Day by Day (32 page)

“I think retirement is at least twelve or fifteen years away, not two like we’d hoped. By then, these maps and brochures will all be badly outdated.”

“What about this summer when the girls are out of school? They’ll probably want to spend some time with the Carrs at the farm, but why couldn’t we take them on a short trip to see if they like sailing as much as we do? We could take a trip with them every summer. I know it’s not exactly what we planned to do originally, but it might be even better. The girls are young enough that we could actually go on that two-year, sail-around-the-world trip we wanted and take them with us. I could homeschool them. Just imagine what it would be like. They’d have the world as their classroom. History would come alive. They’d learn so
much more from experience, rather than reading a dull textbook.”

Laughing, he pulled her into his arms. “Slow down! You’re on fast-forward,” he teased. “Let’s take it one step at a time. There’s a boat show in Philadelphia next weekend. Why don’t we take Jessie and Melanie over to look at the sailboats?”

She smiled and patted his back, quite certain that they had both taken the most important step of all—the step toward reclaiming and living the faith that would sustain them for the rest of their days.

B
y custom, families across the nation celebrate Mother’s Day on the second Sunday in May. Also by custom, the Welleswood PTA hosts a Mother’s Day Breakfast that day. This year, however, the event that honored the women who loved and nurtured the children in the community went far beyond previous efforts.

Families and friends, neighbors and residents, as well as a choir of schoolchildren, welcomed women of all ages to the cafeteria at the high school for the first time to accommodate the largest number of attendees since the event began more than fifteen years earlier. Some women were mothers of biological or adopted children. Others were foster mothers, grandmothers, aunts, or cousins. Long-term caregivers or occasional babysitters were not overlooked. All but one senior woman from the Towers attended. Since she was in the hospital recuperating from surgery, she received a bouquet of flowers and a gift cer
tificate good for a free breakfast at The Diner whenever she was well enough to return home.

Beneath a rainbow canopy of paper flowers made by all the elementary school children in the district, everyone enjoyed a good meal together after Reverend Fisher said grace, and listened to a wonderfully funny speech given by the pastor’s wife, Eleanor. Exhilarated by their success, exhausted by their hours and hours of work, but extremely pleased by the whole affair, Barbara, Judy and Ginger gave a collective groan when the PTA President called them all up to the head table. They lined up together behind Pam and stood shoulder to shoulder. She asked the audience to stand and give the three women a round of applause that, once started, did not seem to have an end.

Ginger giggled and nudged Barbara’s shoulder. “You know what this means, don’t you?”

“I imagine we get to do this again next year,” she replied and leaned toward Judy. “Didn’t I warn you about doing a good job? You two better think of something quick, or Pam is going to ask us in front of everyone so we won’t turn her down.”

Judy craned her neck to get both Barbara and Ginger in her sights. “Don’t worry. I already told her we couldn’t possibly work on the breakfast next year.”

Ginger grinned. “I knew we could count on you. Just exactly what excuse did you use?”

“And when did you tell her?” Barbara added, still skeptical.

Judy laughed. “I told her yesterday. Right after I promised to convince both of you we would help the PTA Executive Board organize some events to raise money to
expand the after-school programs in each of the elementary schools.”

Barbara gasped. “You didn’t! All of the schools?”

Ginger groaned. “What kind of events?”

“As a matter of fact, I did. Yes, all of the schools. As for the events…” Judy waved her hand in the air and jingled the keys to Pretty Ladies. “As the proud, heavily-in-debt, new owner of my very own salon, I thought we could start with a special event where the salon would donate all the proceeds on a given event day to the after-school programs. That’s just one event I have in mind, though. I’m sure the two of you will be able to come up with others. It’ll be a snap.”

Ginger’s eyes widened. “A snap?”

“A snap? For whom?” Barbara huffed.

“For three grandmothers who can outwork, outthink, and outplan all of the men and most of the women in this room. We’re all grand mothers, too. Doesn’t that say it all?” Judy teased.

Absolutely.

A
ccording to the U.S. Census 2000, grandparents who are raising grandchildren under the age of eighteen are a growing phenomenon that is reality for more than two and a quarter million grandparents in the United States. Help for those grandparents is available online at a number of sites. I highly recommend the AARP (American Association of Retired Persons) Webplace, Grandparents Information, which is especially helpful, offering advice on different challenges and links to related Web sites. If you or someone you know is raising his or her grandchild, please visit
www.aarp.org
for further information.

The Shawl Ministry is not fictional. To learn more information about this loving ministry, please visit the official Web site at
www.shawlministry.com.

For those interested in recipes, below is the recipe for the Cinnamon Bubble Wreath. Recipes for other goodies are posted on my Web page,
www.deliaparr.com.
Enjoy!

Grease 9-inch tube pan. Combine sugar and cinnamon in small bowl. Cut dough into 16 slices and roll into balls. Roll balls in sugar-cinnamon mixture and fill tube pan. Bake 20–25 minutes or until golden brown. Note: For an extra treat, top with vanilla ice cream and sprinkle with caramel and crushed pecans.

1. Friendship is a powerful theme in
   Day by Day
   . As a friend, how have you helped others deal with the difficulties in their lives? How have others helped you?
   
2. As a widow, Judy faces the challenge of raising her grandson alone. What other challenges do single women have as they grow older—challenges that married women might not face?
   
3. Both Ginger and her husband, Tyler, must adapt their lifestyle to meet the needs of their grandson. Have you ever changed your lifestyle for someone else? Why? Why not?
   
4. Barbara and her husband, John, react to the tragic loss of their son in different ways. In what way is grief personal? How can married couples share their different expressions of grief yet still remain strong as a couple?
   
5. Judy cautiously welcomes her daughter, Candy, back into her life, as well as Bran’s life. Is this consistent with the concept of forgiveness? Why or why not?
   
6. With so many grandparents raising school-age grandchildren today, how can schools help them? If there are no programs within your school district in place now, what can you do to help start one?
   
7. Judy, Barbara and Ginger organize a Mother’s Day celebration that includes all women who have nurtured a child. Is this the right way to celebrate Mother’s Day? If so, what kind of celebration would be appropriate within your community to make the holiday more inclusive?
   
8. As parents of grown children, Judy and Ginger must decide how much help is appropriate and how much help would be “enabling” their daughters. What similar struggles do you face with your own children?
   
9. After her son’s murder, Barbara relies on stereotypes when she tries to visualize the murderer. She later discovers that the two girls responsible for Steve’s death do not fit the stereotype. Have you ever been in a situation where you found yourself relying on stereotypes, only to find out you were wrong? What can you do to avoid using stereotypes?
   
10. Judy clearly sees her hairstyling work as a ministry through which she helps her clients feel better about themselves. What other occupations offer this same opportunity? Does yours?