Conquest ~ Indian Hill 3 ~ A Michael Talbot Adventure (57 page)

I would grieve for Dennis for a long time
,
I thought
,
but I would honor his death with a victory over the insurgents that the gods themselves would be proud of. Grandiose
,
I know, but that’s what I
felt
.

I touched Tracy’s flat belly. I didn’t feel anything and I didn’t know if it was even t
o
o early for her to feel anything
.
B
ut if she was lying
,
she picked the right time and the right thing to lie about.

“I know we need to talk
,
Paul and soon, but I need to see how Drababan is doing and I need to be alone for a little while. Is that alright?”

“We’ll meet back her
e
in five hours
,” Paul said
,
coming from behind his desk to give me a hug.

“I’ll see you then
,” I told
him. “You coming?” I asked Tracy.

“I need to talk to her about our evacuation plan. She’ll catch up with you later.”

I gave Tracy a small kiss and with a heavy heart
,
lightened somewhat by the baby, I headed
toward
the hospital area.

I almost passed Beth by I was so deep in my despair.

“I heard
,” she said
reaching out with her hand.

I almost broke down in that hallway, sincerity was etched in
her
face.
S
he couldn’t
be
this cunning, could she?

“Do you want to go talk about it
?” she asked
.

I never wanted to talk about it or even think about it again. I knew I would never be so lucky as for either of those things to happen. “I don’t
,
Beth
.
I’m going to check on Dee and then I think I’ll find out how many shots it takes to get to the bottom of a vodka bottle.”

“I don’t know how to say this so I’m just going to blurt it out
,”
Beth stated.

I waited, Beth seemed to be weighing whether or not this was a prudent cours
e of action.

“Do you really think Tracy is pregnant
?” she asked
.

It really took me a moment to process the
information
.
W
hy w
ould I even doubt Tracy’s words?

“I mean
,”
Beth continued, I think trying to make sure that I never got back on to firm ground. “It’s rather
fortunate
she is all of a sudden pregnant when I arrive.”

“I’m not sure if you’re arrival would have sparked a pregnancy
,” I said
,
thinking more along the lines of the act itself as opposed to a lie created to thwart the attentions of another.

“I think she’s threatened by me
,
Mike.”

“She doesn’t need to be
,” I said
harshly, wishing to extract myself from this sit
uation as quickly as possible.

Great
,
now I’d have one more thing to think about while I tried to drown my memories in fermented potatoes.

Beth looked visibly hurt at my words
.
I simultaneously wanted to tell her I was sorry and hold her close and to tell her to leave me alone.

“I know you’re lying to yourself
,” she said
defiantly. “And I’m pretty sure so is she. That seems like a pretty bad way for a relationship to get started
,” Beth said
heatedly.

“Beth
,
I don’t think either of us
need
s
to explain ourselves to you. Why are you not getting it? You told me ‘no’, I moved on. I don’t think it gets any simpler than that.”

“Not everything is black and white
,
Mike!”
s
he was near to shouting. “I am the gray area and I am standing right here in front of you. I am telling you that I made a mistake and that I am willing to do anything to get you back!”

“Fuck!” I yelled
.
I was exhausted, I was grief stricken,
and
I was concerned for my friend
. Her badgering was relentless. I didn’t know how much more I could take.
“I can’t take this shit right now
,
Beth. I just lost my best friend, I have another friend in the hospital
,
and I’m about holding on by about this fucking much
,”
I yelled
,
my thumb and forefinger actually touching. She stepped back from the force of my words.

“Let’s leave this place
,
Mike
,
”
s
he forged ahead. “It’s like we’re waiting for death to find us here. We can start over somewhere new.”

“What’s wrong with you
,
Beth? Beauty can sometimes shield you from some of the worst things in life but it shouldn’t make you ignorant. Where do you think
we
could go? Where would we be able to get this new mythical fresh start?
You’d be so willing to leave these people behind? Some of these people that are ‘waiting for death’ are my family and friends.”

“You’re upset.
I’ll talk with you later
,” she said
turning to leave.

“I wish you wouldn’t
,” I said
heading to where I had originally intended
to go
.

Dee was sitting up in a bed especially designed for him. “Ahhh
,
Michael how are you doing?” Dee asked lightly before he got a closer look at my face. “You have not received good news about your friend then
?”

“He didn’t make it
,” I told
Dee
,
pulling up a chair.

“I would like to say that he died valiantly in the salvation of others, but your tone and set tell me that any consolatory words I utter will be misconstrued and thrown back at me with anger.”

“Dee
,
if we get through this
,
I really think you should go into psychiatry.”

“It would almost be too easy with your species
,” Dee replied
.

“Was that a joke?” I had to ask.

“Not at all. I am sorry for the loss of your friend, he was a brave man. There is nothing in those words that can be used against me in an argument
,
yet I feel the truth of them has lifted your heart a bit.”

“How you doing?” I asked
,
changing the subject. Dee’s uncanny ability to read me or any human for that matter was unsettling and I
didn’t feel like letting him read chapter two of what I was feeling.

“I will allow the conversation to be steered away from what ails you
, Michael.
P
erhaps we will revi
sit it when you’re ready. Your
doctors don’t understand my physiology as well as I would like them to, but they are all in agreement that I should be fine as long as I do not get an infection.”

“Our antibiotics won’t work on you?” I asked.

“No,
but they are checking your storeroom for any pet medications they feel might help.”

“Makes sense
,” I said
. “I’d hate for you to be my pet
;
man can you imagine the size of the mess you’d leave behind at a park
?
”

“I don’t see the humor
,” Dee said
flatly.

“No,
but I do
,” I told
him. “How long until you’re up and about?”

“This is the most comfortable bed I’ve had in over a month
.
I think that I would like to lie in it for a few more hours.”

“No,
rush
Dee
.
E
njoy yourself, you’ve earned it.”

I left Dee and thought
to
seek out my brother
.
I
nstead I found myself inexplicably drawn to Dennis’ quarters. As an officer
,
he was afforded one of the few rooms that actually had a door. It was locked
,
but that was more of a challenge than an obstacle. I rifled through my pockets until I came across something I thought might work
.
I
t was a library card from the Walpole
L
ibrary
S
ystem
that
I had carried with me almost always after
the fiasco with Spindler’s car.
I considered it a lucky charm. I wish
ed
I had let Dennis borrow it.

The door opened
and
I got a sideways glance from a few people
walking
down the hallway
,
but no one stopped me or called me on it. I slid in and quickly shut the door as if I were doing something illegal. Technically
,
I was, but I
didn’t
think anyone would really care. I still didn’t know what I was doing
t
here. A small envelope was lying on Dennis
’
pillows. A chill rippled up my spine
.
I
t had my name on it.

“Is this a fucking joke?” I asked, looking around, expecting someone to jump out from some hidden partition. Nobody did
and
I moved hesitantly over to the white rectangle. I reached out
,
convinced I was going to get shocked as soon as my hand made contact. I felt an electricity as I grasped the cool paper but I
thought
that had more to do with an overactive imagination. I ripped the seal, it sounded loud in my ears
.
I wanted to
leave
,
something did not feel right. Instead
,
I read the small note.

‘I’m glad you made it Mike. I knew you fucking would.
It’s always been about you
,
buddy. Even when Paul and me were building this place it was always about you. When you disappeared
,
I never dou
bted that I would see you
again.
T
here’s always been something about you
,
my friend. I wasn’t jealous
,
but somehow your light
always burned brighter than those around you. I often wondered how someone could glow so intensely and not burn out. You draw people to you, they can sense something too.

‘
I followed you out today because I
had
to. Not by Paul, something higher
,
bro. I know, I know, you think I’m crazy,
but I found out about your baby and I had to make sure that baby's father came home. My friend you saved my life once consider this a returning of the favor, I've loved you like a brother for years. I will hold a spot for you on the other side. I had a premonition
I wasn’t going to make it and that I should write this note. So I guess
,
buddy
,
if you’re reading this, the
premonition
was right. And I’d do whatever I did again man, because from day one you were my friend. There I was a Yankee fan deep in Red Sox territory and you didn’t give a shit.

‘
Don’t grieve too much for me
. I knew what I was getting in
to and I did so willingly, however all this shit turns out
,
you are th
e cog on which this whole thing
turns
. I’ll be watching
,
so don’t let me down and I’ll save a spot wherever the hell I end up.
I should probably scratch ‘hell’ out. Good luck
,
Mike
,
I love you bro.’

“I love you too
,
Dennis
,” I said
through tear
-
blurred eyes. I carefully folded the note back up and put it back in the envelope and then into my back pants pocket. My heart was simultaneously lifted and dragged down, it was a strange sensation. My goal had been to get absolutely blitzed on some cheap
homemade
booze
.
T
hat
feeling had passed.