Crushing Beauty (Harbingers of Sorrow MC): Vegas Titans Series (9 page)

Britton slowly opened her eyes, replaying the events of the
previous twenty-four hours. She stared at the picture of the two of them from
so long ago. If only sixteen-year-old Britton had known what she would get
herself into ten years later. She couldn’t help but shoot through scenarios
that would undoubtedly end this whole journey. There was no “happily ever
after” for them. She would need to arrest Jagger Stromm in the end. They would
never live out their days together in the home he had built for the two of
them.

She rolled to her other side. He was still sleeping; he
looked peaceful and happy. The blanket hung down at his waist, and his bare
chest was rising toward the ceiling. Britton studied his body. She lightly
traced his scars, remembering their correlating stories. The splay of nicks
across his chest were still prominent and the scars were mirrored on his
forearms. She recalled finding nine-year-old Jagger curled up inside the
fireplace, tears mixing with the blood scattered across his face. He hadn’t
cleaned the windows in time for dinner, and for that, was thrown through one by
his father.

The scrapes across his face were minor, but his forearms and
chest took the brunt of the incident. She circled the burns and slices, and
came to an unfamiliar gash. It was large, at least four inches, and it dug into
his lower abdomen. She placed her hand over top, hiding its existence. Jagger’s
hand jutted from its rest and seized her wrist. Before she knew it, she was
flat on her back with her hands pinned above her head. His eyes softened and his
grip relaxed as he became aware of his surroundings.

“I’m so sorry, Britton. I completely forgot where I was. Are
you okay?” He hugged her close.

“I’m fine, just startled. Are
you
okay?”

“I am now.”

She couldn’t help but ask. “Where did that scar come from?”

Jagger breathed deeply and pushed her away, staring into her
eyes. “How about I make us some breakfast.”

“Jagger… I don’t need breakfast. I want you to talk to me”

He wanted to stay in bed. He wanted to tell her everything. He
just didn’t know if he was ready. For that matter, he didn’t know if she was
ready either.

“I don’t know if that’s the best pillow talk.”

Every moment she was with him, she could feel herself
falling harder. She needed to get the information and get out, while she still
could. “I want to know everything about you: everything I missed.”

He leaned in and gently kissed her forehead. How could he
tell her this? Would she run out of the house and never be heard from again? Jagger
collapsed onto his back, shooting his eyes up toward the heavens. He searched
for the words, carefully choosing each piece of information he offered up.

“Do you remember the people I started hanging out with in
high school?”

“Yes.” Britton didn’t want to answer him, fearing that her
reactions might cause him to stop talking. Was he about to tell her everything?

“Well, as a new member, I was required to carry out tasks
that may have been on the riskier side. I wasn’t very good at keeping a low
profile...I was arrested four times before I was eighteen and I was on
probation. Did you know that?”

“No.” She actually didn’t know that. She was unaware of his
arrests while they were dating, and they weren’t in his file. Had he been able
to get his juvenile record expunged?

“I tried to hide it all from you, but I knew that if I was
caught the night of the accident with weed and alcohol in my system, I would
surely go to jail for a long time. I couldn’t risk that for so many reasons.”

She tried to take it all in. He couldn’t risk going to jail
for her so he left her alone on the side of the road? She would use this piece
of information to remind herself of why she was putting him away.

“So I went into hiding with the club. Three years later, I
found out that my mom had died from a heroin overdose. I hadn’t spoken to my
father while I was in hiding, but I thought I should pay him a visit. I found
him drunk, throwing beer bottles against the wall. I tried to calm him down,
but he jabbed a broken bottle into my stomach.”

He paused, unsure if he should continue. Her eyes were wide,
and she looked bewildered.

“What did you do?” She whispered.

Jagger contemplated his next confession. Was she ready for
this? Was she ready to carry his burden? “I was in a lot of pain, and he
wouldn’t stop pushing the glass further into me. I wrapped my hands around his
neck and squeezed. I couldn’t stop myself. His hand dropped, and I finally let
go, but it was too late.”

Britton was stunned. Did he just confess to murder? Was he
going to finish that sentence? She became very uneasy, not sure if she should
be in the same room with him now. How mad would he have to get to kill again? Why
hadn’t she known about this? His file included the death of his parents, but
not how they died. How did he get away with murder? What connections did this
man have in the system?

“Please say something.” He begged her. He had put himself
out there, willing to trust her, but he needed something in return to know that
he hadn’t made a mistake.

“I’m sorry.” She began to cry. “I’m sorry that you had to
deal with that alone.” Her words were true. His father was a terrible man, and
he was only defending himself, but taking his life could not have been easy for
him. She thought back to her psychology classes in college. It was all making
sense. This was the reason he had turned into someone who could tie her up,
slam her up against a wall, and God knows what else.

He grabbed her, crushing her to his chest. It felt so good to
finally tell that to her. He wasn’t completely sure of her reaction, but it was
better than he had feared.

There were so many things she wanted to ask him. What did he
do after he realized what had happened to his father? How did he get away with
murder? What happened the last seven years that caused him to transform from a
kid in hiding to the leader of the entire biker club?

“I think I’m ready for breakfast.” She smiled warily.

He nodded with an understanding grin, crawled out of bed,
and left the room.

Britton needed a moment to herself. She needed to process
everything he had just confessed. What was he actually capable of? She found
the possibility of danger oddly thrilling. She tried to understand her fear,
questioning if she should continue with the operation, but everything within
her told her to not give up just yet. She wanted to stay with him. She wanted
to figure him out. Britton climbed off the bed, wrapped herself in the satin
sheet, and stepped out into the living area.

Jagger was standing there in the kitchen. He had donned a
pair of speckled gray sweatpants that were now hanging casually on his hips. She
leaned up against the wall, admiring him.

“I think I’m scared of you.” She admitted.

He turned around quickly, not realizing that she had snuck
up behind him. He adored the way she was holding the sheet against her body. Why
was she being modest with him now?

“What does that mean?”

“I don’t know.”

“Do you want to leave?” He hated to say those words, but he
needed to find out what was going through her head.

“No. I don’t.”

He smiled, dropped the spatula, and briskly marched to her
side.

“You don't need to be scared of me. You have my word, this—”
He lifted her scraped wrists into view. “—hurt me more than it hurt you.”

She took a breath and turned her back to him. The skin on
her spine was turning purple from being pushed up against the bathroom wall the
night before. She slowly lifted her arms, displaying the bruises forming in the
shape of his fingertips. She didn’t want to upset him, but if she was going to
continue with him, she needed to make sure that she lived to see it through. The
only way to do that was to make him aware of what his anger had already caused
him to do.

“And this was just because David called me.”

“No it wasn’t. It…”

“Jagger. Things about me are going to upset you. I need to
know that I’m safe even if you don’t like something I have to say.”

He nodded, taking her bruises in. He couldn’t believe that
he had done that to her. Had he been that oblivious to his own strength?

“It will never happen again. You have my word.”

“Thank you.” She paused, needing to get out of the dismal
energy that was surrounding them now. “Unless I want it to.” She winked at him.

He chuckled, unable to hide the smile that took over his
face. He snatched the sheet out of her hands and threw it to the side. Jagger
effortlessly threw her naked body over his shoulder, strode back into the
bedroom, and dropped her onto the bed. He crawled on top of her, crushing her
beneath his weight.

“You just make sure to tell me when that is.” He whispered.

She wanted to cry out
now
but refrained, begging her
emotions to have some self-control. Instead, she swung her arms to his back and
dug her nails into his skin. He groaned, pushing his weight into her hips. She
arched into him, meeting his demands. His mouth yearned for hers, and he bent
down to claim his prize. He stopped, inches from their connection.

“I thought I was making you breakfast.”

“But now I’m hungry for something else.” Her words teased
him, pushing him to satisfy this new hunger.

“You really are something else, Britton Ramirez. Something
else.”

He lifted himself up and clutched her in his arms. He
carried her into the kitchen, stole the sheet off the floor, and sat her on top
of the island, laying the sheet down first. She quickly pulled the ends up and
around her naked body, finding comfort in the brief coverage.

Jagger sliced off a small piece of omelet and stabbed it
with a fork. He twisted to her, hinting for her to open her mouth. She
responded accordingly, taking a bite of the nourishment. It was delicious. From
that bite, she realized that she hadn’t eaten anything substantial in so long. She
opened her mouth again, pleading for more. He happily answered, feeding her the
remainder of the omelet. They finished their breakfast in silence; they didn’t
need words.

“What would you like to do today?” He queried, his palms
lightly touching the tops of her knees. “After you break up with David, of
course.”

He wasn’t going to drop it. She would need to set up a
meeting today. “I have to work tonight.”

“No you don’t.”

“Jagger, I do.”

He narrowed his eyes, knowing what he was about to say may
make him seem overbearing, but there were some things that he wouldn’t accept. “I
don’t want you working at the casino anymore.”

“It’s my job.”

“I will take care of you. I don’t want you working.”

“And then what? What happens when this is over and I don’t
have a job?”

In that moment, she forgot that she worked for the FBI. She
was honestly asking him what would happen to her when he undoubtedly left her
again. Jagger took a step back, letting her works sink in.

“When this is over?”

“Come on Jagger, I’m just being realistic.”

His blood was boiling. He wanted to grab her and force her
to believe that he would never leave her, but he knew his adrenaline was
pounding too much to lay a hand on her. He kept his distance.

“What do you need from me?”

“What?”

“What do I need to do to show you that I’m not going anywhere
this time?”

This was her chance. She would tell him she needed to know
what he did for work: everything he did for work. She would ask him to take her
to the motorcycle club house and introduce her to his key players.

“I…” She paused, finding it difficult to lead him into the
trap.

“Anything. I would do anything for you. Just ask.”

“I don’t know.”

“What don’t you know?”

“Anything about you: who you are, what you do.”

“But you do know who I am.”

“Do I?”

“You are the only one in the world who does. And what I do…”
he didn’t feel good about this situation, but to lose her again would be the
worst thing that could ever happen to him. He couldn’t let this be the end. “I'll
show you.”

She'd finally done it. He was going to divulge all his secrets.
He was going to jail, and she would put him there. She searched his pleading
eyes, and a deep feeling of hatred spread throughout her body. But it wasn’t
hatred toward him. In that moment, she hated herself. How could she do this to
someone who obviously loved her, to someone who she…no. She couldn’t think that
way. She was undercover and she was on a mission. This was her job, and she
couldn’t let her emotions cloud her judgment. She nodded her head. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yes, okay.”

“So we’re doing this for real? You and me?” His voiced
cracked.

“You and me.” Britton nodded and started to sob, collapsing
into his chest.

“No, no, Britton, this is a good thing. Don’t cry.” He
lifted her chin up, studying her face. “You are happy about this, right?”

“Of course.” The problem was that she didn’t know what case
she was happy about. Was it that he had asked her to stay with him, to be his? Or
was it that she would be successful on her first undercover case? David would
be so proud. David. What would David think if he knew the thoughts flying
through her mind?

“I have to call David.”

“And I’ll call your boss.”

“No.”

“Britton, please, I can’t have you working there anymore. I
can’t think about you walking around in your tiny, tight dresses and letting
other men ogle you. It’s just not acceptable. I won’t be able to handle it.”

She needed to let him win this one. Her goal was for him to
take her to the heart of the Harbingers of Sorrow. The casino had served its
purpose. “I’ll call in sick today, and quit next week.”

“Thank you.”

She disappeared into the bedroom. Jagger pulled out his
phone.

“Dom, I need you to do me a favor…can you…clean up the
place? I’m going to bring Britton by tonight, but I need to ease her into all
of it. Just have all the guys there and on their best behavior…Thank you so
much…Yes; I want you to be the first one she sees…I’ll see you tonight thanks
bro.”

He hung up the phone and looked around. Things were falling
into place, but they were falling fast. He needed to make sure he still had
control. What if Britton freaked out? What if she stormed out on him and went
straight to the authorities? No, she wouldn’t do that: not with Dominic there. No
matter how strong her reservations were toward him, she could never hurt her
brother. He was sure it was going to all work out. Now he just needed to deal
with David.