Dark of the Moon (15 page)

I could tell he was shocked by my words.

“I can make it through this thing if I can look over and see you. I draw strength from your presence. And if they determine that I can’t be a Dark Guardian—and quite honestly I’d vote against me—I’ll survive. So think about your vote. Your dad’s right—it shouldn’t be based on emotion. The pack comes first.” I tucked the envelope behind his crossed arms.

As I walked out of the room, he didn’t say a word. And I knew he’d be there tomorrow, doing his duty as a Dark Guardian, determining my fate.

I wore black trousers, a black shirt, and a black jacket. I looked like someone preparing to go to a funeral. I just hoped it wasn’t my own.

My mom wanted to come with me, but I felt as though there were some things I needed to face alone. This was one of them. I’d always known my actions—claiming to be a Shifter when I wasn’t, sneaking into the treasures room, other lies and transgressions—came with consequences. Not to mention everything I’d told Mason. If anyone discovered the secrets I’d revealed…

I hadn’t told them about my trip to the white and black room, its décor so eerily symbolic. Good and evil.
Connor didn’t even know everything I’d told Mason, all that had transpired while I’d been away from him. But whatever my punishment was for any of my offenses, I was prepared to accept it. Given the choice, I knew I’d do them all again—especially the deals I’d made with Mason. To save Connor, I would have given up my life.

I drove Mom’s car to Wolford. We were going to go car shopping this afternoon—regardless of this morning’s outcome. Since she now had confirmation that I’d never be traveling on all fours, she’d decided I needed some wheels. I was okay with that.

Now I was waiting to be called into the council room. I paced in front of the door, trying not to think about what was going to happen on the other side. I’d prepared a little speech, but I thought I might hyperventilate before I could give it. It would be so much easier if they’d just let me wrestle for the right to remain a Guardian.

The door opened, and I swore it sounded like the report of a rifle.

Lucas came through looking as though his face had been set in stone this morning, and I realized this wasn’t any easier for them than it was for me. Why hadn’t I just faced the truth of my situation after the full moon? Why had I tried so hard to hide it? Secrets always came out.

“We’re ready for you,” he said solemnly.

With a nod, I followed him into the room and stood
in the designated spot. In front of me, the three elders sat at a table covered with a black cloth. Like judges, they wore black robes. Resting before Elder Wilde was a book I recognized—the book that housed the ancient text. So things were going to be pretty formal. I’d heard somewhere that in ancient days they’d thrown the guilty into a pit of real wolves. I was really hoping that wasn’t one of the ancient rituals they clung to.

Behind them was a large flat-screen TV. I had a feeling that didn’t bode well for me.

On either side of their table, at an angle, were two other long ones, also covered in black. Six guardians sat at one, five at the other. My stomach knotted up with the significance of the chair beside Connor being empty. I didn’t know if I’d ever wanted to sit beside him as much as I did right at that moment. For the first time in ages, his hair looked as though a comb, instead of his fingers, had gone through it. He had no stubble whatsoever adding shadow to his face. Like all the other guardians, he was dressed in black. As handsome as he appeared, I missed the rough, don’t-mess-with-me look that usually characterized him. My stomach fluttered just a bit as I envisioned him—polished and perfect—striding into a courtroom years from now.

Elder Wilde slammed a gavel on a slab of wood, and I jumped. I hadn’t been this unnerved facing Mason. But
then the only thing at risk had been my life. Right at that moment, I knew I could lose everything I treasured. Everything that made my life worth living.

“The tribunal will begin,” he said in a deep, sonorous voice that echoed off the walls, and made me think the reverberations would hang around for generations. “Guardian Reed, you have been brought before this tribunal because of actions and failures to act that cause us great concern regarding your ability to effectively serve as a Dark Guardian, protector of our kind. Please step forward.”

I did as instructed, three long steps that seemed to take forever to make.

He pushed the leather and gilded book toward me. “Do you swear on the ancient text to answer all questions truthfully?”

I placed my palm on the book. I’d touched it before but never had it felt so intimidating. “I do.”

“Step back.”

Again, I followed his orders. I knew now was not the time to be belligerent, even though I thought they were being a little too dramatic. It seemed to me this could be handled fairly quickly.

Are you a Shifter?

No.

You’re outta here.

But the elders apparently thought things needed to be dragged out.

“Was the last full moon designated as your shifting moon?” Elder Wilde asked.

“It was.”

“Did you face it alone?”

“I did.”

“Did you shift?”

I darted a glance at Connor. He gave me a barely perceptible nod. It was enough to strengthen my resolve not to cower from the truth. “No.”

“Did you tell Shifters that you did?”

I furrowed my brow. “I don’t think I ever actually said I did, but I might have insinuated that I did.”

“Are you a Shifter, Guardian Reed?”

Out of love and respect for my mother, and the choice she’d made, I lifted my chin as haughtily as I could. “No, I’m human.”

Kudos for me. My voice didn’t shake.

“Are you aware that only Shifters may serve as Dark Guardians?”

“Yes.”

“You didn’t think you needed to inform the elders of this…shortcoming?”

“I was ashamed.”

“Did you enter the treasures room without permission
to look through the sacred ancient text?”

“Yes.”

“Were you captured by Bio-Chrome?”

I’d so hoped that they wouldn’t go there. My gaze jumped to the flat screen, before settling back on Elder Wilde. “Yes.”

He gave a nod. Elder Mitchell twisted around in his seat and pointed a remote at the TV. It came on and in the next instant, Connor and I were back in the cage right after the cougar attack. I was holding him in my lap, yelling at Mason.

My first thought was that I looked terrible! My hair was a tangled mess, my eyes had a wildness in them, my face was smudged with dirt. How could Connor have stood holding me?

It was painful to hear me bargaining with Mason, even more painful to see Connor lying there so still and pale.

The scene abruptly cut to the white and black room. I was freshly showered. I looked like a traitor.

Standing in the council room now, I fought not to squirm as I watched Mason peppering me with questions that I answered in a flat, emotionless voice. My eyes even looked dead. Having to endure all this again was cruel and unusual punishment. Where was Amnesty International when I needed them?

The video rolled along until it reached the worst part of my ordeal.

“Come on, Mason. Let me go back. I told you everything I know.”

“Everything?”

“Everything.”

“Then what do you have to bargain with?”

I’d looked panicked when I thought I’d appeared so cool and in control. I could see my mind searching for something, anything. I knew by the slump of my shoulders when I found it. Then I straightened on that stupid white sofa.

“At some point, you’re going to need to test your serum or whatever it is on a human.”

He grinned. “Are you volunteering?”

I swallowed. “Yeah.”

“Let me make sure I have this right—if I take you back to the cage, when the serum is perfected, you’ll willingly let me inject you with it?”

“Yeah, as long as you don’t talk, because I’m really getting tired of hearing you talk.”

“I’ll want a full report of everything you experienced, everything you felt.”

“You’ll get it.”

Watching the victorious grin of satisfaction that crossed Mason’s face, I saw again on the screen what I’d
recognized in that stupid room—I’d given Mason exactly what he’d wanted all along. A human guinea pig.

Thank goodness the TV suddenly went black. The torture was over. Everyone knew that my lying about being a Shifter was the least of my transgressions. I couldn’t look at Connor. I just couldn’t. I’d never wanted him to know exactly what had happened when I wasn’t with him. I’d betrayed everything he and the Dark Guardians were fighting for. To protect their kind.

“Do you have anything to say in your defense for your flagrant disregard of our traditions and rules and your willingness to consort with the enemy?” Elder Wilde asked.

Consort? Who used words like that anymore? I opened my mouth—

“If it pleases the elders, I have something to say,” Connor announced.

As one, the three elders turned their heads toward him. “It does please the elders, Guardian McCandless.”

Connor stood, his gaze homing in on the elders like that of a predator who intended to intimidate its prey into surrendering. “I’ve known Brittany a long time.” He shook his head. “No, I haven’t
known
her. I’ve
seen
her. Working out, running. Taking campers into the wilderness. Not until we were captured by Bio-Chrome did I really get to
know
her. You’ve only watched a minuscule
fraction of our time with Bio-Chrome. For days we were prisoners, left alone with no idea of what was going on. She never grew discouraged, she never complained. Sometimes she even made me laugh.

“She’s courageous. They released a cougar on us to force us to shift. She couldn’t. I did. But she didn’t cower in the corner. She used her strength and a hell of kick to distract it so I could get the advantage.

“She’s resourceful. When Mason attacked us in the forest, I shifted, but again, she couldn’t. I had him pinned, but I couldn’t finish him off. She kicked me—
kicked
me—off of him so she could get to him and impale him with a weapon she’d made.

“She’s loyal. When they took her away and refused to bring her back, she made a deal with the devil to return to me, to our prison, so I wouldn’t be alone. You just saw her interrogation. She didn’t tell Mason anything that would have helped him, anything that was a true betrayal to us.

“Yes, we have the ability to shift into wolf form, but we are not wolves. It is our intelligence, our courage, and our willingness to put others first that separates us from the animals. No one is more dedicated to protecting the Shifters than Brittany. Whether or not she is a Dark Guardian, she is my mate. I declare her as such.”

I heard a couple of gasps. The loudest of all was mine.
“Connor, no! You don’t know what they’ll decide. They could banish me, they could—”

His gorgeous blue eyes came to bear on me. “I don’t care what they decide, Brittany. You told me that there was nothing you wanted more than to be a Dark Guardian. There’s nothing I want more than I want you.”

I felt the tears burning my eyes.

I will not cry. I will not cry.

“Connor, I lied. There is something I want more than to be a Dark Guardian. You.”

He grinned with satisfaction. “I was hoping you’d feel that way. You’re my mate—if you so choose.”

For the flicker of a heartbeat it looked as though he doubted what my answer would be. I’d never wanted anything more. “I choose you.”

His eyes held so much love, warmth, and pleasure that nothing else that was facing me this morning seemed important. They could kick me out, banish me, send me to the moon, and I’d be happy.

“Have you anything else to add, Guardian McCandless?” Elder Wilde asked.

“No, sir.”

The elder nodded and Connor sat.

“Have you anything to say in your own defense, Guardian Reed?” Elder Wilde asked.

“I never meant to put anyone in danger. I truly thought
I could perform my duties even though I couldn’t shift. But I also knew if I told the truth about my situation, that I wouldn’t be accepted. I’ve only ever known life among the Shifters, so maybe I’m not quite as brave as Connor thinks. I didn’t want to be kicked out. But I will accept the decision of the tribunal.”

I released a deep breath. In the back of my mind, I thought I’d said too little, that there was more I should have said.

Elder Wilde held my gaze. “The question before the tribunal is whether or not, in light of your actions, you may serve as a Dark Guardian. Before we go any further, I have something to add. The answer you were seeking in the ancient text. I may have found it.”

I couldn’t have been more stunned if he’d suddenly announced he wasn’t a Shifter either. “You didn’t even know the question.”

He gave me an indulgent smile. “I am the senior elder for a reason.”

I wasn’t even sure I knew the question anymore. So much had happened, and now I knew I’d never be able to shift, so he certainly hadn’t found the secret to that dilemma. “All right. What’s the answer?”

“First, answer me this: Are you ready to face your judgment?”

Swallowing hard, I nodded. “Yes, sir.”

He folded his hands on the old leather book as though he had the ability to access its contents through osmosis. “The ancient text refers to a woman with the heart of a wolf, but the inability to shift. It says through her the humans and Shifters will unite. Perhaps you will become that woman, Brittany Reed, perhaps not. But the Council of Elders cannot deny you have the heart of a wolf. It is up to the Dark Guardians to determine whether or not you are worthy to stand beside them. As you are his declared mate, Guardian McCandless may not vote.”

I saw Connor’s jaw clench. But since that was the only reaction he exhibited, I decided he’d known what his declaration would cost him.

“We will take the vote,” Elder Wilde said.

Lucas stood. “Worthy.”

Kayla. “Worthy.”

Rafe. “Worthy.”

Lindsey. “Worthy.”

Those four I’d expected.

Daniel stood. “Worthy.”

I was halfway there.

Five more guardians stood. “Worthy.”

I knew Dark Guardians didn’t cry, but all the blinking in the world didn’t stop a solitary tear from rolling down my cheek. I let it go, didn’t try to swipe it away, because I didn’t want to bring attention to it.

“The decision has been made. Brittany Reed, you will remain a Dark Guardian.”