Dare (29 page)

“More like get your heart ripped out. Shredded might be a better word.”

“Look, she’s the first person I’ve even thought about caring about since—” I hated talking about it in front of him. “Since, you know—since you. She’s different.”

“Oh, I know she’s different. I just don’t think you realize it yet.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” I didn’t like him taking jabs at Dare. “Fill me in for once and stop with the damn riddles.”

“You actually have the answers on this one, man. You’re just too blind to see it.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

He stood to leave.

“Don’t go, Blake. We can talk about something else. You choose. Come on, man.”

“It’s not up to me. You know that. I said what I was supposed to and now it’s time. I’ll see you next time.” He walked away, leaving me with my feet hanging off the ledge and his empty beer bottle.

It always ended the same way. He left before I was ready for him to go. But that was always going to be the case. It had been five years, but it always felt exactly like this. Like I had lost my twin brother all over again.

V
ix lined them up in order. “It won’t hurt that much.” She coaxed them to wait their turn.

“How many stars do we need to get?” one of the initiatives asked.

It was a confusing question. There had been seven Nox, and with the new five that made twelve, but Sloan was planning her wedding and I had no idea what was happening with Tegan or Eva.

“Twelve,” I answered. “There are twelve Nox. We all need twelve stars.”

I swore to Sloan I would help her. I wasn’t giving up on her no matter what connection she had with Ronan. The wedding invitation had arrived while I was in Tennessee. It was edged in gold and the font was modern and bold—all the things this sham of a wedding wasn’t.

The tattoo artist looked up from where he was cleaning Bey’s neck. He had done the artwork for all of us. He went by Chill, but there was no way that was his real name.

“This is going to take a little while.” Chill started behind Bey’s ear. She looked calm. I knew she was a strong panther.

Vix assessed the new girls. “I’m going to call Jason. I’ll be right back. I don’t want to lose my spot in line.” She smirked.

We had taken over the tattoo parlor. Anyone who walked in would know right away it would be a few hours before Chill could take another client. But this was part of Nox initiation.

I waited my turn. The five new stars meant we were stronger. We were growing in number. I wasn’t going to let Case’s threats tear apart what I had built. I was determined to bring Sloan back, and with Ian’s help, I knew eventually we would rescue the other girls. I wasn’t giving up. I’d never give up on my friends.

Maybe it wasn’t the most regal thing to do, but I left the new Nox with Vix and Maya for the first half of the night. I knew they would make sure they were settled in the lair. They didn’t need me hovering.

I bent down to pick up the key from under the mat, but straightened it out with my foot instead. I knocked on the door.

Zac opened it just before I knocked a second time.

“Hey.” I stepped inside.

“Hey. How was your trip?” He walked over to the couch and hit mute on the remote. The baseball game went silent.

“It was good. Great, actually.”

It felt awkward standing in the living room. I regretted taking off without letting him know beforehand, but that was the course my life was on—a course that pulled me in two different directions. One kept my focus on the Nox and the other pulled me here.

“Want something to drink? Or did you want to try to get a session in?” He moved toward the kitchen.

“You said you wanted to see me. So, here I am.”

“Oh God, the drunk dialing. Yeah, that wasn’t cool. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” My heart almost stopped when I caught his eyes locked on my lips.

“Actually, I kind of liked it.”

“You did?”

“Yeah, I did.” I ran my bottom lip under my teeth.

I stepped closer to him. I wanted to throw my arms around his neck. I hesitated. I wondered if he was annoyed with my road trip, or if I had played it so cool that he didn’t know I had a full-blown out-of-control crush.

I inhaled, my chest moving with my breaths. This was torture.

He caught my wrist as if we were sparring, pulling me close to his chest. I held my breath. “I meant every single drunk word last night. I missed you. I missed these green eyes of yours. I missed your voice. I missed your lips.”

I thought about saying all the same things about how I thought about him when I was driving. How I wondered what he was doing all weekend. How I wanted to fall asleep next to him, with my head on his chest, but he didn’t let me utter a single word.

His mouth covered mine and I couldn’t think. I forgot all the words and all the things I wanted to tell him.

I clung to him, my lips feverish for the way he kissed me. It was like the first time we kissed, but deeper, more powerful.

This was everything I had been fighting for. The right to choose whom I wanted to be with. The right to fall in love with the perfect man. A gorgeous, sexy, smart-as-hell, adventurous man. This man.

I pulled him tighter, our mouths moving frantically. His tongue dipping against mine. I savored the beer on his lips. He groaned against my throat, his mouth covering my skin.

“What’s this?” He pulled back, his eyes focused on my neck.

“I got a few new stars today. Does it look terrible?” My hair covered the five new stars until he had swept it off my shoulder. The stars had started to trail farther along my neck.

“No, it looks hot.” He kissed gently by my collarbone. “Does it hurt?”

“Not when you do that.” I smiled.

“How about when I do this?” He kissed the other side.

“No.” I closed my eyes. His mouth moved along my shoulder, pressing kisses into my skin.

“And here?” He tilted my chin toward him, kissing the base of my throat.

I kept the purrs within, but I wanted him to know how good it all felt. Just being here with him.

My eyes opened and he cupped my face with his hands. “I want you.”

My breath was ragged and rough. My head was spinning.

“I want to take you to my bed and show you just how much I want you. How much I missed you. How much I fucking need you. Are you ok with that?”

My legs shook for a second. Long enough that I knew I didn’t want to say no. Everything in my body wanted a taste of him too. I had always wanted it.

I nodded.

His room was dark and the sheets cool as he laid me on his bed. I didn’t think about what was going on outside of the house. For the night, I let myself believe that the world was in perfect order and that I deserved the perfect guy.

Vix would take care of the initiates, and Maya would make sure Abi ate and slept. Ian would keep an eye on the locator map. The stars would glitter over the city, and everyone was safe for one night. It was all I needed. One night.

Tonight I would let Zac keep me safe. I would let down my guard, and let him in.

I stretched out next to Zac. I liked watching him sleep. I studied the way his muscles connected. The strength in his arms, the sharp cut of his jaw. The only problem with him sleeping was I couldn’t look in his blue eyes.

There were hues of blue I didn’t even know how I loved. Cobalt when he was serious. Aqua when he was making a joke. And sky blue when we were training. I had memorized all the shades. I couldn’t help it.

The sun peeked in through the blinds. I had never stayed all night anywhere. I had missed patrol.

I pulled the sheet away, but before I could get a foot on the floor, his arm circled my waist, drawing me against his chest.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He nuzzled in my neck.

“I have to get home. Vix is going to worry.”

“Send her a text.” His fingers ran along my hipbone, dipping farther each time.

Staying overnight was unusual, staying in bed long enough for morning sex was unheard of.

He rolled on top of me, pinning me underneath him. I moaned as he rocked against me. I could resist a lot of things, but this was impossible. He kissed my throat and the new stars behind my ear, each time pressing harder until I couldn’t resist anymore. I needed to feel all of him. I rose to meet him, taking him deep. It wasn’t like last night.

Our bodies slowed, knowing how good it felt the deeper we went. The urgency had been replaced by the need to savor the way his skin felt sliding against mine. The way I arched into him when he looked into my eyes, the way I was falling harder than I ever had before.