Demon Kissed (39 page)

I stared into my untouched cocoa, “It doesn’t feel like it. It feels like I have no control over anything. And how is a good person supposed to live in Hell? That’s not the way things are.”

“No? Are you sure?” she looked at me through ancient eyes. “I’ve seen some things that make me believe things aren’t as clear as you might think. I recently heard of an evil Valefar boy who saved a Martis girl, twice. Everything we know says that his actions were not possible, but that mark on your head says otherwise. Ivy, would an evil person give his life for you?”

I looked up at her. “No. And I don’t think Collin was evil. He was a slave, forced to do things he didn’t want to. When he resisted, when he refused to hand me over to Kreturus, it cost him his life.” My throat tightened as I spoke. I hadn’t spoken about Collin since the night he sacrificed himself for me.

“And what if he is still alive and waiting in the Underworld?”

My heart pounded. I couldn’t believe she was suggesting it. “You mean… what if he’s still alive? He couldn’t have survived that fall.
And if he did…
” I closed my eyes. There was no way he survived the beast at the bottom, if the fall didn’t kill him.
 

“If he did, you have a good boy in an evil place. You see what I mean? Things aren’t so simple. You for instance, people will say you are evil because you have demon blood coursing through your veins. But, I know you to be a good person. Some may say Collin was a Valefar and evil. But, you also told me that you were bonded to him. There is only one way for that to occur. You both have a bit of the other’s soul. You both performed the selfless act of saving the other by giving a piece of yourself. Selflessness is not evil.” She sighed heavily. “Ivy, what I’m trying to tell you is that your destiny may not change, but the path that takes you there has not yet formed. I suspect your heart will pave your path, and take you where need to go.”

I heard every word she said, but I fixated on one thing. She thought Collin may be alive. “He can’t be alive, Al. I saw the pit. You don’t need to sugarcoat things for me. I know I won’t see him again.”

“I don’t know,” she answered. “When Shannon comes in, ask her about the pit. Ask her what she thinks.”

I shook my head. Shannon was very logical. Her answer would be obvious. “I know what she’ll think. She’ll tell me it’s not possible.”

“What’s not possible?” Shannon dropped her book bag on the floor. She grabbed a bag full of Oreos and a cup of milk. She was still wearing her school uniform. I looked at her, not wanting to say it. My palms were slick. I wanted to ask her. The uncertainty of his death was making me nuts. It was like he disappeared, but I knew better. He was dead. My eyes saw him fall. There was no way he survived. A breath caught in my throat. I couldn’t say it. I couldn’t hope it.

“Do you think Collin could be alive?” Al blurted out.

Shannon straddled a chair, and pulled the Oreos and a glass of milk in front of her. “Well, it
is
possible. The pit allows things in, but it doesn’t let them out.”

“What do you mean?” My voice shook.

Shannon looked at Al, as if to ask permission to speak of such things to me. Al nodded and Shannon continued, “The sides were black slime and spikes—I know they looked bad. But the story about the pit says that it was made to hold that thing—Kreturus. He had to get down there somehow—without dying. So, it
is
possible.”

That was the logic I dreaded.
Right there.
Uncertainty made me restless. It stole the sense of control that I so desperately needed. The clock ticked in the room. For a while it was the only sound I could hear. I stared, seeing nothing, dropping the cookie, floating it in my cocoa. I wished I knew for sure what happened to him. Jagged rocks were bad. But add the big demon at the bottom of the pit as a factor, and there was no hope. Holding out false hope almost destroyed me before. I kept waiting for Apryl to come home, but she never came. This felt so similar. I just couldn’t believe it.

“Being a Seyer sucks,” I stood and dumped the rest of my cocoa in the sink.

“And why’s that?” Al asked.

“I can’t see the one thing I want to see. I just want to know for sure.” I leaned against the counter and looked at Al. “I didn’t get to say goodbye to him either. I wish I told him… anything. The last words I said to him were something along the lines of
you suck
. I didn’t believe what he said.” I grimaced, trying to hold back tears. I could cry later. “I didn’t know what he was doing. He hid it from me. Even with the bond. It was easier to believe the lies.”

Al answered, “Seyers don’t get to see what they want. Or what they wish. It’s a blessing and a curse. And you’re not just a Seyer. It’s time someone told you that.”

I nodded. “You told me that before. That I had a little of all three.”

“Yup, I did,” Al said, as she cracked her arthritic knuckles. “But it’s more than that. You have strong traits of all three types of Martis. You healed someone who was half dead. Add to the fact that his soul was almost non-existent, and the tiny piece you found was covered in centuries of evil, and it’s amazing that you healed him at all. But you did. You are a powerful healer.” My heart sank. I didn’t want to hear this. It didn’t matter now. “And then during the battle—I watched you fight the Valefar. You hesitated at first, but then you became luminescent as you cut down anything in your way. And I know the demon kiss haunts you. You managed to attack while hearing the Martis cry out around you. Nothing distracted you. You fought like a great warrior.”

“No, I didn’t. I hesitated, because,” I took a deep breath knowing my next words would sound insane. “I didn’t want to kill them. They’re slaves, Al. They have no choice. Every power they were given is laced with pain. Even their conversions—their demon kisses—were scarring on so many levels. No part of them remained unscathed. The demons stole their lives. They got an eternity of servitude with never ending agony. I didn’t want to kill them.”

The room was so silent I could hear Shannon and Al breathing. I swallowed hard, not looking at either of them. Al finally said, “Ivy, you see things we can’t. It’s who you are. There’s never been one like you before. Just be careful that your anger doesn’t get a hold of you again. I can sense it beneath your sadness.”

I hung my head. “I’m fine. It’s just… too much happened too fast. My life was ripped out of my hands, and people that I trusted turned on me.”

“I know who you’re talking about,” she said. “Eric didn’t do what they told you. I don’t know why he didn’t correct you, when you repeated it to him.”

“No,” I shook my head, “He killed Apryl. He said so.”

Al answered, “I know what he said. I also know he didn’t do it. I saw who killed her, and it wasn’t him.”

Shannon leaned forward, asking, “You saw it? Who was it?”

“I don’t know,” Al answered. “I haven’t seen the person before. I’m sorry, but I don’t know. I just know it wasn’t Eric.”

I pushed my hair out of my face and let out a whoosh of air. “Where is he?”

Shannon spewed cookie, saying, “Julia assigned him somewhere awful for disobeying her.”

“But he saved everyone… He had to help me to close the pit. Without him, we would have died.” What the hell was wrong with her? I couldn’t believe she would punish him for saving everyone.

“Doesn’t matter,” Shan patted the crumbs from her lips, “She doesn’t do things that way.”

“What way?” I asked.
“The sane way?
How hard is it to notice his disobedience saved her? Is that the way Martis are thanked? What is wrong with that woman?” My shoulders slumped as I deflated. I didn’t understand Julia. I didn’t want to either. I asked, “Well, how do I find him?”

“Through Julia,” Al said.

“Figures,” I huffed. “And she’s in Italy. Swell.”

“I’m going,” Shannon licked the cream off her fingers, “You should come.”

I blinked at her. “Why are you going to Italy?”

“To report the prophecy stuff.
I witnessed it and was one of the only Dyconisi there. You should come. You can hunt down Eric. You can also find out what happened to your sister.” Al shot her a look.
“If you wanted.”

I looked at Al. “What aren’t you telling me? Does Eric know what happened to Apryl? Did you see something?”

Al shook her head. “I didn’t see anything that would help. Just faces. And I don’t know what Eric knows. Sometimes that boy says nothing, trying to get around the lying thing that binds us to tell the truth.” She leaned back in her chair, “I suspect he knows more than he said.”

Thoughts spun in my head so fast, I felt like I was going to hurl. Giddy excitement that Collin might be alive was trying to rise to the surface, but I couldn’t let it. That was too much. I couldn’t bear it. I didn’t know what to do.
Or what to think.

The vision pulled me in quickly, before I could put my head down. I felt the rush of air against my skin, but not the impact of the table.

Black mist swirled around me. When it cleared, I was surrounded in inky darkness. But, this black was weird. I couldn’t see anything, despite my enhanced vision. I started to panic, wondering what happened. I heard nothing, and saw nothing. Goose bumps rose on my arms. It felt like I was trapped in a coffin, and I almost screamed. But just then—I felt something. A silky thread of the bond licked my stomach.

No. It couldn’t be
.

I repressed what I thought was a lie, but it wouldn’t obey me. The sensation became stronger and I knew it was
him
. Collin was near. I was afraid to call out, not knowing where I was, and unable to see through the darkness.
Collin?
I silently asked, not expecting anything back. My mind and my senses were at war. My brain was still denying the possibility, but my senses had accepted reality.

Collin’s panicked voice reached my mind.
Ivy, run. Get out of here now
!

But, I wasn’t really here, so I didn’t know why I had to run? I didn’t try to wake up. I wanted to find him. A voice in the darkness wasn’t enough. I had to see him. Suddenly I felt something, and I could see again. The darkness became thick, as the air dripped with moisture. Flaming eyes, the size of ovens, appeared before me. When the creature opened its mouth to speak, I thought I’d die, the smell was putrid. “Come to me, Ivy Taylor,” his voice gurgled like he was choking on rocks. “Let me reclaim what’s mine.”

I started to walk toward him. He couldn’t hurt me. This was a vision. The room felt colder and colder. I stepped nearer and nearer to the demon. “You’re Kreturus?”

“I am,” it gurgled. As I got closer, I could see faintly. The creature was huge. It spread from one end of the cave to the other. I looked around and noticed it wasn’t a cave. I was standing in a pit. Suddenly, the bond raged within me. It wrapped around my core and started to jerk me back into the darkness.

Collin cried out, “You can’t have her!” The demon made a horrifying sound. My heart pounded in my chest when I saw that I was right in front of it. I pushed myself away, retreating back into the thick mist, and back into the darkness. The bond pushed me hard, one final time. Then, I woke from the vision sucking in air. My body was ice cold.

“He’s alive,” the words flew out of my mouth as I sat up. My heart hammered. “And he’s with that
thing
.”

Al put her hand on my back to steady me. “Tell me what you saw.”
 

I told them everything. No one spoke when I was done. Staring into space, I said, “I know he’s there.”

Al breathed in a shocked breath. “Kreturus almost took you,” she stuttered. “You stopped breathing.”

“You went white Ivy.
And cold.”
Shannon sat next to me. Her eyes were wide.

Slightly stunned, I looked at them. I felt it in the vision. It made sense now. “I felt it—the cold, the demon, and the deformed bond. It was weird. I went right up to the demon. I’ve never been seen in a vision before. How did it see me? It can’t kill me in a vision, can it?”