Authors: Amanda Meredith
Tags: #Fiction, #Retail, #Romance, #Suspense, #Thrillers
I
was wheeled into a room that looked a lot like the one I had been in at Ramstein. The room was dark, which my eyes rejoiced at. Libby’s face was pale and yellowed bruises covered her neck and arms.
John Paul left me alone after steering me to the bed. At first, I could only weep as I held her limp hand. I
couldn’t control my thoughts, my emotions. I had thought she was dead. Now she lay before me, broken and helpless… but she was alive. I angrily pushed away the tears and took a slow breath. When my eyes were dry, I began to tell Libby about our children.
I told her how they looked like her, how strong and healthy they were. I told her that she needed to wake up because I
wouldn’t name them until she did.
“We can’t keep calling them boy and girl, Libby,” I joked but ended up crying again because there was a real chance that she never would wake up.
A while later, Dr. Crawford came in to talk to me about Libby.
“When she arrived she was unconscious and hemorrhaging severely. Aside from minor injuries to the head and torso, she was bleeding internally. The surgical team was on stand-by and she went straight to the OR when she arrived. The babies’ heart rates were dropping and Libby was losing large amounts of blood. Even though she was only 35 weeks, we had no choice but to perform an emergency C-Section. We had the babies safely out in less than six minutes. They had no trouble breathing as I’m sure John Paul told you,” he smiled a little. “It’s always a good sign when they can cry without even being suctioned. They were taken straight to the Neo-Natal Unit and we started working on Libby.” He paused, taking a seat next to me.
“Her heart stopped twice during surgery, Cole.” I sucked in a breath and had to close my eyes to stop the room from spinning. “She had two large ruptures in her uterus and a tear in her spleen. We removed the spleen and were able to stop the hemorrhaging very quickly. There is severe scarring on her uterus and still a very real risk of her developing an infection.” He paused and ran a hand down his face. “She won’t be able to have any more children without risking her own life, Cole,” he explained, sorrow filling his voice. “And that’s only if she gets through recovery without any more hemorrhaging or infections. There’s still a chance that we’ll have to do a hysterectomy.”
“Is that what you’re recommending?” I
asked, my voice barely audible.
“Ten years ago, we would’ve gone straight to that option.
But treatment for uterine ruptures has advanced so much. It’s still a very real possibility that we’ll have no choice. It depends on Libby’s recovery.”
“I understand Dr. Crawford.” I looked back at Libby, watching her chest rise and fall with the respirator.
“I wish I had better news for you Cole but Libby and your children are alive. Things could’ve been so much worse.”
“Yeah, they almost were, Doc.” I answered and reached out to shake his hand. “Thank you.” He left the room and I turned back to Libby, picking up her limp fingers. This must have been how she’d felt when I had been injured.
Helpless, scared, hoping for something, anything. A twitch of a finger, a flutter of an eyelid. But nothing moved.
I tried to remember what it had been like for me when
I'd been trapped in that empty void. All I could remember was hearing Libby’s voice from the darkness. She had sat with me, talked to me, helped pull me from the black. Now it was my turn to do the same for her.
I dutifully returned to my room when ordered and ran the gamut of tests. Other than being in a lot of pain and still having some sensitivity to light, I was on the mend. I convinced the doctor to allow me to return to Libby after only a few hours.
John Paul joined me, looking just as haggard as I felt. One of the nurses had tried to make me leave after visiting hours were over but I steadfastly refused. John Paul refused to leave as well.
“Tell me what happened, John Paul.” I asked when
we’d sat in silence for a while. He tensed but didn’t answer right away.
“You were there, Cole. Don’t you remember?” He finally answered.
“I’m not talking about the night Jackson took Libby.” I told him. “You’re Libby’s real father.” He sucked in a breath and stood. He paced the room with his hands in his pockets.
“Who told you?” When he finally spoke, his voice shook.
“The man I thought
was
her father.” I watched his face pale. “I should’ve figured it out on my own. You were always there. The concerts, plays, softball games. You even showed up at the PTA meetings. Every time she got in trouble or hurt, you just happened to be there.” I shook my head as it all became clear. “She has your eyes.” John Paul stopped pacing. His shoulders slumped and he turned back towards me. His face was pale as he slowly walked back to the chair.
“Why didn’t you ever do anything?” I murmured. “All those years, everyone knew what was going on. Why didn’t you stop him?” John Paul slumped into the chair, tears escaping from his eyes.
“It’s not easy to explain. I’d have to start at the beginning,” his voice cracked, full of emotion.
“Tell me.”
“I met Carol Ann in 1983,” He murmured. “She’d just moved here with her parents from South Carolina
that spring. She’d gotten a job at the Ice Cream Shack for the summer. She was the prettiest girl I’d ever seen.” He sighed. “I think I loved her from the moment I first saw her.” I smiled, knowing exactly how that felt.
“One day, instead of ordering ice cream, I got up enough courage to ask her out. She was eighteen, and since she
hadn’t gone to school here, she didn’t know anybody. She blushed and agreed so I took her to the movies that night. We spent the entire summer together. I had just turned twenty and had been accepted into the police academy in Louisville. I was supposed to leave that fall. I wanted to marry her but I didn’t have a job, a place of my own. I needed to go to the academy, graduate and be able to take of her.” He sighed again, scrubbing a hand down his face.
“Over the summer, I’d seen Jackson following her around. He was a
scrawny kid, a year younger than me. He worked at the mine. The whole town knew his Pa was a drunk. His Momma had died giving birth to him and his Pa spent the rest of his life beating the shit out of him for it. Everyone wanted to feel sorry for him, try and help him out, especially when he was young, but the way he looked at you... like there wasn’t a soul behind those eyes, made people steer clear of him.”
“When he was sixteen, they found his Pa dead. Thought
he’d finally drunk himself to death until they released the autopsy report. Snakebite.” John Paul waited while that information sunk in.
“You don’t think it was an accident.” It
wasn’t a question.
“I think Jackson killed his Pa.” John Paul muttered. “Of course they couldn’t prove anything. People
get bit by snakes all the time. And no one knew then what Jackson was really like.
Well, one night,
I’d gone to Carol Ann’s to pick her up for a date and saw Jackson outside. He’d been watching her change clothes through the window. I laid that bastard out so hard that he couldn’t go to work the next day. I found out soon enough that hitting him had only made it worse.
Anyway, the time came for me to leave for Louisville. Carol Ann wanted to come with but I
couldn’t bring her. I should’ve done whatever I could to have her with me. She’d still be alive if I had…” He swallowed. “I did propose to her before I left. Bought her a little gold ring and got down on one knee. She said yes.”
I looked down at Libby. She wore a
thin silver band on her right hand. Her Momma had given it to her for her sixteenth birthday. Libby hadn’t started wearing it until she’d moved out because Carol Ann had warned her that Jackson wouldn’t like it. John Paul had reached out and picked up Libby’s hand. His finger ran over the metal before he sighed and set it back on the bed.
“I told Carol Ann that I’d go to school, try and find a part-time job and an apartment. That I’d come back and get her over Christmas break.” John Paul shook his head sadly. “I called her every night but a few weeks before break she stopped answering the phone. When her Pa answered, he told me she
wasn’t there. When I came back after the semester ended, I found out that Carol Ann had married Jackson Michaels not three weeks earlier. I couldn’t understand it. That night, I bought a twelve pack and parked my truck at the ice cream shack. I was on my tenth beer when Carol Ann walked up. She was wearing a coat but I could tell. She was pregnant.”
I sucked in a breath. John Paul rubbed his fingers on his forehead as if he was trying to ward off a headache.
“I knew it was mine.” He continued bitterly. “She hadn’t said anything but I knew. I’d been her first and there was nobody else before I left. She was too far along for it to be Jackson’s. But I asked her who’s it was anyway because I was angry and a little drunk. She started bawling. You know I’m a sucker for tears. Mad as I was, I scooped her up and held her like I was never gonna let her go. She finally calmed down enough to tell me what had happened.” John Paul stopped and took a few deep breaths.
“She found out she was pregnant about a mon
th after I’d gone to Louisville. She was going to tell me but her Pa found out before she could. Her Pa was a self-righteous bastard and he locked Carol Ann in her bedroom. She couldn’t see anybody or use the phone. Her Pa only let her out to use the bathroom and to eat. She tried to run away once by climbing out the window but he found her and hit her hard enough she thought she might lose the baby. She didn’t try after that.”
“Jackson had gone to Car
ol Ann’s Pa, claiming he was the father of the baby. By that time, the whole town had heard about her ‘situation’ and her Pa was embarrassed. The next day, he took her to the county courthouse. She thought she was being forced into signing adoption papers for the baby until she saw Jackson standing by the judge. The judge started reading the vows and she tried to run out but her Pa grabbed her and slapped her so hard it made her nose bleed. She tried pleading with the judge, telling him that Jackson wasn’t the father, that she didn’t want to marry him but this is Kentucky and things were a lot different then. So she was forced to marry Jackson while blood dripped from her nose.” John Pauls’ fists were white from squeezing them so tightly.
“She had no idea what Jackson was like. I never even told her that
I’d caught him peeping in her window. She tried pleading with him as he drove her to his house. She thought he might’ve married her to try and save her from humiliation and her Pa’s anger. She told him they could get an annulment. That she just needed to call me and everything could get all sorted out. But he just smiled at her and told her that she belonged to him now. That he knew from the moment he saw her that she was supposed to be his.”
“By the time she’d gotten to this part of the story, I wanted to grab my gun and go shoot Carol Ann’s Pa and Jackson Michaels but Carol Ann wasn’t done telling me what had happened. The night they got married, he tried to force himself on her and she fought him.” John Paul’s voice cracked as he spoke. “He beat her until she begged him to stop. She told him
she’d do anything he wanted as long as he didn’t hurt her baby. He raped her while she cried.” John Paul broke down, unable to hold back his tears any longer. I gripped his shoulder, feeling him shake beneath my fingers.
“Why didn’t you kill him?” I whispered.
“I
wanted to, believe me,” he answered, shaking his head. “After Carol Ann told me her story, I opened up her coat and put my hands on her belly. I’d never been so happy in my life. My child was growing inside her. I felt it kick and my heart just stopped. But when she put her hands over mine, I saw someone else’s ring on her finger and God help me, I flinched. I made Carol Ann cry again and when she lifted her face to look at me, I could see bruises, shaped like fingers, around her neck. Her coat had hidden them. I pulled her coat down and found more bruises on her arms. Her wrists had barely healed scars, like she’d been tied…” he trailed off, shuddering.
“I swore to her that I’d make everything right. I was going to take her away, report the abuse,
have her file for divorce. Then Jackson drove up. He started screaming horrible things at Carol Ann the moment he got out of the truck and I just snapped. I went after him. Hit him so hard he fell into his truck and busted the headlight. I put my hands around his neck and started choking him.” John Paul’s hands were curled into claws in front of him, like Jackson was still between his fingers.
“Carol Ann ran between us to try and pull me off. She just wanted to get away. She
didn’t care if he was punished for what he did as long as the baby was safe. I took a step back and in that second, he had twisted her around and was pressing a knife into her belly. Against our baby. He told me that he’d kill her and the baby if I ever came near them again. I stepped towards them but he pushed the blade and Carol Ann screamed. I could see the blood welling up and soaking her shirt. He would’ve killed them.”
He took Carol Ann away and all I did was stand there and watch. I called the sheriff but he said there was nothing they could do unless Carol Ann pressed charges and filed a restraining order. There was no way Jackson would let her
live long enough to do either. She was afraid of him, of what he would do and so was I.”
“I went back to school, knowing I couldn’t even call her without putting her in danger. I asked my family to keep an eye out for her, let me know how she was doing.
But she never came to town anymore. I didn’t even know if she was still alive. I swore I’d become the sheriff one day, that I’d fix all the wrongs I’d done. That Jackson Michaels would face justice.” He took another deep breath.
“
I’d heard that Carol Ann had started coming to town, once a week to get groceries. That she dressed in long clothes, no matter the weather. That people could still see the bruises. I asked about the baby but no one ever saw Carol Ann with a child.” He sighed, sitting back in his chair. His eyes were swollen and bloodshot. “I came back when I was done with school and took the deputy position the minute I set foot back in town. Even though I was gettin’ ready to break the law and murder Jackson. I was willing to spend my life behind bars to set Carol Ann free.”
“So what happened?”
“I was driving up their lane when I saw a little girl playing in the yard. She would’ve been around four. She looked right at me and she was the spitting image of Carol Ann. But she had my eyes. I knew, without a doubt that she was mine. I sat there in my patrol car, bawling like a baby as I watched my daughter. I was even more determined to kill Jackson. Carol Ann walked out onto the porch when she saw my car coming. She was so skinny that I could see the bones sticking out from under her clothes. I almost didn’t recognize her. Her face had changed so much. When I was close enough for her to recognize me, what little color she had in her face disappeared. I parked in front of the porch and stepped out of the car. My eyes were locked with hers. I heard the door slam and watched as Jackson strolled onto the porch. He looked greasy and dirty and I could tell by the yellow tint on his skin that he was a heavy drinker. He grabbed Carol Ann’s ponytail and yanked her backwards. She cried out and I reached for my gun. He ordered her to get in the house and she obeyed without hesitation, though she looked back at me.”
“I damn near had my gun out. My hand was right over my holster but he called for the girl. Libby,
he’d called her. My hand froze. I’d had a sister named Elizabeth that had died young. I had told Carol Ann that we’d called her Libby. I glanced away from Jackson to my daughter and saw that she was shaking and pale as a sheet. She quickly darted up the porch stairs and into the house. I had a clear shot at him and I just stood there with my hand frozen at my holster. He just stared at me. He spit on the ground and turned around. He walked back into the house and I still hadn’t moved. He didn’t say anything to me but he didn’t have to. I knew he’d kill my daughter and Carol Ann if I ever tried to come near them again.” He stared down at his feet, taking deep slow breaths.
“You two were in pre-school together at that point. I asked your Pa about her since I knew he and your mother kept Libby afterschool most days. I was going to stop by the next day, just to see her again but she
wasn’t there. You were out in the yard playing and I asked you where Libby was.”
“And I told you she hadn’t been at school that day,” I whispered, remembering. “She didn’t come to school for over a week and when she finally came back she had stitches in her arm”
“The hospital report said she’d cut her arm helping her Momma do the dishes, But that’s not what happened. That sick bastard cut her arm to warn me. To show me what he was capable of. That’s why, all those years, I could never do anything. He would’ve killed them both if I tried. Then you changed it all by falling in love with my daughter.” He let that statement hang in the air.
I
couldn’t tell if he was happy by that fact. After all, the reason Carol Ann was dead was because she’d finally gotten up the courage to leave after I’d stepped up to the plate in keeping Libby safe. We sat in silence, watching Libby’s chest rise and fall.