Death Knows My Name (Memory Keepers) (2 page)

He cleared his throat. “It has your name on it because I was told to give it to you. It seems you made an impression on our rocker last night.”

“What? How the hell did I do that?”

Devon’s mouth dropped open. “Are you serious? You are drop dead gorgeous. Men look at you and see fair game. Even when you refuse to, you know,
do
yourself.”

“Why! Devon, you have to fix this.” Panic sped up my heartbeat.

“Fix what?”

I stomped my foot. “Just fix it!” He laughed, so I continued. “Devon, I am not kidding. I can’t deal with this.”

“This is life, so you have to.”

“You don’t get it.”

“Are you serious? I was there, I get it.” His voice no longer held amusement.

“Nobody gets it! My brother, my best friend, is dead. My first love is dead. Everyone I care about dies.”

“They were my best friend and my little brother, too.” His voice broke.

I sighed. He was right and I knew it. My older brother was his best friend as well, and my boyfriend was his younger brother but it always seemed it was happening to me, or rather
because
of me, that I forgot it was his loss, too.

I closed the space between us and yanked him in my arms. He hugged me back without any hesitation.

“Oh God, you aren’t going to cry, are you?” I asked. “It’s kind of early for that.”

He laughed. “What if I do? What are you going to do about it?”

I managed to shrug in his arms. “Let you and offer you my shirt as your Kleenex. God knows how many times you’ve done it for me. Just . . . just don’t kiss me this time, okay?”

“Yeah, rewriting history now are we? As I recall it, you kissed me.”

“Sure, because you were so irresistible with tears and snot running down your face, right?” I teased.

“Exactly.”

Somehow, during the day, the edges around our breakdown smoothed and I let the tension ease while I worked. After I finished my shift, I left work on time to avoid any would-be suitors and the dark.

Devon intended to drive me but got caught up in lounge business and it wasn’t late enough to be pitch black. I assured him I’d call when I was home and settled. As long as I got home before the sky had loss all traces of the sun, I would be good. Unfortunately, I didn’t realize how close to sunset it was or how quickly it darkens after.

I didn’t recognize just how bad it was until I noticed how poorly I could see, which resulted in my tripping over a raised edge of the sidewalk. Everything seemed darker than it should. The streetlights were on, but they didn’t seem to touch my side of the street. Great. This was getting old. I stopped to look around. I had always been afraid of the dark, but this was getting completely out of hand. I didn’t want to let it affect me more than it usually did, but I quickened my steps. Not that I’m frightened easy, but it felt like the shadows that clung to the buildings all around were watching me. The more I tried to ignore the feeling, the more creeped out I got. The shadows were darker than the rest of the night. Is there something darker than black? I wouldn’t think so if I weren’t seeing it with my own eyes. I decided this had to stop. Now. The only way I knew how to end it was go balls out. Where I grew up, you were either tough or knew how to come across that way. I was a little of both. I dropped my purse and took the wide stance I’d seen my brother take a hundred times. My heart raced in my chest as I drew on all the courage I had.

“Enough. If you want to kill me then just try already so I can kick your ass and get home before it gets any later.” Though, I knew I’d be the one whose ass would be getting kicked if someone were there. I wasn’t a kick-ass kind of girl unless you count being able to drink grown men under the table at sixteen years old. No? I didn’t think so.

“Let’s get this over with so I can go on with my life already.” I finished up my tough girl spiel with a practiced-to-perfection air of boredom.

My heart stopped when a man stepped from the shadows closest to me. Well, not really stepped, it was more like the shadows
became
a man. A deeply sexy one, but it was a man nonetheless. A sense of ease flowed from him. If it wasn’t for the scream I had trapped in my throat, I might have started to imagine my legs wrapped around his lean— Okay, the urge to scream or not, I did imagine our bodies tangled together. He was that sexy. He was tall, lean, and dark. His dark hair was curly and a bit long. I imagine it would be soft to the touch. He had some sort of markings dancing across his face on the left side. They went from his hair to his masculine jaw line.
Yum
was the first word that came to mind, quickly followed by
Yes, please
.

Certain parts of my body, the crazy irrational and
okay
, yes, horny ones, responded as if I knew this strange shadow man. But that was insane . . . wasn’t it?

The only move he made was the one that put him in my sight. That was it. He just stood there, unmoving.
Is he breathing?
As if he read my thoughts, he took a deep breath and I could see his chest expand under his blue T-shirt. And what a chest it was.

I started to take a step back, as my first instinct, no matter how sex-crazed I am, was to get the hell out of there, when he spoke.

“Are you going to scream?”

His voice was soft and rich. It rolled over me like butter on a hot biscuit. My nerves eased a bit more. I planned to shake my head
no
, but he continued before I could start.

“Are you going to run?”

I nodded, took a breath, and turned it into a shake of my head. Good God, I should be scared. Every time fear threatened to grip my heart, a wave of comfort hit. The shadow man studied me closely.

“Are you sure?”

I put my hands on my hips and frowned. “Oh, please. I bet you’d get a kick out of that!”

“Why would I do that?” he asked.

To his benefit, he had the decency to appear genuinely confused.

“That’s how you stalkers work, right? Frightening defenseless women gets your rocks off.”

“You are an odd person.”

I narrowed my eyes at him. “That’s exactly what every woman wants to hear from HER STALKER!”

He laughed.

Seriously, he
laughed
. I had to ignore the flutter of my heart and the dizziness in my head it caused. It felt like a night of heavy drinking rather than a night standing on the street. He examined me as if he sensed my reaction. But he didn’t mention it.

“I’m not a stalker.”

I grimaced, pretending that I hated to break it to him. “Uh, that’s what people who follow women around without her permission or knowledge are called.”

He looked almost smug. It looked good on his face. “You had knowledge of it.”

“No, I had heebee geebees. There is a difference.”

He just watched me. His eyes were nothing like I’d expect. They were the color of warm honey and just as clear. He narrowed them at me, unconsciously mirroring my earlier expression.

“That was pretty ballsy of you earlier. Kick my ass?”

I shrugged and pointed at him as my evidence. “It worked.”

“Well, what if I didn’t have an ass to kick? Do bogeymen even have asses?”

What? Woah, woah, woah. How did he know—?

“You were in my apartment? But I— Nobody was there. Unless.” I really did step back this time. “What the hell are you?”

“Mayne, please calm down.” He moved toward me but obviously thought better of it and immediately stopped.

“Like hell I’ll calm down!” There was nothing, nothing in my apartment but a shadow. A shadow in a fully lit room. I saw it but assumed I was seeing things. The shadow had entered my apartment without waking me or Big Jim, for that matter. It had been in my room and moved my food! Now, here was this guy, the shadow, only he’s not a shadow, stalking me on a dark, deserted street.

“You were in my apartment!” I finally said aloud. “While I was asleep! You were probably watching me and digging through my panty drawer and only God knows what else! Now, tell me again why I should calm down?”

“My name is Ectain Edeck, but you may call me Eric.” His voice was still very soft, but now it had a more desperate tone to it. “I am not a shadow. I am not stalking you. I am Death.”

Chapter 2

I started laughing. I did. I couldn’t help it. I stood in front of someone who called himself Death and I laughed. I guess you could say I was laughing in the face of Death. The thought made me laugh even harder. Mr. Death moved and I skittered away.

“Stay the hell away from me. I mean it!” I held my hand up. It was trembling so I yanked it back down. “Don’t come any closer, please.”

He stopped. He exhaled heavily and guilt ripped through me for causing the expression.

“Let me explain—”

“I get it.” His movement allowed me to see him better, specifically the tattoos that swirled artistically over half his face. But it didn’t matter. I knew them. I had known them since the first time I had seen them. I was sixteen years old.

“I get it. You,” I started once more. “It was YOU. Over and over again, it was you. Only now you told me your name.”

He started for me again but I stopped him with a hand. He spoke instead. “I won’t hurt you. Just let me—”

I wasn’t aware I was crying or that I even felt like crying until I saw the first tear fall to the ground. I imagined it making a loud splashing sound in the silence.

“You have already hurt me.”

This time no amount of protest stopped him. He was in front of me. I read his tattoos clearly, just barely missing the understanding of their meaning. It was as if they were on the edge of my brain, but the harder I tried to focus on them, the harder they were to understand.

“Allow me to explain it to you. All of it.” He seemed to be pleading.

“Who are you here for?”

He frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Who are you taking with you this time?” I asked, wiping away my tears.

“I don’t know. It doesn’t work like that. I just saw your name again and—”

“My-my name? So it’s me?” I stuttered as I almost dropped to the ground in shock. No way. I was about to die? Well, shit.

“No, it’s complicated.”

“I have to get out of here. If you are going to kill me do it now. If not, leave me the hell alone.” I turned away and paused as steel resolve filled me. I turned back around coldly. “If you even think about taking Devon . . .” I let my words fade away, my tone slow and icy. I couldn’t lose Devon. He was all there was left to my life. I turned back to continue my retreat. He went back into his shadow, but not before he whispered, “I said I wouldn’t hurt you.”

It wasn’t until I got to the stairway of my apartment and my cell rang that I realized my purse still sat on the sidewalk where I dropped it. I frantically patted my legs and found my keys in my jeans pocket with the ringing phone. All that was in my purse was makeup, including my favorite lip-gloss,
grr,
and my wallet: ID, credit cards, cash and all. Damn it. I sighed as I answered the phone.

“Yeah?”

“Damn it! I thought you were dead.” It was Devon.

I started laughing. “Dude, you have no idea.” I put my hand on the stairwell and eased myself down to sit on the third step. “I just got home. I was going to call you.”

He sounded relieved. “But you’re okay?”

I nodded.

“You’re nodding, aren’t you?”

I smiled. “Yeah, I am.”

“You do know nodding only works if the person can see you, right?”

I shrugged. “It seems to work fine with you.”

“Because I know you are a little off. You’re really okay?”

I ran my fingers through my curls. “Yeah, I’m okay.”
Considering the fact that Death is stalking me,
I added silently.

“Good. Okay, I’m gonna go get myself laid then.”

“Nasty. Please wrap it up.”

“Always do, I can’t have any little Devons running around.”

I laughed. “Night, Devon.”

I went inside a few minutes later. Things were less scary now that my boogeyman had been identified. I still locked all the windows and doors out of habit. I dropped my keys, phone, and clothes on the floor, curled up in bed with Big Jim, and fell asleep. I’d worry about my purse and lost lip-gloss tomorrow.

The sunlight shining through my window woke me up. The one good thing about last night was I didn’t have to worry about crazies breaking in anymore. That was a huge weight off my shoulders. I got out of bed to retrieve my phone from where I’d dropped it last night. I should get a jump on canceling my credit cards. I walked into the living room and my clothes were not on the floor. Neither was anything else. What the hell? My cell rang and I swiveled toward the sound. It sat on my dining room table right next to my purse and folded clothes.

At first, I thought maybe Devon had stopped by to check on me, saw my mess, and decided to clean it up. But Devon doesn’t clean and it didn’t explain how the hell my purse got back here.

“Handiwork of my stalker, no doubt.” I shook my head with a sigh and rolled my eyes.

“And I hope you’re able to hear me, too.” I added as an afterthought.

I heard that soft, calm voice behind me. “Can’t you just say ‘Thank you?’“

I turned to face him. “No, sir, I cannot. You’re in my apartment. Don’t you see how that is a bit creepy?”

He shrugged and took a seat on my recliner. “You forgot your purse. Someone might have picked it up and there is information in there that could be used to
actually
stalk you.”

“Yeah, and we couldn’t have them doing that since that’s your job, right?”

“You know I’m not a stalker.”

I sighed. “Fine, I know that. Happy?”

He smiled and I got butterflies. Butterflies! I’m not a sixteen-year-old and yet here I am with freaking butterflies. I took a seat at my table and waited.

For a long time he stared at me, so I stared back. I was hoping to make him uncomfortable, but it wasn’t working. Even though I got the feeling he was even more accustomed to solitude than I was. When it got to be too much for me, at least I had Devon or my sister, whom I never got around to calling as I had planned to yesterday.

I wanted him to leave so I could get on with my day starting with a shower, but I didn’t want him to get a visual. Or, oh god! The corners of his mouth quirked into a hint of a smile.

“Do you watch me while I shower?” I blurted.

He raised a brow. “Do you want me to have watched you shower?” It sounded as if he meant it as a real question. Worse, he seemed to wait for an actual answer.

“No, I want you to
join
me in the shower,” I thought. Normally I wasn’t a fan of shower sex. It was too awkward and the water made it slippery—too dangerous for my taste.

It wasn’t until I noticed how silent Eric was that I looked up. His jaw was dang near hanging down to the floor from shock. Did I—? Damn it. I had said it out loud. The problem with being alone so much is you tend to develop a bad habit of voicing your thoughts out loud.

“I didn’t mean to say that out loud. I shouldn’t even have
thought
it. I’m sort of embarrassed. Besides, I really didn’t mean it.”

He nodded. “I’m aware of your habit of speaking to yourself through talking to the dog.”

“Yeah,” I conceded, “I guess I do that.”

“But let me explain what I need to first and if you still desire to invite me anywhere, I will go wherever it is you ask.”

My breath caught. He wasn’t being smooth or slick and it wasn’t a line he was trying to feed me. He said it with pure honesty. He seemed somehow very vulnerable at that moment. I fought my softening feelings toward him. I hadn’t felt the need for a physical connection in so long. But this was also deeper. I yearned to know him, to know little secrets about him just as he knew them about me. Granted, he knew the tidbits he did because he was stalking me, but the desire and emotion were still there. It scared me. He was a murderer. He had killed Dante, I reminded myself.

“Even if I were to ask you to go to Hell?” It was rude but it was the only response that didn’t compromise the conflicting feelings inside me.

“I’ve been there. It’s not that bad. Besides, it’s always good to see old friends again.”

His grin was wide and he was clearly impressed that he’d topped me. I had no idea if he was kidding or not.

“You’ve been to Hell?” I asked.

“Sheol, actually, is what he prefers.” His voice was low with a bit of gravel. He patted the space next to him. “Come, I will explain it all.”

“Actually, I really need to shower first. My day doesn’t stop because you want a little chat.”

He nodded. “I will wait.”

I walked out of the bathroom to see Big Jim being all cuddly with Eric.
Yes, Jim, way to be a guard dog, snuggle with the stalker.

“He’s completely useless. I don’t know why I keep him around.”

Eric covered Jim’s ears. “You are going to give him a complex.” He uncovered Jim’s ears. “He’s awesome, and you know it.”

Jim did his body wag, where his tail wags but so does everything else.

I rolled my eyes as I plopped down on the foot of the bed.

Eric raised his head. “Do you want to go get something to eat? You are hungry, right?”

“Do you eat?”

He laughed, and I realized that I liked the sound. I was really beginning to annoy myself.

“Yes, I eat. Let’s go out. My treat.”

“My two favorite words. Wait, you have money too?”

This time his laughter was unrestrained. “Well, my job sucks but it does have its benefits.” He kissed Jim on top of his head. “Are you ready?”

I considered his invitation. I shouldn’t want to go anywhere with him. I knew I should be on guard around him, he was planning to take from me again, but there was something about him that called to me, drew me to him. A vague feeling of familiarity and comfort, something that told me I knew him and to trust him. Maybe it was because he’d been stalking me, whatever. The point was, I was hungry and he was buying, so . . . What the hell?

We sat at the outside eating area of a small Indian restaurant with the sun shining down on us. I think he wanted privacy. Our food arrived and he kept looking down at his samosa. He appeared deep in thought and I didn’t want to interrupt. Besides, it gave me a chance to study his sharp features.

Everything about him was beautiful. With his head down, his dark curly hair fell forward across his face. I had this insane urge to reach out and brush it away, even though the gesture seemed way too intimate. I almost did it anyway. My hand reached out, but then he sighed and I caught myself, pulling my hand back.

“I am trying to figure out where to start. You must think I am a monster.”

I didn’t answer him. I knew I should hate him for the pain I’ve felt, and a part of me
did,
but looking at him now, that hatred wouldn’t surface.

“I understand if you despise me. It seems so unfair—what you are and who I am. I haven’t always had this duty, but I understand better than all of us. The point of it all, the self-sacrifice when everyone else practiced indulgence. This is my reward!” He gestured with his arms open wide in exasperation. “But I get it. Without what I do, nobody, NO ONE, would cherish anyone. No one would make the best of the time they are given, when it’s given. There would be no need for children or sex. When nobody dies, who needs birth? Do you get what I’m saying?” His eyes met mine, burning a hole to my soul.

I did get it. I was surprised I understood, but—

“What about those who keep losing to the point of ‘What’s the point?’” I couldn’t hold his gaze any longer.

“Part of the grand design,” he stared, sounding pissed and full of sarcasm, “is that no one on earth will leave without passing along something from his life. It will be passed down forever. So they are really always there through family and loved ones. The memories fade but they are never forgotten.”

“What if someone has no one? No family or no one who cares about them, what happens to them?”

His expression grew intense once more. “You care. And people like you. Memory Keepers. That’s where Memory Keepers come in. That is why you all were created and that is the reason you are here.”

“Memory Keepers?”

He nodded. “You are the ones who collect people, so to speak.”

“Why do you keep including me with these people?”

“Do you remember two months before your 17th birthday?”

I froze. That was a month and a half after Dante’s death. It had all gotten to be too much. The persistent sadness, pain, and bombardment of the memories we had shared. All of my firsts were with Dante, and he was gone.

“That was the night I tried, and failed, to kill myself,” I reluctantly admitted. I would always be ashamed at how I’d crumbled under the loss of Dante.

He disagreed. “You didn’t fail.”

“I’m not a ghost here. So yeah, obviously I did.”

“I called you. I kneeled beside you and put my mouth to your ear.” As he spoke, I could feel the heat of his breath as if he were beside me now, speaking into my ear.

“I called you, Mayne St LeClair.”

When he spoke my name, something in me rose up. I was free. Unrestrained. Free. Not even my body held me. Without warning, a jolt slammed me back down. My eyes widened.

“You died, but your duty caught you and you were not able to come. You woke and—”

My eyes snapped open, I took a breath, and I was looking into his eyes. “I saw you. I thought I was in Heaven.”

He saddened. “You thought I was Dante.”

I nodded and repeated my previous statement. “I thought I was in Heaven! Then I saw your eyes. They weren’t the pale sea-foam green I expected. They were your eyes, but not the honey they are now. They were a rich amber color.”