Denial (Goblin's Kiss Series Book One) (29 page)

The deer in the
headlights look came as fast as her next words did.
“That
’
s not what I said at all. No one told me that everything
depended on me. How could it? I just said I
’
d take it all back and go
back to normal, whatever that may be. I don
’
t want anyone
hurt.”

“Then don
’t leave
us,
” Trigger practically begged stepping
closer to her than I liked, but what could I do if she
didn
’
t want me.

She looked to
me. “
I
don’
t want to make it worse. I just
don
’
t want to live the rest of my life in this cabin with three
guys and well...a girl. I want a life where I go to school, get
married, have children. You know, normal.”

“But
you
’
re not normal. You were never meant for normal,” Wicker
started the begging now.

Guessing I
wasn
’
t the only one aware of her next decision, I spoke
up.

“I need to talk to Emma alone. You
two can check the perimeter again and come back in
fifteen.”

“But we
—

I slammed my
fist on the small kitchen counter, “
AGAIN!
”

Wicker sighed,
grunted, and mouthed words I shouldn
’
t repeat.

Once alone I asked her to join me
on the sofa and if she wanted a drink. She hesitated looking
straight forward, but I caught her quick glances at my fists. She
knew I was stalling.

Emma said yes
luckily and found a spot on the far corner where she tucked her
feet up under her legs like a wounded animal. I
’
d screwed up
again.

I pop the top on
two sodas and we both watched and listened to the fizz settle
before she asked, “Why am I so important that I
can
’t just
leave?
”

Perhaps she was
just scared. If it had been me, I would be. Maybe
I
’
m
overestimating her confidence.

“I think if you shun the king he
will let you step down from your position. I realize all this is
overwhelming and that maybe I have put too much pressure on
you.”

“Ya think!”

I kept on over
her sarcasm, “You will not have to stay at the cabin indefinitely,
but life would be easier if we did. It was selfish of me to assume
so. I don
’
t wish a life of servitude upon anyone and I know
that
’
s what you are destined to if you go with him. I think you
deserve better than that.”

Her mouth opened to interject
something and I cut her off. “I also think that you are wrong in
your assessment for what you want. I watched you at that human
school and you were in no way comfortable with your abilities
around them. I understand that you want “normal” by what you define
it, but normal is what you make it. You could spend a lifetime in
the house you grew up in and never once feel normal.”

I understand this well.

She picked at her shoe. “You speak
like its experience.”

“It is. I lost my father when I
was very young and my brother brought me up.”

I could tell her
some things about myself and feel like I was being honest with her.
I just didn
’
t want to see her hate what I
was. I hated her existence for the longest. Now, I
can
’
t feel anything but how much I care that she is happy.
Content with the life she was given.

“I
’
m sorry that happened to you. I don
’
t wish that upon anyone
either.”

Her softer words spoke to me like
it came from within her and not the surface tension she let
everyone else see.

I took the
plunge. “Do you really wish you
’
d never met...any of us?” Okay!
So I chickened out on the how she feels about me
part.

“I
didn
’
t mean that. I was just being a brat. I know how much you
have risked for me and I am thankful. I should be more thankful and
hope that you will still rally to help me. I don
’
t want to stay in this
cabin for the rest of my life, but I don
’
t want to be a wife slave
either. It doesn
’
t seem like I have many personal
choices.”

Oh, but she
does. I can protect her. I just can’t have
her
personally.

“I will take you then. He will see
it my way.”

She mumbled
under her breath something I couldn
’
t understand. Soon I would have
to tell her that our realm wasn
’
t the only one who
wanted her back
.

The night went well. We played
cards around the small table, ate chips and salsa from our
leftovers, and downed the last of the soda. BOTH twelve
packs.

I headed off to
bed first after a bathroom trip and letting Ames in next. I wanted
to be in the bed and hidden before I had to face him alone again. I
almost said things during our two private conversations today.
Like, how much I really didn
’
t want to be anywhere but with
him. No matter where that may be. My heart wanted one thing, while
my brain kept telling me I
’
m jumping into a ship of
sharks.

Either way,
I
’
m
drawn to him. He seems to care where no one else ever has. He
protects me. Refrains from yelling though he
’
s angry with me
sometimes. Aims to see this through no matter the cost I
fear.

“I know about the two of you,”
Wicker stopped me before I made it in the bedroom door giving me a
hard stare into my not so odd anymore eyes. I squeezed the doorknob
so tight the handle was loose from my anger.

“Great!” I
flushed making the quick assumptions he was leading me to. “But
there
’
s nothing to tell.”

“I can deal with
it. It
’
s not a sin. The only other hitch in the get up is that you
belong to a king.” He tilted his head like he was analyzing my eye
color again and getting nowhere.

Only one hitch, right? Other?
“What are you going to do about it?”

“Well, I can do
one of two things. I can destroy your boy by taking you away with
me where you will get married and have lots of goblin babies or...I
can help you. I don
’
t want to see Ames done
wrong.”

Going for option two would be
good!

“Your boyfriend will be none too
happy when he knows I know how you feel.” He raised his razor sharp
eyebrow at me indicating the loosened doorknob and smirked. “You
will see.”

“I never said there was anything
to know.” Anger started to rise again in me. “What do you call
help?”

“You
’
ll see.”

Ames walked up to the two of us
thumbing his lips and stopping on the same corner as before in his
same pajama pants. I straightened looking every bit the guilty
one.

His eyes darted back and forth,
“Something I am missing?”

“He seems to think...we are more
than friends.” How do you say that when we never really termed it?
I really wanted to just disappear.

As quick as lightning Ames was
covering my body and aiming a knife at his friend. Whoa! Where did
that come from?

“What did I say?” Wicker looked at
me.

“If you hurt or take hold of her
in any way, I will—

“What Ames? Kill
me. I don
’
t think it
’
s in you. Besides, if I wanted
her kidnapped or dead she would be just that so quit your heroics
and move aside. Let us figure out this huge dilemma
you
’
ve got us in so that the two of you can move on and not make
just goblin babies but rather more normal ones that one day I can
train.”

Ames dropped his mouth sideways
and down. Wicker had a way with words.

I thought maybe Ames would say
something more, but he just left and went into the bathroom again.
I left Wicker standing alone.

The night was
long after neither of us seemed to ever fall asleep. Fifty times I
tried to get the courage to say something. When my eyes finally
closed, I felt like I
’
d slept a hundred hours when my
eyelids found the sun. I was too warm. Never having woken up warm
before, it unnerved me. However, something comforted me at the same
time allowing me to succumb to a very deep sleep for which I was
also unaccustomed too. Enveloped in something strong and heavy
weighted, I instantly knew it wasn
’
t the sheet.

Cautious to move
for fear of alarming the person whom the weight had to belong too,
I wiggled just slightly to perhaps awaken him. Did he know his arm
was draped over my hip with a hand a little too close to areas I
didn
’
t know yet I
’
d want a guy to be
near?

I tried crawling like an inchworm
out of the fold of his arm when his leg crossed over and trapped my
feet to the bed. Alright now! This was getting crazy
loco.

Deciding
awakeness was my best option, I wanted to make him aware I was
indeed awake and then escape before he noticed where he rested his
appendages on my parts. My failsafe plan was to pry his fingers off
and over to his own hip, then slide out of the end of the bed and
stand next to it staring at his closed eyes. I could see it all in
my mind. It
’
s just not how it actually went
down.

Instead, his wrenching fingers
trapped my own under his concrete block hands across my stomach
while my feet just ended up entangling more into his as he woke and
stared blankly at me. His face somewhere between confusion and
realization, a light bulb went off the instant he realized where
all his body touched mine.

Trapped still like a fish in a
net, I glared at him like he was the culprit denying all the while
that I liked every second of it.

“Morning. Trying to seduce a poor
guy in his sleep?”

That did it. Arg!

I flipped him off me, a little
easier since he helped this time. His devil smile did things to my
insides, but I dismissed them easily enough and stomped two feet
away from the bed.

“What, you think
I might grab you and hold you down. Tickle the frown from your
face?” He stood on his knees and came across the bed. Lord, he
wasn
’
t wearing a shirt.

I stared like an
idiot who
’
d never seen a guy half naked. Well, I
haven
’
t much.

He looked down
smoothing his hand over his tight thoroughly well defined abs,
“What, you like? It
’
s not like I slept in a shirt
before. Why would I start?”

My mind took a nosedive as I eyed
that he did indeed have his sleep pants on. Unfortunately, his eyes
followed mine.

“I
didn
’
t think you
’
d let me go commando. Just
looking out for your best interests here.”

I frowned worse and turned away
mad that he could read me so easily. Dang girl genes. His
abrasiveness had to have come from the turn of events from the
night before. He knew I liked him and was poking fun at me
now.

He must have
felt my frustration because he apologized and said, “Look, I
didn
’
t mean to cross the line on the bed. I honestly have never
slept in a bed with a girl before so it didn
’
t faze me to fall
asleep taking up more space than I should. The night before last I
couldn
’
t sleep. So I didn
’
t mean—well, I
’
m sorry if I was
disrespectful towards you.”

I
couldn
’
t stop the smile. I
’
m the only girl
he
’
s
ever slept with. Well, you know. Anyway, my blush meter was
skyrocketing and he knew it. It made him feel more comfortable
helping us both.