Degrees of Hope (31 page)

Although reluctant, James nodded.

“And I suppose that we must now decide what to tell Honoria,” Hope continued. They had all agreed to get the trial over with before telling his sister of what had happened. She would have returned immediately, which meant five to six weeks after the letter was sent. Everyone felt that it was better to let things settle down for a while, before telling the world that Honoria was alive and well.

“Yes... she's an heiress now,” James noted.

“I suppose she is, but I cannot see her wanting to remain in that house. I suppose that I should inform his estate that she is alive, at least, before they settle his fortune on someone else.”

“Does Malcolm have any other family?”

“Honoria told me that he has some cousins, but they don't speak.”

James nodded absently.

“And what about you, will you return to your theology college now?” Hope asked, wondering why the idea disappointed her.

“I hadn't given it very much thought but to be honest... well after all this, I'm not certain that I belong there anymore.”

“Of course you do! Entering the church is your dream!”

“Is it?” he asked, which Hope found rather confusing. “Besides, I took a life. Not to protect myself, or for Queen and country, but for revenge.”

“Well, you are more than welcome to stay here until you reach a decision.”

“Thank you,” he smiled. “And I know that you are well enough to start teaching at the school again but I have rather enjoyed it, so I was wondering if perhaps, I could continue to cover your teaching days?”

Teaching had been about the only thing that cheered James recently, so Hope had no problem with him continuing to cover for her. She would have suggested that James consider taking over completely, but Mary would be returning home soon and Hope couldn't give her job away.

“I have no objection, and I'm sure Mother won't either.”

“You're certain that I won't be putting anyone out?”

“Yes. To be honest, with everything that has happened recently, we are both rather behind on our designing and could use the time to catch up.”

“Thank you, for everything.” He smiled at her and Hope was surprised to feel herself blushing slightly.

Chapter Twenty Eight

Mid-August found the Beaumonts, Lucien, Martha, Hope, Gus, Bart and Charity, along with James Ashdown, standing on Liverpool docks, waiting for the Great Britain to dock. The dock was busy but not as crowded as some might imagine. More people made the journey to America than the return, so the crowds who came to see their loved ones off, were usually larger.

James was clearly nervous, pacing up and down the dock as he waited for the walkway to be secured, so that the passengers could disembark. His eyes kept being drawn to the ship in the hope of catching a glimpse of Honoria, but he couldn't spot her. She was probably queuing by the gangplank, waiting to disembark. 

Finally people began to make their way from the ship onto the dock and James kept his eyes focused on those crossing the walkway, desperate for a glimpse of Honoria. Then he spotted her.

She wasn't dressed in her usual finery, although she looked perfectly respectable. The most startling thing about her appearance though, was her smile. It broke his heart to think that he couldn't remember the last time that he had seen her looking so light and happy. He could remember her easy smile from childhood, he had just forgotten about it until now. Her companion said something and Honoria laughed. It pained James to realise that he couldn't remember the sound.

He began to make his way towards the gangplank and by the time Honoria reached the dock, he was waiting to envelop her in a large hug. He held her to him for a long time and Honoria was content to remain in his embrace.

Her companion, Mary, looked a little uncomfortable, until Martha made her way over.

“Dearest, how are you?” Martha asked.

“Very well.” Mary too looked different, and she also had a very wide and genuine smile. “I have so much to tell you, Martha.”

“Shall we move out of the way,” Lucien suggested since they were blocking the walkway slightly.

James blushed and pulled away from Honoria, escorting her to the side of the dock where they wouldn't be in anyone's way. The others made their way to the side as well.

“I'm so sorry,” James told Honoria, unable to wait until they were alone to apologise. “I didn't realise what you were trying to tell me. If I had-”

“Hush,” Honoria said, smiling. “Even if you had guessed, there was nothing that you could have done for me. Besides, I'm fine now.”

“And I can't tell you how well you look. I haven't seen you this happy in... well, a very long time.”

“I haven't been this happy in a very long time, but I must say that you challenging Malcolm to a duel was possibly the most foolish thing that you have ever done!”

“You know about that?” he sounded surprised. They had agreed not to tell her of recent events until she got home, only to tell her that Malcolm was dead.

“Yes, your exploits even made the American newspapers, you foolish man. Mary kept them from me for fear that I would worry, but she showed them to me on our return voyage. I cannot believe that you would do anything so reckless!”

Despite her harsh words, her tone was warm.

“Yes, I have been acting out of character quite a bit recently.”

“Well, I must say, it seems to suit you. You look quite relaxed.” Honoria smiled.

James had been feeling good recently. He had taken over Mary's position at the school full time as the other governors had commitments at present. He enjoyed teaching the children and found them to be like sponges, eager to soak up new information. Now that Mary was back though, he supposed that he was surplus to requirements and his mood slipped slightly.

Honoria's attention was then taken by Hope, then Martha, then Lucien, until she had greeted everyone in their party.

“Now, you must both be tired after your journey,” Lucien began, “so what say we stop for a spot of afternoon tea and a sit down in The Adelphi, before we catch the train back to Marchwood? I'll arrange for your luggage to be taken to the station.”

Everyone agreed with that plan and they hailed two hansom cabs to take them to the hotel.

Mary and Honoria were both staying with the Beaumonts; Honoria because they feared the memories that her house might have for her and Mary, because her mother was now living with Maggie and Martha wasn't sure that she would want to stay on her own.

Neither objected to the arrangement.

Although MacDuff's splint had come off some weeks ago, he still often held one paw in the air, having realised that it elicited much sympathy for him, which often resulted in people petting him, or offering him tidbits. Since this worked better on people who were not used to his scheme, both Mary and Honoria were greeted by the limping dog.

The first few days were a bit of a blur as everyone caught up on the others' news. Honoria and Mary wanted to know every detail of the duel and trial, Honoria because it involved her brother and Mary because she had been following the case in the papers, although they sadly left out many personal details, like how James had been coping.

The Beaumonts in turn wanted to hear all about their journey to America and how they had found the country.

Honoria and Mary seemed to have grown quite close during their trip and could often be found in conversation with each other, or taking walks together.

“I had wondered if Honoria would be a bother to you,” Martha confessed to her sister as they took tea on the fourth day of the visit.

“Oh no, quite the opposite. She was shy and quiet for a few days, I admit but she quickly came out of her shell, especially once we docked in New York. Something about being somewhere that she was unknown, seems to have given her the freedom to discover what she wants and likes.”

“I must say, you seem different as well,” Martha noted. “Happier and more confident.”

“Yes,” Mary grinned. “I think a new country had the same effect on me. Not to mention that the middle class clothes you gave me, made me feel like a new woman.”

“I'm almost sorry that you had to come back,” Martha teased, but Mary didn't smile. “So, how was your visit with mother?”

“Oh, she's fine. She says she understands why I did what I did, but Maggie wasn't nearly so forgiving.”

“Oh, I'm sorry.”

“Oh no, it's not your fault. I agreed, knowing full well what it would mean.”

“So when is she moving back into the cottage?”

“She isn't,” Mary admitted.

“She wants to stay with Maggie then?”

“She is settled, as it were.”

Martha could tell she was hiding something, telling half-truths. “Mary, what is it? What's wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong.” Mary hesitated for a moment, glanced at her sister then looked away before admitting. “I think I should like to go back.”

“Really?”

Martha didn't sound angry, so Mary gained the confidence to tell the truth.

“Honoria and I spoke about the possibility of returning before we came home, and we both felt that we might like to. We wouldn't expect you to support us, obviously-”

“Nonsense,” Martha interrupted her. “Whatever you need you shall have. I'm just trying to understand the appeal.”

“It's hard to put into words,” Mary admitted. “It's an odd country, seemingly with little of our strict etiquette by comparison. Everyone is open and friendly and the people all have such spirit, as if they believe that anything is possible. I do realise that we haven't mixed with the upper echelons of society, nor the lowest, and things could be quite different for them but something about the people is infectious. It drew us both out of our shells, made us bolder and to be honest, we both like who we are when we are there, much more than the people we are over here.”

“I'm not sure I understand?”

“Over here, I'm Jim Dawley's daughter, the working class teacher, the girl who takes care of her mother and looks likely to never marry. Honoria is Lady Ashdown, now Mrs Arundell, member of the aristocracy, expected to be polite, gentle and well mannered. Over there though, we are simply Mary and Honiara, well Mary and Helen. No one has any expectations of us, no one makes any judgements on us based on what they think they know. I feel free for the first time in my life.”

“I can understand how tempting that must be for you.” Martha smiled. “You must understand though, it is human nature to judge and once you settle in a community, they will develop expectations of you.”

“Yes, but those expectation, will be based on what we do, not who they think we are.”

Martha felt tears prick her eyes and she reached out and took Mary's hand. Of all her siblings, Mary was the one who was most like her, the only one who had actually wanted an education and to improve her station in life. The thought of losing the only sister that she felt close to, especially when she had only just got her back, was painful.

“And Honoria feels the same way, you say?”

“I believe so. Especially once she realised that details of her marriage had been told in court. She doesn't want to be seen as the abused wife of a tradesman. In fact, she doesn't want to be seen as anybody's wife, she would rather be her own person.”

Martha nodded, “I do understand how you must both feel and if this is what you truly want, then you have my blessing.”

“Thank you,” Mary smiled at her big sister.

“So, what will you do over there?” Martha asked as she wiped her eyes and tried to think of happier things.

“Well, we've fallen in love with Chicago, so I think we will return there. First we must find a house to rent, of course; we were still living in hotels when we got your last letter. As to something to occupy us, we have been talking of starting a catalogue.”

“A catalogue?” Martha sounded surprised.

“Yes. We realised soon after we got to America, that many people outside of the cities have a hard time getting certain things. For some people, the closest grocery shop is 50 miles away or more. Imagine how much further people on the frontier would have to travel for say, a furniture shop, or a clothes shop? The postal service however, is excellent. We thought that if we bought in a few items that people need or want, we could then post them to people who find acquiring such items difficult.”

“Aren't the Americans very self-sufficient though?”

“On the whole, very, but everyone likes a little luxury in their lives. Besides which, remote living is very difficult and many people simply don't have the time to make their own furniture or clothes. And even if they do, what about things like wool? Not everyone has the ability to turn fleece into wool, and where do women get their cotton thread and needles from? Not to mention, the material to make those clothes. And what happens if they should need a new saddle or bridle? Few people would have the skill to make such a thing. And what if they need a part for their well pump, or their watch breaks, or their shoes or boots wear out? ”

“Yes, I can see how it might be difficult to acquire such things.”