Devil May Care: Boxed Set (144 page)

Wes

Time moved quickly, for me at least, but it soon became clear that it was moving much slower for April. And it was also becoming clear that she was getting more and more depressed as the trip went on. There had to be something I could do to help snap her out of this funk. I hated to see her so down. If only I could take her mind off of things…and I didn’t mean by being sexual with her, which surprised me. I loved getting it on with her. I loved it when we fucked, and I thoroughly enjoyed when we had sex. The times when it was more lovemaking, okay, yeah, that frightened me, but even that was surreal and amazing.

But I didn’t just want her for her body. It was strange. I never felt like this before, but I almost felt like I couldn’t be happy if she wasn’t happy too. And, of course, I wanted her to be happy for her own sake, not for mine.

All night long, I wracked my brain to figure out what I could do while we were stuck out here on the youth mission trip, because I wasn’t about to wait until we returned to that Hell of a house to try to lift her spirits. If being away from that dump alone wasn’t enough to make her happy, then returning to it sure wouldn’t help any.

Obviously, I didn’t get a lot of sleep, so I seized a blanket and sneaked out of the guys’ cabin. It wasn’t easy, tiptoeing in the darkness, making sure not to wake anyone, but I managed, and I hurried next door to the girls’ cabin. It took a moment for my eyes to adjust to the darkness. It wasn’t morning yet. Moving just as quietly as before, I made my way to her, and when I reached her bed, I shook her gently awake. She jerked and stared at me, confusion in her eyes.

I put a finger to my lips and then grabbed her hand. She came willingly, and we left the small cabin behind. Earlier, I had spied a nearby mountain trail and, maintaining my silence, I guided us toward it. We walked up in silence. It wasn’t that I didn’t have anything to say to her. There were so many things we could talk about, some important, some silly, some to tease her, some to, I didn’t know, maybe be sweet. But the silence was nice. I didn’t feel the need to fill it with emptiness. It was already full. It was enough to just be with her, this early in the day, when the world hadn’t come to life yet.

“What are we doing?” she asked, and I almost winced at her ruining the moment.

“You’ll see. It’s a surprise.” I grinned at her.

Her eyes narrowed. “There isn’t a car hidden somewhere or a bike, is there?”

Did she want to run away with me? Or not?

“Your first guess is wrong,” I said lightly. “Only two more, but if you get ’em both wrong, we’re gonna turn around and go back to our beds.”

“Then I just won’t bother to guess.” She brushed her hair back. Even though her hair was a little wild and she wasn’t wearing any makeup, she was still so pretty. She wasn’t like other girls, and I didn’t mean just because of her looks. There was something wholesome and sweet about her that made me want to protect and shelter her, but there was also fire and desire, and that side I wanted to feed and nurture and grow.

When we reached the top, I laid the blanket down and sat on it. April sat beside me, her head on my shoulder, but since the sun hadn’t made an appearance yet, it was chilly out, and I had no reason to complain when she got up and curled up into my lap. My arms encircled her automatically, and I just held her like this, marveling at how perfectly she fit into my arms. All of our problems and obligations felt like they were miles and miles and miles away, and in our own little world, it was so tempting to open up, to tell her anything and everything, to give and to take.

“You brought me up here to see the sunrise?” she asked.

I couldn’t see her face with her turned toward the sun, so I couldn’t gauge her reaction. “Yeah,” I said. “What? You thought I couldn’t be romantic?”

“It’s not that.” She shifted around slightly and touched my cheek. “It’s the best surprise I’ve ever had.”

I brought up my hand to cup hers. “I wouldn’t mind doing this a few hundred more times with you.”

“You aren’t as much of a bad boy as I thought,” she murmured.

“No?” I grinned recklessly. “Are you sure about that?” I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively.

“You’re good,” she continued with a broad grin. “At…a lot of things.”

I laughed.

She knocked into me. “I don’t just mean with your mouth or your tongue or your… You are smart, in your own way.”

“Hey. That doesn’t sound like a compliment.”

“I’m sorry! You’re great with cars. You have a passion for it. You know what you want to do with your life, and I respect that. And I think it’s wonderful that you know what you want out of life. Sometimes…”

No. I didn’t want her to think down that road.

“Sometimes I think you know too much. You’re too good at things. All the things,” I said.

“All the things?”

“Yes. Like blinking and breathing. You do a good job chewing your food too,” I teased. “But you also do good things to me. You make me think that I can rise above my circumstances, like my past doesn’t have to define me. You aren’t just a pretty girl. You’re more than that.”

“I’m just pretty?”

“Fishing for compliments?” I shook his head.

“I’m not nearly as pretty as that.” She snuggled against me and pointed to the sunrise. It was a majestic sight, the sky changing colors, reds and yellows and oranges all splashed around like a painter had used broad strokes.

“Not nearly. You’re prettier.”

She squirmed. “Am I?”

“Didn’t your parents ever tell you that growing up?”

“My mom did, but all moms think their daughters are pretty.” She shrugged. “And, Dad…well, he didn’t want me to become vain. He didn’t let me get my ears pierced until I was sixteen. Sixteen for wearing makeup too.”

Again, I’d let the conversation go off course. We wouldn’t have a ton of time before we had to go back, but I wasn’t ready to give up on this. Not yet.

“Since what they think and say doesn’t matter, I’ll say it again. You’re pretty. You’re beautiful. You…you’re…”

She laughed. “Do I make you speechless?”

“You can steal my breath any time you want.”

“You wanna turn me into a thief?”

“You already are one.”

“Oh?” She glanced over her shoulder at me. “And what did I steal?”

This flirting…it felt different than the other times. It was deeper, more heartfelt. And speaking of hearts, I kinda wanted to say that she stole mine, but that was corny, wasn’t it?

But it didn’t matter. I didn’t need to answer, because she turned around on my lap and planted a big kiss on me, a kiss that started out tame but quickly turned passionate. April moved against me, rubbing herself against me, and I grew hard immediately. My hands rubbed up and down her back. She was wearing a pink pajama set, and the soft material made it so easy to feel every inch of her. Still, I slid my hands up the back of her shirt to feel her smooth skin and to push her closer toward me…and my mouth.

“Oh, God,” I whispered against her lips before we kissed again.

She pulled back, breathless, her arms wrapped around the back of my head as she continued to dry hump me. “Just…just you wait.”

Amy stared me straight in the eye as she reached down and lifted my shirt up and over my head. Not about to let myself be the only one undressed, I quickly removed her top. Her full, ripe boobs popped out, and I palmed them, squeezing them, teasing her nipples.

She shifted against me and lifted up only high enough to pull down her pajama bottoms. Sex outdoors. And close to the cabins. If anyone found us, we would be in a ton of trouble.

But I didn’t care. And I didn’t think April did either. And it wasn’t too fast or too slow. It was pretty much perfect. Yeah, so maybe we didn’t have a ton of time, but it didn’t feel rushed either.

I lifted up, and April wrapped her arms around my neck. I pulled down my pajama pants—no boxers today—and even though I want to feel all of her naked body against me, I know she wouldn’t go for that. Not out here.

But even though we were outside, it still felt like we were alone, like we were in a safe little bubble where no one could see us, no one could bother us. No on could stop us.

April was leading the way, taking charge, and she slid down on top of me, riding me. The entire time, she kept her eyes open, and I loved watching the little flickers in her facial expression when I thrust against her or massaged her shoulders or gripped her ass. It was more powerful, more personal, keeping our eyes open.

If I didn’t know any better, I would say that we were making love rather than just having sex. A couple of other times, I thought we might have been, but there was very little doubt this time around.

Making love. Us. April and me.

April

I couldn’t hold back any longer. When my orgasm hit me, I had to close my eyes, and I cried out Wes’s name. My arms wrapped around him tightly, and I relished the sense of security I felt while being in his embrace. It had felt a little different this time. More intense. More passionate. More bonding.

More loving.

For a long moment, I didn’t move. I just stayed in his arms, basking in the after glow, but when I noticed that Wes was staring at me intensely, I pulled back and giggled. “What are you thinking about?”

He took a deep breath that caused me to rise up on his lap. He looked nervous.

“I want you to run away with me,” he said, his voice low.

I could not have been more surprised.

“In your dreams.” I giggled.

He didn’t say anything.

“That’s crazy talk.” Wasn’t it? Running away? What about finishing high school? What about college? We couldn’t just up and leave.

“It’s not that crazy,” he grumbled. “You hop on my bike. We ride away. Nothing else to it.”

It was crazy. Wild. Reckless.

And he was deadly serious.

Part of me was ecstatic at the thought and the gesture. That he even wanted to run away with me meant so much, but I knew it was nothing but a fantasy. It wouldn’t happen. It couldn’t.

He tilted my chin up so I was forced to look at him, and I could see that he saw my doubt. “Don’t you want to go? To leave? Why would you want to stick around? Your father is reprehensible. He’s going to do everything he can to make your life your worst nightmare. You know this. Those guys he wants to serve you up to? Don’t forget that. Oh, and how about the way he is trying to force you to listen to him into going to an inferior school just because he knows people at the one who can spy on you.”

I winced. Wes had a point, but spying? Dad wouldn’t go to that length, would he?

Actually, he probably would.

Wes started to rub my back. “I don’t want you to be resigned to an existence of being an obedient breeding machine to some scumbag. I want to save you, to take you way from all of this.”

I frowned as frustration welled up inside of me. I hated that this was my life, but it was, and there wasn’t anything I could do about it. If Wes couldn’t accept that, well, that would be on him.

“I just can’t. I can’t run away with you.” It hurt me so much to say that, and I rushed to add, “I have my mom and Penelope. I can’t. I can’t leave them there.”

Wes scowled. “You shouldn’t throw your life away for them.”

My hurt temper flared at this, and I jerked away from him so that I could finally pull up my pajama pants, and I tugged down on my shirt too for good measure. Tears formed in my eyes, and I was angry. So angry. “Of course you wouldn’t understand. You can’t. You never had a family to care about, so how would you know what it’s like to leave your loved ones behind? You can’t because you’ve never had any.”

There was a long moment of stony silence. Then Wes’s face hardened into the placid expression I only saw when I first met him. It was the face that hid everything and promised nothing.

“You’re right,” he told me, his voice neutral. Then he got up, fixed his clothes, grabbed the blanket, and headed back down the mountain.

I was still reeling from my indignation too much to feel badly about what I had said. I trailed after him back to my cabin. After breakfast and a last big group prayer session, we all boarded the bus again. This time, Wes sat with some other girl.

I scoffed and sat elsewhere. I wasn’t hurt, I tried to tell myself.

I was lying.