Crazy For You (23 page)

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Authors: Jennifer Crusie

Tags: #Contemporary

BOOK: Crazy For You
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When Zoe answered the phone, Quinn took a deep breath, and said, “Why did you and Nick break up? You never wanted to talk about it, but I need to know.”

“Because I left him,” Zoe said. “Is he all right? Why do you keep asking about him?”

“He’s fine.” Quinn searched for a reason besides
I just slept with him and he got strange at the end. Is that normal?
“He just broke up with Lisa. That’s like his twentieth girlfriend since you.”

“Is he upset about it?” Zoe said.

Quinn thought back to Nick rolling hot on top of her. “Not so’s you’d notice. I just wondered.”

“It was a long time ago,” Zoe said. “I told you, I think I married him to piss Mom off and get out of Tibbett. And he was fun until we ended up in Dayton, and he worked all the time and then just sort of vegged when he came home.”

“Vegged?”

“You know, read, played ball with the guys, that stuff.”

“He still does that,” Quinn said. “He and Max have a hoop out back of the garage.”

“Well, see.” Zoe’s voice sounded eminently reasonable. “I was pretty much there for sex, and I got bored. What is this about?”

“He only wanted you for sex?” Quinn hated saying it. For one thing, she didn’t want to be reminded that he’d
had
sex with Zoe.

“No, that’s the only thing I wanted him for. I don’t know what he wanted me for. A wife, I guess.” Her voice grew thoughtful. “Although he was never very possessive. It was more like I was just along for the ride. After three months, I made him take me home to see you and Mom, and I was so happy to be back in Tibbett that I knew something was wrong. When we went back to Dayton, I left. Couldn’t take it anymore.”

“Are you sorry?” Quinn asked, wanting absolution, wanting Zoe to say,
Take him, he’s yours.

“No. Is he?”

Quinn thought back to the few times he’d mentioned Zoe. He’d said her name without inflection, like anybody else’s name, nothing special. “I don’t think so. He doesn’t seem like he’s hiding anything.”

Zoe’s laugh snorted over the line. “Then he isn’t. Nick couldn’t hide anything if he tried. What you see with Nick is what you get.”

Quinn had a sudden sharp image of Nick lean and naked beside her. “Okay.”

“He was fun, just no zazz.” Zoe didn’t sound brokenhearted, and then her voice faded as she turned away from the phone to say, “Yes, you have zazz. That’s why you’ve got me.”

Quinn heard the rumble of Ben’s voice and then Zoe laughed, and she felt a twinge of envy. It must be wonderful to live with a man you loved and who loved you, the way Ben and Zoe lived. “How did you know Ben was the one?” she asked suddenly. “How were you so sure? You just met him at work, how did you know?”

“I didn’t really meet him at work,” Zoe said. “I mean, I told you and Mom that, but actually, he picked me up in a fountain.”

“What?”

“There was this fountain outside our building.” Zoe sounded embarrassed. “And I went out there one day, really depressed because I was almost thirty, and I was never going to have kids, and I wanted them, and because I was wearing a suit and being normal instead of, well, you know—”

“Instead of being Zoe,” Quinn said, knowing exactly.

“And I took off my shoes and pantyhose and went wading in the fountain because that’s what I would have done before I got to be a suit, and I didn’t even know Ben was there until he said, ‘You have great legs.’ He was sitting on the other side of the fountain with his pants rolled up and his feet in the water, looking at me through those horn-rim glasses, and I thought he was trying to pick me up, so I shut him down. And he said, no, it was just a scientific observation because he was happily married and the father of a fine son named Harold—”

“You’re kidding me,” Quinn said.

“—and I told him only a sadist would name a kid Harold, that my daughter was Jeannie and she was the star of her ballet class—”

“This is
great”
Quinn said.

“I know,” Zoe said. “I felt like me again. And then we told each other about how great our spouses were, and somewhere in there I realized he was lying in his teeth, and I told him I was actually a Russian spy with a license to kill, and he said, ‘I’ve always wanted to have sex in the afternoon with a Russian spy with a license to kill,’ and I said what a shame it was that he was married to such a wonderful woman or we certainly
could
have had sex, and he said ‘She left me,’ so we spent five days in a suite at the Great Southern and then eloped to Kentucky.”

“What?”

“Yeah,” Zoe said. “That’s why I told you we met at work and we’d known each other a long time. Dumb, huh?”

“It’s wonderful,” Quinn said. “No wonder you don’t miss Nick.”

“Hey, Nick was a good guy,” Zoe said. “Just not the right guy. Why are you asking about him so much anyway?”

“I’ve just been thinking about the way we used to be,” Quinn said truthfully. “Who we all were back then. Who we are now.”

“Yeah, well, I bet Nick’s the same now as he was then. Guys don’t change. Nick was always sports, cars, and sex.”

That sounded like Nick.

“Not that that was bad; I just got so tired of Fleetwood Mac I was ready to scream—”

Quinn went cold. “What?”

“Fleetwood Mac. He liked to fuck to Fleetwood Mac, and I will bet you a nickel he still does. Ask Lisa. I bet she’s heard ‘The Chain’ so many times she can come to it without him.”

“I’ll kill him,” Quinn said.

“What?”

Well, there she was. One of a series brought to you by Nick Ziegler. Music by Fleetwood Mac. The bastard.

“Quinn?”

He’d even pulled it out of her CD stack that night after Meggy and Edie had left. Making his move, changing his mind. She’d put it on. He’d kissed her because of Fleetwood Mac and stopped kissing her because of her hair. Then she’d cut her hair and—“I’m going to kill him.”

“You slept with him.” Zoe’s voice was flat.

“Yep.” The more Quinn thought about it, the more her blood boiled.

“Well.”

“Well, what?” Quinn said, ready to fight with anybody.

“Well, nothing. Except that you slept with my ex-husband, and you’re my sister, and we sound like one of Jerry Springer’s greatest hits.”

“I thought you didn’t care who he slept with.”

“I don’t.” Zoe sounded a little surprised. “I care who you sleep with, though.”

“Well, you can stop caring because I’m never sleeping with anybody ever again.” Quinn thought of Nick naked and hot on top of her, and shoved the thought aside. “Never.”

“It was that bad?”

“No.” Quinn tried not to think about it. “I just can’t believe he used Fleetwood Mac on me, too. He kissed me
halfway
through ‘Hold Me’ and had me naked by ‘You Make Lovin’ Fun.‘ ”

“I don’t think we ever made it to ‘You Make Lovin’ Fun,‘ ” Zoe said. “That was at the end of the album. He didn’t last that long. I’m not kidding about ’The Chain.‘ If I hadn’t made it by then, I wasn’t going to because he was done.”

“He’s changed,” Quinn told her. “ ‘Hold Me’ was on its second play by the time I came. I don’t believe this.”

“I don’t remember ‘Hold Me’ at all,” Zoe said. “The
Rumours
album, right?”

“They’ve made a few others since you were eighteen,” Quinn said. “This was the
Greatest Hits.”

“And I imagine he’s been making a few with it, too,” Zoe said. “He was always good at taking girls to bed. The rat bastard.”

“He still is,” Quinn said. “I’m so mad I could spit.”

“I can’t believe he seduced my little sister,” Zoe said. “He was always sex-crazed, but I thought he’d have
matured
—”

“I seduced him,” Quinn said.

“What?”

“I went over to his place so he’d take me to bed.” Quinn felt stupid saying it. “I wanted to know what it would be like. So I went over and propositioned him.”

“Oh.” Zoe regrouped. “So why are you mad at him? I mean, I’m mad at him because you’re mad at him, but now I don’t know why you’re mad at him. Was it bad?”

“I thought I was different.” Quinn felt like a fool while she was saying it.

“You probably were until you went to bed with him,” Zoe said. “You have to be the only woman he was ever close to that he’d never seen naked. Besides his mother and Darla.”

“Thank you,” Quinn said. “That makes me feel so much better.”

“In fact, he was probably closer to you than anybody he’d ever seen naked. He was never very good at combining emotion and sex. Don’t expect a lot of phone calls discussing the relationship.”

“I can’t believe I was so dumb,” Quinn said.

“Tell me again why you did this,” Zoe said. “Because for the life of me, I can’t figure it out.”

Because he’s darling. Because he’s sexy. Because I trust him.
“Because I wanted to be like you, I think. Exciting instead of just... there.”

Zoe didn’t say anything for so long, Quinn thought they might have lost the connection. “Zoe?”

“I’m thinking. What happened all of a sudden? You never wanted to be me before. You left Bill, you slept with Nick. What’s with you?”

“I don’t know. I just wanted ... different.”

“Well, you got it. You want me to come home for a while?”

“No.” Quinn sighed. “What can you do? I’ll get this figured out.”

“Well, I can castrate Nick with a dull spoon. I told him once I’d do it if he ever touched you, so he’s probably expecting me.”

Quinn sat up straighter. “What do you mean, you told him once?”

“I caught him looking at you. You were just a baby and he had that look in his eye. I couldn’t believe it.”

“How old a baby?”

“We were married. We’d just come home and—”

“Sixteen,” Quinn said. “Nineteen years ago. He waits nineteen years, and then he plays Fleetwood Mac.”

“You may be taking this too hard,” Zoe said. “It’s just sex, not death. Unless you’re hooked.”

“I’m not hooked,” Quinn said, fairly sure she was telling the truth. “I just thought the sex would be exciting, and I wanted some exciting sex before I died.”

“Wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know,” Quinn said. “I was trying to figure out what the hell was going on most of the time and then all of a sudden I was coming. It seemed so unlike me to be doing that with Nick.”

Zoe’s laugh cackled through the line. “Sounds great. Not.”

“Toward the end it was,” Quinn said, trying not to sound wistful. “Shortly after ‘No Questions Asked’ it approached excellence. Then he got hungry for pizza, and the whole thing went to hell.”

“You sure you don’t want me to come home?”

“Positive,” Quinn said. “I can handle this. I have dull spoons of my own.”

“Let me know,” Zoe‘ said.

“Oh, yeah,” Quinn said. “I’ll keep you posted.”

* * *
“So how was your hot date with Barbara?” Nick asked Max when he came into work the next morning.

Max snarled at him and went into the office.

“You’re number four, you know,” Nick called after him, needing to spread his own misery. “Pretty soon Barbara’s going to have to get one of those number things like they have at Baskin-Robbins. Now serving.”

He heard Max slamming drawers and felt about as pleased as he could for how pissed off he was.

“You guys can form a club,” Nick went on, talking at the top of his lungs. “The Promise Breakers. You can stand up at the beginning and say, ‘I’m Max and I’m a—’ ”

“‘You got a reason for busting my chops on this?” Max said, standing in the door to the office.

“Yeah.” Nick folded his arms and leaned against the workbench. “I do. I like Darla.”

“I don’t,” Max said.

“The hell you don’t,” Nick said. “If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t be this damn mad. And you wouldn’t have pulled that jackass stunt last night.”

“I didn’t sleep with her,” Max said. “I took her home right after the Mud Pie. She’s the most boring woman I’ve ever met.”

“That’s because you’ve been living with Darla for all these years,” Nick said. “She sets a high standard.”

“Fuck off,” Max said and went back into the office, and that was the last voice Nick heard until Quinn walked into the garage three hours later.

“Fleetwood Mac,” Quinn said and watched with satisfaction as Nick raised his head up from the Honda he was working on so fast he smacked himself on the edge of the hood.

“What?” He rubbed his head and looked at her across the car. “Don’t sneak up on me like that. Where’d you come from? Why aren’t you at school?”

“I signed out,” Quinn said. “I’m on my lunch break. Don’t change the subject. You did me to Fleetwood Mac.”

Nick looked over his shoulder and then came around the car to take her arm. “Could we talk about this over here, please?”

When they were in the back of the garage, Quinn said, “I thought I was different.”

“You are different,” Nick said. “What are we talking about? Different from what?”

“Different from all the other women you’ve—” Quinn struggled to find a word that wasn’t gross or bland.

“You are different from all the other women I’ve.” Nick sounded grim. “Which is one of the reasons I didn’t for so long.”

“Well, it’s so good to finally be one of the club,” Quinn said.

“What the hell are you talking about?” Nick frowned at her. “You knew I wasn’t a virgin. Why are you so bent?”

Quinn swallowed, trying to keep her voice firm. “You did Zoe to Fleetwood Mac, too.”

“Hell, I do everybody to Fleetwood Mac,” Nick said, and then he winced and said, “Let me put that another way.” Then the other shoe dropped. “You told Zoe?”

“Dumb me, I thought I was different, not just one of a series,” Quinn said. “I can’t believe this.”

“I can’t, either.” Nick scowled at her. “You’re mad because I like to do it to the Mac? Swell. Pick another group. I’m flexible. You’re the one who put it on the stereo.” He sounded sarcastic, not apologetic. “I can’t believe you told Zoe.”

The last thing she needed was sarcasm.

“You’re very flexible,” Quinn said. “Zoe mentioned that when we talked. You also seem to have developed staying powers.”

He scowled at her. “I was eighteen when I was with her, cut me a break.”

“Aside from that,” Quinn went on with savage cheerfulness, “according to our comparisons, you haven’t changed much.”

Nick closed his eyes. “I don’t want anything to do with this,”

“Well, you should have thought of that before you turned on the stereo, you jerk.” Quinn glared at him. “I can’t believe I was just like the others.”

“You weren’t just like the others,” Nick said. “You’re still not. None of them ever creeped me out like you’re doing.”

“Wait a minute—”

“Also, you’re the one who turned on the stereo, not me, babe.” Nick folded his arms. “You were the one who cut your hair and carne up with no bra and put ‘Hold Me’ on.”

“Oh, this is my fault.” Quinn fought back the urge to pick up a wrench and deck him with it, mostly because he was right. If she’d stayed out of that apartment—

“And then you had to call Zoe,” Nick said. “She’s probably sharpening her scissors now.” He leaned against the car and crossed his arms. “You know, it’s just dawned on me. This isn’t about me at all.”

“The hell it isn’t,” Quinn said, indignation making her voice rise.

“This is about you wanting to be Zoe.” He looked at her grimly. “That night on the couch, you said you wanted to be like Zoe. The only reason you slept with me is because Zoe did.”

“That’s not true,” Quinn said, pretty sure it wasn’t. “I really wanted you. And you really wanted me, too. damn it.” When he just shook his head as if he was disgusted at her, she said, “Fine. I just wanted you to know that that was it. Never again.”

“Fine,” Nick said, and Quinn felt the word like a stab.

“Glad to see you’re taking it so well,” she said. “I really changed your life, didn’t I?”

“You were fun,” Nick said. “A lot of hard work, but fun. But I don’t need this kind of hassle, and I sure don’t need to be your ticket to Zoe.”

He half-turned to go back to the car, and Quinn kicked him hard.
“Hey!”
he said, nursing his shin as he turned back to her.

“That’s just until I can find a dull spoon,” she said, and stomped out.

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