Deceive (Declan Reede: The Untold Story #2) (15 page)

I couldn’t tell her how close to the truth she was. She shifted her chair a little closer to mine and grabbed my hands in hers.

“I think of you as my baby brother. You know that, right? I’m here for you. Always.”

Her statement shocked me, but the depth of emotion in her eyes made me see it for the absolute truth that it was. I didn’t know what words I could respond with—didn’t even know how to start. I settled for something simple. “Thanks, Edie.”

She ruffled my hair to lighten the mood. I growled playfully at her and then she clasped my hands again.

“So . . .” She raised her eyebrow at me and held up my cut knuckles.

I sighed and pulled one hand from her loose grasp and began to scratch my back without thinking. “I don’t even know where to fucking begin.”

I pulled myself away from her completely and stood against the railing, looking down over the busy mall below. Bending forward, I let loose a grunt of frustration. I spun around to look at Eden again. She was sitting patiently, waiting for me to be ready to continue talking.

“I told you a little bit of the story already. About Phoebe.”

Eden nodded and beamed. Obviously she was anxious to get on to that topic. I thought of Emmanuel and Alyssa, and decided to dwell on Phoebe for a little while longer. I grabbed my wallet out of my pants and pulled Phoebe’s photo from it. I handed it to Eden, who took it eagerly.

“Oh, Dec. She’s beautiful. She has—”

“My eyes.” I cut her off. “Yeah, I know.”

I shuddered when I thought about my initial reaction to seeing the photo. To knowing instantly that she was my daughter because of those eyes.

“She’s so beautiful, Edie. And smart as a fucking whip too.”

Eden looked over the photo for another moment before handing it back. I stared at it as I continued, drawing comfort from those soft, gentle eyes staring out at me. Even in this photo it felt like she could see into my soul, but it didn’t feel like I was being judged.

“What I haven’t told you though is that when I left Brisbane, Alyssa was pregnant with twins.”

“Twins?” Eden’s face lit up, but then fell on seeing my expression. I didn’t know what I looked like, but I knew what I felt. I put the photo of Phoebe back in my wallet because I could swear her eyes had turned accusatory. Eden walked over to me and wrapped her hands around my waist. I dropped my forehead to her shoulder and took comfort in her presence. In her friendship.

“What happened?” she asked in a quiet voice.

I told her what Alyssa had told me. When I finished the story I was surprised to see the tears on her face, matching my own.

“I had no idea,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry. How is Alyssa now? I can’t even imagine . . .”

“Alyssa’s . . .” I tried to think of the best word to use. “Strong.” I hoped to God Eden knew what I meant. I didn’t know how to articulate it better than that. There were parts of Alyssa that were broken beyond repair, but she had the inner strength to pull together the damaged parts and continue to live. To love.

I pulled at the collar of my shirt again. It was really starting to irritate the fuck out of me.

“What is it?” Eden asked. “You’ve been playing with your shirt on and off since you picked me up. Did you use the wrong washing powder or something?”

I shook my head and turned around. I pulled the collar of my shirt down a little to show her the now uncovered, but quickly scabbing, artwork on my back.

“Wow,” she said. “Can I get a better look at that?”

A week ago, a month, I might have told her to fuck off, and that I wasn’t getting half-naked in front of her. But I was proud of my children and wanted to show her that. With my back still turned to her, I undid the buttons on my shirt and pulled it off. A second later, I felt her fingers tracing along the outside of the design.

“It’s just beautiful.” She wrapped her arms around me and rested her head against my shoulder. “Thank you for sharing this with me.”

I nodded. Like I’d noticed with Dr. Henrikson, sharing with Eden had taken another tiny weight away. So small it was barely noticeable, but enough to help my frame of mind.

After we stood like that for a few more minutes, I decided the mood had been too heavy and serious for too long. I owed it to Alyssa to let go of my stress for a while so that I could show her a good time tomorrow. With Alyssa in mind, I twisted my body, grabbing Eden into a headlock and mussing up her hair.

“Declan, you jackass!” she squealed, trying to yank herself from my arms. “We almost had a grown-up moment then.”

“I know, Edie,” I said. I let her go and ran back inside the room. I glanced around it—I still had find a way to get rid of the images of Alyssa the morning after the school formal, but Eden was doing a good job of keeping me sane at the moment. “So, what have you got planned for tonight?”

“Dinner at the Sunshine Room, and then daiquiris at the casino.” She grinned widely.

“Eden, you know I’m a dude right? This—” I grabbed my crotch. “—qualifies me as such. Dudes don’t do daiquiris. Those are girly drinks.”

“Oh, but look at those pretty locks of yours, Dec.” She jumped up and grabbed a handful of my hair, which was rapidly getting out of control without my regular trips to get it cut. “I’m sure I could put a nice barrette in there, maybe slip you into a turquoise dress to match your eyes. With your inch-long lashes and pretty pout, I think you’d make a hot chick.”

I scowled at her. “You know you are just about the right weight for me to pick up and toss over that balcony.”

She smirked at me. “I’d like to see you try.”

I feigned a shrug and walked away, before quickly running back at the last minute and throwing her over my shoulder. I carried her back outside and sat her on the railing, with my arms wrapped around her to ensure she didn’t accidentally slip.

“Declan Reede, you fucking arse, let me down,” she screamed as she clung tightly to my shoulders, squeezing her eyes shut. “You know I hate heights.”

“What were you saying about me?”

“That you are a manly man who has no feminine aspects at all.”

“Exactly,” I said, before pulling her back off the balcony rail. I flipped her around me and put her back on her feet. She smacked my chest before running into the room. Before I could follow her inside, she slid the door shut and locked it. She stood on the other side of the glass and poked her tongue out at me.

“Oh, you are going to get it, Edie!” I shouted.

She pretended she couldn’t hear me, making ridiculously overemphasised gestures of cupping her ears.

“All right, you’ve had your laugh,” I said. “Now, let me in.”

She shook her head and laughed.

I clasped my hands together and held them in from of me. “Please?” I begged, pushing my bottom lip out.

“Uh-uh.”

“What do I have to do to get back inside?”

She tapped her chin. “You have to say Morgan is the best driver at Sinclair Racing.”

“Oh, I see,” I said, laughing. “So for me to come in, I’ve got to lie. Yeah, that’s not gonna happen.”

She shrugged and started to walk off toward the bathroom. I’d been on the road with Eden enough to know that her in the shower “getting ready” usually meant a good hour or two. I debated whether I wanted to remain on the balcony with no entertainment for that long.

“Fine,” I said with a sigh. “Morgan McGuire is the best driver at Sinclair Racing.”

She unlocked the door and slid it open a little. I pushed my way past her and heard the door slide shut again after I’d passed.

“Apart from me,” I added, before ducking for cover.

“You’re lucky we’ve got reservations. Otherwise . . .”

“I’d like to see you try something.” I winked.

She poked out her tongue at me one last time before disappearing into the bedroom to get ready for our dinner. A second later she came back out, carrying a suit bag.

“I brought a suit from home for you. I figured you wouldn’t have packed one for London.”

Giving her a half-smile, I thanked her for thinking of it. At least I wouldn’t look a complete shambles beside her no-doubt perfect appearance.

I pulled my shirt back on before I sat on the couch and flicked on the TV. For a moment, I debated ringing Alyssa while I waited for Eden. I really wanted to hear her voice again. It wasn’t hard to see that I was already completely and utterly pussy-whipped but couldn’t find it in myself to care. I pulled out my phone to ring her but when I saw the time, I stopped myself. She wouldn’t finish work for another hour.

Not really focused on anything, I flicked through the channels for a while. I knew Eden would be a little while yet. Half an hour later, I grew bored of the TV. I walked over and knocked on the bedroom door.

“What time were the reservations for?” I asked through the closed door.

“Seven thirty,” Eden called back.

Because it was a little after seven, I figured it was time for me to get ready. Within ten minutes, I was ready to go, just as Eden pulled open the bedroom door to reveal a red dress, coiffed hair, and face full of make-up. She could have been heading out for a red carpet event rather than a casual night on the town.

We walked the short distance to the Sunshine Room, with Eden talking non-stop about Morgan the whole way. I just smiled and nodded in the appropriate places—at least, I think they were the appropriate places. I really didn’t know for sure.

Eden gave her name at the door and we were ushered through to a table. She watched me meaningfully as I sat across from her.

“So,” she said after a moment. “Tell me everything about Alyssa.”

One meal, four hours, and eight daiquiris later, we finally stumbled back to the hotel room, giggling. I don’t know what was funny—I wasn’t sure if it was the palm trees in front of the casino, the dumpsters we passed in Elizabeth Street, or the hushed whispers of the hotel clerks as we passed them. Whatever it was, it had Eden and me in hysterics until we finally collapsed side by side onto the couch, unable to breathe.

“Thanks, Eden,” I said when I was finally able to draw some breath. “I had fun tonight.”

It was the truth. It was nice to have a night without the stress of a potential relationship and without worrying about upsetting anyone with what I said. For the first time in weeks, I could just be me. Eden could like it or lump it—stay or fuck off—and it wouldn’t really matter. The drunker we got, the more we insulted and teased each other. The barbed words didn’t affect either of us, because it didn’t matter. Neither of us gave a shit. We would still be teammates and friends at the end. There was no bullshit between us.

With Alyssa, I felt like I was walking on fucking eggshells all the fucking time. I hoped the date I had planned might fix that. Eden knew all about my plans from Danny and had offered me a few suggestions to tweak them. Suggestions I was more than happy to implement.

“I’m going to bed, shithead,” Eden said with a giggle as she stumbled to the bedroom. We’d never agreed that I was staying the night, but we didn’t need to—it had been an unspoken agreement between us.

“Whatever, bitch.” I laughed.

“I gotta be at the airport early in the morning,” she slurred. “I got an early flight.”

“You gotta be at the airport early ’cause I got a fuck-hot date to get to and I am not missing that for shit. If you’re not ready, I’m leaving you here.”

“Touché.” She pointed at the ceiling and did a funny little pirouette, twisting her legs around each other until she was tangled and fell unceremoniously on her arse.

I didn’t stand or offer to help; I couldn’t, because I was laughing far too hard. I’d end up on my arse if I tried. My laughter continued until one of her shoes sailed over my head. Then I stared blankly at the wall where it hit for a few seconds before I couldn’t control the laughter anymore and it burst out again. I heard Eden giggling once more as she shut the bedroom door.

With a goofy smile on my face, I laid myself out along the length of the couch and thought about the night. It was almost fucking perfect; the best escape I could have asked for to help cope with all the shit that I’d had to deal with lately. I was actually happy Eden had taken time out of her schedule to come to see me. I’d gathered fairly quickly that this trip was actually impacting her preparations a little, but she’d been worried about me. There was only one thing missing from the evening that would have made it absolutely perfect—Alyssa.

I pulled out my phone, stifling another giggle that rose to my throat—Eden had forced the fucking girlie drinks on me, and now I was fucking giggling like one. I wrote Alyssa a text to let her know I was thinking about her even though I couldn’t be with her.

After putting my phone on the coffee table in front of the couch, I let my thoughts of Alyssa take over my mind. I fucking wanted her—so badly. The forced celibacy hurt more than I’d expected it to. I was happy to respect her wishes, but goddamn did I want to re-enact our London night as soon as I could.

The alcohol coursing its way pleasantly through my system was making me so fucking horny it wasn’t funny. I rubbed my hand up and down the length of my thigh, desperately aching for Alyssa’s touch to soothe the fires that erupted there. I pictured her as she had been that afternoon when I’d seen her at the shop. Professional, smiling, blushing, and fucking gorgeous. My hand had just made its way up the length of my thigh and grabbed my shaft when my phone rang. I grabbed it quickly, thinking it might have been Alyssa.