“Are you going to introduce us?” Alec asked, reaching to take Kara’s hand in his.
She felt dwarfed by him. A little startled.
“Yes, of course. Kara, Alec and his girlfriend, Dylan. This is Kara Crawford.”
So this was Alec. Dante’s best friend. And Dante had never thought to mention her to him, apparently. Her heart sank a little. But she tried not to show it as she shook hands with Alec, then Dylan.
“It’s nice to meet you.” Dylan smiled. She was a beautiful woman, with delicate features and translucent, pale skin.
“You two should join us.” Dante motioned at the empty booth seat across from them.
Alec nodded. “Sounds good.”
He helped Dylan off with her coat and handed her into the booth. The waitress came immediately and took their drink orders, as well as their coats. Kara couldn’t help but notice that Alec ordered for Dylan, just as Dante did for her. Dylan never batted her calm, gray eyes.
“Kara, what do you do?” Dylan asked.
“I’m an attorney. Dante and I work together at Kelleher, Landers and Tate.”
“You should never date a woman who’s as smart as you are,” Alec told Dante with a wink. “It can get you into all kinds of trouble.”
Dylan turned to grin at him. “You’re really in trouble now,” she told him, a teasing note in her voice.
“Ha!”
She raised an eyebrow at him, and he leaned in and kissed her cheek, making her beam.
The waitress brought the drinks and took their orders from the men. Something about it seemed oddly natural for them both, and again, Dylan didn’t react at all. But then, Dante had mentioned he and Alec had met at the Pleasure Dome. Which probably meant that Dylan was into the kinky stuff, too. BDSM. Kara’s cheeks heated a little. Did that mean Alec and Dylan would know that about her, too? But Dante hadn’t even mentioned her to them. She could be just another woman he was seeing.
Doesn’t matter. Just act as you normally would.
“What about you, Dylan?” Kara asked. “And Alec?”
“We’re both authors,” the other woman answered. “I write erotica and Alec writes thrillers.”
“Oh! You’re Dylan Ivory. I’ve read your books. I loved
The Art of Desire
.”
Dylan blushed. “Thank you. That’s so lovely of you to say.”
“It’s true.”
Dylan smiled warmly. Kara had a feeling she’d like this woman, given the chance to know her.
Except that these were Dante’s friends. It was unlikely she’d have the opportunity. That would be much too relationship-y for them.
Hadn’t she just told him moments earlier that she wasn’t interested in a relationship, that she wanted to keep things status quo?
Her stomach began to knot, her pulse to race. She sipped at her drink—a cup of cold sake—but it did nothing to calm her. Why was she so panicky?
“Will you all excuse me? I’ll be right back.” Dante let her out of the booth and she stood up, feeling foolish.
“I’ll go with you,” Dylan announced, getting up as well, and Kara had no option but to wait for her.
They made their way to the ladies’ room at the back of the restaurant. Once inside, Dylan put a hand on her arm.
“Are you okay, Kara?”
“What? Yes, sure.”
“I hope you don’t mind me saying so, since we’ve just met, but you seem a little pale. And flustered.”
“Oh, I’m just . . .” She shook her head. “I can’t even come up with an excuse,” she finished with a small laugh. “And now I’m horribly embarrassed.”
“Is it Dante?”
Kara shook her head, miserable. Then she had to nod. It
was
Dante. But she didn’t even know this woman. This woman who was the girlfriend of Dante’s best friend.
“Kara, I probably shouldn’t be sticking my nose in here, but I have to tell you, I have never seen Dante look at anyone the way he’s looking at you.”
“What do you mean?”
Dylan bit her lip. “Not that I’ve seen him with too many women, but we’ve run into him a few times. And he’s usually pretty reserved. But you . . . He looks at you with those big puppy dog eyes.”
“He does not.”
“He does.” Dylan’s gray eyes sparkled as a slow grin lit her face. “The guy is smitten.”
“What? Oh no, I’m sure he’s not . . . smitten.” Kara pushed a hand through her hair. “We’re just . . . dating. Sort of.”
“That
is
his usual style. But I’m sure you already know that. You . . . do know that?”
“Yes, of course. Dante has been completely open about his views on dating and relationships.”
“God, I’m sorry. I’ve said too much. It’s none of my business.”
“No, it’s fine,” Kara told her, and it was. She was being so nice to her.
Dylan smiled, leaning over the sink to wash her hands. “I have a nosy streak. I really do apologize, Kara.”
“It’s okay. And it was nice of you to come in here with me. To make sure I was okay.”
Dylan dried her hands. “I’ll get back to the table, give you a moment to yourself.”
Kara smiled at her, relieved that Dylan seemed to know instinctively that she needed to gather herself.
“Thanks.”
Dylan nodded and left.
Kara looked at her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were huge, her cheeks a little pale, still. What was wrong with her?
You’re in love with a man who will not love you back.
Her heart hammered, a hard, aching thunder in her chest.
But Dylan said he was smitten . . .
Don’t get your hopes up.
No, the higher her hopes went, the more thoroughly they’d be crushed in the end. She was not willing to risk that.
Too bad it was too late.
thirteen
Dante downshifted as he pulled over in front of Kara’s building. He didn’t know why he’d decided not to take her home with him. It wasn’t that they’d already had sex. He could never get enough of that, not with her. He could never get enough of
her
. Just being with her . . .
Maybe that was why.
He was too fascinated with her. Too obsessed. And it had really hit home sitting with Alec and Dylan, the two of them all over each other. The way they looked at each other. The way he felt watching them. Their happiness.
The way a small part of him craved that for the first time.
Time to shake it off.
“Thanks for dinner,” Kara said, gathering her coat, her briefcase.
“Sure, you’re welcome.”
“It was great meeting Alec and Dylan. They seem like nice people.”
He nodded. “They are.”
Kara sat for a moment, watching him. She bit her lip.
“Dante? Is . . . is everything all right?”
“Yes, of course. Why do you ask?” He hadn’t meant to sound so casual. So cool. Cold. But he could feel his walls going up, as if made out of solid concrete.
“I know we hadn’t planned to see each other tonight, but it’s . . .” She paused, shrugged. “Well, we usually spend the weekend together and . . . Never mind. It’s not important.” She shook her head, then turned away and reached out to open the car door.
He grabbed her hand. “Kara.”
She turned back to him. Her eyes were gleaming in the pale light from the streetlamp, a muted silver and gold. Those long eyelashes framing her wide gaze. There was confusion there. He didn’t blame her. He hadn’t given her a reason why he was dropping her off at her place on a Friday night. He wasn’t so sure himself.
“Don’t go,” he said quietly.
“What do you mean? You . . . you took me home, and I figured—”
“I know,” he interrupted. “I was . . . I don’t know what I was thinking. Come back to my place with me.”
She was biting her lip again, her teeth coming down on that plush, pink flesh. “I think . . . maybe I should stay here tonight. Maybe it was a good idea. Yes. I think it was. I could use the time to catch up on some work. I have a Monday deadline that I sort of ignored today.”
“Ah. Okay. I didn’t realize you had work to do.”
Why did he feel like an asshole?
“Okay, then.”
She sat and looked at him for another moment. He pulled her hand to his lips, kissed the back of it, making her smile. But only a little.
“I’ll call you, Kara.”
Oh yeah. He
was
an asshole.
He could see the hurt on her face. And he hated himself a little. She nodded, got out of the car.
He watched her until she’d gotten safely into her building, then sat there for a little longer.
He’d never been concerned before when he’d wanted space from a woman he was seeing. It had never been an issue. Not for him, anyway. Why now? Why Kara?
He thought back to his conversation with Alec during dinner tonight, when the women had left the table. Alec had accused him of being a goner. Dante had argued the point, of course. And, Alec being Alec, he had let it go at that, with nothing more than a raised eyebrow to drive his point home.
Alec was right.
God damn it.
He turned the engine over and pulled onto the street, gunned it a little too hard as he swung around the corner.
This could not be happening. Not to him. He was not the relationship guy. He was not responsible enough. Obviously. Look what had happened the last time he’d let a woman down. Erin had been
killed
, for God’s sake.
He didn’t know how to do this stuff. He’d even let his own mother down. Hell, he’d spent his
life
letting his mother down. First because he hadn’t known what to do, then because he’d given up hope of ever being able to do anything.
He was a coward.
He hit the gas harder, the BMW flying over the Seattle streets.
He would not drag Kara down with him.
He got onto the 5 and drove north, heading out of the city. He needed some open country around him. Needed to think. There was a quiet little inn up by Warm Beach. How long would it take him to drive there? He could rent a room, stay for the weekend.
And do what? Brood?
He blew out a long breath.
He was being ridiculous. He was being a coward all over again.
He’d have to face Kara sooner or later. And even more, he’d have to face the fact that he had feelings for her. He wasn’t ready to give them a name. Maybe he didn’t have to. But he couldn’t run from them. Because whether Kara was with him or not, how he felt about her was still going to be there, like a warm weight in his chest that never went away.
God damn it.
He got off at the next exit and turned around, headed back into the city. He was driving too fast. It didn’t seem to matter. All that mattered was getting back to her.
He could not believe he was going through this. It wasn’t like him. He didn’t want it.
He couldn’t help it.
He cared about her. He wanted to be with her, damn it. And why shouldn’t he be? Just . . . be with her.
By the time he pulled onto her street again he was pretty worked up. He found parking right across from her building and looked up.
The lights were on in her place, so she was still awake. He tried to picture her, warm and safe inside her apartment, but realized he’d never been inside. He had no idea what her place looked like.
He always preferred to take a woman back to his place. Always. To be in control of everything, including the environment. Maybe it was time to give some of that up. A little, anyway.
And he had to see her.
Had
to.
He got out of the car just as the sky opened up. Rain pelted him as he ran across the street. Her door was next to the entrance to the deli in the old brick building. He pressed the buzzer. Silence. He rang again. Where was she?