Deenie (2 page)

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Authors: Judy Blume

Tags: #Juvenile Fiction, #Girls & Women, #Social Issues, #Adolescence, #Self-Esteem & Self-Reliance, #Special Needs

BOOK: Deenie
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"It was okay," I said.

"Me and Janet went to Woolworth's. She tried on orange lipstick and brown eyeshadow."

"Did she get caught? "

"Of course not."

When we go to Woolworth's Janet's the best at trying on junk without buying. You're not supposed to do that but Janet always gets away with it. The one time I tried on some nail polish the saleslady caught me and I had to buy the whole bottle.

"
And
we saw Harvey Grabowsky," Midge said.

"You did?"

"Yes. We followed him all around the store."

"Did he say anything?"

"He never even noticed."

"Oh."

Harvey is the best looking guy in ninth grade. He's also on the football team and President of his class. Harvey has never said one word to me. I guess he doesn't talk to seventh-grade girls at all.

As soon as I hung up the phone rang again. It was Janet.

"We followed Harvey Grabowsky in Woolworth's," she said.

"I know. I just talked to Midge."

"Did she tell you what he bought?"

"No … what?"

"Three ballpoint pens and a roll of Scotch tape. And once I stood right next to him and touched his shirt sleeve!"

I just knew I'd miss out on something great by going to New York.

Monday morning I got up early so I wouldn't have to rush. I wanted to make sure I looked my best because of cheerleading tryouts that afternoon. Most times I don't even think about the way I look but on special occasions, like today, being good looking really comes in handy. Not that a person has any choice about it. I'm just lucky.

The only girl I know who's not trying out for cheerleading is Midge. She would rather be
on
the football team. No kidding, she's tough! And she's the biggest kid in seventh grade, boys and girls included. When she gets to ninth grade if they don't let her try out for football she's going to court to sue the school Jfor sexual discrimination. I used to think that meant something else but now I know the truth. In fifth grade we had a gym teacher who never gave the girls a chance to shoot baskets. I wish I had known about sexual discrimination then.

Me and Janet have been practicing our cheers in her garage for two weeks. My mother doesn't know anything about it. She'd kill me. A lot of the games are on Saturdays and if I make the squad she won't be able to drag me around to any more modeling agencies. I'm counting on Daddy to make Ma understand … I'd really like to be a cheerleader
and
a famous model. If only getting to be a model wasn't so much trouble. It would be fun to see my face in some magazine, if it could get there without my going through all those dumb interviews!

By the time I got down to the kitchen Ma had my orange juice ready and an egg in to boil. Daddy is never around in the morning. He leaves the house before the rest of us get up. He's got a gas station on Rahway Avenue and he opens for business at six-thirty.

"You look special this morning," Ma told me.

"I do?"

"Yes, you do."

"Thanks, Ma."

"Drink all your juice. Vitamin C is very important."

"I'm drinking it."

My mother makes sure I have breakfast every single day. She's really fussy about what I eat. She leaves Helen alone but watches me like a hawk. She thinks if she's in charge of my diet I'll never get pimples or oily hair. I hope she's right. Helen has a little of both and so does her best friend, Myra Woodruff. Aunt Rae says they're in the awkward stage.

As soon as I cracked my egg Helen walked into the kitchen. She doesn't talk in the morning. And she doesn't eat breakfast either. She just sucks on an orange and drinks coffee.

A car horn tooted outside. It was Myra's father who gives Helen a ride to the high school. She took one gulp of coffee and ran out the front door.

I meet Midge at her corner every morning. We catch the bus together. Her father's our family dentist but he didn't put Helen's braces on. He sent her to an orthodontist for that. She's through with her braces now and Daddy's glad because braces are very expensive. He used up his whole savings account paying for them. I know because I heard Ma tell that to Aunt Rae. Helen's teeth look pretty good. They're very straight and she's always brushing them.

Our town doesn't have school buses, except for the one that picks up the handicapped kids. They come to our school from all over because we have a Special Class. Gena Courtney, who lives on my street, takes that bus. We were in first grade together until her accident. She was hit by a delivery truck. Now she wears braces on her legs and she's blind in one eye. I always feel funny when I pass her house—like I should stop and say hello—but then I think I better not, because I wouldn't know how to act or anything.

We get student discount tickets to use on the public bus. Janet gets on a few stops after me and Midge, so we always save her a seat. When she got on this morning she came running back to where we were and as soon as she sat down she opened her purse and pulled out a raw chicken's foot. She poked me and Midge with it—so naturally we screamed because who'd want to be touched by that! So the old grouch bus driver yelled, "Shut up back there or I'll put you off! " Janet put her chicken's foot away.

"Why are you carrying that thing around with you, anyway?" Midge asked her.

"For good luck," Janet said.

"A
rabbit's
foot means good luck, stupid," I told her.

"I can't carry one of those around," Janet said. "Rabbits aren't kosher. And I need something to bring me good luck this afternoon. I'm so nervous about tryouts I'm sick to my stomach."

"Does your father know you swiped a chicken's foot?" Midge asked.

"I didn't swipe it. He gave it to me."

Janet's father is a butcher and his store is right near Daddy's gas station. There are Hebrew letters on the window. Janet says they're just to let people know that he's a kosher butcher. One time me and Midge called for Janet at her father's store. Mr. Kayser had just gotten in a whole batch of dead turkeys. They were the ugliest things I'd ever seen. They weren't packaged nice like in the supermarket. They just looked like dead birds with feathers and everything. But the worst part was when Mr. Kayser reached inside one and pulled out this disgusting mess of gutsy stuff and some of it was purple! Me and Midge thought we'd vomit right on the sawdust but Janet just laughed and laughed.

We got to school just as the last bell rang. We said goodbye until lunchtime and headed for our homerooms. Mine's on the second floor. Susan Minton was waiting at my desk. She's always hanging around me. She says a lot of people think we look alike. I can't see it at all but whatever way I wear my hair Susan wears hers. And today she had her shirt buttoned up the back, the way I wore mine last Friday.

"I can't wait for this afternoon, Deenie," Susan said, while I put my books in my desk. "Aren't you excited about tryouts?"

"Not especially," I said. I would never tell her the truth.

"Everybody thinks you're going to make the squad."

"That's silly," I said.

"But everybody thinks so anyway."

I can't stand Susan and the way she talks. One time I complained about her at home and Ma said it's just that Susan looks up to me and I should feel flattered. But I don't. She's such a pain! And I don't think it's a compliment that she's always copying me either. I wish she wasn't in my homeroom.

All morning I thought about cheerleading tryouts and I went over my cheers and jumps a thousand times in my mind, so I didn't hear Mr. Fabrini when he called on me in English and he said I should stop dreaming about what I was going to eat for lunch and start paying attention.

Some days I bring my lunch from home and other days I buy it. It all depends on what Ma's got in the refrigerator. Today there wasn't anything good so I stood on line to buy the school lunch.

Midge usually gets to the cafeteria before me and Janet so she saves us a place. She brings the same lunch every day—two hard-boiled eggs. But all she eats is the white part—the yolks wind up in the garbage.

Harvey Grabowsky always sits at one special table over in the corner. Nobody would dare sit there unless Harvey said it was okay. And he never waits on line for his lunch either. He's got a bunch of girls who do everything for him. Those girls are really stupid! I would never stand on line for the privilege of bringing Harvey Grabowsky his lunch. I wouldn't even do it for Buddy Brader, unless he asked me very nicely and had a good reason, like a broken leg or something.

When I carried my lunch over to where Midge and Janet were sitting I saw that Buddy and two of his friends were at the next table. As I sat down he called, "Hey Deenie … "

I said, "Oh, hi Buddy," and I shook my hair the way Deenie in the movie did when she talked to her Bud. Then I felt my face get hot so I looked away and started to eat. But it's hard to swallow when there's somebody staring at you and I'm pretty sure Buddy Brader was staring at me all through lunch.

Three

At three o'clock I ran for the Girls' Room and so did everybody else. It was mobbed with all the kids who were going to tryouts. I didn't bother forcing my way close to the mirror. I went downstairs and when I passed the Special Class they were lining up to leave so I looked the other way. They give me a creepy feeling. I'm always scared Gena Courtney will see me and say something and I won't know what to say back.

I met Janet outside the auditorium. We waited a few minutes to make sure we wouldn't be the first ones going in. Then we walked down the aisle and found two seats in the middle of the fourth row.

The three judges were already there: Mrs. Rappoport, Mr. Delfone and Mrs. Anderson. Mrs. Rappoport is the girls' gym teacher. She really likes us—you can tell by the way she talks—she never raises her voice. And she doesn't make a big thing out of how clean our sneakers are either.

Mr. Delfone is the boys' gym teacher and Mrs. Anderson is the vice-principal of our school. As far as I know her only job is deciding what to do with kids who are discipline problems because if you make trouble you get sent to Mrs. Anderson's office and sometimes you have to sit on the bench outside for a long time.

At three-fifteen Mrs. Rappoport stood up and said, "We're ready to begin now. Remember, girls, we'd love to choose every one of you but we can only pick one seventh grader, two eighth graders and three girls from ninth grade, so if you don't make it, don't feel too badly. There are so many other activities at Adams Junior High."

Me and Janet squeezed hands. Hers felt cold and clammy. I pressed my legs tight together hoping I wouldn't get so nervous that I'd have to leave to go to the bathroom.

Mrs. Rappoport said, "We're going to call on you alphabetically and you can each do one cheer. After this round we'll decide on fifteen finalists."

I looked around the auditorium. That mean most of us wouldn't even make the finals.

The first girl called was Alice Applebaum, a ninth grader. She went up onto the stage and did the same cheer I was going to do, spelling out the school name, first very slow, then faster, and finally very fast, with a big jump and a
Yea Team
at the end. She was really good and I was sure she would make it.

Four other girls went before Mrs. Rappoport called, "Wilmadeene Fenner." I stood up thinking this was almost as bad as at the modeling agency. Janet whispered, "Good luck, Deenie," and we squeezed hands again.

I ran to the front of the auditorium because that's what Alice Applebaum did and I figured she knew the ropes. I went up the stairs and out onto the stage. I didn't look at the judges or the other girls because I knew if I did I'd never be able to go through with it. I just stood there clearing my throat like an idiot and then I began.

 

A … D … A … M … S
A. D. A. M. S
ADAMS
Adams Adams
Junior High
Yea Team!

 

I jumped as high as I could but my head didn't come close to touching my feet like Alice Applebaum's did. Still, I thought I'd done okay and when I passed Susan Minton on the way back to my seat she whispered, "You were great, Deenie." For once I was glad she thought so.

About forty minutes later Mrs. Rappoport announced the fifteen finalists and Janet made it but I didn't. I pretended I was really happy for her. We hugged and everything before she said, "I was sure it would be you, Deenie."

I couldn't even answer her because I knew if I did I'd start crying so I just shook my head and tried to smile. I sat there all through the finals, not wanting to, but what would Janet think if I walked out on her?

I was hoping that Janet wouldn't make it. I wanted the other seventh grader who made the finals to win. Then me and Janet could be unhappy together.

But when Mrs. Rappoport announced the judges' decision Janet was the seventh grader they picked and I had to act like I was really happy for her all over again.

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