Dawn Endeavor 4: Gunnar's Game (13 page)

Lonnie tried to shrug off his concern. If Sharpe had detected him or his tie to Melissa, she would have confronted him about it. It's not as if he hid from her, not with his office a stone's throw from Berstrom's.

Berstrom suddenly stood with a sick smile. “Admiral. So good to see you here.

Robert and I were just finishing up.”

“I just wanted to make sure our budget for the next fiscal year is in order. No worries, right, Berstrom?”

All three men nodded at one another, the semblance of friendly camaraderie one that they all knew to be false.

“Things are fine, Admiral,” Berstrom answered in a chipper voice. “Just fine.”
And it would be. Just as soon as Alicia and her Circs were no more. Time to
scrap the Dawn Endeavor project, finally, and move on to bigger and brighter things.

Gunnar sat in the cabin where he could think, away from everyone and everything. He couldn't help it. He knew Jules and the others needed him. Admiral London was due to visit in another fourteen hours, and they needed to prepare. But fourteen hours was half a day away. He had some time to kill.

Time to kill, not
people
to kill.

Regret for the way he'd ended things with Ava hit him hard. His berserker and beast refused to rise, weighted down under lashing sorrow. For all that he'd claimed he'd killed his girlfriend and sister, he could too easily see their happy faces glowing just for him.

Gentle Sophie, his younger sister. He remembered white-blonde hair and blue eyes. A soft smile, that special pleasure she reserved just for him. The poor kid hadn't had much to smile about growing up dirt poor under the stern eye of an autocratic dickhead. And what about Susanna? For all that he thought he'd loved her, would never live without her, he'd survived long enough to join the navy, become a SEAL, a Circ, and fuck anything that moved.

At first the sexual needs had felt like a betrayal. But since screwing other women had hurt him as much as it soothed his physical needs, he'd reveled in the emotional pain, because he deserved it. If he'd been less selfish, less concerned with his fucked-up need for affection and belonging, he never would have invited Susanna into his life, and she'd still be alive today.

Sophie he should have protected, and he knew that. She'd always been in danger, but Susanna had been a true casualty of bad timing and the bad taste to see something good in him.

A replica of his father, Gunnar had the same height, the same brawn, the same cold, ice blue eyes, or so his mother had repeatedly told him before she'd died.

The bitter woman had blamed him for so much. Too weak to leave his father, she'd put the fault for Eric Tersch's abuse at Gunnar's hands.

You’re too loud, too quiet. Too neat, too sloppy. Hurry up. Slow down
. No matter what he did, he was fucked. She doted on Sophie, though. His father did too, until he drank or forgot how much loved her. Sophie was the little ray of sunshine in a house from hell.

Was it any wonder he'd killed his father? Tersch had been born and trained to destroy—by example.

Eric Tersch loved order, and he loved control. The raging beast was never far from his father's mind.
No, not a beast. A berserker. The fucker didn’t deserve a
beast. He’d have killed it for being a pure-hearted thing
. Though Tersch's beast liked his anger, he knew better than to harm because of it. His beast protected the innocent. Always. It was the berserker that went off half-cocked.

His beast puffed up with pleasure at the distinction before urging Tersch to return to the mansion to find Ava.
Claim her. Need her. Love her.

Tersch rubbed his eyes, so tired of fighting himself all the time. “Christ. I do love her. That's why I'm protecting her from it, you bastard.”
And now I’m crazy for
talking to my schizoid beastly personality. Fuck.

He'd known from the moment he met Ava that one of them would eventually have to leave Circ central. He wanted her, but he couldn't have her. And now seeing she was Circ, he really had to go. After he dealt with the dickheads trying to kill the team, he'd look for another place to live. It would kill him to leave his friends, to leave Ava, but he had no choice. He'd learned his lesson the hard way.

Best to sacrifice his happiness than kill an innocent woman, the way his father's berserker had killed the women in Tersch's life.

He groaned and lay back on the blankets covering a section of the dirt floor.

Since he'd discovered the place months ago, he'd taken pains to make it more livable. Hayashi had helped, and Tersch now had a place to sleep, a stash of Tastykakes in a cooler to repel wildlife, and several bottles of water he filled from a nearby natural spring. Solitude and silence, just what he needed.

“I know you're in there.”

He jumped to his feet in shock when Ava pushed through the open doorway, bathed in moonlight. “What the hell?”

“Didn't hear me or smell me, I know. What can I say? I'm good.” She grinned, and the sight of her smug smile pained him enough to bring tears to his eyes.

Don’t be a pussy, Son. Man up
. He heard his father's scornful words and felt the open-handed slaps to his face as if he'd been struck yesterday. So much for years of distance and repressed memories to salve the pain.

He turned before she spied his weakness, embarrassed anew. So much for control. The damned woman unraveled him like a fucking black widow.

“Gunnar?”

Shit. Not the soft, concerned voice. “I need space, Ava.”

“I know. That's why I'm here.”

Did she not hear him? “I said—”

“I know what you said. But you're an idiot. You don't know what you need.”

“Didn't you listen before?” Anger returned, and as much as he welcomed the strength of the emotion, he feared it as well. He couldn't get too carried away, or the berserker would return to hurt Ava.

“I said shut that bitch up!” Eric yelled. He struck Sophie so hard, she hit the
table and sliced open her forehead. “I want space, quiet. I can’t think with all that
racket.”

Momma stared at him in silence, a broken woman. And then Susanna made a
noise, and his father pushed open the door to his bedroom, where Gunnar had been
hiding her. She’d showed up at the house unexpectedly. He’d warned her never to
come around. Especially not with Eric home, drinking, mad…

“I won't go away. Not again.” Ava's beast stared at him through dark black eyes. “I've come to claim my mate.”

He snorted, trying to pretend he wasn't shaking. “Bullshit. You're just pissed because I don't want you.”

She had the nerve to laugh, then hit him so fast and with such force, he saw stars. Before he could recover, she moved in a blur and stuck him with a specially tipped needle to penetrate his thick skin. Even in human form, Circ skin was tough.

She depressed the plunger and injected him with something. Tersch wanted to be mad, but both his beast and his berserker approved the trickery.
Good mate.

Smart.

“It'll just relax you a bit. Enough to hide your rage under a calming haze, but not too much.” She smiled at him.

God, she was so pretty. Crazy but gorgeous.

“Now you just lay there while I strip those clothes off you.” Alarmed at the idea, he protested, gratified he had enough cognizance to know she shouldn't get him naked. “No. The shit you gave me isn't working fast enough. If I can still think, I can still get mad. Leave me, Ava. I don't want to hurt you.”

“You won't. You love me,” she said defiantly, as if daring him to contradict her.

“And you love me. So how stupid does that make you?” he growled. “Now let me… When—What the fuck did you put on my wrists?” Shocked, he tugged but couldn't free himself from the dark cord wrapped around his wrists and fastened to stakes on the ground on either side of his head.

“I told you I'm fast, sweetie.” Ava hummed under her breath as she used her claws to strip him of the trousers he wore. He'd left the house the day before while
changed
and didn't wear anything else.

“Man, have I told you how much I love that you go commando? That is one beautiful cock.”

His dick stiffened, pointing directly up at her. To his mortification, he felt his cheeks heat. “Ava, come on.” He squirmed and sucked in a breath when she closed her small hand around him.

“You're so thick, I can't wrap my hand around you. You're always big, aren't you? Even when you're not
changed
.” She licked her lips, and he groaned. “Now, this is how it's gonna be. I'm going to ride you until you're begging me to come. Then I'm going to make you bleed and do it all over again.” She lifted a hand and flashed her pretty claws at him.

The meanness in her tone turned him on so much, his dick grew wet. Not just from the oils he naturally secreted when
changed
, but from a burst of precum that dampened his slit.

“You can't. The beast might play nice, but my berserker's going to hurt you, Ava. Why the hell do you think I've never claimed you before?”

“Maybe because you're scared?” she taunted. “Not used to fucking a woman who can put you on your ass.” She ran a claw down his belly, and he shuddered.

“Hard to pound into a woman you're afraid of crushing under all that might, hmm?”

“Dammit,” he rasped, completely under her spell. He could barely concentrate on anything but the feel of her sharp nails over his skin. She didn't play nice at all.

She dug hard enough for him to feel it, but not hard enough to break the skin.

“I can do this all night.” Ava chuckled. “But I don't think you'll last that long.”

“I can last forever if I have to.” An empty threat, and they both knew it. His cock felt so hard right now, he feared he'd come without much more provocation.

She wiped her fingers over his slit and rubbed it over his cockhead.

He bucked in her hand.

“I already know how good you taste.” She licked her lips. “Do you remember how good my mouth feels?”

“Shit.” He panted, trying to bring himself back under control. He'd never been this turned on, and he kept worrying that his beast would push past the drug she'd given him. Once his beast took control, his berserker wouldn't be far behind.

“No, no. That's not right. I want your honest response, Gunnar.” Ava remained clothed, and the sight of her fully dressed while he was naked lent her an impression of power.
Impression? Hell, the woman has me tied down like a fucking
sacrifice.

“I'm not going to tell you again. Let me g—Ava!” She swallowed his cock in one large breath, taking all of him to the back of her throat. She didn't move or suck him, just held him there, helpless, aching, and needing to come so badly.

“Baby, oh yeah. Fuck me,” he pleaded.

She slowly withdrew until the tip of him rested against her plump lips.

He couldn't stop staring at the erotic sight, drugged on her skillful play.

“Where do you want it, sweetie? In my mouth or in my cunt?” Hearing her talk like that, watching her lick and nibble at his cock, turned him inside out. He felt his berserker rage to break free, and then Ava slapped his chest hard and raked her nails down his abdomen, drawing blood.

“
You
, wait for it,” she snarled, and he had the oddest notion she spoke not to him, but to his berserker.

Staring up into pitch-black eyes bemused him enough that he ceased movement. His berserker stared into the Circ he wanted with his last breath. To his astonishment, he felt something inside him give. He couldn't understand how this slight female could break him down so completely. But he couldn't deny his berserker's subtle approval. A distant surrender.

As if sensing it, Ava became pure woman once more, her now hazel eyes slumberous as she glanced down at his cock and stroked him.

“Ava, come on, baby.”

She raised a brow. “What's that? I don't think I heard a please.”

“Goddammit. I'm going to come.”

“So come.” She ran a sharp nail under his glans.

He shuddered as a spurt of cum shot from his tip. “
Fuck
. Ava, honey, I want to come inside you, deep in your pussy. I want all of you.
Please
.” He shivered, aware he'd yielded to the petite female, a thing he'd never done to any woman. Tersch knew the time had come to acknowledge her place in his life. He could only hope she wouldn't come to hate him for it.

Love blazed from her eyes, from her smile. She tore his heart from him with a look. “Now why didn't you say so in the first place?” The little witch stood and slowly stripped down, giving him a tantalizing view of her slender belly, full breasts, and long, toned legs. For a short woman, Ava had been given the requisite curves and swells of a goddess. And that ass…

He couldn't help promising, “I'm gonna fuck that ass.”

“Frisky, hmm? Oh, and ready to come, I see.”

He wanted to warn her to move slowly. He was right on the edge, aroused from being at her mercy—under the care of a strong, deserving mate. Before he could say anything, she straddled his body, giving him a view of her delectable pussy.

“Get down here,” he ordered. “Let me eat you.”

She took her sweet time kneeling, but then her folds descended to his lips, and he lost himself in the taste of her.

Sultry, womanly, powerful. Her essence reminded him why he loved her so much. And her clit, the plump bud was ripe. He was hard, and she was harder.

Tersch nipped her flesh and shoved his tongue inside her, wishing it was his cock.

He arched his hips up in the air with every stab of his tongue. Her scent changed, a sweet wildness indicating her near climax. But before he could finish her, she pulled away.

“Not yet, baby. Let me get you there.”

“No. This way's better.” The woman moved in a blur of speed as she straddled his groin and slammed hard over his cock, sheathing him deeply inside her.

The impact shot him into instant orgasm, and he roared.

She screamed his name as she clenched him tight, coming hard while he unloaded a mess of cum. The sheer agony of pleasure had him convulsing a second time, needing to tie himself to the woman.