Dare Me Forever (12 page)

He stopped kissing me
and looked me right in the eyes, getting the point. I could see his
gaze harden as he tried to play it cool.

“I need to get going
anyway, do some work for tomorrow. See you around.” His tone of
voice said it all. I guess he didn’t really care about being
friends. It was just a ruse to get me into bed. He just thought I was
easy.

Humiliation washed over
me, hot and sticky like old honey. I could feel myself blushing as I
slowly opened the car door. This was why I could never trust him. He
always played with people like this—dangled an opportunity in front
of them and snatched it away the moment they reached for it. I took a
breath of the cool, calming sea air as I shut the car door.

I turned my head back
to him, and again our eyes found each other. I was no longer the same
girl he knew inside and out in high school. And I didn’t need any
of his shit.

Amy

After the embarrassment
of the night before, I was eager to get to back to the store and lose
myself in work. I couldn’t even tell Jamie about the date, or
whatever it was--I’d been too mortified by Hunter’s attitude. I
wasn’t some booty call. I decided to try and forget about it. I was
seeing Ryan the next day and he was the real deal.

What I needed was a
girl’s night out. I quickly texted both Jamie and Cat, and turned
on my “Relax” playlist. I wanted to push the negatives thoughts
out of my mind and focus on the calligraphy for the wedding
invitations I needed to finish.

As Bon Iver played
through the speakers, my phone beeped. Jaime was in. A few seconds
later, it beeped again, but instead of Cat’s name popping up, it
was Ryan. I opened it. It was just one sentence, short and
to-the-point, but enough to send a thrill of excitement down my
spine.

I’m excited about
dinner Saturday night.

I couldn’t hide my
grin. If someone had come into the store right then, they’d think I
didn’t have a brain, my smile was so wide.

After the disaster that
was yesterday, it was such a relief to know someone was looking
forward to having a date with me. My pull to Ryan was like nothing
I’d ever experienced. Maybe that was a bad thing, though. Maybe I
shouldn’t so easily surrender to that pull. But if I didn’t go
out with him, I’d feel like a total loser. What kind of person
doesn’t go out with someone because she’s
too
attracted to
him?

I decided to wait until
mid-morning to write him back. He didn’t need to know how eager I
was, he didn’t need to know I was totally agonizing over this,
basically counting the minutes until I could see him next. Let him
think I was too busy to answer.

A few minutes later,
the door jingled, and one of the pretty women who had sat at her
table at the fundraiser walked in.

With a huge smile on
her face, she reintroduced herself. “Hi, not sure you remember me.
I’m Violet, we met at the school fundraiser a few days ago?” It
wasn’t a question but she phrased it like one, raising her tone and
cocking her head to the side at the end of her sentence.

“Of course I
remember,” I said swiftly. “You were interested in invitations
for your son’s christening.” I said a silent prayer that she
hadn’t noticed Ryan nearly bringing me to a release at a table full
of people.

“Good memory.”
Violet grinned. As we went through the different options for color,
trim, type, and grade of paper, Violet entertained me by confessing
how boring she thought events like the fundraiser and other
networking political events were. “You have to buy a new dress for
every single dinner,” she said, flicking through cardstock options.
“Plus, speaking to the same boring politicians over and over…”

I smiled in response.
Since I didn’t have many opportunities to get dressed up, I’d had
a good time. Although my date and his hands had a lot to do with
that.

As Violet went through
the typography in one of my books, hesitating a moment before she
asked “So, are you dating Ryan Anderson?” So that was the real
reason she had come into the store. She tried to make her face look
passive, unimpressed, but the intent in her eyes betrayed her. It was
obvious she desperately wanted to know. I blushed. “You know,”
Violet added, “he is one of the most eligible bachelors around--and
the most ruthless businessmen.”

I wasn’t sure quite
what that meant. Was she implying he was a player? Or was it just his
wealth that made him so “eligible?” And ruthless? I knew he was
serious about business, and I’d seen firsthand how uptight he could
get about work, and okay, I guess he was also arrogant about some of
the deals he’d made--but
ruthless
? I didn’t know what to
say. Should I defend him?
Was
I dating him? Didn’t you have
go out a few times to be official? And did I really want to announce
to someone I barely knew who I was or wasn’t dating? Because of who
Ryan was, it seemed like the rules of dating were different.

Violet pushed on,
apparently oblivious to the questions zooming through my head like
racecars, “I mean he has it all, right?” She smiled sweetly,
retying her hair into a low ponytail as she talked. “Hot, sexy,
handsome, and incredibly successful. But you probably don’t need me
to point that out.”

Maybe she didn’t mean
any harm by asking, I told myself as I smiled along with her. Most
women who knew or saw Ryan probably admired him, if only for his
looks. She probably just wanted to connect with me. But that still
didn’t mean I was going to tell this woman how I felt about him.

This conversation was
making me feel slightly territorial. And totally embarrassed. I tried
my best to stay calm. Flashing Violet a coy and relaxed grin, I
finally answered, “We’ll see.” It was the truth. Maybe the
attraction I felt between Ryan and me wasn’t more than a passing
feeling. Maybe he wouldn’t be interested in me after our next
dinner date. Maybe I wouldn’t be interested in him. Though
something in the back of my mind—maybe the lingering memory of our
first date on the beach—made me doubt that very much. Not to
mention, our hot night after the fundraiser.

I was happy that I was
going out with Jamie and hopefully Cat tonight. It was a lot better
than sitting at home obsessing over the weekend’s upcoming date.

As I recorded the
information Violet wanted on her invitations, she seemed to finally
get the hint and stopped asking about Ryan. I helped her finish up
her invites and we agreed I’d have them to her to proof in a week.
And she promised to send all of her friends to the shop. I was glad I
hadn’t come off as bitchy. I wasn’t, but I was private,
especially when I didn’t even know where my feelings were, or where
I stood.

Amy

Sipping my gin and
tonic, I looked across the table towards my two friends, and then out
to the ocean. We hadn’t met up for drinks in ages. With the opening
of my new store, Jaime’s crazy hostess schedule at the new and
upscale Fig restaurant, and Cat’s insanely long hours at the real
estate management company, it was hard to find a time when all three
of us were available. Jamie and Cat are so awesome--it was always
great to be with these two. They were zany and fun, and I loved them.

When I first met Cat in
college, we immediately clicked. We were in this outrageous costume
design course that was supposed to be taught by a once famous
Broadway costumer. He was the teacher all right, but unfortunately so
stuck in the 1980s, the height of his hey-day, that only gold or
skin-tight over the top sequin bodysuits were sacrosanct. So
basically we’d spend the whole semester making costumes that would
blend in perfectly to the ensemble of
Cats
.

Being with Cat and
Jaime should have taken my mind off Ryan but my brain wouldn’t let
it rest. I kept imagining his lips against mine, trailing down my
body, grabbing, taking, dominating. I could still feel the way his
hands felt on the inside of my thighs.

“Earth to Amy.”
Jamie waved her fingers in front of me. “Um, hello? So what
happened the other night with Ryan?”

Cat turned towards
Jamie, her eyes widening. “Did Amy tell you what he looks like? A
fucking rock star. He is so unbelievably hot. When are you gonna give
us the details?”

I didn’t know what to
say. That I’ve never met someone I was so attracted to? That for
all his businessman seriousness and sometimes superior demeanor, I
have, like, the world’s biggest crush? I wasn’t ready to tell
them—not yet. I didn’t want to put all of my eggs in one basket.

“It wasn’t anything
special. You know, just a date or two with Ryan Anderson,” I said.

Cat threw her hands up
in the air—one of her trademark over-the-top but endearing
gestures. “
What
? The guy we saw on the hike was
the
Ryan Anderson?” She was practically squealing. “He’s trying to
buy the company where I work. He’s like the richest, most
inscrutable businessmen out there! Everything he touches turns to
gold. No one knows what his secret is, how he got so good.”

I knew he was
rich--hell I’d been in his car--but I had no idea he was so well
known. Jaime looked over at me wryly and smiled.

“Guess Amy and I
aren’t quite in the same orbit as you Cat. At least I had no idea
he was mega wealthy.”

“Me neither,” I
sighed. Now I was falling for someone who was too handsome, too
smart, and too rich. I didn’t have a problem with people having
money, but I’d always had to work hard for mine and I wasn’t sure
I could be with someone who didn’t know what it meant to clean your
own bathroom.

“Okay, okay,” I
said, placing my drink down on the table. “Enough about me. Cat,
tell us about your man.” I didn’t want them to spend the whole
time focusing on my love life. In fact, I didn’t feel like talking
about me at all. I was too confused to be able to explain it. And Cat
always had the best men stories—the latest flirtation with her
co-worker’s boss kept Jaime and me entranced for months: first the
shared touch over a paper-clip, which escalated to some side to side
contact during a meeting when they were seated next to each other on
the couch. With our encouragement, Cat dropped subtle (or
not-so-subtle) hints about her break-up, her weekend plans, and
finally he’d taken the hint.

They’d been together
non-stop for the last month doing it all over the office. Last week
was his desk, the week before the bathroom. They were checking off
each room in the whole building. Not my style, but hey, Cat likes to
live on the edge.

“Cat, you are going
to get rug burn,” Jaime said laughing. She should know—the two of
them were active daters, and always on my case about getting coochie
cobwebs. At least now, they could back off.

When I asked Jaime
about her latest conquests, she shrugged. She’d been seeing that
hot bartender at the restaurant, but apparently he was an alcoholic
and not so good the morning after.

“There is this guy
who has been coming in a lot lately, usually after work with some
co-workers, or for dinner with friends. Doesn’t seem like he is
dating anyone and he’s always super cute, complimenting my outfits,
but he hasn’t made any moves.” She made a face as she took a sip
of her Mai Tai. “So it’s a dry spell for me.”

I snorted. “A dry
spell? I don’t think it can be considered dry unless you’ve gone
without for at least longer than a week.”

The girls laughed.
Jaime wasn’t what you’d call easy; she preferred to call herself
proactive, she knew what—or more accurately, who—she wanted and
would do what she could to get it. I sure hoped she and Cat were
rubbing off on me. I looked at my two closest friends and felt so
lucky. I don’t know what I would do without them.

Two women walked past,
and sat down at the table next to us. My gaze slid over to them as I
took a long sip of my drink. One of them was familiar, but who was
it? I put my drink down, and suddenly the realization hit me. It was
Jennifer, Hunter’s ex from the barbeque.

I didn’t want to be a
jerk and we’d definitely already made eye contact, so I turned
towards her table.

“Hi Jennifer, we met
at the Morgan’s barbeque. Jamie was there,” I said gesturing
across our table to her. “And this is Cat.”

“Annie was it?” she
asked, not taking her eyes off the menu. She couldn’t even
pretend
to be friendly? I thought as I stirred the ice in my cup a little too
hard. It was okay to forget my name, but her tone of voice was like
hell frozen over.

“Amy,” I said,
ignoring her bitchy attitude. “Well I don’t want to interrupt you
two. Nice to see you again.” Without saying another word, she
turned back towards her friend, effectively dismissing me. Cat
grinned, as Jamie rolled her eyes. I didn’t care.

I’d wanted to talk to
them a little about my feelings for Ryan. But there was no way I
could do that now. Anyway, I should probably sit with it on my own
first. I hoped there could be a future with Ryan, and I couldn’t
deny the incredible chemistry between us, but to be totally honest,
it scared me. It made me feel out of control, like I was hurtling
down a ski slope with no way to stop myself. If Ryan wasn’t there
to catch me, I don’t know what would happen.

And I wanted to tell
them about what had happened with Hunter. But I felt strange even to
be thinking about him, this close to Jennifer. And I was upset that
he’d gotten under my skin at all. I didn’t want to harbor any
feelings towards him. He could still make me so angry, and that he
could evoke such intense feelings in me, further pissed me off.

I just needed to have
this next date with Ryan and get over my fear of being too captivated
by him.

The girls were a
welcome distraction, but I couldn’t get my mind off of him and what
might happen with us.