflicted about saying goodbye to my old life. Walter always insisted I owed him something, and after twelve years, I started to believe him.

I would never be glad anyone was dead, but I was thankful Walter was gone. I walked a tightrope between the two, trying to balance my emotions.

Major sank to his knees, his eyes glowing with a fire that we needed no candlelight for. I followed down but he shook his head. “No. I want you just like this.”

Couldn’t argue with that. I straightened my stance. That firelight gaze bathed my skin as he tugged my boy shorts down my thighs. He kissed my bare hip, breathing deep before moving inward. He closed his eyes, lashes shadowing his cheekbones. There was a reverence about the way he moved. Major hadn’t been kidding—he’d thought this through.  He tapped my thigh, signaling me to open for him. I could only go so far with lace restraining my calves.

I balanced myself on his shoulders, digging my fingernails into Major’s flesh when his tongue hit my clit. He had to work for it at this angle, but this wasn’t a man who was used to having things come easy to him. Long, slow strokes sent electricity up my spine. I was embarrassed to admit that Walter had never done this to me. Even more embarrassed that he told me it was because I was dirty.

Major did not agree. His tongue curled around my clit. Little explosions rocketed through my body at the strange, welcome sensation. He moved with my body, licking, nipping, and sucking. I was spread as wide as I could go. He held me by the hips, keeping me steady but giving me no escape. Not that I was going anywhere. I couldn’t even if I wanted to. My top half was limp, my hair fell over his head, mixing with his. 

He let go of my hip and I swayed. Major would never let me fall. He gave me a moment of rest, kissing the line along my pubic bone. He picked up where he left off, his finger brushing the sensitive, swollen skin between my legs. I writhed under his touch, moving with him, guiding him. He rolled his thumb over my clit, hard and fast, not giving me a chance to build up to the sensation, he went straight for the explosive. I bit down hard on my bottom lip, wishing I could connect with his skin. I couldn’t scream, I’d wake Emma. But I needed some sort of release from this sensation. 

My orgasm was a slow, magnificent build. Major already knew my body better than I knew my own, chasing me as I writhed under his touch. He slipped two fingers inside me, and my inner walls clamped down on him, pulsing, welcoming him home. My knees gave out as I reached my climax. Major led me to the floor, positioning me in his lap, all while thrusting his fingers inside me. 

I needed his mouth. So many emotions flowed through me as I came down from the ecstasy of the orgasm and I needed all that Major had to give me. He was ready to rise to any challenge that I had for him, lips on mine, his fingers still inside me. The rhythm built back to a frenzy, Major’s fingers moving easily, slick from my release. My body barely had a chance to recover from its climax, and something slow and sinister was already building in my core.

This was amazing. How it was supposed to be. Two souls connecting in the flesh. Knowing what the other wanted without having to say a word, moving together in perfect fluidity.

I felt empty when Major let me go, but not for long. He brought his fingers to my mouth, and I sucked the taste of myself off of him. My head swam. Like everything else about us, it felt so wrong but yet so right.

“Get up on the bed.” Major’s whisper rumbled through me.  Gentle yet promising so much. The eye of the storm.

I had more trouble than I expected crawling onto the bed. My limbs had turned to jelly. Major gave my ass a hard whack. I turned around to find him with a wicked grin. The sting coupled with the empty ache of not having him inside me was something I didn’t expect.

“Do it again,” I said.

His eyes were on fire. “What’s the magic word?”

“Now.”

Major laughed, delivering another whack, this time to the other cheek. He followed me on the bed, hair hanging down over his shoulders, muscles straining, his beast rippling just below the surface of the skin.  I lay on my back, content to take in the view. He looked around the room, biting his lip.

“We don’t need the candles,” I said. Major lit up the room all on his own.

He shook his head, then stripped the pillow of its case. He took one of my hands, then the other, holding them over my head and looping the fabric around my wrists. It was a tight fit, getting everything bound to the headboard. Major tugged on the binding, making sure the connection was secure.

Holy shit.

I wasn’t sure how I felt about that. Mainly because I’d waited thirty-five years to have a night like this. It wasn’t our first night together, but it was the first one that didn’t have to be conducted under a veil of shame and secrecy. I wanted to experience everything Major had to offer. But to completely turn myself over to Major, bend to his will, was something I never expected.

His beard tickled my nipple. He ran his chin over it repeatedly, and the nub strained to meet him. I’d never been very ticklish, but I squirmed under his feather touch. Just when the sensation became too much to bear, he lowered his mouth, blowing hot air on the aching skin. I arched my back, moaning, wishing he’d take the bud in his mouth, suck on it, anything to alleviate the pressure he sent rushing through me. 

Major was in no hurry; after all, he’d thought this through. He circled the other nipple with his tongue, scraping his teeth against the tip. I gasped. Just the tiniest amount of pressure against the taut skin could rip me open, in more ways than one. He continued his slow, gentle play until I bucked below him, all the little lightning bolts zinging my nerve endings. 

God, I wanted to touch him so bad. To rake my fingers through his hair and push his head down to my throbbing core. Or put something else there.  His erection rested against my leg. Long, hard, and ready.  How could he be so patient?  I was ready to explode. But I loved the way he gazed at my body, like it was something he’d never seen before, taking his time and making sure everything was perfect.