Read Diamonds in the Dust Online
Authors: Beryl Matthews
‘You take care now and rest.’
Stan watched them leave and then laid his head back, closing his eyes. He’d taken to these youngsters from the moment they had come to him, and prayed for a happy outcome for this, but that hope faded with each day that passed.
‘Come and sit down. We have to talk.’ After another fretful night, Dora had come to a decision. They couldn’t go on like this. Tom and Lily looked just as weary when they settled down to see what she had to say.
Dora didn’t waste any time. This was going to upset them, but it had to be faced, and the sooner the better for all their sakes. ‘It’s just over a week now and there’s no sign of Mum, so we’ve got to start thinking about ourselves. We don’t know what’s happened to her, and we must accept the fact that we might never know.’
Lily made a sound like a stifled sob, and Dora grasped her hand. ‘We need you to be brave, sweetie.’
When Lily nodded, Dora continued. ‘We’ve also got
to admit that we didn’t know her as well as we thought. She had secrets, and I think Stan knows more than he’s telling. It looks to me as if he’s trying to protect us from something.’
‘I thought that, too,’ Tom admitted. ‘He’s a good man, but I’d rather know the truth than go on like this.’
‘We all would. And until the truth comes out we’ve got to get on with our lives.’ Dora hesitated. ‘We’ve got to assume that Mum isn’t coming back.’
‘Never?’ Lily whispered.
‘Yes, sweetie.’ Dora didn’t know how she was managing to sound so calm. ‘If she could, or wanted to, she would have come home by now. She’s either left us … or she’s dead. Whatever’s happened, we’ve got to look out for ourselves.’
‘Dora’s right, Lily.’ Quiet tears were rolling down the little girl’s face and Tom handed her his handkerchief. ‘Stop crying, and let’s see what Dora thinks we ought to do.’
Lily obediently mopped her face and blew her nose, then gave her brother back his handkerchief. ‘I’ll be brave.’
‘We know you will.’ Tom ruffled her hair. ‘We’ll be all right. We’ve got Dora, and she has all the brains in this family.’
Dora felt herself sag slightly. The burden had just been placed firmly on her shoulders. That was only to be expected because she was the eldest, and she was determined not to let her brother and sister down. ‘Is it
agreed that we don’t want to move from here?’
She received vigorous nods. ‘Right. I must concentrate on finding a job, but it might take a while. I’ve worked out that we have enough money to last another two weeks if we’re careful, but when that’s gone there are things we can pawn. Once I’m working again we might be able to redeem them.’
‘That won’t matter,’ Tom said. ‘There are plenty of things we can do without. Mum’s bits and pieces can go first.’
‘Agreed, but let’s hope it doesn’t come to that. Now, the other thing worrying me is Stan. We’re putting a great strain on him. I suggest we stop pestering him and allow the police to get on with their work.’
‘I didn’t mean to shout at him.’ Lily was looking upset again.
‘We know that.’ Tom patted his sister’s hand. ‘And Stan understood, so don’t you fret about it. But Dora’s right, we’ve got to leave him in peace. He isn’t strong enough, and he’s wearing himself out by running around for us.’
‘I won’t do it again, but can we see him sometimes? I like him.’ Lily was clearly worried about this.
‘Yes, we’ll see him about once a week and ask if there’s any progress in the investigation.’ When Lily accepted, Dora started to relax. She had been dreading having this conversation, but keeping her family together was all that mattered to her now, and she would do whatever was necessary.
She sat back as the tight knot inside her eased. ‘If either
of you have any worries, or ideas how we can manage better, I want you to say so. We’ll sit down every evening and talk things through.’
‘Good idea.’ Tom smiled easily for the first time in days.
When Lily did the same, Dora knew she had been right to make them face the loss of their mother. ‘It’s a nice day, so I suggest we go out somewhere. We’ll take sandwiches and make a day of it, shall we? Where would you like to go?’
‘To the park with the lake in it.’ Lily grabbed hold of Tom’s arm. ‘Have you still got that boat? We could sail it.’
‘It’ll probably sink.’
Lily giggled. ‘Then you’ll have to go in the water and get it.’
Dora never ceased to marvel at the rapid changes in her sister’s mood. One minute she could be crying and the next, laughing. Lily had a much more emotional nature than either herself or Tom. ‘Is Regent’s Park all right with you, Tom?’ she asked.
‘Perfect on a day like this.’ He turned his attention back to Lily. ‘Come and help get the sandwiches ready. What do you want in them? Or is that a silly question?’
‘Jam!’
Tom sighed. ‘It was a silly question. Better take a wet flannel with us, Dora. Or we could always dip her in the lake to get rid of the sticky mess.’
With a shriek, Lily attacked her brother, laughing as he fended her off.
‘Stop fighting, you two,’ Dora ordered, trying to keep her expression stern. This day out had been a good idea. It was already taking their minds off the distress they were suffering. It was only a temporary relief, but welcome nonetheless.
An hour later they set off with a variety of sandwiches, and the wooden sailing boat rescued from the cupboard under the stairs. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky, and they were looking forward to a day in the park.
There were quite a few people about, but they found a spot by a tree where they could watch everything going on around the lake. The warmest day in May so far had brought families out with children and grandparents. There were also a few young men who had been disabled during the war. It always tore Dora apart when she saw them.
One young man came and sat quite near them. He had lost a leg and a hand, and he was on his own. Dora smiled at him. ‘Lovely day, isn’t it?’
He seemed startled that she should speak to him, but he smiled back and nodded.
‘I’m hungry, Dora!’ Lily yelled as she raced back from the lake where she had been playing with Tom.
‘So am I.’ Tom was right behind his sister.
Dora opened the bag with the food in it, and gasped. ‘My goodness! You’ve made enough for dozens. Lily, go and ask that young man if he’d like to help us eat this lot.’
Without protest, Lily went and sat on the grass next to
him. Dora said softly, ‘Go and give him a hand if he needs it, Tom, but be careful. You know how independent some of them can be.’
‘Like Stan. He hates feeling so helpless, doesn’t he?’ Without waiting for an answer, Tom joined Lily, who was chattering away to the man.
It looked as if he was trying to refuse, but Lily and Tom were having none of it. In the end he pulled himself up and came over to where Dora was setting out the picnic.
‘This is very kind of you. My name’s Alan,’ he said, introducing himself politely.
Tom took over. ‘This is our sister, Dora, the chatterbox is Lily, and I’m Tom. Sit down, Alan, and let’s see if we can work our way through these sandwiches.’
Tom was growing up fast, and becoming a real gentleman, Dora noticed. There was a confidence about him as well. But they all needed to be like him if they were going to survive this crisis.
Alan rested his crutches against the tree and sat down. He carried out the tricky moves very well, and they hadn’t felt the need to interfere.
‘I’m having jam,’ Lily announced, ‘but there’s other things like cheese, cold meat or tomatoes. What you going to have?’
Alan frowned in concentration. ‘Oh, such a choice, but I think I’ll have cheese, please.’
Lily handed him the cheese packet so he could take one. ‘Our neighbour, Stan, walks with crutches, or a stick sometimes. He was hurt bad in the war, too.’
‘Lily!’ Dora stopped her sister. She knew that most of the ex-servicemen didn’t like talking about the war.
‘It’s all right,’ Alan told Dora. ‘It’s refreshing to find someone who doesn’t shy away from the subject. Do you know, some people I’ve known for years actually cross the road so they won’t have to speak to me.’
‘That’s disgraceful!’ Tom exclaimed. ‘They ought to be ashamed of themselves!’
‘I can understand it. Many just don’t know what to say when they see me like this.’
‘Well, I don’t understand it!’ Dora said indignantly. ‘You’re still the same person you were before the war. Stan’s in almost constant pain, but that doesn’t change the man he is inside. And your injuries don’t change the man you were born to be.’
She stopped talking, looking embarrassed. ‘Oh, I’m sorry. There I go again. I’m not making sense, am I? I know what I mean, but it’s hard to put it into words.’
‘You’re making perfect sense. I wish more people could see it that way.’ His smile was grim. ‘But I must correct you on one point. Those of us who’ve survived the horror of the trenches will never be quite the same.’
‘No, some of you will be stronger, others will always be damaged.’ Dora gave a hesitant smile. ‘Please forgive me, Alan. I get so mad about how little’s being done to help those in great need.’
Tom grinned. ‘If Dora could she would have put all the politicians and generals in the trenches and made them
wade around in waist-deep mud while the enemy fired at them.’
‘That did cross my mind from time to time.’ Alan turned his attention back to Dora and studied her intently, respect showing in his grey eyes. ‘I think you’re a remarkable young woman.’
‘There’s nothing remarkable about me,’ she laughed. ‘I’ve always been told I think too much, especially for a female, always wanting to know the reason for everything.’
‘That’s good, don’t change. What do you do with yourself, Dora?’
‘Do?’ She was puzzled for a moment. ‘Oh, I work, of course. Only I haven’t got a job at the moment. I have to find something.’
‘What kind of work?’
‘I was a daily housemaid.’
Alan grimaced in disbelief. ‘What a waste! You’re obviously intelligent. Surely you could get something better.’
‘Work’s hard to come by. I’ll take anything I can get.’
He fished in his pocket, brought out a small notepad with a pencil tied to it with string. He opened the pad with his mouth, rested it on his knee and began to write laboriously.
Noting his struggle, Dora said softly, ‘You were right handed.’
‘Yes, but I’m getting used to using my left hand for most things. Writing’s still awkward, though.’ He looked up. ‘But I’m one of the lucky ones. I’ve only lost my right
leg from below the knee. I’ll soon have a false one, thanks to a fine doctor I know. He reckons I’ll be able to walk well once I get used to it, and they’re giving me a hand as well, so I should look almost normal. From a distance, anyway.’
‘That is good news.’ Dora was so pleased for him.
Alan finished writing and held the pad towards her. ‘Tear out that page. It’s the address of a centre for ex-servicemen who’ve lost limbs. A Doctor Burridge has set it up, and they’re always desperate for help. Go and see them, Dora.’
‘Thanks.’ Dora put the note in her purse. ‘Can I say you sent me?’
‘Of course. My name’s Alan Harrington.’
Tom and Lily had been quietly eating, more interested in what was going on around the lake than the conversation Dora had been having with Alan. Now she was full, Lily was eager to get back to the water.
‘Let’s sail the boat again, Tom. You come too, Dora, it’s good fun.’
‘You go, I’ll just clear up this mess and be with you in a minute.’
Alan stood up and settled on his crutches again. ‘I have to go now, but thank you for the sandwiches. It has been interesting talking to you.’
‘Thank you for joining us,’ Tom said politely.
‘Yes, we’ve enjoyed your company.’ Dora meant it. Alan seemed a nice young man.
‘Bye bye,’ Lily waved, and began to drag her brother towards the lake.
‘I hope everything works out well for you.’
‘Thank you, Dora.’
She watched him make his way across the park, and could picture him without the crutches, walking normally. She hoped she would see him again …
‘Dora!’
‘I’m coming, Lily.’
They had worked out a routine. Tom took Lily to school and collected her afterwards, but now Dora wasn’t working she took over the shopping, relieving Tom of that chore. She knew he disliked shopping for food, although he never complained. It worried her that he was no longer playing with friends after school, but since their mother’s disappearance he had let that activity drop. The three Bentley children had drawn close in this terrible crisis, protecting each other. When she had mentioned this to her brother last night, he had just waved away her concerns for him, saying that they would sort themselves out when this was all over.
Dora’s thoughts turned to their day in the park. Their mother had always insisted upon good manners, and that teaching had been very evident in the way her brother and
sister had dealt with Alan. Even Lily, young as she was, couldn’t have been faulted on her conduct.
After clearing away the breakfast things, Dora chose clothes from her mother’s wardrobe. She’d never bothered about what she wore as long as she was clean and tidy, but things were different now. She was eighteen, and had begun noticing couples together with their children. Not that there was much chance of her marrying. Women far outnumbered the men after the slaughter of the war. Like many young girls she was probably destined to remain a spinster. Still, Lily was only six, and would need her for some years. Tom at twelve would soon be a young man, and it wouldn’t be long before her brother was being pursued by hordes of girls.
The outfit she chose was perfect, smart without being showy. She hadn’t realised that her mother had such nice things, and all matching. It was important to be well dressed, because she was off to Wandsworth today in the hope of getting a job at the address Alan had given her.
With a final adjustment to the hat, Dora set off for the train station. If they didn’t need anyone at this place, then she would spend the day searching for a job. She didn’t want to go home tonight without some good news. It was now up to her to take over the role of mother to Tom and Lily.
The house was easy to find. It backed on to Wandsworth Common, and was very large. Dora stood by the gate and took in the scene. It had once been a grand house, but now it was sorely neglected. A coat of paint would
do wonders, though. The garden was also overgrown, but that could be put right with a bit of effort.
The front door was open when she reached it, and when she knocked a sliver of dark red paint fell off. Her hopes of finding a job here disappeared. It didn’t look as if they had enough money to employ staff. The building was falling down around them. Dora couldn’t think why Alan had urged her to come.
Ah well, she was here now and might as well talk to someone. She tapped more cautiously this time. ‘Anyone there?’ she called, stepping just inside the door.
A head appeared from a door on her left, sporting a mop of unruly grey hair. ‘You’ll have to knock louder than that, ducky. I’m a bit Mutt and Jeff – deaf,’ he translated in case she hadn’t understood.
‘I didn’t like to,’ she told him. ‘I was afraid the door would fall apart.’
He tipped his head back and roared. ‘Come in, come in.’
The room he ushered her into was absolute chaos. There were heaps of newspapers, books, boxes of clothes, and the table was littered with letters.
‘Sit down.’
Dora glanced round. Every chair was piled high with something or other. ‘Where?’ she asked.
‘What? Don’t whisper.’
She raised her voice. ‘Where shall I sit?’
‘No need to shout, I ain’t that deaf.’ He looked quite offended as he swept one chair clear, letting everything fall on the floor. ‘There.’
‘Thank you.’ She sat carefully. The chair didn’t look too safe. ‘Are you in charge?’
When he didn’t answer she raised the volume a little. ‘Are you in charge?’
‘Me? Good Lord, no! I couldn’t organise a … party in a brewery.’
From the look of the place, Dora would certainly agree with that! The room looked like a junk shop.
‘The doc’s the one in charge. Doctor Burridge, that is. Don’t know if he’s here, though. You want to see him?’
‘If possible.’ Dora was now positive she’d had a wasted journey.
‘Come on then, ducky. Let’s see if we can track him down.’
The chair gave an alarming crack when she stood up, but it stayed in one piece, much to her surprise. She almost had to run to keep up with him. He might be elderly, but he could certainly move at a pace, she thought, as she took two steps to his one.
He was darting a quick glance in each door along the corridor. Finally, he grunted in satisfaction. ‘Ah, you’re in luck. You’ll have to wait until he’s finished with one of the lads. He don’t like being disturbed when he’s working.’
‘I understand.’ Dora followed the man into the room, and they both stood just inside the door.
The doctor was middle-aged, Dora guessed, but it was hard to tell as the dark circles under his eyes and lines of fatigue probably made him look older than he was. It was a gentle face, though, she thought, as she watched him haul a young man upright.
‘Bloody hell!’ the man exclaimed. ‘I’m never going to be able to walk with this!’
‘You won’t know until you try.’ The doctor patted his shoulder, then helped him to stand, put a walking stick in his hand and stepped back. ‘Have a go.’
Dora watched, hardly breathing. The concentration on the young man’s face was intense, but he didn’t move. She had her hands clasped tightly together, and everything inside her silently urged him to take that first step. When she saw his shoulders drop in defeat, she took an involuntary step forward.
‘I can’t do it! I can’t!’
That was too much for Dora. Before she realised what she was doing, she was standing in front of the young man. ‘My mother always told me that there’s no such word in the English language.’
‘What?’ The patient scowled at her. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘There’s no such word as
can’t
.’ Dora knew the doctor was watching her, wondering who she was, but she didn’t care. This young man couldn’t give up! ‘If you don’t persevere you’ll be on crutches or in a wheelchair for the rest of your life. Is that what you want?’
He shook his head, near to tears, but he was standing straight again.
Dora took hold of his arm and smiled up at him, speaking gently this time. ‘It isn’t going to be easy, but given time I’m sure you’ll master this.’
‘Think so?’
‘I
know
so! What’s your name?’
‘John.’
‘Nice to meet you, John, I’m Dora. I’ll hold you while you have another try, shall I?’ She glanced at the doctor who was standing with his arms folded. He hadn’t said a word, but she didn’t doubt he would have a few to say when they were on their own. She didn’t know what had come over her, but she hadn’t been able to stand by. ‘What does John have to do, doctor?’
‘Lean on Dora, John, and try to throw the leg forward.’
After a lot of panting, John suddenly stepped forward.
‘That’s the idea, now one more,’ the doctor urged.
In fact John managed two more steps.
‘Well done!’ The doctor placed a wheelchair behind John and made him sit down. ‘That’s enough for today. We’ll try again tomorrow, but if you keep that up you’ll soon be walking on your own.’
The young man took hold of Dora’s hand, gratitude in his eyes. ‘Thanks. Who’s this beautiful girl, Doc? She certainly brightens the place up.’
‘I’ve no idea, John, but if you can look after yourself for a while, I’ll find out.’
‘I’m all right now.’ John never took his eyes off Dora. ‘Are you going to be around here much?’
‘I was hoping to be.’ She glanced at the doctor, but his expression was unreadable. ‘I think I might just have ruined my chances, though.’
‘Come with me.’ The doctor glanced round at her when they reached the door. ‘Miss …?’
‘Bentley.’
There was no sign of the man who had let her in
when they walked along the corridor and into a small tidy room. The doctor indicated that she should sit.
‘I’m not going to apologise,’ she blurted out the moment he was also seated.
‘Apologise for what?’
‘For interfer—’ Dora stopped suddenly when she looked into his eyes. He was laughing at her! ‘Ah, I thought you’d be mad at me.’
‘I’m always pushing these boys to try harder. I get sworn at quite regularly. But to have a stranger, and a pretty one at that, march up and tell him that he can walk, was just what John needed. For that I thank you. Now, will you tell me why you’re here?’
‘I met Alan Harrington in Regent’s Park yesterday, and when I told him I was looking for work he gave me this address.’
‘I know Alan well, and we can do with all the help we can get.’
‘I can see that, sir, but I think Alan misunderstood. I need to earn a wage because I have a younger brother and sister to support. It’s obvious that you need voluntary workers.’ Dora shook her head and began to stand up. ‘I’m so sorry. I would have liked to help here.’
‘Sit down, please.’
She did as he asked, and sighed with disappointment. To be doing something so worthwhile, something she felt strongly about, would make her very happy. ‘Would you tell me about the work you’re doing here?’
‘I set up this place in an effort to get some of the young men back on their feet, even if those feet are artificial.
We rely on charity donations to help run this house, and I’m continually making friends and colleagues empty their pockets for me. And I don’t apologise for that.’ He looked up and the smile he gave Dora transformed him, wiping away the fatigue. ‘I grew tired of seeing how little was being done for these men and decided to do something about it myself. This neglected house belongs to me, so I thought it was time to put it to good use. It’s a place for the men to meet others who have also been injured, and I’m here as often as I can to give help and encouragement. Sometimes all they need is someone to talk to. They’ve come to regard this house as somewhere they can meet, relax and feel comfortable. I can only help a small number, but every man I see take a couple of faltering steps is worth all the hard work.’
Dora caught his enthusiasm, admiring his dedication. She leant forward eagerly. ‘I could come in now and again, and perhaps bring my brother and sister with me.’
‘That is kind of you, but wouldn’t they find it distressing here?’
‘No.’ Dora dismissed the suggestion. ‘Our neighbour was badly injured and has great difficulty walking, using crutches or a stick. He wouldn’t let the doctors do what they wanted and he’s still in a lot of pain. Tom and Lily are very fond of him, and when they met Alan, they treated him just like anyone else.’
‘That’s good.’ He sat back and frowned. ‘What’s your neighbour’s name?’
‘Stan Crawford.’
‘Ah, I met him on a train the other day. He seemed a
fine young man, but he needs help. I asked him to come and see me at the hospital, but he hasn’t turned up yet.’
‘He never told us that. I’ll let his sister know, and she’ll try and persuade him to see you.’
‘He’ll probably ignore her.’
Dora’s mouth turned up at the corners. ‘No doubt.’
‘Ah, I summed him up correctly then? He’s a strong character.’
‘And stubborn.’
‘I’m glad to hear it. That means he’ll keep on fighting. Now, if you work here four days a week I’ll pay you four and sixpence. I know you can’t live on that, but can I ask you to do it until you find a permanent job?’
‘Yes!’ Dora could hardly believe this, and accepted eagerly. It was better than nothing and would help. ‘What days would you like me to come?’
‘You can choose those yourself. Just let me know when we can expect you. When I’m here you can help me with the paperwork, the rest of the time I want you to talk to the boys and encourage them like you did with John. None of them stay here, they come in daily.’ He sighed. ‘I wish we could help more, but we haven’t got the staff, and there are only twenty-four hours in the day.’
‘I’m sure you squeeze in an extra one here and there.’
He gave a wry smile. ‘I do try.’
Dora stood up. ‘Thank you, sir, I’ll be here tomorrow. Oh, and have you got any paint?’
Dr Burridge looked puzzled. ‘What for?’
‘I want to paint the front door. It’s a disgrace.’
‘Is it? I hadn’t noticed.’ He couldn’t keep a straight face as he lied. ‘What colour would you like?’
‘Bright blue, please.’
He chuckled. ‘That should get us noticed.’
‘It’s about time everyone knew what you’re doing here. A sign on the gate wouldn’t hurt, either. And we could put a donation box by the door.’
The doctor was openly laughing now. ‘I must thank Alan for sending you here. I’ll see you tomorrow, Dora.’
On the train home Dora’s thoughts drifted back to her time with Dr Burridge, hardly being able to believe the way she had behaved. Only a short time ago she would never have dared to be so forward, always preferring to stay in the background. The change in her must have happened when their mother disappeared and she’d had to take responsibility for her brother and sister. She’d had to grow up quickly and become more self-assured.
She gazed out of the train window, and realised with satisfaction that she quite liked the new Dora Bentley.