Deceiving the Duke of Kerrington (Ladies of Deception) (16 page)

Part 3

Chapter 20

            One of the hardest things
Hope had to do was to leave Pierce at Ridgecrest Manor while she traveled with
Esther back to the Earl of Brattondale’s townhouse in Mayfair. Now that they
had both openly admitted their love for each other, they scarce could be
separated. Pierce had been just as reluctant to let her go but reminded her
that she had wedding preparations to attend to and a trousseau to assemble in
London and that while she was gone he would be busy preparing the small chapel
on his estate for their wedding as well as planning their wedding trip, which
he insisted must be a surprise.

            The day before she left he
had taken her on a ride to the chapel nestled in a cozy setting next to a small
pond. There had been a thick mist that morning leftover from the previous night’s
rain and it had only added to the charm of the white stone chapel that was
hundreds of years old, giving it the appearance of floating on a bed of clouds.
The tall windows reached heavenward ending in points that seemed to direct the
patron’s eyes in that very direction, the massive wood doors were arched and
featured intricate iron work. It was where Pierce’s parents had been married
and it was perfect for the wedding they both envisioned—a small affair with
family and a few friends. Neither of them was anxious to make a spectacle
though Pierce knew very well that’s exactly what the ton anticipated and
expected. He however didn’t care, this was their wedding and they would do it
their way.

            Everything from the moment
that Pierce had proclaimed his love for her had seemed so surreal to Hope. She
hardly dared fall asleep at night for fear that she’d awake in the morning and
find out she had only been dreaming. After Pierce had helped her into the
carriage he leaned forward and placed a hand on her face, noticing the stark
contrast of his tanned skin next to her own alabaster skin. He tenderly ran his
thumb from her cheek down to her lips where he gently caressed them before
leaning in and planting a firm kiss on her lips.

            When Hope finally gathered
her wits about her she spoke breathlessly, “I don’t think I can handle a goodbye
from you.”

            Pierce smiled, “Then no goodbyes
will be spoken. And you have my word that the next time I see you you’ll never
have to leave my side again.”

            “Never?” she asked hopefully
and skeptically all at the same time.

            Pierce laughed, “Of course
I’ll still have matters of business to attend to and I imagine once in awhile
Elliot will persuade me to attend White’s with him but,” he reached out and
tweaked her nose, “I’ll always come home to you, we’ll never be apart for
long.”

            Hope leaned back on the
bench of the carriage and sighed, “It sounds splendid.”

            “Perfectly splendid, now you
better be off.” He stepped back from the carriage, resisting the urge to take
her in his arms once more for he knew if he allowed himself another touch he
wouldn’t be able to let her go. He stood in the drive and watched until the
carriage was out of sight, feeling lonely all of a sudden once Noelle’s
presence wasn’t there to infiltrate Ridgecrest manor and every crevice of his
heart.

Hope couldn’t
help but reminisce about the ride they had made to Ridgecrest Manor a short
week ago. Then Pierce had seemed such an enigma, somebody she would be forced
to tolerate as a favor for Noelle. She remembered his outrageous claim of
playing the pianoforte and the way he goaded her about her writings. She smiled
to herself, now realizing she must have been attracted to him even then and
more interested than she’d even been willing to admit, for if she had been
truly indifferent to him she wouldn’t have let him rile her so.

            By the time they arrived
back in Mayfair, Hope was looking forward to a warm bath to wash away the dirt
and grime from the road. She was informed immediately upon entering the house
that Devon and Lord Brattondale were attending the theater and she couldn’t even
pretend to be disappointed by the news. She took her much anticipated bath then
afterwards had a tray of food brought to her. She ate hungrily of the beef stew
and crusty bread while Esther brushed her hair before the fire, lulling her
into a complete trance, her thoughts reliving every glance, every touch from
Pierce as she highly anticipated a lifetime of scorching encounters.

            It was no surprise that when
she fell asleep that night that she dreamt of Pierce, for she already missed
his company dreadfully. She thought in her sleep induced haze that she heard a
noise in her room but before she could rouse herself fully awake the room was
silent once more and she turned over and immediately fell back into her
pleasant dreamland, all thoughts centered on Pierce.

            Her next awareness was of a
hand on her shoulder shaking her not so gently back and forth. She struggled to
peel her eyes open, wondering almost excitedly if Pierce had really come to her
as she had been dreaming he would. In the dark shadows of the room she could
barely make out a petite form and she gasped, instantly coming completely
alert. She sat up in bed and reached towards the nightstand searching for
something, anything to defend herself against her would be attacker. 

As she felt her
hand close on a brass candlestick the stranger spoke, “Hope, it’s me Noelle.
Now be quiet, we need to talk without you waking anyone.”

She
instinctually reached for Noelle’s face then grasped at her hair, knowing she’d
recognize the feel of her mistress’s hair anywhere, having to be reassured that
it truly was her. Her head was spinning, she never in a million years thought
she would ever lay eyes, or hands on Noelle again. Something in her heart told
her something wasn’t right as a sick dread filled her belly. She tried to
ignore the bad feelings as she asked, “What are you doing here? I thought you
went to America.”

Noelle’s voice
was shaky as she began, “We never made it onto the ship.”

The feeling of
dread increased tenfold, “What do you mean you never made it? Where’s Soren.”

Noelle sobbed,
“He’s dead!” Hope gasped so loud that Noelle reached over to cover her mouth
with one hand before hissing, “Shhh…I told you to be quiet, if anyone finds us
both here everything will be ruined.”

Hope nodded
silently, too shocked to speak. “I have nothing now. I had no choice but to
come back, you understand don’t you? The only consolation I had was knowing you
would be tremendously relieved to put an end to this act I forced on you.”

Hope’s thoughts
were all jumbled, for though she heard clearly every word Noelle spoke she
couldn’t seem to make sense of the words. “Where’s Soren?” she asked once more,
needing some clarification.

“I told you
already and please don’t make me say it again. The thought is too much to
bear.”

“But how? I
mean, what happened? Did something happen at sea?”

Noelle shook her
head, “I told you we never made it to sea. The day we were supposed to depart
Soren was informed of some delays with the cargo he was carrying back to
America. The crew was supposed to be sorting everything out but said it could
take days before we’d be ready to set sail so we had no choice but to wait and
so we…” her voice broke off and she became silent except for the sniffles Hope
heard indicating she was sobbing once more.

Hope’s heart
broke on her behalf as she reached over and embraced Noelle, pulling her head
to her shoulder as she stroked her hair in a motherly fashion. After a few
minutes Noelle was able to speak once more, “One night he received a note from
his first mate asking him to come to the docks. I begged him not to leave for
it was late and I’ve heard stories of how dangerous the docks can be after dark
but he thought I was just being silly and overprotective and he assured me he
was more than capable of handling himself. He never came back. I received word
just this morning that he had been killed by some thugs that were lurking
around the docks trying to break in and steal precious cargo from the ships
waiting to sail. Apparently it was a matter of being in the wrong place at the
wrong time.”

“You poor dear,
I’m so sorry.”

“Oh Hope, the
last thing I wanted to do was to come back. I should be sailing toward America
right now, Soren by my side. Instead I was left completely alone, penniless
with no option but to return and marry the insufferable Duke of Kerrington, a
fate worse than death.”

Hope stiffened
at her words, her heart turning chill. Noelle’s presence meant only one thing
for Hope, that she would now be forced to turn Noelle’s life back over to her,
to let her marry Pierce like she was rightfully supposed to do in the first
place. A panic like nothing she had ever known filled her breast—she knew she
couldn’t leave Pierce to marry Noelle, she’d just as soon die, but she knew
that it was no longer in her control. With Noelle’s reappearance she was once
again plain Hope Hillburn, common servant. No, she corrected herself, she
wasn’t even a servant anymore, for she had lost that position to Esther when
she had told the earl that Noelle’s lady’s maid had ran off with a stable boy.

Despair settled
over her and she desperately wanted to crawl under the thick counterpane and
fall back into her dream filled sleep where she had been content and happy to
dream of a future that she now knew she would never own. The girls sat in tense
silence, both filled with an agony and loss the other couldn’t fully
comprehend. Hope thought about explaining to Noelle that she and the duke had
fallen in love, hoping to convince her that she had to remain in her role as
Noelle or her heart would be broken into pieces. She knew that argument would
never work, for she was merely a former servant, a plain girl with not a drop
of blue blood in her veins and no amount of love could compensate for that
reality.

After what
seemed an eternity of wallowing in her own self pity, Hope’s thoughts turned to
Noelle. She knew that she shouldn’t be so selfishly devastated by the news that
Pierce would never be hers, at least not the way she had come to want and
desire him. Though she would never marry him, touch him, or even see him again,
at least she would live knowing he was alive somewhere and had the hope of
happiness in his future, unlike Soren who no longer had that option.

And though she
should’ve felt at least a little reassured by that fact, all she felt was
nauseous—the thought of Noelle marrying Pierce, of him kissing her and of her
bearing his children made her ill. Stretched before her was an entire lifetime
of knowing he would forever belong to someone else and that she would never
have him. She was back to feeling self pity and she selfishly thought that it
would’ve been better to have lost him to death than to someone else.

Sensing Hope’s
melancholy, Noelle turned to her and asked, “I thought you’d be glad to return
to your old life, why the sad face?”

“Oh Noelle,
don’t you see? Nothing will ever be the same again, not for either one of us.
My heart absolutely breaks to hear you have lost the love of your life and now
I will be losing—“

Noelle cut her
off, “Oh Hope! I know you must think me dreadfully selfish to waltz back in and
stake claim to my life forcing you to give up the fancy dresses and a life of
ease. I can’t offer you a position, as you well know, and I have no money right
now but I can get some soon and send it to you to help compensate you for all
you’ve done.”

Hope felt dirty
by her offer of money to compensate her—for what? For falling in love with the
man Noelle was supposed to marry? For living the most magical few weeks of her
life and experiencing something she’d never thought to experience in her
lifetime—love? No amount of money could ever compensate for that and she
desperately wanted to tell Noelle that but knew she couldn’t. She was a realist
and knew that she may never find another lady’s maid position without a note of
recommendation from Lord Brattondale, which would be impossible to acquire.
She’d have to look for other work and who knew how long it would take her to
secure a post. She knew she’d be foolish to turn away the money.

“Send it in care
of my mother in Shepard’s Bush, for that is where I will be.”

Noelle knelt on
the bed next to her and hugged her shoulders, “I know I can never repay you for
all you’ve done for me. I wish you every happiness.”

“Likewise
milady,” then somehow she managed to choke out the next words beyond the lump
in her throat, “And take care of Pierce, he’s a good man and will make you
happy if you let him. Please make him happy too.”

Warm tears
escaped the corners of her eyes and streamed down her cheeks as she somehow
managed to change into a simple day dress in the dark before gathering the few
belongings that were her own to take with her and stuffing them into the valise
Noelle had brought back with her on her return. As she was rummaging through
the jewelry box in search of her mother’s ruby necklace she came across the
amber stone necklace Pierce gave her and was tempted to add it to her bag so
that she’d have some sort of physical reminder of his love and the short time
they had had together. She reluctantly let it slide back into the velvet lined
drawer of the box knowing it didn’t truly belong to her but to the future
Duchess of Kerrington and that the only thing she’d have to take with her were
memories.