Desire: #4 Brightest Kind of Darkness (24 page)

The sound of my cell phone ringing loudly jars us both into motion. I quickly open the door, then shrug into my sweater, and rush into the kitchen to grab the phone off the counter. The last thing I want is to wake Gran up.

“Hey, Mom. How’s Houdini?”

“He’s in with the vet now. The doctor thinks your Gran was right and Houdini just ate too much. But just to be safe he’s running some tests.”

“I’m glad the vet thinks Houdini’s going to be okay.”

Ethan joins me in the kitchen while my mom continues. “We’re having some coffee across the street while we wait for the test results.”

“Something is actually open?”

“Just a twenty-four-seven convenience store with a couple of booths. I imagine it’ll be an hour or so before we get back. It was really tough getting here. The roads are a mess and the storm isn’t letting up.”

“Please drive safe…and I hope you enjoy your coffee.”

“I will. I’m sorry this Christmas turned into such a disaster.” Mom sighs heavily. “But on the bright side, I might have outgrown my allergies. I haven’t sneezed once and Houdini has been laying all over me.”

At least my Mom found something positive about the evening. “Does this mean I won’t have to vacuum twice a week now?”

“Don’t even try to wiggle out of that chore, young lady. Got to go. Your father just brought our coffees.”

I want to beg her to listen if dad tries to talk to her about the past, but they seem to have struck a kind of truce for now, so I don’t bring it up. “Okay, see you soon.”

After I hang up, Ethan sets a jewelry box with a red bow on the counter. “My turn to give you your gift. Merry Christmas.”

I open the velvet lid and gasp in happiness. “It’s beautiful.” Holding the ID-style bracelet up to inspect the single angel wing, I smile when the light catches on the diamond cuts on the wing’s unique cutout design. It’s similar to filigree, but the pattern is more symmetrically angular than the twisted curls and loops I’ve seen in most filigree work.

Ethan takes the bracelet from me and lays the inch long wing across my wrist, then hooks the bracelet’s delicate chain. Lifting my arm, he presses a kiss to the underside of my wrist next to the clasp. “I haven’t been able to get that picture of you standing outside the hospital with snow in your hair out of my head. Even while you were giving me hell, you looked like an angel.”

I smile at his comment, then glance down at the bracelet. “Thank you for the beautiful gift. The wing has an unusual cutout pattern.”

Ethan nods. “It does.”

Threading my fingers with his, I turn off the kitchen light, then pull him into the living room where I turn off the lamps until the only light in the room is the colorful lights on the Christmas tree.

“I want to share something with you that I used to do as a kid. You ready?”

He kisses my knuckles. “Sure.”

I release his hand, then get down on my hands and knees to push some of the presents under the tree out of the way.

“What are you doing?” he asks, clearly baffled.

I glance at him over my shoulder. “Just help me move some of these.”

He gets down beside me and helps.

Once the presents are cleared, I smile at him. “Follow my lead.” Laying down on my back, I slide under the tree until my head and shoulders are under the branches.

Ethan joins me. Shoulder bumping me lightly, he lets out a low chuckle. “This isn’t at all what I expected. Now what?”

I clasp his hand and turn my head until I’m looking up through the branches. “When I was little, I used to lay under the Christmas tree and stare up through the branches to all the shiny bulbs, crystals, and twinkling lights and make a wish.”

Ethan’s hand squeezes mine and sincerity replaces the amusement in his tone. “What did you wish for, Nara? What was your heart’s desire when you were little?”

A tear trickles down my temple. “I wished for my dad to return.” Sniffing my emotions back, I turn my head to look at him. “What was your heart’s desire when you were little?”

“I wished for a guardian angel to watch over me so I could be as bad as I wanted to be but would always be safe.”

“Really?” I laugh. I can’t help it. “You were quite the little hellion, weren’t you?”

Ethan flashes a mischievous grin. “Looks like we both got what we wished for. Your dad is back in your life and I got a guardian angel.”

I shake my head. “Dad is here, but not with my mom.”

“I’d like to point out that the mistletoe did its job. Just not in the way we expected it to. Your parents are together right now. Don’t lose hope yet.”

“I’m not holding my breath. And I would hardly call Michael your guardian angel. He has let so much happen to you, and sadly, you can’t even talk to him.”

“I wasn’t talking about Michael.” Ethan lifts our clasped hands under the tree between us and slides the bracelet around on my wrist. “Whether you’re from the Celestial realm or not, Nara, you ground me and give me peace.” Touching the wing, he slides his finger across the shiny cutout design. “I’ll answer your question about snowflakes now. The one attribute snowflakes have over rain is their footprint. Each snowflake’s pattern is entirely unique. That’s what you are to me. My very own, unique angel.”

I stare at the angel wing. That’s what the unusual design was inside the wing. The jeweler had taken a snowflake pattern and then bent and morphed the edges into the shape of an angel’s wing. My heart just melted a little bit more, falling even deeper in love with him.

“Thank you for the thoughtful gift.” I roll onto my side and scootch closer to him. Resting my head on his shoulder, I slide my hand up his shirt and trace my fingertips along his abs. “But the last thing I feel like at the moment is angelic.”

Ethan can’t roll over under the tree like me; his shoulders are too broad, so he clasps the back of my thigh and pulls my leg over his, locking me tight against him. “I think you’re perfect just the way you are.”

“Ever made out under a Christmas tree?” I say. “We’ll have to keep it PG-13 but—”

Ethan presses his mouth hard to mine for a second, then follows with a tender kiss, murmuring against my lips, “I can’t think of a better place to create some new wishes. Tell me your heart’s desire, Sunshine.”

Chapter Sixteen

Nara

I walk to the edge of the woods, my snow boots clomping through the deep snow. A crisp breeze blows through the trees, drawing my gaze to the ripples rolling across the water in the icy pond. It’s our place.

Ethan’s and mine.

Where is he?

I scan the open field around the pond, but don’t see Ethan anywhere.

The wind blows again, lifting my hair and freezing the tips of my ears. I shudder and start to zip my jacket, but I’m not wearing one, so I wrap my arms around my body and shiver to stay warm while I move closer to the pond.

The water is perfectly still now that the breeze has stopped. Panic grips my chest as I stare at the frozen chunks of ice floating in the water. They seem larger than they were before. What if Ethan is under there and I don’t know it?

“Ethan!” I scream, terror shooting sharp pains in my stomach.

Nothing.

I call his name several more times, but all I hear is my own fear echoing back at me through the woods.

A group of ravens take off from the top of a tree. I track their movement and want to call after them, to beg them to tell me where Ethan is, but they’re gone before I can utter a word.

Wrapping my arms tight around my churning stomach, I continue to stare at the pond until my eyes burn. What if Ethan’s stuck under one of the big pieces of ice? Something moves in my periphery, and when I look up, Ethan’s standing a few feet away, watching me with a furrowed brow.

“You’re here!” I smile happily and stomp through the thick snow toward him. “I’m so relieved. I was worried you were in the water.”

He doesn’t speak. He just smirks and puts his hand out. I slip mine inside of his. As I walk along beside him, soaking up his warmth, I wonder about his subdued mood. He seems deep in thought.

He leads me along the edge of the pond, and before I can blink, my perspective changes. I shriek when I suddenly land on a thick branch high up in a massive tree. I grip a limb above my head, my whole body shaking from the fast change in location. Once I get my bearings and can breathe normally again, I peer around us. It’s surreal being up so high. We’re higher than most of the treetops, creating the illusion that I can see forever. We must be in the white oak tree. I smile at the clumps of mistletoe on branches just a few feet above us.

Ethan follows my line of sight. “Could’ve gotten that mistletoe down much easier if I’d wanted to.” While he quickly lowers himself onto the thick limb, his movements assured and graceful, his actions remind me of Drystan’s prowess and confidence on the bouncy, one-inch slackline.

Once he leans back against the tree’s trunk, Ethan holds a hand up for me to join him. I grip his hand tight and take a much longer time letting go of the limb above my head to finally lower myself to his level. Heart racing, I let him hold both my hands while I squat and turn on the limb. As soon as I straddle the thick branch like him, he pulls me back against his chest.

We sit there, staring out over the treetops. He hasn’t spoken for at least a half hour, so I just let him be at peace with his own thoughts. Something is definitely on his mind.

After a few more minutes pass, he puts his hand out in front of me, palm up. I lay my palm flat on top of his and he lowers our hands to his thigh.

“I’m not Ethan,” he finally says in a voice I’ve only heard a few times before; it’s older and wiser, like Michael’s.

“I’m dreaming right now, aren’t I?” I say, lifting my palm off his and sitting up. I knew something felt off about Ethan. The superior arrogance alone should’ve clued me in. I’m surprised by how calm I am, but I know the Corvus would never hurt me.

When he stiffens, then answers, “Yes,” I realize this is a perfect opportunity to get inside the spirit’s head and find out what happened in the past. But first I want to know who he is. If I learn more about him, it might help me better deal with Ethan when his Corvus affects his moods. I turn to look at him. “What should I call you?”

“I’m Corvus.”

I roll my eyes. “That’s your designation, your…species, not your name.”

He frowns. “Why do I need a name?”

“So I don’t address you as, ‘hey you.’”

“You’re looking at me. Of course, you’re talking to me.”

His logic is so literal and laced with stubbornness, it’s hard not to laugh, but I manage. “Have it your way.” I sigh and turn back around. “Do you know who you are?” I ask the winter-bare tree branches.

He cups my jaw, turning me to face him once more. “I don’t have a name.”

I smile inwardly. He’s thawing some. “How about Rave?”

He stares at me blankly, then appears to roll the name around in his head. “I suppose Rave works.”

“Do you know what you are, Rave?”

Pride flashes in his eyes. “I’m Corvus,” he says once more like that explains everything.

“No, you’re more than that. You’re special.”

Arrogance stamps his features. “All Corvus are special.”

I start to shake my head, to clarify, but he captures my chin between his knuckle and thumb, halting my movement. “You are unique.”

I snort. That’s the last thing I expected to hear. “Yeah, I’m a lightweight, remember? That’s pretty dang unique.”

Amusement shows on his face for the first time. He likes that I remember him calling me that in an earlier dream. “Your lightness is a gift, part of your nature. It’s incredibly rare.”

“I’m confused. Why is lightness rare?”

“I just know it’s fleeting.”

Is he remembering something from his past? “How do you know it’s fleeting?”

Rave shrugs and glances away. “Because darkness is my world.”

I tap his shoulder, and he returns his dark eyes to mine. “Does it have to be? Why can’t you have some light in your world too?”

A flash of surprise glimmers in his dark eyes. Then uncertainty. Finally he stiffens. “There is no choice.”