Crude: A Stepbrother Romance (12 page)

It’s half working.

“So, Knox,” Joe’s sawing into his steak as he glances up at me, pulling my attention away from Paige; “You’re finally starting to feel things out around here I take it?”

Paige chokes on her food.

“Absolutely, sir,” I nod authoritatively, mimicking Joe’s own mannerisms; “It takes a little exploring and prying, but I think I’m really getting used to the new places.”

She’s staring at me like I’ve completely lost my mind, her mouth hanging open and this cute, bright red flush across her face that’s a cross between mortified and wanting to murder me. Hey, at least I’ve finally got her attention, right?

I put on my most cheesy grin for King Joe as he nods and smiles at me. My mother is beaming away at me as well, so I guess I’m making up for a little lost graces here.

“I’m proud of you, Knox,” Joe says, spearing a piece of tenderloin; “You’ve really shown some effort with adapting to this new change.” He shoots Paige a quick sideways glance, as if to say the opposite to her while he chews his food. I want to say something, even if I won’t. I frown; I mean, shit, give the girl a break. She’s wound pretty fucking tight as it is, and  it’s not like either of us got
eased
into this whole idea of getting new step-parents until we were moving in with them.

I mean,
I
can deal with it, cause, well, I’m not going to freaking Columbia in the fall. I’ve got nothing else on the brain except how to spend my summer, and how best to continue exploring Paige and her own boundaries.

“So how was practice today, honey?”

Paige blushes and looks quickly down at her plate. Yeah, I suppose no answer is better than “oh I was making out with my new stepbrother in the pool instead of practicing the piano”.
 

Woops.

“Paige?”

“I- I got busy.”

Joe’s fork comes down on his plate with a clatter; “Paige-”

“Dad, I know.”

“We talked about this.”

“I’m fine, I’m-”

Joe waves his hand, silencing her in a way that has my fist tightening under the table; “Your trials are coming up in August, Paige. that’s three weeks awa-”

“Dad, I’ll be read-”

“You need to be ready now!”

He’s louder than I think he meant to be, but the effect is pretty immediate as the whole table, and even those around us, get instantly quiet.

Damn, dude.

He shakes his head and takes a deep breath; “Honey, you know it’s just because I want the best for you.”

Paige nods quietly; “I know.”

I want to scream, or throw something, or reach across the table and shake her or kiss or
anything
to just snap her out of it!
Anything
to get that fire I know that’s inside of her roaring and anything to give her the courage to do what
she
wants to do.

“Maybe you could take a page out of Knox’s book over there.” I cringe as Paige’s eyes dart up to mine, flaring.

“Hard work pays off, honey, remember that. Keep at it and you’ll be amazed at what doors open up for you.” Joe smiles at Paige and reaches out to pat her hand; “Free up those distractions, honey.”

*****

Later that night, I slip through the bathroom to her room, only to find the door locked fast from the other side.

“
Pssst!
” I whisper through the door; “
Hey, open up.
”

“Go away, Knox. I have work to do”

I frown; did that fucking pep talk at the dinner table really get to her like this?

“Oh c’mon, don’t you want to continue what we were discussing befo-”

“NO, Knox.” Her voice is tight, and I can tell she’s right on the other side of the door; “No, I do not. Please just leave me alone, OK?”

“Paige, c’mon, just open-”

The door swings wide and I grin at her; “Well, fancy meeting you-”

“No, none of that.” Her eyes dart across my face, full of...what, fear? What’s she scared of?

“I have a lot of work to do, Knox,” She says quickly and quietly; “I don’t have time for things like you.”

A shadow crossed my brow; “Things like me?”

“You know what I mean.”

I frown; “
No
, I don’t. Enlighten me.”

“Distractions; things that’ll just keep me back.”

I can feel the anger flash in me; “Ahh, I see. Well, hey, fuck you too, right?”

She winces slightly, a hurt look flitting across her face before she looks down at the floor. She’s inches away from me but we’re
oceans
apart; “You know what I mean.”

“Crystal fucking clear,
princess
,” I mutter, before I turn and stalk back to my own room.

Crystal clear.

Four days later, and I still can’t get Knox and that incident in the bathroom out of my head.

Wow,
‘incident
?’ Ugh, no wonder that was my first real sexual experience.

And of course, thinking of it like that is even worse somehow. When I frame it in that context, with Knox being my
first
with something like that, it’s almost just extra dirty.

Deliciously, wonderfully, exquisitely dirty. The kind of dirty I don’t ever want to wash off; the kind of dirty that’s kept me up and gasping into my pillow the last four nights in a row.

I groan, rubbing my sleepy eyes. I need to get my head together; I need to focus. I mean what sort of a pervert am I turning into here where I’m fantasizing over and
over
again about the one boy in the world I need to and should have absolutely
nothing
to do with? I mean it’s not like what we did was illegal or anything, it’s just...
wrong
. And it’s going to hurt my future if I let him distract me like that anymore.

The problem is, being distracted by Knox Shepherd is just so much
fun
. So much...
ugh
; just,
no
.

So I’m ignoring him now, because I have to. Which is not to say that I’m not thinking about that time in the bathroom. In fact, that’s the hardest part about all this; the fact that I can’t stop thinking about that night, or him touching me there, or the feel of that hot weapon between his legs searing against my skin.

The feel of him clenching as he came against me, or the feel of his come; hot on my body.

I groan, squinting at the books in front of me and shoving the dirty thoughts I’m having of the boy in the room next to me out of my head. Like I said, I need to focus; it’s time to put the work in. I’m cramming for my advanced placement classes for Columbia; you know, because
regular
classes at the Ivy League school with the 6.5% percent acceptance rate is just plain slacking.

Right
.

I’m also practicing piano every second I’m not reading, sleeping, or eating, which is at least a nicer distraction than the books. Of course, this also means I’ve got zero time alone with my keyboard and my headphones, and with Knox and Amanda here now, there’s
never
a time when I’m alone to sing
my own songs
out loud by myself.

Dad seems to take notice of the studying though, so at least he’s eased up me a little this week. I mean,
I get it
; really, I do. I’m know I’m pretty much a model kid, and I know we’ve got money, but there’s no way raising me after my mom took off was exactly
easy
for him. And I know he wants the best for me, especially after that whole thing.

It’s just,
tough
sometimes, you know?

The shower in the bathroom between Knox’s room and mine kicks on, dragging me out of my thoughts. There’s the muffled sound of music playing, and I frown and strain my ears trying to hear what the heck Knox Shepard listens to when he showers.
 

I’m frowning, not quite able to hear it, and I find myself starting to get up out of my desk chair to see if I can-

And then he starts belting along to it, and I stop and just
stare
at the door.

You have got to be fucking kidding me.

“I wanna fuck you like an animal!”

I groan and cringe, listening to Knox belt out the dirty lyrics to the Nine Inch Nails song and just shaking my head as I stalk back to my desk and furiously open my book again.

Right, and here I was just starting to think I could
ever
get that man out of my head.

*****

“I’m thinking we might have company for dinner this weekend.”

I look up sharply as I finish
Nocturne in E minor
to see my dad smiling at me from a seat across the room; “Oh?”

“Yeah, the Rileys got in touch recently about maybe getting together.” He smiles at me; “That was beautiful by the way.”

“Thanks.”
And thanks for noticing.

I frown; “Wait, the
Riley
Rileys?”

Dad chuckles; “Do we know more than one Riley family? You remember their son Josh, right?”

I roll my eyes; “Yes, Dad. He tried to feel my boobs when we were fourteen.”

He laughs; “Well, apparently he’s turning into quite the upstanding young man. He’s back home from Exeter for the summer before he heads to Yale in the fall. Impressive resume, and he wants to get into politics, too.’

“Good for him.”

“He’s been asking about you.”

I look up sharply, the pieces suddenly clicking; “Wait, is
that
why they’re coming over for dinner?”

“Oh, of course not. Richard and I have been meaning to catch up for ages, and I know they’re excited to meet Amanda as well.”

“And Knox?”

“Of course, and Knox.”

I arch my brow at my dad; “So this has nothing at all to do with trying to set me up with Josh Riley?”

“Paige!” Dad laughs; “Of course not, honey.” He gets up, shaking his head and chuckling; “
But
,”

Ahh, yeah; there’s a ‘but’.

“
But
, if you two
did
somehow hit it off, well, how great would that be? Our family and their family? Together?”

I purse my lips before I speak; “Richard Riley’s in tanker shipping, right?”

“Hmm? Oh, yes, yes he’s doing quite well with that.”

I want to scream. What the
fuck
is this, feudal, medieval England? Am I being set up with another rich old money family to secure
business
? Married off into the fold?

Yeah, I remember Josh Riley just
fine
. I remember him being a spoiled little trust-fund brat. I remember him as being clean-cut, and groomed, and smooth. And it seems older Josh is about the same; from prep-school to Ivy League, and then probably off to run a hedge fund or run for state senate or something. Basically, he’s the opposite of Knox, who is raw, and wild, and rebellious. Knox who’s
hot
, not groomed. Knox’ who’s
dirty
, not clean cut.
 

Knox who apparently after a week, is still totally and completely still on my mind.

“So, Sunday then?”
 

“Can’t wait?”

My dad comes over and puts his arm around my shoulders as he leans down to kiss my head; “I love you, you know.”

I smile; “I know, dad.”