Cool Down (33 page)

This book is intended to give advice and suggestions, based on observations and case studies. It's hard to be told what to do by someone you don't know, especially when things get personal, when family is involved. But in preparing this book, my mind often reverts to the story of the lawyer described in Chapter 9, who regretted his successful life due to its cost.

I am reminded also of a client of mine with whom I worked some years ago who had spent most of his early professional life, from age 25 to 40, circling the globe on behalf of his employer. Visiting district offices on every continent, and living out of a suitcase, he built a successful career that he then promptly walked away from.

I asked him why he did it. He told me it was the day he stayed home for a weekend to spend some time with his new infant daughter who was then six months old. As much as he tried, his daughter did not want to stay on his lap. She screamed to get off because she didn't know who he was. He could not feed her, pick her up, or even look into her eyes. She was too afraid—of her own father. Not shy, afraid.

That was the day he discovered that the cost of his career had become too great. He had to make a change, and that's just what he did. But he did not have to quit his job, nor take a sabbatical or even a cut in pay. All he had to do—all he did do, was to sit down with his manager and discuss where things had got to. He simply talked with his manager, who himself had been too busy to truly notice the recent increase in travel, and together they worked on a renewed, refined plan of operations, in which the needs of the company were met, yet which allowed for a more balanced, healthy lifestyle for my colleague.

When I first heard about and then researched the
Slow
movement, the various aspects of my persona—the engineer, the industrial psychologist, the teacher, the business owner, the parent—all demanded to know whether the concepts as described by the
Slow
movement's aficionados could be accepted in any form by the speed-loving, debt-plagued citizens of the Western world.

I have attempted to answer yes—we must adopt the principles of
slow
if we are to remain competitive, employable, and healthy, both collectively and, more importantly, as individuals. I have met many people who have already successfully adopted and adapted the principles of
slow
into their lives. They have shown me how they've been able to communicate better with their teams, close more sales, delegate, influence, become more creative, sleep better, eat better, maintain a healthy weight, connect with their families, expand their circle of friends and business acquaintances, build their career safety net, enjoy a balanced life, and much, much more, simply by introducing
cool down
concepts in careful increments; by planning carefully, communicating clearly, and encouraging a greater amount of human-to-human intellectual and emotional contact.

Whenever I question my legitimacy as a writer and a time management expert as to whether I have the right to say the things I say in this book, I think of my colleague, the world traveller, whose daughter didn't know him. I think of the lawyer who had had no life, and I think of all the other people I have met who would admit, if pressed, that perhaps, yes, they've let the harness stay on longer than it ought.

I think also of all the others I know, or know of, who have found success, in whatever manner they define that term, by taking the time to do it right.

If you are considering joining this latter group, by embracing some of the principles and practices mentioned in this book, be sure to write your ideas down, to get them out of your head (so as not to forget them
and
to make room for more). Then talk about them. Talk to a mentor. Talk to your manager. You can even write to me, if you'd like (just go to
www.bristall.com
and use the
Contact Us
link).

Then practice until you get it right.
Cooling down
is possible. It is healthier, and it will get you where you want to go, faster, and in better condition. Life's just too short to live at high speed.

absenteeism

accountability

agenda

for meeting

alarm clocks

Alcan Inc.

alertness

driving and eating

Alexander the Great

Allen, Woody

ambient momentum

anger

dangers of

controlling

and fear

Animal Farm
(Orwell)

Aristotle

arrhythmias

The Art of Happiness
(Dalai Lama)

assistants

AstraZeneca Inc.

attention deficit

overcoming in children

automobiles

car-free zones

ownership in China

bathroom breaks

allowing time for

in meetings

Bing, Stanley

biographies

as mentor

birthrate

in Japan

Blake, Anna

Blink
(Gladwell)

blood pressure

blood sugar.
See also
Sugar crash

“Blue Flag Day”

blue-skying

during commute

and creative thought

definition

and exercise

with eyes closed

how-to tips

role of coffee

role of sleep

tea ritual

types

body language

boredom

and exercise

Bowie, David

Bowie Theory

Branson, Richard

breakfast

benefits of

foods

importance of

15-minute

scheduling

skipping

and weight gain

Britain

tea ritual

Burchill, Julie

Burg, Bob

burnout

recognizing

and stress

and turnover rates

business cards

Business Communication: Process and Product
(Guffey, Rhodes, and Rogin)

calendar system

using effectively

cardiovascular disease

career

assessing future

car-free zones

carpooling

CD player

use for blue-skying

cell phones

as creativity killer

system to control use

use by children

children

and cell phone use

and discipline

guiding to slow down

sleep deprivation and

China

automobile ownership in

Churchill, Winston

circadian rhythms

Cittaslow

cleanliness

client relationships.
See also

Customer service

evaluating

clients

firing weak

clothes

selecting for workweek

coffee

and blue-skying

for breakfast

meeting and job hunting

in morning

role in business

communication

body language

and carpooling

eye contact

gestures

inflection

language used

and managing crises

non-verbal

with others

preference for type of

speech rhythms

vocal tone

writing style

communicative diseases

communities of practice

commuting

driving habits

carpooling

changing mindset to

as time for creative thought

tips for enjoying

conflict management

Cooper, Cary

coronary heart disease

Covey, Steven

creative thought

and blue-skying

role of sleep

stimulating

creativity.
See
creative thought

crises

cubicles, office

ambient momentum

creation of

distractions in

escaping from

isolationism of

and productivity

customer service

Dalai Lama

deadlines

assessing

death

caused by overwork

delegating

depression

during unemployment

deputy

appointing

diets

dinner

“Blue Flag Day”

conversation

and etiquette

importance of

distress

Don't Send a Résumé and Other Contrarian Rules to Help Land a Great Job
(Fox)

donuts

downsizing.
See also
Unemployment effect on individual

driving habits

and blue-skying

and commuting(
See also
Commuting)

and eating

eating while driving

effects of and personal blur

Drucker, Peter

eating.
See also
Breakfast, Dinner,

Food, Lunch

assessing habits

on the road

while driving

eating habits

of French

education

Eisner, Michael

email

accountability and

addiction to

assessing practices

“badminton”

blue-skying as relief from

costs of

criticisms of

effect on emotions

fear of missing

immediacy of

and information overload

managing

morning practices

processing by brain

responding to after-hours

speed

staying in the loop

tips for writing effective

using software to organize

emotions.
See also
Anger, Fear

effect of email on

Endless Referrals
(Burg)

errors

and stress

Esperanto

etiquette

at dinner table

eustress

event-to-event thinking

exercise

benefits of slow

and blue-skying

boredom and

building muscle

commitment to

effects of

with music

optimal time of day

scheduling

and sleep

during unemployment

in the workplace

eye contact

and communication

importance of

eye movement