Conspiring with a Rogue (35 page)

“
No.” He would not discuss his affairs with her. That was not what they were here for. He was not putting himself through hell trying to seduce her so she could give him money or offer business advice.

She sighed, a burst of her breath tickling his neck. “Are you really so stubborn that you would rather lose everything than ask for help?”

He turned toward her slowly and was struck by how earnest she looked. How did she manage to appear so caring when she really did not care one damn bit? It didn’t matter that she might have left, because she felt she was a burden. If she truly loved him, she would have talked to him. No, it had been far too simple for her to leave. He struggled to collect his thoughts, aware she watched every twitch, every blink, every breath. “I’m exactly that stubborn.”

“
I suppose you are,” she said in the saddest voice. She heaved a great sigh, her breasts almost spilling over the top of her gown.

“
God,
you’re so beautiful,” Drake muttered before he could silence the thought. He couldn’t stand just looking at her and not touching her one minute longer. He delved his hands into her hair and crushed his mouth against hers. He wanted to devour her, consume her, leave his taste in her mouth for Johnnie-boy to know she had been claimed.

She fought him for a moment, pushing against him and twisting, but then her hands were pulling him toward her and her mouth opened wider, her tongue tangling with his, her lips sucking greedily at his own.

He backed her toward his desk and swept everything away. Papers, pens, books flittered through the air and crashed to the floor. He lifted her onto the desktop.

She broke the kiss with an exclamation. “What are you doing?”

“
Seducing you.” He pulled her costume down to bare her breasts.

“
We shouldn’t,” she whispered.

He took her nipple in his mouth and sucked on the bud until it was hard.

“
We can’t,” she said, pressing closer to him.

Without a word, he slid his fingertips over her breasts, then down toward her taut belly, pulling the material of her dress down as he went. She shivered under his touch.
Good
. Let her tremble as he did. His need for her was primal, uncontrollable. He’d never wanted anything more in his life than to take her, make her his, even fill her belly with his seed. She would never forget him then.

He circled her nipple slowly with one hand as the other raised her dress up her thighs until he touched the cotton fabric of her undergarments. He released her breast and slid both hands under her bottom to slip off her drawers.

Her hand came to his. “We mustn’t.”

“
Shh.” Drake pressed a finger to her lips. “This will be the last time for us. You had your goodbye; let me have mine.”

A bittersweet expression flittered across her face, gone so fast, he almost believed he’d imagined it. Without a word, she parted her thighs.

His heart thundered as he removed his own clothes and came between her warm legs. Revenge was his for the taking.

A warning shot through him.

If he had her again, could he really let her go?

He pressed the length of his hardness to her moist entrance. Their gazes locked, and he delved inside her, silencing the warning in his head, living only for the moment, not caring about the pain that would come later.

Caught in a haze of passion, under Drake’s expert hands and silken tongue, Whitney’s common sense fled. Drake pulled her face toward his as he slid in and out of her in a slow, driving rhythm. “God, Whitney…”

The need in his voice made her shake. Her mind knew only one thing, recognized only one thing. She had to fulfill his need. It was too late to stop, too late to turn back. As if he sensed the war within her, his mouth returned to her breast, suckling until she thought she would scream from the pleasure.

He nudged her legs wider and whispered against her neck, “Wrap your legs around me, love.”

She obeyed without question, and as soon as she did, his hands slid under her buttocks and gripped her as he moved, entered, and retreated with long, deliberate strokes. A searing need built within her, causing her to move one hand around his back and tangle the other in his hair to bring his mouth to hers. She kissed him frantically, wanting more, desperate for the moment to never end.

His strokes became faster, harder, frenzied. “Let me love you.” His voice was a harsh whisper.

“
Forever,” she responded, wanting at the moment only to satisfy her heart’s desire and the need to ride the wave lifting her up. She clenched her thighs, her belly, the very core of her being. Intense pleasure filled her, sent tremor after tremor through her.

Drake’s grip tightened until his own body shook, and he moaned. His body relaxed, and he crushed Whitney to him as he lowered them both to the ground and settled at her side on the hearth rug. He slid his arm under her and drew her to his chest. She rested her head there and listened as their hard breathing filled the room. After a few moments, their breathing quieted, and the thump of their pounding hearts echoed in her ears and reverberated through every part of her body.

Drake stroked her back, his chin resting against the top of her head. As desire ebbed, the knowledge of what she had allowed to happen filled her with guilt and misery. She clenched her teeth and tried to ignore how cold she suddenly felt, but her body began to shiver. Drake’s arms wrapped tighter around her. “Should I get a blanket?”

“
No,” she managed to whisper. How could she have been so careless, so stupid, so selfish? The seduction should have taken longer, but she was no match for her own desire for this man. And her weakness now threatened to cause him even more pain. He wanted a declaration of love, because he had convinced himself he wanted revenge. But his tender touch and his plea to let him love her told her differently. He loved her, and if she told him in return, he would never stop searching for her when she disappeared again. She could not allow him to waste his life on her when they could never be together.

She scrambled to her feet and found her dress. “I have to go,” she blurted, not caring how her voice cracked, not caring how obvious her distress must be. She wanted to get out of here before he asked her—

He caught her hand and held her still. “Do you love me?”

She blinked away the tears burning in her eyes and looked down at him. She wished to heaven she hadn’t. His gaze shone with love for her. Need for her. Her heart ached with the knowledge of what she had to do. “No.”

She wrenched her hand free and turned away toward the window to stare blindly into the garden, her head pounding so fiercely, pinpoints of silver light danced in her vision. She must never let him touch her again. If she did, she would likely throw herself at his feet, wailing and howling her love for him. Her plan had been stupid, foolish. To think she would sacrifice his future for her own selfish desires made her ill. She fastened her gown and stiffened her shoulders. “Please, let me go.”

He stood, and the noise of whispering material behind her indicated he was dressing. She was afraid to turn around, afraid whatever strength she had left would desert her. His arm brushed hers as he moved past her toward the door. She watched him, suddenly afraid he would leave and she would never see him again, but he stopped and turned toward her, his face etched with pain. “Why are you denying how you feel? Your voice shakes every time you deny loving me.”

“
I don’t love you,” she said coldly. “You’re mistaking my guilt for love. The moment the passion fades, guilt sets in. I
desire
you, I do not
love
you. They’re not the same.”

The pain in his face disappeared, replaced by a mask of cold indifference. He stared right through her, and she understood what it meant to die inside. She disgusted him. She saw it in the rigid set of his jaw, the flare of his nostrils, the resolute way he refused to even glance at her.

She’d gotten what she wanted, and she hated it.

“
I’ll send Dithers in to take you home.” Drake didn’t look at her as he turned and walked out the door.

“
Drake!” She ran toward the hall, almost stumbling in her haste. She reached toward him as he turned, but forced herself to not fling herself into his arms. “I’m sorry,” she offered, acutely aware of how little her apology meant after all he had suffered. She wanted to tell him she was sorry for being weak, sorry for not making him stop, and sorry for allowing their lives to intertwine again when she had known how painful it would be. None of the words could be spoken. She could not show the slightest crack in her emotions, lest he guess her true feelings.

“
Don’t be sorry. You did tell me you loved Johnnie-boy, but I didn’t believe you.”

“
Do you believe me now?” she asked, not sure she wanted to hear his response but knowing she must.

“
I believe you, and I’ll never touch you again.” His voice was devoid of all emotion and he looked at her as if she were a stranger. Without another word, he turned and walked away.

Though the desire to run after him almost made her ill, she forced herself not to move, not even breathe. She watched him until he rounded the corner and she could no longer see him. Then she fell limply against the wall, her eyes focusing on nothing as thoughts raced through her head.

She may well save his company, but at what cost to them both? She ruthlessly pushed the doubt away. He would fall in love again and have his dreams. Her nails bit into the tender skin of her palms. The cost was worth it. She would not allow her own desire for him to become the burden that made him sink, just as the burden of loving her had killed her mother and almost destroyed her sister’s future.

After a few minutes, the sound of shoes clopped toward her, and she pulled herself up to face Drake. She did not want him to see her distress. Drake’s coachman rounded the corner and tipped his hat to her, as if seeing her disheveled and half-dressed were not an uncommon occurrence. Disappointment and relief filled her that it was not Drake.

“
Mr. Sutherland bade me take you home,” the coachman said and averted his gaze.

“
Has he gone out?” she couldn’t help but ask.

Dithers smiled sympathetically. “I believe so, my lady. He said to tell you he’d be round to get you tomorrow with Mr. Rutherford to continue your investigation.”

“
Very good, Dithers,” she forced herself to say, though she wanted to laugh hysterically. If Drake planned to use Sin as a chaperone so they would not be alone together, they were in deep trouble. She had no doubt Sin would love to see her back home with Drake as her lord and keeper. Her cousin would disappear the first chance he got to help facilitate the matter. No. Sin would not do. She needed to enlist Sally’s help, though she hated to do so in her friend’s expectant condition.

“
Dithers, I’ll be just a minute.” She hurried down the hall toward the study. After a quick search, she found some paper and penned Sally a note, begging her to come to the town house in the morning. Whitney rushed back to Dithers and pressed the note into the coachman’s hand. “Take this to the Duchess of Primwitty’s home and see personally that she reads it.”

“
But, my lady, Mr. Sutherland told me to see you safely home.”

“
Do as I say.” Whitney filled her words with the cool air of authority her father had always used with the servants. “I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”

“
But, my lady―”

Whitney frowned fiercely until poor Dithers’s face turned crimson. “See that a hackney comes for me at once.”

“
To take you home?” Dithers eyed her suspiciously.

“
Yes,” she said, pleased it was not a lie. She
was
going home to change into Mr. Wentworth. Then she planned to go back to Madam Brouchard’s and find out if the lady had forgotten to tell Drake any important details that might lead them to Lillian more quickly. The sooner Whitney found her friend, the better it would be for everyone.