She‟d know instantly how hard he was, but what the hell? He was
perpetually hard around her. And if she hadn‟t figured it out yet, he had
more than a little clue for her.
“Did you let him fuck you tonight?”
Damn if his voice didn‟t break. Luc didn‟t want the answer to matter,
but he was way past pretending it didn‟t.
She struggled to get free, but he held firm. When she gave up, he
turned her to face him.
“Did you?” he demanded.
“You don‟t know a damn thing about me, and that question proves it.
Even if I gave you the truth, you wouldn‟t believe it. You want to hear that I
80
Shayla Black
went down on him in the bathroom, then we moved to the bedroom so he
could suck my tits while I rode him, then after a reverse cowgirl, he finished
me off from behind. That enough detail for you?”
Luc closed his eyes against the image her words painted. God, he was
going to throw up Jack Daniels everywhere.
He tightened his grip on her. “Is that the truth?”
“Wouldn‟t that make your life easier? You could quickly write me off.
Oh, fuck me first, of course. Everyone else does, right? But then you could
walk away because I‟m nothing more than a whore. Well, you know what?
Fuck you.” Alyssa elbowed him in the stomach.
Luc grunted and doubled over, clutching his middle, as he glared at
her retreating back.
“Damn it, Alyssa! I . . .”
“You what?”
What
had
he been about to say? Did it really matter? He‟d insulted her
utterly—and he still didn‟t know if he was right. He just knew that he had a
terrible fear that if he let her go upstairs and into her bedroom alone, he
might never have the chance to touch her again.
“I don‟t know,” he finally admitted.
“You‟re right!” she screamed. “You don‟t know. You don‟t know shit
about me. Did you ever think there was a woman under all this makeup and
provocative clothes who had real feelings that had nothing to do with sex?
Did you ever think that maybe I wanted you to see me as something other
than a stripper and an easy lay? That maybe you meant something to me?”
She shook her head. “Of course not.”
Alyssa sniffed, then sobbed. The sound tore through Luc‟s chest.
Jesus, he never meant to hurt her. “I‟m sorry.”
“Forget it. It doesn‟t matter anymore.”
Her words incited a panic he couldn‟t fight. “Wait! I—”
“No.” She stepped back, away from him. “Forget it. I don‟t get my car
back from Remy until Wednesday, but I‟ll have Tyler drive me around until
then. I‟ll get you a room with Homer in the morning. Shouldn‟t be too hard
since I paid him to give away your room to begin with.”
Oh, dear God. The bottom dropped out of his stomach, and he finally
understood—too late. She‟d wanted him to be with her. Spend time with
81
Shayla Black
her. See what was between them, sexually and otherwise. And he‟d treated
her with silent contempt. Like dirt. But even if he magically fell in love with
her tomorrow, she didn‟t fit into his future plans.
Luc took another long swig from the bottle. “I‟m . . . sorry.”
“I get it. In your head, we‟re from different worlds. You‟ve put me in my
place, and I won‟t overreach again.” She stiffened her spine and headed for
the stairs, then turned back to him. “For the record, Tyler‟s visit was about
the break-in at the club. At tonight‟s sweep, he thoroughly investigated the
entire upstairs. Seems that my stalker left me another knife and „love note‟
embedded in the pillow of my bedroom at the club. And this one not only
called me a whore; he said he‟d put a stop to me for good very soon.”
82
Shayla Black
A
LYSSA marched up the stairs.
One foot in front of the other. Get to
your bedroom. Shut the door
.
No damn way was she showing Luc Traverson her tears. She‟d
already given him too much power to hurt her. And he‟d used it
thoughtlessly.
“What did you say?” he demanded. A moment later, he darted up after
her and grabbed her, spinning her around to face him. “The same pervert
who broke into your car broke into your club?”
“And threatened me. No need to trouble yourself with my safety. That‟s
Tyler‟s job, which is why he came here tonight. Now, if you‟ll excuse me . .
.”
She tried to jerk free from Luc‟s grasp. His heat and musky scent were
getting to her. Those burning eyes, his tautly muscled body, were making
her weak-kneed.
Never had she thought of herself as one of those stupid women who
stayed in a destructive relationship with someone who held more contempt
for her than affection. Apparently her heart was as susceptible as anyone
else‟s.
It was a bitter pill.
“Luc, let go.”
He shook his head, took her face in his grasp. “I can‟t.”
On the shadowy landing, Alyssa saw the intent in his glittering eyes a
moment before he lowered his head. God, she wanted his kiss so badly.
Muscle, bone, blood, all strained forward to join with him. Touch him. Give
him anything he wanted.
Why did he suddenly want her?
Because he fears Tyler just had you
.
She turned away, biting the inside of her cheek against the pain of
denial. A debilitating pang settled in her chest. As his lips fell to her cheek,
tears stabbed her eyes.
83
Shayla Black
“Don‟t do this,” he begged in her ear, pulling her so tightly against him
she smelled the park‟s freshly cut grass on his clothes and the whiskey on
his breath. His touch was riddled with desperation as he wiped her tears
away. Alyssa felt herself weakening.
God, how could she want a man so badly who held her in such low
regard? She was supposed to be too smart for that game.
“You can‟t want me only because Tyler does.” She sobbed. “I‟m not a
sexual trophy in some fucking competition. Just . . . let me go.”
She tried to wriggle free, mentally flaying herself for the stupid hope
that had encouraged her to seduce Luc in the first place, to lure him close
with the silly idea that he might fall for her. He probably wanted someone
like Kimber: wholesome, with a bright future and a squeaky clean past.
Someone without a string of former lovers and a résumé in the sex trade.
If that was what he wanted in a woman, Alyssa was completely
doomed.
He cupped her cheeks and brought her face back to his.
“You‟re not a trophy to me, I swear. I know I have no right to tell you
what to do.” He brought her even closer, and even in the dark, she saw
pain contort his face. “I was jealous. So fucking jealous, it was eating me
alive. The thought that you gave him what I so desperately wanted.”
Jealous?
Maybe he cared a little bit . . .
“I offered myself to you—more than once.” The words came out like an
accusation.
“I tried to be gentlemanly. Smart. Use my restraint and not ravage and
plunder you again. I didn‟t want you to think I was a caveman or a
madman. I didn‟t want to lose control. I have a specific future in mind, and I
don‟t see how we fit together in that picture. But . . .” Pain laced his voice;
then he exhaled raggedly. “I can‟t ignore or deny what I feel anymore. I‟m
worried as hell about you, yes. I‟m terrified at the thought of this sick stalker
getting his hands on you and hurting you. I‟ll do whatever it takes to keep
you safe.”
Whatever it takes
. He sounded as though she really did matter. Yes, it
hurt to hear that she didn‟t fit into his future, but for the right here and now .
. . His words tugged at her heart, broke down the dam holding her emotions
in. She was moments from a flood of tears. “Luc—”
84
Shayla Black
“I can‟t live another moment without touching you. I need you more
than my next breath.”
Raw honesty ripped across his features as he leaned in again, thumbs
brushing her jaw. His touch, like his stare, pleaded. Alyssa didn‟t have the
will to refuse him.
She thrust her hands into his hair and pulled him to her. Their mouths
met in a rush, a gasp, a melding of lips, a moan. The tang of alcohol and
need burst across her senses. Luc threw his arms around her and lifted her
against him, as if he could suddenly make them one.
Instinct guided her to wrap her legs around him. He was there to
support her with a hand beneath her ass and another blistering kiss.
He sank deep, desire searingly evident in the way he fused their
mouths together. Nothing had ever been so intimate. He kissed as if he
wanted to savor every bit of her, memorize her. Alyssa kissed him back
with the same fervor, though she‟d memorized him long ago.
In her head she knew this embrace might not mean to Luc all it did to
her. Clearly, he wanted her—at least for now. But what did he really feel for
her? Anything?
Wasn‟t she too far gone to care?
Tomorrow would come soon enough, and with it, a load of
recriminations. But from now until dawn was purely about pleasure. About
connecting again.
Luc slanted another kiss across her mouth and stepped toward her
bedroom, every move brushing their bodies together. Alyssa sucked in a
breath at the incredible friction. He was really here. With her. She held him
closer and moaned against his throat, stringing kisses up his neck, across
his five-o‟clock-shadowed jaw, until she met his mouth again. He was
waiting, open and voracious. She melted under his onslaught.
Moments later, her world tilted; then the bed was at her back, and Luc
was above her, propped on his arms. Breathing hard, he looked down at
her through the moonlight.
“I‟ve wanted you again since the second I walked in your club.”
She met his gaze, which glowed with raw passion and truth. He meant
every word, despite what else he believed about her. Despite what he
85
Shayla Black
thought she had done with Tyler tonight. Despite the empty months since
they‟d last joined.
“Me, too,” she confessed.
In fact, she‟d yearned for Luc since waking up alone three months ago,
aching, and realizing he wasn‟t coming back.
“I‟ve missed you,” she blurted. “You probably don‟t want to hear that,
and I know you have someone else—”
“Not tonight. Right now, it‟s just us.” He stroked her hair away from her
face. “I‟ve thought about you so often . . . From the second I got you
beneath me all those months ago, you‟ve been a fever I can‟t shake.”
Not a declaration of love, but she‟d take it. He did feel
something
for
her. And honestly, she couldn‟t name her feelings for him. She‟d never had
a yearning to be in love . . . until she‟d met Luc.
“Be with me,” she whispered.
“Nothing could make me leave now.”
Luc took her mouth deeply, longing in every crush of his lips, every
swipe of his tongue.
Long minutes later, he lifted himself away to unbutton his shirt. Alyssa
caught on quickly and helped, her fingers brushing his silk-on-steel skin. He
blasted heat. In the shadows, she found the intriguing trail of hair that led
down from his navel to his cock. She remembered tracing it with her tongue
and making him moan and shiver.
She didn‟t even try to resist now. Instead, she pressed her mouth to
him, low on his abdomen.
He stiffened, then hissed. “You‟re playing with fire.”
A coy smile drifted across her mouth. “I like to burn.”
With a moan, she licked her way up his treasure trail, savoring the
spicy flavor of his skin, the hint of sweat, his utter maleness on her tongue.
So addicting.
Tensing, he thrust his hands in her hair and pressed her closer. “The
first time you did that to me, it nearly made me insane. This time, I want
you so much more. Dear God . . .”
She smiled against his stomach, then nibbled her way up toward his
chest, unfastening the rest of his shirt‟s little white buttons. Finally, she
86
Shayla Black
reached his brown nipples, small and male, already hard. She eyed them
greedily.
“Don‟t,” he warned gently. “My self-control . . . I‟m hanging on by a
thread.”
“Let it go.” She infused all her want into the whisper and backed it up
with a hot stare—just before she closed her mouth around his nipple and
sucked.
He cried out, the sound both broken and harsh.
Encouraged, Alyssa scraped his nipple gently with her teeth and
sucked it again, even as her hands made their way to the fly of his jeans.
He grabbed her wrists and leaned away. “Don‟t do that unless you
want me on top of you, inside you, in the next ten seconds. I‟m a time bomb
with a seriously short fuse.”
“I would love to have you inside me now,” she said honestly. “I‟ve
thought about you . . . Our night together was incredible. I need more of
that feeling now.”
Luc exhaled raggedly. “I don‟t want to hurt you. Last time, I was too
rough, too demanding—”
“Too perfect. Do it again.”
He stilled. Something crossed his face. Acceptance? Eagerness?
Whatever it was made her heart pound in her chest in a crazed ra ttle.