Authors: S.R. Watson,Shawn Dawson
Tags: #S.I.N. Rockstar Trilogy, #Book Two
Creed of Redemption (S.I.N. Rock Star Trilogy)- Book #2
2016 S.R. Watson & Shawn Dawson
First Edition: August 2016
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, actual events or locales is entirely coincidental. The author acknowledges the trademark status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction. The publication of these trademarks is not associated with or sponsored by the trademark owner.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without the express written permission of the author.
Cover Design: Sommer Stein of
Perfect Pear Creative Covers
Editor: Vanessa Leret Bridges of
Photographer: Allan Spiers of
Allan Spiers Photography
Formatter: Stacey Blake of
Table of Contents
Creed of Redemption
Original Song Lyrics by Diesel
I told myself that I’d never look back
I was the reason for all your pain and I never wanted to hurt you again
I never wanted to be the reason for your tears so it was best that I moved on
But then you forgave me for all my past sins
You refused to give my heart back and it was then that the road to my redemption began
Here is my creed of Redemption
I promise to be a better man this time around
My heart was never mine from the minute you came around
Here is my creed of redemption
I will give you my all
You’ve seen me at my worst
You see me like nobody else can
You have my heart and I will forever be your man
You’re my redemption
2 Months Ago
he catastrophic scene that just unfolded before me has left me rocked. I didn’t wait for Diesel to give me the green light before showing up here and now I may have ruined everything. The hurt. The disgust. The eyes never lie. Lourdes made it blatantly clear that she doesn’t want to have anything to do with either of us. I watch helplessly as my brother paces frantically, running his hands through his hair. With each distraught step, I witness his regression back to a place I know well. I’ve seen it, so I recognize it. He hits the wall near the kitchen before resting his head on his forearm. The wall is the only thing holding him up. “Fuck this shit,” he mumbles to himself a few times. The Diesel I grew up with is back, and it fucking rips my heart open. He let someone in and in its brevity, he was truly happy. Somehow Lourdes reached him—two broken pieces mended each other. Now she’s gone because she feels betrayed. Thing is, Diesel was going to tell her. He just needed time. Our story is not a pleasant one. Yes, we are identical twins, but there is a reason that we are carbon copies of one another. A fucked-up reason, but necessary all the same.
I want to go to him, but I’m to blame for this. I needed to talk with him and I wasn’t getting through to him on his phone. My haste has unraveled our plan. I can’t even concentrate on the reason I came here in the first place. It will have to wait.
“I’m sorry, brother,” I say from the sofa. I know these words are futile, but I don’t know what else to say. “Tell me what I can do to fix this.”
“Nothing Sevyn. There is fucking nothing you can do. You’ve done enough, don’t you think?” Diesel hits the wall again and pieces of sheetrock crumble to the floor. “I’ve fucking lost her.”
“Diesel—,” I start, but he holds up his hand to silence me.
“Don’t! It’s done. This is the reason I don’t fucking let anyone get close to me. You give them the power to hurt you. I won’t make that mistake again.” He walks over to the window with his hands still in a fist and just stares out into the distance. “I didn’t deserve her anyway,” he adds faintly.
I can’t stand here and watch him self-destruct—become a shell of his old self. Knowing I did this is more than I can stand right now. In one instant, I’ve managed to wreck two people with my carelessness. I have to get the hell out of here. I can’t be here for Diesel because he will not let me—not this version of him.
“I’m so sorry Diesel. Just know, you do deserve someone like Lourdes. She needs someone like you.” I get up from the sofa and head toward the stairs leading to the first floor. “I’ll be in touch. I hope things work themselves out. Give it time and then tell her everything. I think she will understand.”
Diesel turns to face me now. “What did you come for? What did you have to tell me that was so important that it couldn’t have fucking waited until I called you back?”
“Nothing that can’t wait now. I should’ve just waited. I know I fucked up,” I retort.
Diesel closes the distance between us in a blur. He’s nearly nose to nose with me now. “Are you serious right now? You just turned my damn world upside down and now you want to leave without giving me an explanation as to why? Think again,
.” His nostrils flare, and I know he is restraining himself from pummeling the shit out of me.
“It’s about our father,” I start.
“Your father, but continue,” he corrects. He is wound tight. His body is stiff and those fists are at his side, ready to engage.
“He’s dying!” I blurt out. I watch as the wind is knocked from his sails with that piece of news. His face falls before he works to school his features.
“Good. At least one good thing came out of this fucking disastrous day.” His shoulders drop and his fists loosen. His words are at odds with how he looks. He looks lost and I don’t know how to fix it. I know he doesn’t mean what he just said. He has every reason to hate our father, yet in this moment, I’m not so sure that he does, despite his vile words.
He turns on his heel and heads upstairs to the third floor. Our conversation is over.
I’ll go for now. He needs time to digest this news and work his shit out with Lourdes. Our plan can wait. As I walk through the bushes to the motorcycle I have hidden, guilt gnaws at me. Thing is, I had an instant connection with Lourdes. I look toward the docks and I remember the first time I saw her there. Everyone was out enjoying the lake and she just sat there in the fucking August heat in baggy ass jeans and a black t-shirt. I shouldn’t have been attracted to her, but I was. Something about her intrigued me. Then she opened her mouth and her sass pulled me in further. Diesel had already warned me about their little spat so I would be armed with the info I needed to double as him, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t going to let her stay mad. I didn’t change out of my clothes either. I sat my ass on that hot fucking dock with her and was determined to see her smile.
I knew she could never be mine, but each time I doubled as Diesel in the house, my will was tested. Together Diesel and I had a plan and she wasn’t part of it. When Diesel fell for her, I knew I needed to close the door on the possibility of Lourdes and me. I know what my brother is feeling as far as Lourdes is concerned because, sadly, I feel it too. I wanted to run after her just as much as he did. She managed to get through to both of us and now she’s gone. Now I don’t have to pretend—to keep my feelings to myself. I should be relieved, but instead, I hate that I squandered a chance at happiness for my brother. I really do hope they work it out, even at the expense of my own happiness.