Damaged Goods (25 page)

there?”

“Don"t know.” I grasped his shirt and pulled him closer to me. “You tell me.”

122

Lauren Gallagher

Chapter Sixteen

Austin"s schedule was tricky to plan around, mostly owing to the fact that

there
was
no schedule. He had set days during the week when he"d turn off his work

phone and be unavailable, but on the days when that phone was on, it was anyone"s

guess when it would ring. When it did, the resulting client session could be days

away or, as he"d warned me up front, within hours.

That meant, of course, there were times when he had to cancel some plans

with me at the last minute to go to work.

Go to work. That was such a benign way to phrase it. Anyone would think I

meant he was dropping into the office for some overtime, or going in to get a

network back online, or seeing a client in the more socially acceptable sense of the

phrase. Something other than apologizing profusely, kissing me good-bye, and

leaving to go fuck another woman.

Every time he did, I talked myself into believing it didn"t bother me, but lately,

I"d had a hard time convincing myself of that. Each time that phone rang, it wore

me down a little more, and when it rang tonight, whether I wanted to admit it or

not, it bothered me. A lot.

I hadn"t said a word to him about it. I wanted to believe I could get over it. I

wanted to believe that as much as I wanted to believe what we had was more than

just a desperate need to cling to someone who didn"t see me as damaged goods. Was

I sticking around because I really wanted to be with Austin, or because I was afraid

no one else would want to be with me?

Fuck, I’m going to drive myself insane.

If I thought about it enough, I was sure I
would
drive myself insane, so as soon

as his car had pulled out of my driveway, I focused my energy on finding the nearest

available way to
not
think about where he"d gone. Some company and some alcohol

seemed like a good distraction, so I called Janie. She was out with her other half,

though, so I tried Kim to see if she minded me tagging along at the last minute. Of

course she didn"t mind. She was always game for more company. That, and we

hadn"t seen each other in quite some time. We"d e-mailed, but as far as getting

together, she"d been busy and, well, since I"d met Austin, so had I.

“Absolutely!” she"d practically squealed into the phone. “Long time no see, so

it"ll be good to hang out.” Her other two friends, Jackie and Tina, would be joining

her at a velvet-rope nightclub downtown, so she promised to save me a seat and

have a mojito waiting for me.

Damaged Goods

123

Little black dress, dab of makeup, and I was on my way.

Two things didn"t occur to me until the cab had dropped me off, I"d paid the

cover, and Kim had already spotted me from across the room.

One, she was the one who"d referred me to Elite Escorts in the first place.

Two, the woman didn"t have a discreet bone in her body.

“Hey, you,” she said when I took a seat beside her at their booth. As promised,

my mojito awaited, but before I"d even taken a deliciously alcoholic swallow, Kim

said, “So did you ever take my advice?”

I forced myself not to choke on my drink. “What?”

“You know what I"m talking about.” She elbowed me. “Did you call the

agency?”

Across the table, Jackie"s eyes lit up. “Oh? You"re getting in on them too?”

“Another member of the club,” Tina said. “Welcome to the Elite Escort

connoisseurs.”

Oh. Fuck.

I took another drink, then cleared my throat. “Well, I…um…”

“Come on,” Kim said. “Spill it. I want to know.” She smirked like she could see

right through me. “You haven"t complained about bad sex or no sex in your e-mails

recently, so I"m guessing either you called or you"ve found a man. Which is it?”

How about both?

My cheeks betrayed me. With the heat beneath my skin, there was no way my

complexion had remained an unincriminating shade, especially not when Kim

squealed and grabbed my hand.

“Ooh! You did! So how was it? Who"d you get?”

My eyes darted toward other girls at the table, and they had the same “you

did, didn"t you?” expressions.

Jackie grinned over her cosmopolitan. “Yeah, come on, tell us.”

“Wait,” I said. “You"ve all really used Elite Escorts? Seriously?”

“Of course we have.” Jackie clicked her tongue. “Sweetie, we work as many

hours as you do, and dating"s a pain in the ass.”

“Amen,” Tina said. “I"ll be forty in two weeks. I may not be able to find a man

who"s worth keeping, but at least I"m still getting some.”

I stared into my mojito. Couldn"t imagine why these three were all single. But

then, so was I, at least until recently. Until I"d resorted to it out of desperation,

which became a habit, which oddly enough resulted in a relationship, which was

exactly why I was here tonight, which—

I downed the second half of my drink in one swallow.

“So, give us details,” Kim said.

“Oh, um, it was…” I paused, clearing my throat. “It was worth the money.”

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Lauren Gallagher

All three of them laughed.

“With those boys, I don"t think it"s possible for it not to be worth the money,”

Kim said.

“I"ll drink to that,” Jackie said.

“Me too.” Tina paused. “Well, at least now that Mario is gone.”

Kim wrinkled her nose. “Oh, God, he was a dud.”

“Never used him,” Jackie said.

“You"re lucky,” Tina muttered. “One and only time I ever asked for my money

back.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Okay, I"m curious. How often
do
you all use the

agency?”

“Every time I get an alimony check.” Tina grinned and raised her glass in a

mock salute. “Dale decided to cheat, so now he"s paying for me to get some action.”

And here I"d felt like an addict for my four paid sessions with Sabian.

“Must be nice,” Jackie said. “Ever since I moved into the new condo, my play

money has pretty much dried up.”

“Had to settle for dating normal guys, then?” Kim asked.

Jackie rolled her eyes and nodded. “Unfortunately.” With a wistful sigh, she

added, “I miss my boy toys.”

My stomach turned. This was a mistake. Of all the places I could have gone

tonight to forget what my boyfriend did for a living, I"d plunked myself right in the

middle of three regular customers for Elite Escorts. Oh, God, what if one of them

had been with Sabian?

I shuddered and flagged down the cocktail waitress for an emergency mojito.

Oh, but the girls weren"t done yet.

“So, who did you get?” Kim asked me. “You still haven"t told us.”

“I, um.” I gulped, glancing around for the nearest exit. “I don"t remember his

name, to be honest.”

“You don"t remember?” Tracy snickered. “He didn"t make much of an

impression, then?”

He made an impression, all right
. “I, well, it"s been a while now. A few weeks. I

just can"t remember his name.”

“Well, what did he look like?” Jackie asked. “Obviously he was hot, ripped, and

well-endowed, or he wasn"t with Elite Escorts.” All three of them laughed, and my

stomach turned. They saw this as some kind of female bonding thing, a dirty little

secret we all shared, something to giggle over like schoolgirls. Maybe it would have

been if things hadn"t turned out the way they had with Austin, but now this was a

conversation I just couldn"t stomach.

Coming out here tonight was definitely not a good idea. I needed my drink. Or

a quick escape. Or both. A mojito to go.

Damaged Goods

125

Kim elbowed me again. “Come on, come on, spill it, woman.”

“Oh, um, he was…” I cleared my throat. “Definitely hot.”

“Definitely wasn"t Max, then.” Kim laughed. “You"d remember him, believe me.

Hot doesn"t even begin to describe him. That man is the living definition of the

Italian stallion.
Rawr
.”

“Or Curtis. He is, and will always be, my favorite.” Tracy fanned herself. “The

things he can do with his mouth, Lord have mercy.”

Kim laughed. “You
obviously
haven"t spent enough time with Sabian then.”

My mouth went dry, and my throat closed around my breath. The waitress was

a saint, because she arrived right then with my drink. While I tried to drown myself

in the alcohol, my companions went on.

“Oh, Sabian"s good with his mouth,” Jackie said with all the matter-of-factness

of someone who had no clue she was talking about someone else"s boyfriend.
Oh,

God, this is too weird for words
. “But nowhere near as good as Xander.”

“No no no.” Kim shook her head and gestured with her drink. “Xander"s good,

I"ll give you that. But Sabian? He could give lessons on eating pussy.”

I swallowed the bile rising in my throat.

“Well, to each her own,” Jackie said. “And even if he"s not as good as Xander

with his mouth, Sabian"s got them all beat with what he"s got in his pants.”

I’m going to be sick. Any second. I’m going to be sick.

“He certainly lasts longer than most,” Tina said. “Though Daren gives him a

run for his money.”

“God, yes, he does.” Kim whistled. “He has to be on something, I swear it. No

man has endurance like that without taking something.”

Jackie grinned and picked up her drink. “He can take whatever he wants, as

long as he keeps doing what he does.”

“I thought Heath and Sabian were both taking pills,” Tina said. “But no way.

They can both practically come on command. No way a guy on Viagra can do that.”

Stop. Stop. Please. All of you. Just shut up.

God, how did I end up in this twilight zone? At a table with three women who"d

had sex with my boyfriend. Listening to them compare notes. While he was out.

While he was out with a client doing God only knew what while I tried to drown in a

drink.

Right this second, he could be going down on her. Or fucking her. Or—

I “accidentally” bumped my mostly full glass, tipping it into my lap. “Oh, shit!”

I flew upright, brushing ice and mint leaves off my skirt. “I"d better go clean this up.

I"ll, um, be right back.” I grabbed my purse off the bench and barely kept myself

from sprinting across the club to the restroom.

Since it was early yet and the crowd was still light, the restroom was

mercifully empty. I pulled a few paper towels from the dispenser and pretended not

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Lauren Gallagher

to notice the way my hands shook while I cleaned off my clothes. Sponging off my

dress with a wadded paper towel gave me something to do, at least. Something

besides grabbing on to the sink and staring into my own reflection, demanding

answers to the millions of questions running through my brain. That or darting into

one of the stalls to heave a few times.

I thought I was okay with this. I thought I could handle being with an escort.

Jesus, who are you kidding, Jocelyn? An escort? He’s a prostitute. A gigolo. A whore
.

The man sold sex like I sold advertising deals. And I was fooling myself into

believing I could deal with sharing him with anyone with the cash to pay his price.

What was I thinking?

The restroom door opened, letting some of the thumping music from the club

spill in before it shut with a dull thud and cut off the noise. Stiletto heels clunked on

the tile floor.

“You okay, hon?” Kim asked.

No. No, I’m not okay. My boyfriend’s…out there. Somewhere. He’s…goddammit,

he’s fucked
you.
And Jackie. And Tina.

I clenched my jaw to keep the rising nausea at bay. “I"m fine.”

“You sure? You look pale as hell.”

I glanced in the mirror. It just figured a place like this was posh enough to

have warm, incandescent lighting in the bathrooms instead of harsh fluorescents.

At least the latter would have been an easy scapegoat for my pallor.

“I"m, I guess, just not used to everyone being so…candid.” I swallowed. “About

their sex lives.”

Kim cocked her head. “But we always talk like that.”

“Right. Right.” I shifted my weight. “But it"s different now for some reason. I

don"t know exactly why.”
Liar, liar, booze-drenched skirt on fire.

“Probably a little weird realizing we"ve all fished from the same pond, I guess.”

That didn"t help my nausea. At all. “Something like that,” I muttered.

“Honestly, hon, it"s not that big of a deal.”

I took a deep breath. It was a big deal. Jesus, if she had a clue.

Fuck it, if anyone in my world wouldn"t be judgmental of my choice in men, it

would be her. Michael was quite a bit more conservative than Kim, after all,

particularly when it came to all things sexual, and even he hadn"t taken it as badly

as I"d thought he would. Kim, sexually liberated as she was, stood a good chance of

being at least somewhat receptive to my unorthodox situation. Someone who