Craving Shannon (21 page)

“Fuck me, Thirsting,” she called out. “Fuck me hard.”

He chuckled against her skin, obviously satisfied by her response, hearing her beg for it. “Spread your legs wide,” he requested.

Allyssa obeyed.

“Wider!” he demanded. “I want to see how wide you can spread for me.”

She pushed her legs in opposite directions until she couldn’t move another centimeter.

“Good girl,” he muttered.

She felt him grip her upper thighs then in one swift move, he rammed into her and buried himself entirely. She arched her back and screamed.

He moved slowly in and out at first, but then picked up momentum. True to his word, soon he was pounding her mercilessly. “Is that hard enough?” he asked through guttural moans.

She, overcome with physical relief, was convinced she never felt anything quite like it. “It’s…so good,” she whimpered. “It’s the best.”

“I’m the best fuck you’ve ever had?” he questioned.

“Yes,” she screamed. “Please don’t stop. It’s so good…”

He put his hand on her pelvis then moved his thumb downward until it found her mound. He rubbed his thumb in circles over it, causing Allyssa to scream and cry with pleasure. He reached his other hand under her ass. He angled her up and held her in place tightly, allowing him deeper entry.

After many long mind-shattering moments, Allyssa finally came hard, her body practically levitating off the bed. As she floated back down, Thirsting drove into her one last time then emptied himself inside her.

She lay still, panting heavily, trying to catch her breath. “That was…so good,” she gushed.

Thirsting’s lips were at her ear once more. “There’s plenty more where that came from,” he replied. “The night has only just begun.”

For the next two and a half hours, he brought her to heights she never thought possible. He entered her over and over, seeming to possess an unlimited amount of energy and stamina. His hands and mouth rubbed and licked at her vigorously while he rode her hard and fast. Before long, the sheets, damped with sweat, were a tangled mess beneath them, a statement to the chaotic, frenzied sex that had her gasping for breath.

Finally, when her body was thoroughly depleted of energy, and she had lost count of the orgasms, he asked her if she’d had enough.

“Yes,” she answered, nodding. “I’m exhausted.”

She felt him remove the binding on her wrists. Her arms ached from being in the same position for hours, not that she minded that much, it was a tiny price to pay for sex that great. She reached her arms out in front of her and spun them around to work out the kinks.

“You okay?” he asked.

“I’m fine,” she replied.

He put his hand on the material that covered her eyes. He pushed the fabric off.

She blinked a few times to adjust her vision to the light.

He leaned over and placed a soft kiss on her forehead then smiled down at her. “Happy almost anniversary, Baby,” he said.

She smiled back at him. “Happy almost anniversary,” she replied.

“You hungry?” he asked.

“Starving,” she answered, nodding.

“Let me just rest for a few minutes then we’ll go grab some dinner,” he suggested. “You’ve completely worn me out, woman.” He flopped down next to her and flung his arm around her waist. “Did you see the kids?” he questioned.

“Yes. Chloe and Jillian came by the hospital. Brian was at a football game,” she answered.

“Where did you tell them you were going?” he asked.

“I told them I was going out with Nora and that you had an after work meeting,” she responded.

“And they bought that? Chloe bought that?”

“Why wouldn’t she?” Allyssa queried.

“She’s always so clued in,” he answered. “It’s hard to put anything past her.”

“It’s completely believable,” Allyssa countered. “It’s a lot more convincing that telling them I was heading out to cheat on their dad…
with
their dad.”

He snuggled into her and chuckled.

Allyssa leaned up on her elbow and looked down at her husband. “I’m really going to miss Mr. Thirsting,” she said. “I loved all his sexy emails.”

“Mr. Thirsting will be back someday,” he promised. “Probably when you least expect him.”

“Swear?” she asked.

He nodded.

She ran her finger over his bottom lip and marveled at how handsome he was. His hair was more gray than brown these days, and his laugh lines more defined. He lived well, though and that helped to keep him looking years younger than his actual age. He ate well and got plenty of exercise, but most of all, he laughed all the time. He adored his family, his wife and kids. He treated every moment with them as though it was a precious gift. Most people that met him took him for a man in his mid-forties. It was hard to believe that he was going to be sixty in a few weeks. But like an expensive cut of meat or a fine wine, Chad Clarkson only ever improved with age.

⃰      ⃰      ⃰

Chad lay on his back and looked up into the face of his beautiful wife. He was a lucky man to have her. He loved her more than life itself. As she ran her finger over his bottom lip, he thought back to a young man, an idiot who didn’t believe in the kind of love he had with her, a much younger version of himself. That was back when he was free from the pain of loss, the agony of separation, but he was also ignorant to the joy of being with that one special person.

Then, without prompting, she popped into his mind, the girl who taught him how to love, the young woman who first captured his heart. He winced, feeling the old familiar pain.

“Are you alright?” his wife asked.

“Yes,” he said. She didn’t need to know how the memory of those dark days still haunted him, still pierced his heart from time to time.

Allyssa lay down next to him and snuggled up. He held her tightly, his head resting against hers. The comfortable silence allowed him to submerse in the dark thoughts, to exercise the demon until the next time, to let the memory run its course:

~  ~ ~ ~

He sat in an ambulance, holding her cold hand, his heart breaking in half, the agony threatening to consume him.

His mind played strange tricks with him, shutting down for long periods at a time. He seemed to be alone in a hospital waiting room one minute, but then his mother was with him the next. Where she had come from, he never could piece together. His father was there also, but seemed to disappear and reappear as the long, dark night wore on. At one point, he was sure Alex was sitting next to him, talking to him, but what he said, Chad could never recall. It was a blur of pain and torment.

How long that night lasted was anyone’s guess, but sometime, hours after the sun came up, a doctor came out to deliver the news. They had done all they could but Shannon was gone.

When he thought the pain couldn’t get any more severe, he fell to his knees and wept.

The next memory that registered was of his old bedroom. He was home in Connecticut. He was in his bed with no intention of ever leaving it. He heard Rosa come in every so often. He could tell by the nauseating smell of food that she was trying to coax him to eat. The only thing he wanted from her was the little tiny pill that made the pain go away, the one that made him numb and sleepy. His mother and father came in from time to time to check on him, both worried sick.

Then came the day when Rosa refused to give him a pill. He had to get up. He had to look presentable for Shannon’s funeral.

Shannon’s funeral!

How was that even fucking possible?

He barely survived the day.

A few days later, his mother asked him to try to come downstairs to see his cousins. It was Christmas day. He pulled the blanket over his head.

Sometime after the New Year, the pills were cut off completely. His mother was afraid he was going to end up with a drug addiction. Did that even matter?

He made it out of bed almost every day to sit at the window bench and look out at the Long Island Sound. Something about the water managed to bring a slither of peace to his black soul. Unconsciously, he would pick up the tiny velvet box off his side table and twist it around his fingers as he gaze out the window for hours.

The days bled into weeks, each one an empty void of misery.

He knew there was talk between his parents of mental illness, of not coping with grief in a normal manner. He told them firmly that if they even considered bringing in a professional, he would head back to his apartment in Manhattan. He made them a deal, he asked for more time, another month or two, then, if he still couldn’t cope with his loss, he’d gladly see a shrink.

On no special day in particular, his father stopped by his room to check on him. Charles sat down at the far side of the window bench. “How do you feel?” he asked.

“Like I’m a prisoner in this hellhole,” Chad replied in a voice void of emotion. He didn’t bother looking at his father, he kept his gaze on the vast body of water.

“Why don’t you leave the room, then?” Charles asked, exasperated.

“Not a prisoner in this room,” Chad clarified, “in this world. I can’t live without Shannon and I can’t join her without destroying you and mom.” He looked over in time to see deep concern flash in his father’s eyes, causing him to feel a twinge of guilt. “Don’t worry, I’m not suicidal,” he added quickly.

Charles nodded. “Why don’t you open the window, Son,” he suggested. “It’s a beautiful spring day.”

“Spring?” Chad asked, confused.

Charles nodded. “Yes, it’s spring. You’ve been sitting in this room for over three months.”

“Three months?” Chad repeated, hardly believing his ears. “What date is it?”

“It’s April first,” Charles replied.

“Holy fuck!” Chad said. “How?”

“You’ve been in a thick fog for a long time, Son,” Charles said sadly. “Too long.”

“I can’t believe it…” Chad mumbled, wondering how time had gone by so fast.

“What’s that in your hand?” Charles questioned suspiciously.

Chad stopped flipping the little black box between his fingers. He pulled open the lid and held it out so that Charles could see the two and a half carat diamond resting on the soft, velvet cushion.

“You bought that for Shannon?” Charles questioned.

Chad nodded. “The day before I left Israel, I went to buy her a Christmas present and ended up dropping fourteen thousand on this instead. I wanted to give it to the funeral director before she was…she was… buried…” The words burned his throat on the way out. He shrugged. “…I still wanted her to have it, to take it with her, but I guess I forgot. It was a crazy day.”

“You wanted to marry her?” Charles asked.

Chad nodded. “I wanted her forever,” he replied and gave his father a bittersweet smile.

Charles squeezed his bottom lip between his thumb and forefinger. He stared at his son intently. He leaned over and squeezed his son’s knee. “I’ll be right back,” he announced and left the room.

Chad stared back out the window and let the water hypnotize him.

When Charles returned, some twenty minutes later, he didn’t bother knocking before he barged in. “Jump in the shower and get dressed,” he ordered.

“What?” Chad asked.

“I want you to take a ride with me,” Charles explained.

“Dad, I don’t think—”

“Please, Son. We’ve allowed you to wallow in here for months. I’m asking you to please leave this room for one afternoon.”

Chad blew a deep breath through puckered lips. He could read on his father’s face how important it was to the older man. “Okay,” he said, nodding. “Give me twenty minutes to get dressed.”

Charles led Chad to his two-seater Beemer. He stuck in a Franz Liszt CD and raced down the long driveway. For a man who travel by limo often, Chad knew his father still enjoyed the art of fast driving.

As soon as they merged onto I-287, Chad knew they were not heading for Manhattan as he had surmised. “Dad, where are we going?” he asked.

“For a drive,” Charles replied. Something in his tone told Chad he was withholding information.

They made small talk as the miles went by. Charles filled Chad in on some family drama involving a feud between two of his cousins, then went on to talk about every single thing that happened in his office over the last three months.

After some time, Chad noticed that they were riding on I-380. “Pennsylvania?” he asked skeptically. “What’s in Pennsylvania?”

“Just something I wanted to show you?” Charles confessed.

“Did you buy land?” Chad questioned.

Charles shook his head.

Twenty minutes later, they were driving down a residential street.

“Where is this?” Chad asked, looking perplexedly out the window.

“Scranton,” Charles answered matter-of-factly. He slowed down, scowling at the road works that was consuming the entire left side of the road.

“Water main break,” Chad guessed.

Charles nodded and pulled the car to the right. He stopped just before a convenient store. “Wait here,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”