Conviction (The Cassano Series Book 4) (11 page)

Tara

While Zev participates in the sting against Noah, he insisted I wait at his condo for protection. I’m going out of my mind as I wait to hear from him. At eleven-thirty, I call Victoria.

“Has Adrian heard from Zev yet?”

“No, nothing. Are you OK?”

“No. I’m going crazy over here.”

“Why didn’t you tell me what Sanders did to you?”

“I thought you’d kill him.”

“If this wasn’t going down tonight, I would’ve found a way.”

“I know.”

“I’m so, so sorry, Tara. God, what you went through… I’m so pissed, but mostly I’m relieved you’re still alive. He’s had at least one woman murdered.”

“I know, and I’m sorry.”

“It was a stupid, stupid thing to do, but knowing how I feel about Adrian, I understand why you did it for Zev.”

“You do?”

“I would’ve done the same thing for Adrian.” I hear Adrian barking at her in the background. “He didn’t approve of that comment,” she adds.

“I guess not. Please, let me know if you hear from Zev.”

“Adrian says you’ll hear from Xavier first.”

“I hope it’s soon. Bye.”

Ending the call, I fall over on the sofa. I need this to be over. For my own peace of mind, I have to know Noah Sanders is behind bars.

My phone rings, so I grab it swiftly.

“I’m coming home, baby,” Zev says.

My hand flies over my chest. “Oh, thank goodness. Are you and Kruse OK? Tell me you’re not hurt.”

“Tara, calm down. Kruse and I are fine.”

“I’m so relieved, and I can’t wait to put my arms around you.”

“I’ll be home soon.”

Sadie

While I let Simon get some sleep, I sit in the living room and read the morning paper. It’s ten o’clock on Saturday, and I think he showed up from work about four this morning.

I see Victoria’s name on the screen of my phone, so I answer. “Hi.”

“Hi, how are ya?” she asks.

“Good. What’s up?”

“Is Simon with you?”

“Yeah, why?”

“I’m inviting you to lunch.”

“Today?”

“Yes, at noon at Adrian’s penthouse. Theo, Zev and my friend Tara are coming, too. Adrian wants his family together as this story breaks through the media, and he needs to talk to his brothers about something else.”

“Simon’s sleeping.”

“Sadie, this is important. I want you to meet Tara, too. She’s dating Zev, and it’s serious, so it would be good for you to get to know her.”

“OK, I’ll get Simon up soon.”

Tara

I’m silent as the elevator doors shut. We’re taking one up to Adrian’s penthouse. Having been in the parking garage of Submission and being on this elevator reminds me too much of my night with Noah.

The more I think about it, the more my body begins to tremble. My breathing becomes irregular, and I fear a full-blown panic attack is beginning.

The next thing I know, I’m up against Zev’s chest. He’s cradling my head and holding me securely, but I pull away. I need air. The walls are closing in around me. I feel it … they’re closing.

“Shit,” I say.

“Fuck! I’m such a dumbass.”

“Zev, don’t. I’ll be OK once I’m off of here.”

“I didn’t think, Tara, or I would’ve declined Adrian’s invite.”

“I said don’t. Just be quiet!” I snap as I fight to inhale. I hold my temples and stare at the floor. I can see one of Zev’s hands, and it’s in a fist. Our day is off to a great start.

I still can’t get air, so I lean my head back and attempt to take deep, slow breaths. The second the elevator doors open, I’m flying through them.

I barrel across the foyer, and once my feet hit the living room, my eyes dart around to all the faces staring back at me.

Thankfully, Victoria is already here.

“Bathroom. Can you show me where it is?”

She looks alarmed as she marches toward me.

“Are you OK?” she mutters.

“I will be. I’m having a panic attack.” She ushers me down the hallway to an enormous bathroom. Good. A lot of space in private where I can breathe.

“Thank you. I need to be alone.”

Victoria frowns and gathers me a washcloth.

“I’ll be right outside if you want to talk.”

Zev

“Is she OK?” Simon asks, approaching me. “You didn’t knock her up already, did you?”

I glare at my brother. “No, she’s having a panic attack because of that shithead Noah, and I’m a dumbass for not realizing it could happen.”

“Don’t beat yourself up, bro. You’ve had a lot on your mind.” His words don’t help me a damn bit because all I keep telling Tara is that she’s the most important thing to me, and I’m failing her already.

“Whatever. I’m a dumbass, and I better go check on her.” I tread down the hallway and find Victoria leaning against the bathroom door.

“I’ll trade you.”

“I think she needs space.”

“Then I’ll wait like you.”

Victoria pushes off the door and leaves me to take over. I do like I said I would and wait. And wait…

After ten minutes, I tap lightly on the door.

“You can come in,” she says softly. She’s sitting on the closed toilet seat, holding a washcloth over her neck.

“Are you OK?”

“I’m doing better.”

“I’m sorry. I can’t believe I didn’t think of it. I’ve practically lived here for years, so it didn’t cross my mind.”

“I know, Zev. Please don’t apologize again. I thought I could handle it, and maybe next time it will be easier.”

Going to her, I squat down and cup her cheek.

“Do we need to go home?”

She smiles, and it eases my nerves.

“You called it home like it’s ours. It sounded nice.”

“I feel like my condo is ours. You brighten the place up.” Now, I get her mega-watt grin, and I love it.

“Whenever you’re ready, we’ll go out there, and I’ll fix you a drink. It might help your nerves.”

“Jesus, everyone is going to think I’m crazy.”

“No, they’re not. You went through something traumatic to save my family. They’re only going to be empathetic and grateful.”

She sighs a long breath. “I’m sorry I snapped at you.”

“It’s forgotten.”

“I’m ready.” I lead her out of the bathroom by the hand, and I’ll hold it as long as she needs me to. The guys are busy talking in the living room, and I think I hear the girls in the kitchen. I go to the bar and pour a shot of bourbon in a tumbler and hand it to Tara.

“I’ll go find the girls, so you can be with your brothers.”

“Are you sure? I can go with you.”

“No, I’m good now.” She kisses my cheek. “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me. I feel like an ass.”

“Don’t, Zev. It’s OK.”

“What he did to you will never be OK, and I’m so thankful he’s behind bars, or I would probably hurt the man today.”

She frowns before she strolls away. I fucking hate that our relationship has to start off with her experiencing that nightmare.

“Zev, have a seat,” Adrian says. “I need to talk to you.”

“What now?” I grumble. “Do I need a drink of my own?”

“Probably.” After I’ve made another glass of bourbon, I take a chair and glance around at my brothers.

“What’s with the sad faces?”

“It’s Ma, Zev. She only has days to live,” Theo says. I don’t respond. The news stabs my chest. Regret, shame, love and heartache. It’s all wrapped around a sword that’s going through me, and it reminds me of my tattoo on my chest. It suits me now.

“What are we going to do?”

“Theo and I can’t leave until the funeral. Without Blanca’s help, we have too much work piled up, and we did see Ma recently. Your trip was cut short. We were thinking maybe you could go back and support Agatha. Simon can hold down the fort here.”

“OK, I’ll do it.”

“We also think it would be wise for you to get away for a bit after last night. We don’t know who’s working above Noah. What if they try to retaliate?”

“They’ll get a bullet in the face. I’ve had all the bullshit I can take,” I say. I’m struggling not to squeeze my glass into shards.

“Let’s watch the news,” Simon says. “I want the details on this bust.” He finds the remote and clicks on the television.

“Has anyone told Aggie about last night?” I ask.

“I did this morning. She was pissed at first, but she’s too distracted over Ma to stay mad,” Adrian says.

Simon finds the noon news, and they’re talking about the bust. “Eighteen search warrants were issued yesterday to suspected drug dealers in the city. Several kilos of cocaine, along with other drugs and weapons, were apprehended.

“Twelve people were taken into custody by the FBI, including Commissioner Shaw Sanders only son, Noah Sanders.

“Undercover agents were spread throughout the city late last night to bust Mr. Sanders and dealers under him in a coordinated sting by federal agents and the Drug Enforcement Administration.

“Due to Noah Sanders close relationship with the county commissioner, local police were left out of the investigation. Instead, FBI utilized hundreds of field agents and help from the DEA.

“Suspects are charged with conspiracy to distribute cocaine, heroin and marijuana, along with illegal firearms charges. These come with a minimum sentence of ten years to life,” the female news reporter states.

“Noah better get life,” I utter.

“This morning, the FBI thanked the US Attorney’s office and DEA for their vital help in this ongoing case. We will bring you more on this developing story as information becomes available.”

“Shit, if Victoria gets to keep her job it will be a fucking miracle. Her superiors are going to be pissed,” Simon says. In his usual fashion, he’s blurting out shit he shouldn’t. Adrian glares at him.

“That doesn’t concern you,” he says.

“Sorry, bro. All this shit is crazy.”

“I know, and I have a feeling it’s far from over. Noah is being arraigned Monday. We’ll have a better idea of what’s happening then.”

Tara

“Are you feeling better?” Victoria asks.

“Yes, much,” I reply before taking a sip of the drink Zev made me.

“Tara, this is my sister Sadie. Sadie, my friend, Tara.” I shake Sadie’s hand and admire her. Instead of appearing strikingly beautiful and tough like Victoria, she’s petite and adorable.

“You’re so pretty,” I say to her.

“Well, you’re gorgeous.”

My face heats with embarrassment as the two of them stare at me. “Thank you. I’m probably a sweaty mess right now.”

Sadie squeezes my hand and gives me a sympathetic look. I guess the entire family knows the sacrifice I made for Zev and his brothers.

Victoria was right. It was a stupid thing for me to do, but I still wouldn’t change it. Noah is in jail, and Zev is out of trouble. I would never go back and wish for a different outcome.

Zev steps into the kitchen, and with a tilt of his head, he signals for me to follow him. He leads me down the hallway and into a bedroom.

“What’s wrong?”

His hands glide down my arms, warming my skin.

“My mother only has days to live.”

“Zev, I’m sorry.”

“I need to go to New Jersey to be there for her and Agatha, but I don’t know if I can do it alone. I wouldn’t normally be this pushy, but please say you’ll go with me.”

I slide my hand up into his hair and stare into his eyes.

“Of course. I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.”

“You went to hell and back for me, and I feel like all I’m doing is taking from you.”

“All I want is for you to need me, Zev. Just love me.”

Zev stares at me for seconds, and I sense there is so much he wants to express. Instead he kisses me, and this kiss tells me everything his words couldn’t say.

Tara

“I’m so nervous.”

“Don’t be. They’re both going to love you.”

“You’re back!” Agatha exclaims as Zev and I walk through the door of his childhood home.

“I’m here, and I brought company. This is Tara. Tara, my sister, Agatha.”

“Call me Aggie, and don’t tell the others, but I’ve been the most excited to meet you. I knew if Zev gave his heart away it would be to someone pretty damn special.”

“Oh, well, thank you. That’s sweet.”

“How’s Ma?”

Aggie’s enthusiasm fizzles. “She’s still talking, but they think that will only be for another day or two. You can run the nurse out while you introduce Mom to Tara. I’ll warn you, though, she’s on morphine, so no telling what she’ll say.”

“Let me take our bags upstairs. Keep Tara company.”

“So, how did you meet Xavier?”

“Um, I was his employee, but I’m not anymore.”

“You cracked the code with him. How did you do it?” Aggie is forward, and it reminds me of Simon’s personality.

“He claims it’s the happiness I exude.”

“That’s exactly what Zev needs. Someone happy.” She grants me a genuine smile, and it eases my nerves.

“Are you ready to meet my mother?” Zev asks as he stomps down the stairs next to us.

“Oh, my gosh, I should’ve offered you something to drink. I’ll fix something while you talk to Ma,” Aggie says before she marches away.

I let out a breath and smile. “I’m ready as I’ll ever be.” Following him, we head down a hallway and into a bedroom.

His mother is in a hospital bed with the head raised. The television is on, but her eyes are closed as a woman in scrubs straightens the covers over her.

“Can we have a minute?” he asks the middle-aged lady. Zev takes his mother’s hand into his and moves hair off her forehead. “Ma, it’s Zev.”

Promptly, her eyes flip open, and she smiles at her son. I’m standing near the doorway, already feeling like I’m intruding on a personal moment.

He waves me over. “I want you to meet someone. This is Tara. Tara this is my mother, Denise.”

The woman’s eyes grow round and instantly have some brightness to them. “Hi, how–how are you?” Her words are strangled in her throat, but she finally gets them out.

Zev frowns, and I feel terrible for all this family is enduring at once. “I’m good, thank you.”

“Thank you, Xavier.” She gives him a knowing smile, and I wonder what she’s referring to.

“Tara’s all sunshine, Ma. She should brighten your day right up.” Zev strides over to the two windows and opens the blinds. “But we’ll give her a little help.”

Denise struggles to smile, but I see it as she stares at me.

“Pretty,” she says, choking after. Zev picks up a glass of water with a straw in it and gives her a sip.

“Maybe I should leave you two alone,” I say.

“Why don’t you stay, and I’ll go get us something to drink,” he replies.

“Uh, OK.” I take the spot next to his mother’s bed and smile at her. “You have a lovely home. I can tell it holds a lot of good memories.”

“Great ones.”

“I don’t know how you raised four boys. That had to be challenging.”

Denise starts to laugh but the sounds barely reach her lips. “Please take care of him.” Her smile is now gone, and she’s gazing at me.

We’ve shared few words, so I’m surprised that she’s going straight to the hard ones. I guess when you have little time, you don’t waste it.