Destination D (5 page)

Clear Exit

I
t was 3:30 p.m. and Pam had just returned from a client meeting. She stepped into the oak-paneled elevator, looked straight up at the mirrored ceiling, and smiled to herself. To her, the mirrors symbolized strength— her strength—and represented every glass ceiling she had to crash through to get to where she was today. She was so close to being a partner at Sterling, Mathis, and Silverman, one of the most prestigious firms in Atlanta, that she could taste it. And the flavor was delicious.

As the elevator reached the fiftieth floor, she inhaled deeply, closed her eyes and breathed out as a rush of adrenalin flowed through her body. The bold bronze letters spelling out the firm's name were located behind the receptionist's desk. Italian crystal chandeliers hung from the domed ceiling in the marble foyer. Chippendale furniture flanked the waiting area and several expensive paintings hung throughout the corridor, while beautiful Persian rugs warmed the dark, stained parquet floors.

“Good afternoon,” Carol Ann, the front receptionist, remarked.

Carol Ann thrived on her position as guardian of the gate. Her stance was upright and stiff and her mannerisms reflected all business. The partners often joked that they couldn't tell what she enjoyed more—her job or the “perks” that came with it.

There was no reciprocal response.

Carol Ann was used to Pam being rude. “May I get you some coffee?”

“No, I'm fine, thank you.”

“He called again,” Carol Ann said, handing her a message.

“Not again.” Pam looked at the message and quickly crumbled it up in her hand. Carol Ann looked at her sympathetically. The man had been calling this woman non-stop for the past three weeks. He was always extremely polite, but there was something about his voice that sounded desperate. Carol Ann wondered
why
she was so hell-bent on avoiding all of his calls.

“Hey, I know it's none of my business, but…”

Pam held up her hand in front of Carol Ann's face signaling her to stop. “You're right and let's keep it that way.” It was obvious that Carol Ann was privy to everything going on at the firm and made it her business to know everyone else's business.

“I didn't mean to pry…”

“Listen, Carol Ann, I realize you have your sights set on
higher
plateaus, but stick with what you do best. I realize Hugh Richmond is a senior partner, and
he
may like you showing him your professional and
personal
skills, but I prefer you keep everything totally professional with me and stay out of my
personal
affairs. Is that understood?”

“Yes, ma'am,” Carol Ann answered timidly, wishing she could crawl underneath her desk until she recovered from her stinging blow.

“Now, have you seen Amanda?” Pam asked coolly.

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I have,” she answered sheepishly, hoping this bit of news would help redeem her from the
faux pas
she had just made.

Carol Ann leaned over the front of her desk to whisper something to Pam. Her bright ruffled crimson blouse revealed just enough cleavage for Hugh to enjoy and for the firm
not
to consider it inappropriate business attire.

“Rumor has it that she's been feverishly working to finish that Johnson vs. Tyfish Systems case so she can make it home early for her daughter's graduation party, tonight. Poor thing.”

“Thanks, Carol Ann,” she replied dryly.

Pam headed back toward her office and found three stacks of papers sitting neatly on her desk. She eagerly massaged her hands together. “Well, well, well, what have we here?” she said under her breath. She closed her door partway and sat down. As she carefully sifted through each page, a slight grin came across on her face.

Unbeknownst to her, Amanda was watching her every move through the cracked door.
Just look at her salivating like a wolf that has been left with a flock of sheep! The nerve of that…

“Amanda?” Pam called out. She felt someone's eyes watching her and decided to investigate to see who was checking up on her.

Amanda paused briefly to give herself a moment to regroup. “Yes, it's me. I see you've had a chance to look over the files for Johnson vs. Tyfish.”

“Yes, I'm still reviewing them. Come on in and have a seat. How long have you been standing there?”

Amanda was getting more infuriated the longer she watched her. She thought:
Long enough to see you decide how you're going to go about taking all of the credit for all of my hard work.

“Oh, I just walked by to check to see if you were back in your office yet,” Amanda said as nicely as she could. She had changed her mind about leaving out the last few pages of her documents. If she had done that, then it would have made her as evil as Pam, and the slightest thought of ever being like that woman only repulsed her.

“Please close the door behind you and sit down.”

“All right,” Amanda complied.

“Let me start by saying that you did an excellent job in gathering the information that I requested.”

“Thank you.”

Pam pushed her chair away from her desk and carefully placed her forefinger on the side of her face while she contemplated her next sentence. Amanda began to feel uneasy and shifted her body around in her chair. She clutched her sweater tightly and casually looked down at her feet as the attorney stared at her.

“Amanda, I don't like playing games with people, so let me get right to the point. I'm
not
satisfied with the mediocre attitude you displayed today. I also think you've been slacking since you found out you would not be working with Bill McKesson on this case and would be working with me instead. I don't appreciate, nor will I tolerate, inappropriate behavior from you or anyone who works for me.”

Blocking out the sound of her voice had become an art form for Amanda. She knew that her boss would go on and on until she felt like she had pummeled Amanda's self-esteem into the ground. Amanda had gotten to the point where she could read her lips without listening to her. Sometimes, she made a game of it by starting the second hand on her watch and checking to see how many seconds it would take her to finish her insults. So far, it had been only thirty seconds, but Pam was just getting started.

“Amanda, you knew about this case several weeks ago, and today you had a hard time making a decision as to whether or not you would give me the information that I needed. In this business, things are always subject to change. We have to go with the flow whether we like it or not. Understand?”

Amanda nodded like a child who had just been reprimanded as Pam continued her rant.

“I think it's only fair to tell you that I'm going to report your insubordination to Pete and let him make the decision on how to handle this. After all, since it appears that you'd rather work for the big boys anyway, perhaps he can find you a place with one of them. Of course, I doubt very seriously that they would put up with your antics as much as I have. As a matter of fact, I know they wouldn't, and you do too, which is why I don't understand why you are not more grateful and solicitous to me.”

Amanda paused. “I'd like to say something, if you've finished.”

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I do believe I am,” she retorted arrogantly as she held her hands out and stared at her nails, debating whether or not she needed a manicure.

Amanda took a deep breath before she spoke. She didn't know exactly what she was going to say, but whatever it was, it was long overdue.

“First of all, I find it very insulting that you can sit across that desk and talk to me like I'm a nine-year-old child. I realize I was a little hesitant at first, but I did stay. It seems to me like you have forgotten about all the other times I have spent nights with you until 9:00 and 10:00 assisting you with other cases. Have you ever taken a look around you and noticed that you are the only attorney who takes twelve cases at a time? I am the only paralegal who works sixty or more hours each week.”

“I see.” Pam folded her arms deliberately across her chest and leaned back in her chair.

“Most of the attorneys around here at your level are only assigned five or six caseloads, and their paralegals work only fifty hours or so—if that! Why do you always get overloaded? Please don't misunderstand me. You are an excellent attorney, but you just take on more and more and they just keep giving it to you. You stay here all hours of the night while everyone else goes home. I've been here and listened to the other lawyers talk about you.”

Pam raised her eyebrows at Amanda's comment. “Really, now. And what are these
other
lawyers, saying?” She couldn't have cared less if she were the talk of the entire Bar Association. The bottom line was this: She was there to win cases and get paid—period!

“They say, ‘When they don't want to do something, they just turn it over to the black girl. She'll do anything. You know how
they
are. Always trying to prove something.' I've heard them over and over again, laughing at the many hours you put in. Even though you make six figures, you are still underpaid in comparison to them. They work fewer hours than you do, bill fewer hours, and still make more money. Even with all of the brains you have and the legal finesse you possess, it will never be enough for any of them to respect you.”

Pam moved forward over her desk. It took everything in her to not reach across and grab Amanda by her throat. She held back her comments in reserve and kept what was really on her mind to herself.

How stupid does she really think I am? And who in the hell does Amanda think she is, coming into my office telling me what these white boys think? I thought she was upset because she had to work late, not about the people who talk about me. Does she think I'm that naïve and don't know what they are saying behind my back? Why is she saying this now? Oh! How I wish she would just shut up and stick with what she gets paid to do around here.

“Amanda,” she said coolly.

“Please, let me finish. I know I'm sticking my neck out here.”

Pam stared at Amanda condescendingly. Amanda was right about one thing: she was stepping out of line. Way out of line.

Hmmm…what is it with her today?
Pam fumed.
All of sudden, she's gotten downright bold and saying things to me as if she doesn't expect it to have any consequence. She's confident to the point where she's borderline insubordinate. Well, good for you, Amanda—you're finally speaking up for yourself after all these years. But I'm not the one to practice your newfound identity with today or any other time. Please, go talk to someone who really gives a damn!

Pam sucked in her cheeks and bit down hard on the inside of her jaw so she wouldn't go postal on Amanda. She was no fool; she knew she needed Amanda's assistance for this case. Despite her disdain for Amanda's family issues, she was one of the best paralegals in the firm. Of course, she would never tell her that. But for now, she would hold her tongue until
after
her big trial was finished, and then after that, Amanda would be too!

Amanda talked so much that Pam's ears became numb. The pain spreading from her cheek was relentless and made her even angrier as Amanda's utterings continued to ramble.

“You have no idea how they feel about you. And then the people who try to support you, like me, working with you all of the long hours…The one time I need to leave early, and the one time I decide to put my family first and my job second because my
only
child is about to graduate from high school, you force me to work. For months you knew about this celebration. Now, because of this one instance, you decide I'm lazy. You berate me and try to make
me
feel guilty! No wonder people around here call you the evileyed tiger. You sure know how to chew 'em up and spit 'em out when you are through with them.

“And one more thing,” Amanda's voice became low and somber. “I know we made a pact that we would never discuss this.”

“I told you earlier I did not want to go down that road with you! So let's not break that pact!” Pam sneered.

Amanda started to shake. “Oh, you broke it long ago,” she said, holding back her tears. “I just never did anything about it. But, I can't and I won't be silent anymore.”

Pam abruptly stood up. Her papers flew across the desk and startled Amanda. “Damn you!” she whispered as she slowly managed to win back her composure and sat back down.

Amanda's voice quivered at first, but she managed to speak very deliberately and quietly. “Let's drop the formalities for now, okay, PAM?” Those three letters hadn't come out of her mouth in so long, she'd forgotten what it sounded like.
What happened to the person who I knew in college, huh?
Amanda thought, still fighting back her tears.

“I'm
Ms.
Madison to you in this office! Which by the way, don't think I haven't noticed how you purposefully avoid calling me that! The
Pam
that you knew in college did what she said she would do and became an attorney!” Pam struck back in her most haughtiness tone. “But, you on the other hand…”

“Yes, I got pregnant! I had an illegitimate child and couldn't finish law school like you and Dee. I couldn't hold up my end of the bargain for the three of us to become lawyers together, and you haven't let me forget it, have you? I don't know what has happened in your life that would make you become so bitter, cruel, and self righteous.”

“You are so ungrateful, Amanda! This is exactly why I didn't want you assigned to me. I'm the one that got you this damn job, remember?”

“And you have never let me forget that, either! How many times do I have to thank you? I'm not ungrateful, PAM! But, YOU certainly are!”

“It's MS. MADISON!”

“Get over yourself, okay!” Amanda yelled as Pam rolled her eyes at her audacity. “I have worked long and hard for you, and I'm one of the best paralegals this firm has—if not THE best! But, have you ever once said, ‘Good job, Amanda!' This was supposed to be a short-term assignment. I had no idea that I would end up working for you all of this time. Oh my God, if only I had known that this short-term assignment would turn into long-term hell. My God! We used to be best friends…” Amanda's voice dropped as she regained her composure and rose from her chair. “I'm done with this,” she said calmly and waved her hands in the air. She got up to smooth the wrinkles in her dress.