Conspiring (4 page)

Val doesn’t waste much time. She whispers, “I think you’re in love with him, Roni.” Nudging my shoulder, she continues, “And what sucks about this situation is that you are willing to settle for less than you deserve because of it.”

I turn and glare at her. “I
am not
in love with him,” I hiss. Glancing back to my backyard, I remember the same thought popping into my head yesterday. How is that even possible? I shake my head disapprovingly. I tap Val’s leg as I get up and give her a playful smile. I have got to snap out of this sour mood and like five minutes ago. That’s not going to happen if I continue to sit here and discuss this with her. Discuss
him
. “I’m going to go take a shower. No more Bradley talk, please, or we’ll spoil our fun. I’m sure you’ll make yourself at home.”

She hops up and makes her way to the kitchen. “Got any chocolate?”

I bust out laughing continuing to walk towards my room. “Do
I
have chocolate?”

“Yeah, stupid question, huh?” Val hollers back.

“Right. The candy jar is in the same place it’s been for the past two years.” I grab the door frame to my room and lean back into the hall. “Oh and there are new juicy gossip magazines in the guest bathroom.”

“Ah, well take your time then. No, seriously, hurry your cute perky tush up!”

Chapter 3

After I shower and get dressed, I am feeling a little better. Maybe Val was right about just needing some coffee and medication. My headache seems to have subsided, but I’m still really tired. I swear I feel like I could crawl back into my bed and sleep for the rest of the day. When I walk back into the living room, Val is curled up comfortably on my sofa reading
US Weekly
.

I can’t help but laugh. “So, which celebrity is fake preggers this week?” I ask.

Val startles and quickly tosses the magazine on the side table. “Geez, you scared the crap out of me.” She puts her hand on her chest and takes a couple of deep cleansing breaths with her eyes closed. She looks like she’s in yoga or something. I can’t help but smirk. She starts to answer as she even opens her eyes. “You know? The usual. Jennifer Aniston is pregnant with twins. Oh, and Taylor Swift has another break up to write a song about.” She stops when she opens her eyes back and gets a glimpse of me. She looks at me like I’m crazy.

“What?” I ask as I shrug my shoulders.

“We’re just going shopping.” Her brows furrow as she points to me. “You’re wearing
that
?”

I’m wearing a charcoal gray strapless ruffle top with a sash that ties in a bow with black shorts. I’m not even really wearing heels.

I glance down shrugging my shoulders. “Yeah, what’s wrong with it?”

I don’t see any problem with what I’m wearing. If I did, I would have chosen something else. It’s not appropriate for me to wear to court, but it’s also not really dressy enough to even wear to Joe’s. I thought today would be the perfect day to wear it.

“How do you manage to look so fancy even in casual? You’re so preppy, you skinny little thing.” She walks over and hooks her arm in mine. “C’mon, let’s go!”

“Whatever. Let me grab my keys.” I walk to the key hanger by my door and they aren’t there. I never just leave my keys sitting around.
Dang, where did I put them
?
What is my problem
? I am definitely not myself today.

Val is cutting me no slack. “Did hell just freeze over? Because you always put your keys…”

I don’t even have to say a word. It’s obvious when I glare at her that she needs to shut up and quick.

I remember at that moment that I had thrown them on the kitchen counter when I came home last night. “Ah, I remember. Be right back.”

She motions for the door. “I’ll be in the car.”

I am thankful she had already started the car. There’s a heat wave going through Georgia and it’s so hot outside that I feel like I’m going to suffocate. The air is blasting in my face and I momentarily forget when I go to sit down how much leather seats that have been in the sun hurt on your bare legs. I grimace and suck in a deep breath. “Ugh, I hate summers in the south.”

I glance over to Val who is laughing at me. “So where are we going to shop today?” Val puts her shiny white BMW in reverse and pulls out of my driveway and glances over her shoulder to be sure none of the neighborhood kids are behind us. “Mall of Georgia or Discover Mills?”

I might normally care, but today I couldn’t care less. “You pick ‘Miss I Am Worried They Are Gonna Run out of My Size.”

“Yeah, they might. Mall of Georgia then if it’s my pick,” Val counters.

I glance at her appreciatively. If my heart could smile, it would right now. She makes me happy. I had forgotten how much lately. “Thanks for not letting me back out of this. I think I needed a day with you.”

Val smiles. “You’re going to have to be way more sick than you are to get out of a day with me.”

“Hey, penny for your thoughts? Better yet, I’d even give you a quarter,” Val teases.

We’re on our way back to my house from shopping. I can barely keep my eyes open. I continue looking out of the passenger side window trying to stay awake. “I’m just so tired. In a funk or something,” I reply.

“Bradley being gone?”

Just as I’m about to shrug, Val’s phone rings. I am almost relieved that maybe I don’t have to answer the question. I am so confused by all of these new emotions that I don’t know what to think. I don’t know if it’s him, if it’s whatever bug I seem to have, or the fact that I am a creature of habit and him being gone has my schedule all whacked up.

I realize that it’s Alex on the phone. I’m really surprised he had not called sooner. My guess is like a typical guy, he’s calling about food, which reminds me that I’ve barely eaten anything all day. I don’t have an appetite at all. Val and I ate lunch at the mall and all I did was play with my food the entire time. Anyone who knows me knows that I play with my food when I’m done. I guess it’s a nervous habit, boredom. Who knows? It drives my parents crazy because they raised me better than that. Our fine china might have been Corelle, and there wasn’t money for social. But my parents did make sure that I learned manners and etiquette. I don’t even realize I’m doing it, though.

“Veronica,” Val shouts.

I glance over to her as I fidget with the sash that is tied around my shirt. “Yeah?”

“Snap out of it over there.”

I smile and try to act more myself, but it’s just not there. I have no clue where my usually bubbly personality has escaped to today. But, I have a feeling that a large reason for its absence is a certain man who is currently preparing for a wedding in Charleston.

Val once again interrupts my thoughts. “So, that was Alex on the phone. One of the guys at the station called out and he’s going to have to work tonight.” She beams and her voice gets higher as she continues, “You know what that means, right?”

I do know what that means. I know that means that instead of getting to go home and go back to bed like I’ve wanted to do all day, Val wants to go to dinner and go clubbing. I try to perk myself up. I cannot let Bradley have this much influence over me, even when is five hours away. I think what is bothering me more than anything is that in the past I’d never been so forthright about wanting to go anywhere with him. I put myself out there and he not only rejected me, but he vocalized his lack of commitment. And while I thought I was okay with the lack of commitment from him or anyone for that matter, I’m not. I know that if I were in his arms right now, I’d be feeling totally different. Even if I had a cold, he would make me feel better. I’m putty in his hands and he knows it. Even if I want more, he knows I’ll never walk away. I shake my head and close my eyes realizing that I really think I might be in love with him.

“You don’t know what that means?” Val says confused.

“No. I mean yes, I know what that means. Val I am so tired, though.” I pull myself out of my trance and glance back at her. “I can either go to dinner with you and not go clubbin’…” Val looks over at me like I’ve grown an extra head. “
Or,
I can go home and take a nap, and then meet up with you later.”

Val’s hands quickly leave the steering wheel as she moves them up and down like balancing scales. “Eating dinner or getting drunk. Hmm, tough choice.”

I tilt my head and give her my most condescending look. “Would you put your hands back on the wheel!”

Val busts out laughing. “You most definitely need to loosen up tonight. I definitely think we should screw dinner. I’m sure you’ll have no problem getting plenty of guys to buy our dinner and drinks later.”

I can’t help but grin, and then go back to staring out of my window. Suwanee is beautiful this time of year. There are Crepe Myrtles along the streets. All of the trees are in full bloom. Flowers are everywhere. I say I hate summers in the south, but really I find the scenery so pretty.

We’re almost back to my house and I am thankful in a way that Val chose option two, which means I can take a nap. I hope when I wake up that I’ll have the energy to go back out with her. Even if I don’t, she’s not going to take no for an answer. My lips curve up as I think about how much I love her and how much I know she loves me. It’s not like she’s totally inconsiderate of my physical well-being. I know she just misses me. And she knows me better than anyone. Hell, she knows that a large part of this funk is him. I’m sure she’s just trying to be the perky best friend and keep my mind off him. I really am just bummed that I have felt like this all day. Damn Bradley.

Chapter 4

I look over at the clock and wonder how long I have been asleep. It’s too soon after waking up to see if I feel any better. All I know is that I just want to go back to sleep. I decide to stay in bed a little longer. I know I need to be getting ready to go back out with Val, but I’m so tired. I feel like my limbs are weighted down with those lead jacket things they make you wear if you have an x-ray. Maybe if I can wake myself up more then I’ll feel better.

My thoughts immediately go to everything that has happened this past week. I find myself playing the conversation from Wednesday with Bradley over and over in my head. I pull the covers up and snuggle into my pillow. I have been so emotional since then, mainly frustrated and pissed off at the world.