Authors: C.A. Harms
Lindsay
I sat on the bench just outside the Student Center. Bouncing Camden on my lap, I laughed every time he squealed in happiness. He had slept almost the entire drive to Normal, Illinois.
I had given up waiting for Taylor to welcome Camden and me for a visit. Instead, I packed up the car and set out to surprise her. I already knew her class schedule thanks to her mother and our sneaky ways. Another ten minutes and she would have no other choice but to be happy to see me.
“Wow.” I turned around quickly to come face-to-face with none other than Haven Rhoades—the bitch who attempted to destroy my life and the life of my son. “I guess he really does look like Zack.”
When she mentioned Zack’s name, it only infuriated me more.
“Yes, he looks just like his father.” I stood from the bench and pulled Camden in closer, as if to shield him from her poison.
“At least he’s cute; that gives me hope,” she said, and I was instantly confused.
“Hope for what?” She was such a snotty person. The cockiness rolled off of her in waves and truly killed her beauty. She had such an ugly soul.
“Didn’t Zack tell you?” She smiled brightly and it immediately gave me chills. “Your little guy is gonna have a brother or sister to play with soon.”
The confidence I felt only moments ago faded fast. In fact, I felt light-headed, as if I would pass out. She had to be screwing with my head.
Zack would have told me. Wouldn’t he?
“By the look on your face, I assume you didn’t know.” She shrugged confidently, and I still stood frozen as if this was some fucked up dream. “Maybe he was waiting until we found out the sex first.”
“You’re lying,” I whispered.
“I’m afraid not.” She reached into her purse and pulled out a pregnancy test.
Who the hell carried around a used test in their purse?
Even though I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction, my gaze instantly shifted toward the test, wrapped safely inside a plastic baggy. I could feel my chest burning as the bile rose in my throat.
It always happened. My entire life, things of this manner took from any joy I felt. No matter how big or small, my joy was always outweighed somehow by a dark cloud. Haven was now that dark cloud hovering over me, taking away my happiness.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I could hear Taylor’s angry words, yet I couldn’t look away from the item Haven held. I only hugged Camden closer and tried to fight off the tears.
“I just thought she should know,” Haven replied.
“Know what?” Taylor fired back as she stepped between Haven and me, blocking my view of that horrid test. “That you are a lying, deceiving, spiteful bitch? One who won’t take another test to prove this so-called pregnancy just keeps flashing this same old test around, as if that’s proof enough.”
“Normally, one positive pregnancy test is proof enough,” Haven said with a laugh.
“Not when you’re a fucking liar.” Taylor’s voice grew louder. “Who’d you pay to pee on the stick, Haven?”
“You honestly are that delusional. It’s true; I’m carrying Zack’s baby.” I looked up and an anger I didn’t know I had inside burst without warning.
“He doesn’t want it; in fact he gave me money so you could take care of the problem.” When she glared at me, I didn’t back down. “Sound familiar? The difference is this time it’s true. He said there would be nothing else in this world worse than having to share a child with you.”
“Well you can tell Zack there is no way out of this one.” She spun around on her heels and stalked off without a backward glance.
It was that moment when I took a few steps backward and collapsed against the bench, holding my son close.
“He didn’t want you to know until I could confirm it,” Tay whispered as she sat down at my side.
“You all knew but me.” The idea they hadn’t told me was irritating. No, I was blindsided by the bitch, with no ground to stand on.
“He found out just moments before he boarded the plane. He didn’t believe it, but he had no way to prove it. He was terrified this would come between the two of you and he asked me if I could figure it out.” I looked at her and could see the turmoil in her eyes. “His hands were tied and he didn’t want to leave you here to face the problem.”
I remained silent, still feeling like this entire thing was some crazy nightmare.
What if she wasn’t lying?
“She’s lying,” Taylor stated without hesitation. “I can feel it Linds; it just doesn’t seem right. He ignores her and she grows desperate. She needed a way to gain his attention.”
“She took a test,” I replied.
“No,” she shook her head. “Someone took a test, but something is telling me it wasn’t Haven.”
***
I was numb.
I had been numb since we left ISU and drove to Taylor’s parents’ house. I even remained in that state while everyone around us cooed and awed over Camden. He was fully entertained, and to be honest, I needed some time to compose myself. I needed a little time to deal with the possibility that Haven could be carrying the half-brother or sister of my son.
I felt territorial of Zack. He was mine. We had gone through hell already at Haven’s hands and her lies. I refused to allow her to come between us again.
I fought through the shock and the self-pity, and moved on to anger and revenge. As far as I was concerned, that bitch better hope she was pregnant because if she wasn’t, I was gonna beat her fucking ass.
I wanted to talk to Zack.
I needed him to know this would not come between what we had begun to build. I wouldn’t allow it. She had already taken time away from us, and the last thing I would give her was the satisfaction of knowing she was taking more.
Zack had been gone close to ten weeks, and it had been almost four since I last heard his voice. He had responded to a couple of my emails, but not recently.
Rita advised me to not worry. They could be on a mission and unable to make any contact. So I stopped checking excessively throughout the day, all day, every day, and now only looked once in the evening.
But right now, more than anything, I wanted to hear from him. It was almost like I had to have it to calm this rage inside me.
I was upset he didn’t confide in me, but then again, I understood why he chose to wait.
Zack
I was immediately transferred out of Iraq to a surgical facility in Afghanistan, where they stabilized and dressed my wound. They assessed the muscle and nerve damage before moving me again to a base in Germany.
I had been asked on many occasions if I wanted to contact family, yet I refused. There was no need to worry or upset any of them. They would all continue to believe I was still defending my country.
I had been told on a repeated basis just how lucky I was. Had the bullet hit me an inch or two to the left, it could have severed my femoral artery, possibly killing me within minutes. I would be placed on medical leave, and was having difficulty with the fact my brothers were still in danger without me by their side, but I had to accept my fate.
I would have hours, weeks, and months of therapy. It would be frustrating and disappointing, but I would get through it. I would come back from this and one day I would be cleared to go back to active duty.
So two weeks and five days after I was shot, I was back in California, standing in the airport. I bounced around, attempting to position the crutches that were already driving me fucking insane. I checked my flight number for the tenth time in the last ten minutes, growing agitated with the delay.
The only person who knew I was back was my mother, who insisted on coming to Coronado Beach to care for me. I had finally given in and spent the last week being pampered.
But now, I could no longer wait, and I wanted nothing more than to get on this damn flight to St. Louis and get to Lindsay and Camden.
***
Here I was, a grown ass man, hobbling up the pathway to the front door of Lindsay’s Grams. I ignored the strange look from her neighbor as he stood on his front porch, watching me like I was some drugged out thug attempting to rob the neighborhood.
Damn nosy bastard.
Before I could knock on the door it came flying open and I half expected Lindsay to come flying out in a rush, but there stood her Grams instead.
“Boy,” she said in her grandmotherly tone. Placing her hand on her hip, she just shook her head. “What on earth have you gotten yourself into?”
“Got shot,” I replied with a grin, and her face fell, now laced with concern. “I’m good, Grams, just need to see my girl and son.”
“They’re gone,” she said as she stepped aside, motioning for me to enter.
“What do you mean they’re gone?” My stomach flipped around nervously.
“Lindsay took off for Roanoke a couple days ago to visit with Taylor and her family.”
Again my stomach rolled.
“She’s in her home town?” I asked, trying to remain calm. The idea of her running into her parents made me sick. And then there was Haven.
“She’ll be back tomorrow,” she assured me. “You are welcome to stay.”
I shook my head as I began to back away. “I can’t wait another day, Grams. The last couple of months have been torture.”
When she flashed her smile and gave her head one knowing nod, I spun around and moved as fast as I could back to the rental car.
Zack: Lindsay with you?
I sent off one quick text before starting the car and putting the car in drive.
Taylor: Yes.
I took in a deep breath and tried to control the nervous feeling in my gut. But that quickly died when Taylor’s next message came through.
Taylor: Bad news. She knows. Haven cornered her the first day she got into town. And how in the hell are you texting me from your phone when you are supposed to be fighting bad guys in some desert?
Before I could respond my phone rang. It was Taylor.
“Hey,” I said in greeting.
“Tell me that by me calling I did not just tip off the enemy with your location,” she said in a hushed tone and I couldn’t help but chuckle.
“No,” I told her. “I’m actually on my way to Roanoke.”
“What?” This time she shrieked, and I immediately pulled the phone from my ear. “How is that possible?”
“I got wounded,” I replied. But before she could keep asking me questions, I wanted to be the one talking. “You said Lindsay knows. How did she take it?”
“Well, at first I was sure she was in a state of shock. She just stood there while that bitch went on and on about carrying your baby. Then she snapped and told Haven you didn’t want the baby, and had sent the money for an abortion.” She laughed as if remembering the scene. “Haven stormed off angrily; since then Lindsay has been quiet, and I’m not really sure what exactly she is feeling. But it’s obviously heavy on her mind.”
“Okay, well text me your address.” It would be the first place I went.
“Actually, we are getting ready to meet up with a few friends for dinner. Our reservations are at six in Bloomington.” We were both silent for a moment as my mind worked overtime.
“Wait, I have an idea.” I could hear the potential excitement in her voice. “Do you trust me?”
“Should I?” I asked.
“That depends. Do you want this entire thing to be over with so you and Lindsay can move forward?” she asked.
I wanted that more than anything. “Yes.”
Within seconds she was telling me her plan and I had to give her credit—it might just work. Then again, it could fucking backfire.
***
I impatiently waited outside of the restaurant where the girls were eating. I knew any moment Haven would show up, per my text. She thought she was meeting me for dinner to discuss her so-called pregnancy, but Taylor had set it up.
She wanted her to be blindsided by seeing Lindsay and I together. Plus, she also wanted Lindsay to see when I shared the story Taylor had come up with. In the end, we hoped it would backfire on Haven.
I was supposed to wait in the car until I saw Haven arrive, but the moment I looked up to see Lindsay, Taylor, and two other girls exit the restaurant, that entire plan went out the window. I was climbing from the car and hobbling toward them faster than I could register my own movements.
It was as if it all played out in slow motion. I could see Lindsay throw her head back in laughter at something one of the girls said. I saw the moment Taylor noticed me and the way she looked toward Lindsay and smiled, nudging her arm. And then that beautiful moment when the girl I loved noticed me standing there.
She stood frozen for a moment as she assessed me from head to toe. She noticed the crutches and the loose pants I wore over my bandaged leg. The way I held my leg up just enough to take the pressure off.
When her eyes met mine once more, I smiled, and that was all it took. She was moving toward me as her lower lip trembled.
“Hey there, pretty girl,” I said as she stopped only inches from me. “Don’t tease me, now,” I said with a chuckle. “Get over here and kiss me.”
It was the only invite she needed. The way she reached up and gripped the back of my neck as she pulled my head down to meet hers was demanding, giving me just a glimpse of my naughty girl.
“You’re here,” she whispered against my lips. Kissing me once more, she didn’t give me a moment to respond.
“I’ve missed you so much,” she said as she pulled back and I rested my forehead to hers. “I can’t believe you’re here. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine; looks worse than it is,” I assured her.
I saw movement to my left, and looked over to see Haven standing open-mouthed and angry, next to the flashy red sports car daddy bought.
I turned back to Lindsay and found her looking at Haven with a look of hate. It was a look I had never seen from her before. Linds was always so sweet and kind, yet I understood why she directed such anger toward Haven.
“Hey,” I whispered, and she looked back at me. “Whatever I’m about to say, I just need you to go along with it and not act surprised. Okay?”
She nodded hesitantly.
“So what, you two are together now?” Haven spit out in disgust.
“We’ve been together, but you knew that.” And so it began. “It is exactly why you put forth this little plan of yours to come between us. But there is just one problem with your plan.”
“You need to get over this denial, Zack.” Haven said as she crossed her arms over her chest.
“Taylor has a little snitch that works at your OB-GYN office. Seems the two of you have the same doctor. It’s amazing what a little money thrown in the right direction will get you.” The cocky smile she wore faltered just enough for me to notice. “It would seem that you were just in the clinic last week for your Depo shot, at which time they performed a pregnancy test. Guess what that test showed?”
I waited for her to speak but she remained silent. Normally she had so much to say.
“Negative,” I answered for her.
“There are such things as a false negative,” she sneered.
“That’s what I thought, too,” I said, and she smiled again. “Which is why I went to your father and told him you’re pregnant.”
“You what?” Her eyes grew wide in surprise and she looked like she swallowed a golf ball.
“Yeah…he wasn’t happy. He actually mentioned something about cutting off your financial support, and leaving you and your bastard baby for me to take care of.” I adjusted my crutches and until that moment, I don’t think she even took the time to notice I was hurt. “See, that is where the problem lies. I’ve been given a discharge from the Navy, and as of now, I have no income. So there’s not much I can offer, but I will do my best to take care of this baby. We may have to get some help from the state for a while to take care of him or her.”
The more I talked, the paler her face grew. It was almost comical as she opened her mouth to talk, and then clamped it shut once more, wrinkling her nose when I mentioned public aid.
She was too prissy and high class. Taylor came up with this plan to lay out this imaginary life, and knew without a doubt Haven would be less than pleased.
“I can’t believe you went to my father.” She appeared horrified. “And public assistance—are you insane?”
I heard Taylor giggle, but refused to look away from Haven. She looked at any moment like her head would spin.
“Well, how else do you expect us to raise the baby?” I shrugged like it was the only option. And just like that it all unfolded. We had laid the ground work and stepped back to let Haven do the rest.
“Oh my god, you have ruined my life.” She reached into her purse and pulled out her phone. “Now I have to clean up this goddamn mess you created, and convince my father you are some deranged idiot who planned this scene to terrorize me.”
“I just figured we may need his help for a while, and I wanted to talk to him and explain my situation,” I assured her, still playing the game. “We may not be able to be together as a couple, but we will have to work together for our child.”
“Will you just stop already?” She threw her hands up in the air and literally stomped her foot like some fucking two-year-old. “There is no baby, you dumb ass.”
She let out a deep breath and attempted to dial her phone, when she suddenly stopped and looked up to see both Taylor and I laughing at her irritation. “You two planned this entire thing, didn’t you?”
“And you fell for it, just like I knew your worthless, sorry ass would. There was no way you would go without daddy’s money, and Zack’s injury helped us convince you he no longer had an income.” Taylor smiled proudly, and I suddenly had a new found love for my girl’s best friend.
“You’re still a SEAL aren’t you?” she asked with narrowed eyes.
I felt a nudge at my side as Lindsay stepped in front of me and squared off her shoulders. Without warning, she lifted her hand and swung, slapping Haven with an open hand. The sound of flesh against flesh echoed through the parking lot.
Haven gasped, Taylor laughed even harder, and I stood shocked as I stared at Lindsay’s back. Never in my life had I expected her to step up and belt Haven, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t damn proud.
“You’ve screwed with my life long enough, bitch. The games are fucking over. Try me again, come near my family one more time, and I’ll run your ass over without looking back to make sure you’re still moving.” Haven wanted to say something back, I could tell, but instead huffed and smoothed her shirt before turning around and walking off toward her car.
Lindsay’s shoulders shook with anger, and I wondered for a moment if I should touch her. She seemed so damn sweet all the time; I had never expected this side of her.
When I placed my hand on her shoulder, she looked back at me with wide eyes. “I can’t believe I just said that. I couldn’t run someone over.”
My chest shook with laughter as I pulled her back against me and buried my face in her hair.
“I know, sweetheart,” I assured her. “But Haven doesn’t.”