Deep Blue (The Mermaid Chronicles Book 1) (3 page)

“Seven years after his first encounter he accidentally ended here. He was far from civilization, half-starved, and ready to give up on life if he couldn’t find his mystery woman.” He paused for effect but Alice only returned to her drink.

“On that night, under a full moon, she appeared to him again. She poured fresh water on his parched lips and she lay with him again. The next morning he awoke to find himself under shelter, with a large plate of food, and a map that would lead him back to civilization as he knew it. He had thought her a dream again but this time he had absolute proof. The hairnet that he always carried with him was gone.”

“He screamed at the sea then, crying for her to return. If she dared keep him alive, than she should also give him her love. He didn’t want to live life without her. He screamed until he was exhausted and then made up his mind. He would never leave that shore again. So he spent his entire fortune building his mansion here, and the town sprung up around it. In the ‘50s this place was really popular with tourists hoping to find the mysterious woman who stole the eligible bachelor’s heart away. Or perhaps trying to win the bachelor’s heart for themselves, but he never took another woman into his bed."

Alice had finished yet another drink but this time she made no move to refill it, she was waiting, waiting for the end of his story. He didn’t dare let himself smile. 

             
"As Matthew Caraway lie on his deathbed in the mansion, a young woman appeared from out of the blue. The girl walked in, and Matthew lay his fading eyes upon her. She walked to his bed, and took his hand. He looked at her and smiled. She wore a tattered dress, and a hairnet, made from sea grass and pearls. His dying wish was that the mansion and the town would pass to this young mystery woman. He died shortly thereafter. Cara took his last name, and many believed her to be Matthew’s illegitimate daughter from the only woman he ever loved. Cara passed away and her sons, Finn and Tom, are the caretakers of the mansion now, and the technical owners of the town, although no one has seen Tom in years. Finn comes back every so often.”

             
"What happened to his daughter? To Cara?"

             
"When Finn was young, starting his career, in music and modeling, his mother died in a tragic boating accident. The town was heartbroken. A nanny showed up from out of town and took care of Finn and his brother as long as they needed it. The town hasn't been the same since."

             
"Cara sounds like an important lady."

             
The doctor nodded, "Her and her husband both,"

             
"What happened to her husband?"

             
"After Cara's accident he disappeared. No one's seen him since."

             
Alice sat silent staring at the handsome doctor. She felt the press of night and the ocean breeze around her. She shivered; it was just a stupid fairy-tale but part of it rang true. Of course, those made the best stories, the ones that wound their lies around the truth.

             
"Do people show up out of nowhere, then disappear often around here?" He laughed. It was a friendly laugh, but it startled her all the same.

             
"Maybe so often we've become used to it." He said, still chuckling. The laughter made Alice uneasy. He looked at her, contemplating her. She was quite drunk. He held out his white coat, “You look cold.”

She stared at it, as if it might attack her, but the breeze running through her hair was chilly. She took it carefully, avoiding his touch; he let her have it easily, not wanting to frighten her. She threw the coat carefully over her shoulders.

“Come on, I’ll walk you home.” Alice eyed him suspiciously, but she accepted. They walked in silence, her keeping enough distance from him as she could. Nothing disturbed them but the sounds of the ocean far below. He walked her to the little cottage he used to own. It was a sweet little house nestled in between two very large bushes, making the house seem almost as small as a toy. She left him at the gate and walked up the small crumbling path. He watched her back for a moment before turning to leave. He didn’t want anything from the girl; he was simply glad had puzzled out a little of her mystery.

Alice didn’t stop walking, she didn’t stop staring at the ground but as she put her foot on the first step of the creaking stairs she stopped, waiting for the world to stop spinning around her. “Thank you,” she mumbled.

Adam’s head whipped around in response to the thanks he barely heard. She was disappearing into the house already, but he knew he heard her right. Maybe the girl wasn’t as far gone as her parents thought she was. Maybe he had a chance of helping the family. If the others in the town could just give him a quiet season, he might be able to help someone really in need.

Everyone else was asleep when Alice stumbled over boxes still unpacked, and up into her cramped little room, the only thing clear being the single bed pressed against the wall that she quickly fell into. She slipped into her drunken dreamless sleep still in her clothes, and Adam’s white coat.

             
It was dark, it was wet, and Alice was freezing. She could smell it, she could smell the blood, she could feel the emptiness inside her. There were monsters here, in the dark and the cold. Every muscle in her body ached, she crawled to her feet and felt the wet between her thighs. She couldn’t see it but she knew there was blood there. There he was, the monster with the knife in his hand. He slashed at her and she ran, but she couldn’t get away. She was back on the ground, back in the filth and the wet, she couldn’t get up, she tried to scream but no sound came from her mouth, and her grandmother stared at her with those empty, empty eyes.

Alice opened her eyes. The empty eyes of the dream were her own. It was a dream she was so familiar with, she didn’t cry anymore, she didn’t do anything but mechanically crawl from bed, and reach for her clothes. She pulled them on and walked downstairs where David was waiting.

“Mom, I’m 17! I’m not a child anymore!”

Sarah sighed as she cleaned the dishes from the table; she didn’t even look at Alice as she entered the room. The plans were in the works. Ron was looking for the right place, but the decision was made: they would send Alice away to a hospital. Neither parent was happy about it, and David least of all. He had figured it out. He stared at his sister with pity. He didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t bring her out of her darkness anymore than anyone else could.

“Let’s go.” Alice mumbled, grabbing her purse. David grudgingly obliged. Alice walked David to school as she had for the past week. The school was small and David hated it. He hadn’t made a single friend, and having his despondent sister walk him to school every morning didn’t help much. Other kids laughed at him. He didn’t have anything in common with anyone: they spent their days off barbequing, running, surfing, and doing other sports, while David spent his days off on his computer in the air conditioning.

David knew that, even when Alice was gone, he would be stuck in this town, and he resented her for it. He wanted to slap her, to make her realize they were going to send her away, but it wouldn’t have made a difference. He missed their larger house in Portland. Even his grandma's house in L.A. would have been better, even though it always smelled funny. Anywhere was better than Brassila Cove. The people here were Neanderthals to David. The most exciting part of their days was probably going out with BB guns and shooting cats. 

A month in this town, and the only thing interesting that had happened was Alice had gone out looking for a job. Granted, she spent all her money at the bar after getting her first paycheck, but it was mildly encouraging for two days. Being out in the sun hadn’t changed her, though, and working at the small surf shop where she saw people every day didn’t help, either.

Ronald had wondered if he had gone too far when he offered half-off dental work to anyone who would employ his daughter. Ted Grand had taken him up on the offer and Alice had started part-time at the local surf shop. They sold bathing suits and surf boards, and even offered surfing and sailing lessons. It didn’t matter anymore. Alice was the same person that her parents didn’t recognize. Every day, Alice woke up, got dressed
, walked
with
her brother to school
as she used to in the old days
,
went to work, then went to the bar. The worst was the weekends when she slept late, finally got up and performed some chores around the house, then headed to the bar.

Adam hadn’t had the chance to see her much. The Caraway clan kept him busy sewing up fresh wounds, and having medical emergencies down at the mansion. So while the Baileys watched their daughter slowly kill herself, the world kept turning.

The only difference about today was Ted Grand had her stay late doing inventory. The shop was dark and the streets were empty when she walked out into the brisk night. It was sharp, with a breeze that assaulted her face with the salty air off the ocean. Her nostrils flared at the scent of the salt. The town was so quiet this night. She looked up at the sky. It looked like there was a storm rolling in, but the full moon was shining, leaving plenty of light to walk home by.

She took a deep breath. The smell was getting to her here. Every time she breathed in, memories from her former life tried to creep into her consciousness. She didn’t want them: they gave her a false sense of security. Security didn’t exist. Whenever she felt comfortable, something always changed for the worse. She had learned that lesson hard.

She could see the lights of the bar from the shop, and she stopped and stared as she finished locking the doors. She knew her parents were going to send her away. They didn’t have to tell her: it was in the way her mother wouldn’t look at her, the way her father stayed at work as much as he could, the way David stared at her with those pleading puppy eyes.

She couldn’t be the person they wanted her to be. She was fragile, and she was powerless. The wind caught her hair and swept it toward the ocean. She looked down at the coast she had been avoiding all this time.

Why?
She wondered to herself.
Why should I avoid the ocean?
Nothing mattered now. Soon her parents would send her to a padded cell where nothing would change. The doctors would try to talk to her, pretend they understood, and then put her on drugs.

She thought of the story Adam had told her on that night several months ago and looked up at the full moon again. Her feet began to move, and before she knew it she was standing on the unkempt, rocky shore of the beach.
The angry wav
es were curling around her feet;
it was cold and it was refreshing. She closed her eyes
, turning her face up toward
the moon. Another person would have thought the night was magical, but Alice felt nothing.

Tears rolled down her face.  The water circled her knees, her ill-fitting khakis soaked.

“Once upon a time I was a great swimmer, and I found peace whenever I was in the water,” she whispered to the night. The wind picked up in response, as if it was urging her forward. She closed her eyes, feeling the water caressing her calves. The waters were choppy here, but she knew it wouldn’t be a problem for a strong swimmer like her. She looked out at the water. She wanted to feel it embrace her again. She had always felt safe in the water. The water was the one place she knew what to do.

She began to strip off her clothes already soaked from the spray off the waves. In the moonlight, anyone looking could have seen the contours of her body. Her skin was so pale from being indoors that she almost glowed in the moonlight. During the day, she purposefully wore mostly men’s clothes, baggy t-shirts and cargo pants. She didn't care. She didn't want to be pretty. Beauty was a curse; it was how she landed in so much trouble. But here, in the dark, she didn’t have to hide her body. The moon lit up the fading marks across her stomach and the massive scar across her right side, just below the ribcage, where once she had felt the sting of a blade. It didn’t matter; all of that would disappear in the water and the only creatures that would see would be the fish.

             
She moved into the water, her clothes left in a pile on the beach. She thrilled as the water swirled around her midsection, hiding her scars beneath the waves. With one more deep breath, she was in. Alice was swimming, reliving the good memories of being in water. She even managed a sad little smile. When Alice smiled, all the beauty she hid became painfully visible. With this smile you wanted to weep for days. You could see the trauma she failed to hide deep within. The water was cold beneath the surface. Her breaths were sharp and her eyes wide.

             
Right after it all happened, when she came home from her grandmother’s, her parents had sent her to several psychiatrists. It had been a waste of money. Every session she had, she sat there, immovable. She wouldn't speak a word. She had never spoken to anyone about what had happened to her. It was probably a psychiatrist that had suggested that they move to Australia. Alice didn't care. It hadn’t done her parents any good, and she only let the water embrace her now as a farewell to it. They would keep her locked away forever, she knew; the things she had seen weren’t something you could just get over. Eventually, maybe she would be able to hold a job and live on her own, but it would only ever be going through the motions. It didn’t matter.

She let the water lift her and set her down, let the waves carry her further and further from shore, let the water wash away some of her memories. For a few moments she felt happiness, so far from the shore that she was also far from the pain she carried on her shoulders. For mere moments, the scars that went deeper than her skin were soothed. Alice owned the surface of the ocean, she pierced waves and took her quick breaths of air. She was safe here, far from the people who wanted her to be something she wasn’t anymore. She could stay out here forever, just let the water carry her away to some distant shore where maybe she could start a life away from everyone she knew, by herself.

She hadn’t gone swimming in a long time. She was tired. She didn’t want to go back to the shore but she knew she had better. She stopped treading water for a moment, staring at the distant shore. She took a deep breath of the air and began her swim back.

A sudden twinge screamed up her leg, a painful spasm. The pain ran through her, making her yelp a mouth full of salt-water. For a moment she panicked. She stole a glance at the shore, but it was far away still. She was alone; even the moon had hidden itself behind the clouds. She tried to force her cramped leg to behave the way it should but it wouldn’t. It had been too long since she had gone swimming, and now she was caught. It had happened in seconds, and she knew it was the end. She had made the mistake of feeling comfortable for one second. The water began to pull her under, embracing her, holding her tightly the way Greg once had, forcing her against her will.

             
It was too dark. She surfaced again, coughing and sputtering. She couldn't see under the water, but it wasn’t just the water. Something had wrapped around her leg, but she couldn't see what had her caught, and couldn't get away. She couldn’t see the shore, she couldn’t see any lights. She screamed again only to swallow more salt water. There was no one there anyway; no one would hear her scream, too far. Tears fell down her face. She knew this, she knew how it worked; now that she had found peace, her bad luck had found her. She couldn't dislodge her foot. She couldn't get away. She felt a second cramp crawling up her other leg. She went under again, closing her eyes.

             
This is it,
she thought.
This time it has me.
She was resigned to it.
It’s better this way. It will be easier for everyone. No one will have to send me away. They will mourn me and then they will move on, and I won’t have to.
She let go, she was sinking. Shutting out the sounds was easy, there was nothing but the smell of fish and saltwater. No light, it was appropriate. All she had to do was let go, let her darkness take her away from everything.

Suddenly, she felt something slimy against her leg, like a huge fish but accompanied by an electric shock. Her eyes shot open but she saw nothing. Blinking the salt water away, she realized she was also blinking away strange pus, and it burned. It could have been anything: shark, octopus, any sea creature that haunted the night. It didn’t matter.
Just let me die in peace,
she thought.

The next thing she saw was the last thing she expected. Her view through the water was becoming clearer, and there was electricity running through her. It itched, it hurt, it burned, and here she was face to face with the irritated, stylish blond from the diner, the man she knew now as Finn Caraway.

             
His eyes were filled with anger, with outrage, as she continued to sink. Now she was struggling. Her calm of moments before wasn't even a memory. Alice was caught. She still couldn't move, she was burning, and she wanted to move now; she had to get away from him. Around his bare chest was a leather strap, that strap was designed to hold a knife. He had a knife, a knife. She watched with terror as he pulled it out. Her eyes got less blurred each time she blinked, but she didn’t want to see. Finn moved below her, out of her sight. She wanted to scream but she was far underwater. She tried to kick at him with her good leg. Then suddenly, she was free. Every time she blinked, she saw something different, as if curtains were lifting, as if she was clearing dirt from her eye. She needed air, but the surface was so far away now. Alice was not in the world she knew, not anymore. Why had she swum so far? Her mind was pulling away from her.

             
She was losing coherence, she needed air but she couldn't get up, the surface it was just so far. Finn was still there, he was staring at her like she was some kind of idiot. Faintly, she wondered why he didn't need to surface. She hadn't seen or heard him on the water. Her eyes, green like seaweed caught in sunlight, were going dark.

             
Finn moved toward her. She was still trying to move away, but she couldn't move anymore. He stared at her. All she needed to do was breathe. Her eyes were so frightened and growing darker with the instant. She didn't understand what was happening, and she was still holding her breath. Her panic was palpable to the man. He spun in the water and smacked her in the chest with his tail. He watched the bubbles as her remaining air was released from her lungs.