Dark Promises (Dark #29) (5 page)

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Authors: Christine Feehan

BOOK: Dark Promises (Dark #29)
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“Think about it, Gabrielle. I'll do some research and see what we're looking at. We'll talk in a few days.”

She shook her head, clinging to him. “If I let you go now, I'll lose you. Make love to me. Give me that.”

Sheer torture. He felt as if his heart was being ripped out of his body. “Honey, if I touch you, I will never have the strength to walk away. I think you know that. We have to know what we're getting into before we make a decision.”

She tore herself out of his arms. “You've already made up your mind. God. I hate them. I hate what I am. I hate that I have to live my life according to their rules. That some man I don't know or love can dictate to me what I can or can't have. I don't know if he even exists and he's ruling my life.”

She turned and ran away from him, charging through the field of Night Star flowers. The stalks bent toward her, as if bowing as she passed, and then sprang back up. Gary watched her flee, hearing her weep as she raced down the mountain, her gown flowing behind her. He wept with her, his tears bloodred, dropping on the petals of the flowers surrounding him. Even as he looked at the droplets, the red faded to a dull gray.

Gary blinked rapidly to clear his vision. With Gabrielle's departure, all color was gone from his life. She'd taken it with her. He stood there a long time. Minutes. Hours. He didn't know. Staying still. Knowing if he moved, he might shatter. She took her bright light and left him in darkness.

“Gary.”

He closed his eyes. The voice held too much compassion. Mikhail Dubrinsky, prince of the Carpathian people, stood to one side of him. Gregori was on the other. Guarding. Watching over him. To protect the others, or defend him? He didn't know, but Gabrielle must have returned while he stood alone and they had come to him.

“You knew.” It was an accusation.

“I suspected,” Mikhail corrected. “I hoped, for your sake. I feel the love you have for her. It is very strong. I wanted it to work out, but the chances were . . .”

“Zero,” Gary said, tasting bitterness. “She couldn't have held the other half of my soul, nor could I hold hers. I had hoped she wasn't another man's lifemate. That she was psychic, but that she wasn't a lifemate. Not all psychic women are. When she was converted, I held on to that. I didn't make a move, waiting for another to claim her. They didn't. She was mine. She belonged to me.”

“Gary,” Gregori said, his voice gentle. “I'm sorry.”

“I gutted her. She's so hurt.”

“She'll come to terms with it,” Mikhail said.

For the first time Gary looked at the prince, met his eyes. He knew there was fury in his gaze, but Mikhail didn't flinch. “She was
gutted
. I did that
to her. You both knew I would lose my ability to see in color immediately. You should have warned me.”

He was looking directly at Mikhail so he saw the shock on the prince's face. Mikhail looked to Gregori. Gary followed his gaze. Gregori looked just as shocked.

“You've lost color?” Gregori asked.

Gary nodded. The sense of betrayal faded with the shock on their faces. “Yes. Tonight. Nearly all at once. When she left, she took the last of the color with her.”

“That isn't good,” Gregori said. “If it happened to you, it will happen to the others as well. Not Zev. He has his lifemate. But Luiz. And he's a De La Cruz. That's going to be brutal.”

“How long before I lose my emotions?” Gary asked.

Gregori's gaze sharpened. “Do not even think about living with Gabrielle, Gary. Do you have any idea how dangerous that would be?”

“That's for us to decide. I want to know how long I've got.”

“Gary,” Mikhail said, turning Gary's attention back to him. “We had no idea you would lose your ability to see in color, at least not for a couple of hundred years. We should have known better. You have the blood, the memories and experience of the ancients. Of course you would also have the loss of emotion and color as so many of them had no lifemate and neither do you.”

Gregori swore in the ancient language. “Gary. When you lose emotion too fast, it is dangerous. Horrendous. You cannot be with Gabrielle when that happens. You will need help through those first dark months.”

Gary cursed his own intellect. He had known. He didn't want to know, but he had. He had lost Gabrielle. “I can't face her. If I see her cry one more time, or if she pleads with me, I won't be able to resist the love I have for her.”

Mikhail let out his breath slowly. “Andre has found his lifemate. She believes she has the ability to extend the ancients' time before they become so dangerous they cannot hunt the undead or feed from innocents. Gregori was going to go to the monastery up in the mountains to talk to Fane, who seems to run the place. We were hoping that if Andre's lifemate could really do such a thing, the other healers could be taught as well. Perhaps you should go in Gregori's place.”

Gregori stirred as if to protest, but Mikhail's gaze lifted to his just once and Gregori subsided.

It is possible she can aid him as well.

Gregori took a deep breath, glided a step closer to Gary as if he would shield him from what was coming in the future.

Gary glanced at Gregori, held his eyes for a long moment and then nodded. It would give him time and distance, something he needed to separate himself from Gabrielle. He would either find a solution in that time, or he would learn to accept that he had lost her forever.

3

G
abrielle streaked through the dark sky. She was going to be too late. She felt it. That terrible buildup of tension. Of dread. It was there, a tremendous pressure in her chest. Her belly was in knots. Her heart hurt. An actual pain. No one would tell her where Mikhail had sent Gary, but he'd definitely been sent away. He was gone the following rising when she went looking for him. She'd done what she'd never attempted to do before. She'd used her deep connection with him to call to him—and then she had tried shapeshifting on her own. Flying on her own.

The echo of his answer was faint—very faint. She knew he was a very long distance away from her, but it didn't matter, she could follow his psychic trail. She'd had time to really think about what her life would be like without him, and she knew she didn't want to live in the Carpathian Mountains. She would go away, far from everything and everyone she knew. Disassociate. That was what she did. She lost herself in her research so she didn't have to face life. A lonely life. Gary was the only one who “saw” her. She needed him to be real. To exist.

She didn't even care if she was chasing after him, needy as hell. Psycho ex-girlfriend. Because she knew without a shadow of a doubt that he loved her. He would walk through fire for her. If she didn't get him away
from the prince and Gregori, she would lose him forever and she would lose herself.

Below her the mountains streaked by. She caught glimpses of the dense forest and craggy mountaintops. Ahead were the mists surrounding the monastery where the ancients went when they wouldn't walk into the sun but could no longer be trusted around humans or Carpathians. When they could no longer safely hunt the undead. They were dangerous men.

Gabrielle didn't want to go anywhere near the monastery. She didn't want anything at all to do with them, but if that was Gary's destination, then she was going to be there first. She knew, from sliding into her sister's mind, that he had gone to see Andre and his new lifemate, Teagan. Together, the three would approach those in the monastery to see if they would be willing to have Teagan try to help them. Gabrielle intended to catch them outside the gates. She had followed Gary's psychic trail and found her way.

The air had gone cold, unnaturally so. She could feel the safeguards woven into the mists broadcasting a warning that got under her skin even when she knew why and how it was there. Inside the mist things moved. Shapes. Voices whispered warnings. The mist swirled, dense and heavy, so that even in the form she'd taken, she was saturated, the water penetrating her feathers, a nearly impossible feat.

She could easily see how the ancients had stayed undiscovered for so many years. Their warning system was brilliant and cleverly in play all year round as well as both day and night. The actual location of the monastery appeared to change as well. She'd catch a glimpse of it, the mist would close over it and when the veil parted again over what she could swear was the exact same spot, the buildings were gone.

She was fully Carpathian with all the powers. She had never really utilized her gifts before. No one had really talked to her about what she could and couldn't do, and she hadn't asked. She should have asked. She knew most humans were converted by a lifemate and their lifemate taught them everything they needed to know. She'd been converted and, although grateful to be alive, she had disappeared into her work so she wouldn't have to face a life that was very alien to her.

Perhaps if someone had worked with her, she wouldn't have felt so cut off, but no one thought to do so, and she couldn't ask. Not the prince.
Certainly not Gregori. She had counted on Gary. She had always counted on Gary. He would teach her what she needed to know.

Now, she used her mind to keep herself in the air. She knew everything started in one's mind. Her feathers might be soaked, but she could shift in the air if she had to. Whatever the ancients tried, she would not be afraid. She would not back down. Gary belonged with her. No one was going to take him away from her. She'd seen in his eyes that he was close to capitulating.

The owl began to falter in the center of the mist and she forced a shift, one she'd never attempted before, but she was very familiar with molecules and the molecular structure of the human body, so she wasn't as afraid of becoming molecules as she had been when she'd first learned how to shift into the form of an animal or bird.

The veil of mist parted again, and way down the mountain she caught a glimpse of four men and a woman hiking the mountain trail above the human village. They looked tiny, like ants. She was grateful they couldn't possibly see her in the thick, swirling clouds of living fog miles and miles above them.

Without warning a wrenching sickness took her over, so that even in her present state, without a body, she felt as if she might tumble from the sky and be sick over and over. Fear seized her. She couldn't tell why. It was unreasonable. She knew that, but it didn't help to lessen the effect on her. Fortunately, the veil parted again, and this time, she actually saw the gates of the monastery. More. She saw Gary. He was with Andre. She recognized the Carpathian others referred to as “the Ghost.” With him was a woman. She was shorter than Gabrielle and had beautiful, mocha skin. Her hair was a deep ebony, and even braided it was very thick and hung to her waist.

Relief flooded through her and she dropped down fast, afraid if she didn't get through the small hole in the mist, she would lose the location again. She saw Gary turn his head toward her, as she came out of the mist to shift only feet from him. Andre stepped in front of his lifemate.

“Gabrielle.” Gary breathed her name.

The unguarded look on his face was everything she could ask for right before a mask dropped down.

“Gary. I've had enough time to think about everything, and I'm willing
to take the chance. We have too much for me to be afraid of reaching for what I want,” Gabrielle said hastily, moving right into him.

She ignored Andre and his lifemate, Teagan. She ignored the fact that she was nearly pressed against the huge, thick gates of the monastery. She knew better than to touch them, but she stayed firmly inserted between Gary and the gates. She knew she only had a few minutes before everything was lost. She knew because she felt the two Carpathians trailing after her. If they arrived before she managed to convince Gary they deserved their time together, she would lose everything.

“Gabrielle.” Gary said her name softly. Just that—her name.

She closed her eyes at the love in his voice. So real. So raw. So honest. How could anyone ask them to give up each other? As humans they would have married, had children and lived a happily-ever-after life. She knew that with every breath she took. She could hear the same knowledge in the sound of Gary's voice. In her name.

She held out her hand. “Come away with me. Right now. Andre can do the prince's bidding. We can take fifty years. Fifty. That's all we're asking for ourselves. We have an endless amount of time ahead of us.” She couldn't think about that long eternity of loneliness stretching in front of her—not without Gary. “Fifty years isn't too much to ask, Gary.”

She held her breath. Looked into his eyes. Let him see how much he meant to her. How much she loved him. They deserved to be together. They belonged. She felt it in her heart. No, in her very soul, the soul she supposedly shared with another man.

“Gabrielle.” The melting sensation in his heart told Gary he was so far gone in this woman he was going to lose the battle. He didn't want to ever hurt her. Not again. The look on her face before she ran down the mountain, the rejection and pain so plain in her eyes had gutted him right along with her.

“We've given to them. We both have.” She stepped closer.

Her scent was elusive, mesmerizing, beautiful and delicate like she was, wrapping him up and surrounding him with
her
. Gary always got lost in her when she was so close. He couldn't help it, he had to touch her. All that soft skin. It felt as soft as it looked. He framed her face with both hands, ignoring Andre, who had stepped close, his lifemate, Teagan, who had tears in her eyes, one step behind her man.

Gary stared into Gabrielle's dove gray eyes and fell hard. He always did. She was right. They both had given much to the Carpathian people. Both had suffered. Nearly died. “Fifty years,” he whispered.

Her eyes searched his, hope creeping into her expression. “We'll come back after and give the rest of our lives to them. If we find lifemates at that time, fine, if we don't, we had our time.”

“Honey,” he said, still trying to do the right thing. “I could lose my emotions. Any time. Any day. What then?”

“You'll know before it happens. They fade away. Over time. We have time. That's one thing we do have.”

“My ability to see in color left when you did on our wedding night.” He would always remember the sight of her running from him, taking the vivid colors with her, leaving his world gray. “My emotions could go the same way.”

“I get that you're saying there's a risk. I know you would never hurt me, Gary. I
know
it. If you lose your emotions, we'll deal with that. But it should be
my
risk.
My
choice. I should have that right. I work with hot viruses; do you think I wouldn't risk everything for you? I'm fighting for us, Gary. I need to know I'm just as important to you as you are to me. I need you to fight for me.”

She laid it all out. Courageous. Right in front of Andre and Teagan. She bared her soul, leaving herself exposed and vulnerable to him. There was no resisting that. He felt the smile start somewhere deep inside of him. She was right. She was
so
right. Fifty years in a Carpathian's life was nothing. For them, it would be everything they wanted.

“I love you, Gabrielle,” he stated. “I love you with every breath in my body. And honey, never, for one moment, think you aren't worth fighting for. I'd die for you. You aren't second to anyone. You're my number-one priority.”

Her face lit up. Like sunshine. Like the stars over his head. Lighting his world. He might not be able to see in color, but he could see the light shining like a beacon—for him. His heart jerked in his chest.

“I think Andre and Teagan can handle this assignment without me. I was here to observe, if the ancients even wanted to try Teagan's experiment. We can leave now. Go to the States, live out our time there.”

Gabrielle flung herself at him with a glad cry, her mouth turned up to his. He caught her in midair, wrapping his arms around her at the same time
she wrapped her legs around him. His mouth found hers, tasting her. Tasting the wild in her. The wild she never let anyone see, but he always knew it was there, under the surface. His. She'd been his from the moment he laid eyes on her.

He kissed her. Hard. Wet. A kiss that promised there was a lot more to come. Her mouth was a kind of paradise, her taste addicting. Sweet. Pure honey. Her body jerked hard, nearly pulling her from his arms. He lifted his head. Saw her eyes wide with shock and fear.

“Gary,” she whispered. Scared. Terrified.

Her body jerked again. Hard. Hard enough to tear her from his arms. She screamed as she flew backward, slamming into the thick wooden gates of the monastery. Vines, like snakes, circled her wrists and drew her hands above her head. More vines wrapped around her waist, pinning her to the massive wall, holding her there, a prisoner.

She screamed again, her eyes on him. “Help! What's happening? What's wrong? Help me!”

A voice woke him. A soft musical murmur. Sound. Melodic. The notes pushed through the darkness of his mind. Silvery notes that left a small trail in their wake. He could almost see them, tiny, narrow streams of liquid silver penetrating the dense sheet of unrelenting darkness. The streaks left trails through his mind, much like a comet. The light spread. Sank deep.

Aleksei waved his hand to remove the soil surrounding him. The musical notes went from silver to gold.
Gold.
Not gray. Not a dull, dingy white.
Gold.
Silver and gold. He could see the notes dancing through the sheet of darkness, bursting like stars, ripping the sheet to shreds. Each note tore more of the dark from his mind, letting in the light until the backs of his eyes burned.

He blinked rapidly and looked around slowly, his eyes hooded, lashes fanning down to protect his vision. The carefully cultivated plants were in bloom and he could see the riot of colors. So bright. So vibrant. His eyes burned and the intensity of the colors caused a lurch in his belly. Disorienting. Still.
Colors.

He took a deep breath and drew in the air she breathed. His lifemate.
She was close. Right outside the gates. He heard her, that soft murmur. Plea. She was arguing with someone. He drew her into his lungs. Deep. Deeper. Holding her right there with the miracle of silver and gold notes burning through his shredded soul. Cauterizing. Attempting to repair the damage done by centuries of killing. Of being alone, hoping and then losing hope. The darkness didn't win and yet it had—until now.

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