Die For You: Catastrophe Series, Book 1 (26 page)

His gaze held hers, filled with both love and desire. “I’m going to come,” he rasped.

He reached out and grabbed the back of her neck with one hand and crushed his mouth against hers, thrusting his tongue inside, mimicking his movements underneath. Her body shook with the force of her own orgasm, her breath bursting out in heavy gasps against his lips. Adam thrust harder, held her tighter, swept up in his release. She felt hot semen burst inside of her.

Afterwards, she fell against him, exhausted by the rush of desire and emotions that had just raged through them both.

He held her close to his chest. “I love you,” he murmured against her hair.

She threaded her fingers through his large, rough fingers. “I love you too,” she told him. “I love you so much.”

“And those shoes,” he said, his hand on her ankle. “Love those fucking shoes.”

“I love them too.” She grinned.

Chapter Thirty-Three

A slight breeze brushed Rachel’s cheek, cooling her sweat-dampened skin. Even with all the windows open, it was cooler outside than inside. The triple-digit summer evenings in the valley weren’t so bad when you went outside at night. When they’d first arrived at the farm, it had been spring and gorgeous, similar to San Diego weather, but two months later, the valley was stifling hot and she was having trouble adjusting.

Adam had noticed how uncomfortable she was inside and told her to go out on the deck and he’d get a beer and meet her in a sec.

So here she was, sitting on the deck with lanterns lit around her, waiting for her man. She smiled, took a sip of iced tea, happy to spend a quiet evening at home on the farm. No freaks with guns, no kidnappings, no shoot-outs tonight. Just peace. She leaned her head back against the lounge chair.

She thought about the events from earlier in the day, still disturbed to learn Spike was at large and wounded. A group of bad guys, as Josie had called them, had apparently swept into the animal compound before Trevor and Christian could load Spike into their truck. The men had taken Spike while the others had been in the main lodge. Trevor, Christian, Sebastian, Phoebe and Josie had all gotten away safely and returned to the farm, but Spike was back in the fold of his gang, most likely living in a mansion in the high country with a nebulous group of former outlaws, only an hour or two from their farm.

Wasn’t that lovely?

Fortunately, Sebastian and Phoebe had agreed to return to the farm with Josie since it was closer than their house. They were staying the night on the tour bus since Christian had offered to bed down on the couch in Trevor’s apartment to make room for them. Rachel didn’t know how long they’d stay, but she prayed like hell they’d decide to make this their permanent residence. Tomorrow, she’d show them more around the main house, including the empty bedrooms they could use. Help them to see they could be comfortable here. She grinned. Hopefully, Adam would be okay with the idea of living with
Crazy Bastard
.

She placed her hand on her stomach and smiled again. She’d noticed that life kept going, and during the last two eventful days, she’d forgotten this important life-changing event had occurred. But when she stopped for a moment, the news would slip back into her mind and she’d smile. Pregnant. She was pregnant. Going to have a baby. It was like a special treat she remembered occasionally. Something special, just for her.

And for once, she wasn’t terrified of the outcome. It would be okay, she was sure of it.

Adam loved her, and they were together. That was all that mattered.

And this baby wouldn’t be the only child. Josie was with them. And she was fine. They’d all just encountered her worst nightmare—being kidnapped by a gang of freaks—and came out the other side, battered and bruised but alive. Alive.

And she’d taken care of herself. Rachel now could protect herself and her baby. And she would. This new world couldn’t take her down. She was strong and she’d survive.

She sighed, tilted her chin up, amazed at the brilliant night sky arching overhead. She’d never noticed the stars while growing up in San Diego. They hadn’t been able to compete with the dense haze of city lights. But out here, they blazed like opalescent white paint splattered against dark blue butcher paper.

“The sky is spectacular tonight, isn’t it?” said a male voice from behind her.

Rachel jumped in her seat and spilled tea on her shirt. “Dammit!” she sputtered. She recognized that voice, and it certainly wasn’t Adam’s, and it was the last voice she wanted to hear at the moment.

“Sorry,” Christian said. “Mind if I sit down?”

“Yeah, go ahead,” Rachel grumbled, patting her chest with a napkin. She didn’t really want to talk, but the air needed to be cleared, didn’t it? They’d been stiff and awkward toward each other all day. She’d hated it.

Survivors need to stick together
, she reminded herself.

Christian sat down in the creaky lawn chair next to her. “I’m sorry I acted like such an ass yesterday. Guess I kinda lost my mind there for a bit.” He looked genuinely embarrassed.

Rachel pursed her lips. She supposed now would be the time to comfort him and say it was okay, she understood, no worries. That what he’d done wasn’t really that bad. That’s what the old Rachel would have said, desperate to keep any friend she could find. But it wasn’t okay. And there was no way in hell she was letting him out of this. “Why did you act like that?” she said, the anger she’d felt rushing back. “Why did you say those things, Christian?” She paused. “You hurt me.”

Christian winced. “I’m sorry. I talked to Adam earlier and cleared the air. We both agreed we overreacted.”

Rachel nodded. When she’d tried to bring the pregnancy up and talk about what had happened, to find out how Adam felt, he’d shushed her, told her to wait, that he wanted to hear Christian’s explanation first.

“I met Adam inside and asked him if I could come out here to talk to you alone for a few minutes so we could clear things up.”

“That’s good,” she replied. More than good. Her brow furrowed. “I just don’t understand what set you off, why you acted like that. What happened? Why were you so upset?”

“It freaked me out, knowing you were pregnant. I knew it was always a possibility, but it caught me off guard.”

She’d never caught any spark of attraction between them and had considered them to be good friends. But maybe she’d been wrong, maybe he felt something she didn’t?

“Is it because you’re worried you’ll be left out?”

“No—”

“I really think we’ll meet other survivors. More women. I think you could meet someone who is right for you.”

“Yeah, I know, but—”

“I know it’ll be weird, but I think it will be—”

“Rachel. Stop.”

She shut her mouth and looked at him with wide eyes.

“Sorry.” He rubbed his face with two hands before looking back at her. His black eyes glittered in the soft moon light. “I need to tell you something.” He swallowed and wetted his lips. He looked off in the distance. “My wife was eight months pregnant when she died.”

Rachel gasped and put her fingers over her mouth.

“We had two children,” he continued grimly. “This last one, our third, another boy, was a surprise. Actually, a blessing.” He dropped his chin to his chest and squeezed his eyes shut. “My wife got the virus two days after the baby shower. I rushed her to the hospital, but it was full. The ER was a mess, total chaos. I sat next to her, holding her hand, helpless, while she bled out and died on a gurney in the hallway, screaming for someone to save the baby. But no one could. No one did. And the baby died too.”

Rachel wrapped her arms around her middle, shattered by the image Christian painted in her mind.

“I guess finding out you were pregnant brought it all back. And when Adam came out with that positive pregnancy test in his hand…”

“You got scared.”

“Yes,” he agreed. “I just don’t want to see anything happen to you. I’m sorry if I scared you too, planting seeds in your mind of scenarios that will never happen.”

“I understand,” she said, her heart heavy but at peace. She did understand. It felt good to have her faith in Christian restored.

“And Trevor kicked my ass and knocked some sense into me,” he quipped.

“Gosh, you two. That was like
Clash of the Titans
.”

“Men like to talk with their fists. That’s all over with.” He grinned. “And Adam and I talked and decided how this should play out. How we should deal with the baby.”

She crooked an eyebrow. “You did?”

“Yes, we did,” Adam said from behind her.

She jumped again, spilling more tea on her shirt. “Oh, damn. You guys have
got
to stop startling me like that.”

“Sorry, babe.” Adam laughed and sat in a chair on her other side. “Talk almost over?”

“Christian was about to tell me your
plan
,” she said skeptically.

“The plan is you’re my woman. I’m in charge of your welfare and the baby’s,” Adam said. “The other men at this farm have your back too. We’re all protecting this baby.”

“We’re keeping you and that baby safe,” Christian agreed. “All of us.”

Chapter Thirty-Four

That night, Rachel watched Adam stroll to their bed, completely naked, his hands behind his back. She was already drowsy, snuggled beneath the covers in her typical sleep uniform—Adam’s USMC T-shirt and nothing underneath. But seeing Adam naked like that perked her right on up.

“I’ve got a present for you,” he said. “Open your hand.”

“What is it?” she asked eagerly as she sat up. He knew she loved surprises.

Adam leaned forward and slapped a Snickers bar into her open palm.

“Oh, my God!” She gasped and held it in her hand like a precious jewel. “This is wonderful.” She met his warm gaze, her eyes pricking with tears. “You know Snickers are my favorite. Where have you been hiding this?”

“I’ve been saving it for a rainy day, and today was pretty cloudy.” He sat down next to her, still totally naked and hot as hell, his abs contracting invitingly. He reached up and wiped a tear off her cheek, his words going straight to her heart.

I love him
. Not lust. Not simple friendship—love.

“I have something else for you.”

“Hmm?” she said absently as she tore into the candy bar.

“Rachel? Look at me, honey.”

She glanced up.

“Rachel…I want you to be my wife,” he said simply. And then his other hand came from around his back and opened to reveal a black jewelry box. Her breath caught in her throat and her hand went over her heart. She dropped the candy bar. She hadn’t expected this, hadn’t expected it at all. The small box creaked open in his large hand to reveal a platinum band with an enormous princess-cut diamond on top. Wow. Tears immediately pricked in her eyes again. All women dreamed of this moment. All women. Even if they pretended they didn’t want it, they did. And he was giving it to her. Even now, when all was lost at the end of the world, he was taking the time to give this to her.

“Rachel, will you be my wife?”

“Wife?” Her fingers went to touch the ring and a sob escaped her mouth. Adam loved her. He wanted to marry her and become a family. This was permanent, real.

But then reality shattered her happy fantasy.

She looked into his warm eyes. “I would love to marry you. I would love to be able to call you my husband. But we can’t get married. There’s no one to marry us. No one can give us a marriage license. I can’t go down to Social Security and change my name. Social Security doesn’t exist anymore. There’s really no reason for it. No reason to change my name.” More tears welled up in her eyes as she felt the happiness slipping out of her grasp.

“So? That’s the beauty of it. We don’t need to fill out any forms. We just do it, make our own decisions.” He took her hand and slipped the ring on her finger. It fit perfectly. Not too big, not to small—the same could be said for the glittering diamond on top. “We’ll say our vows to each other. I want to be able to refer to you as my wife. You’re having a baby, so we need to be a family. You can decide that you’ll be Rachel Sanchez from now on. It’s that easy.”

“Rachel Sanchez?” She blinked. She was quiet for a moment, staring at the ring, thinking about what he’d said. He was right. It really could be that easy. No government interfering, no one to say they shouldn’t, nothing in their way. All it would take was the two of them deciding to make it happen. The freedom was exhilarating.

This new world was whatever they wanted to make out of it. If they got married, they got married. The rules had been thrown out the window.

“Let’s do it,” she said.

“Thank fuck,” Adam whispered as he bent down to capture her lips. She giggled at his words as he kissed her tenderly.

Suddenly, an important question popped into her mind. She broke from his kiss. “When did you pick up this ring? How did you have time, with everything that’s happened?”

He lay down next to her on the bed, looking very much like a man posing for a
Playgirl
centerfold. He grabbed her wrist and pulled her into his arms. She rested her hand against his chest, the hand with that dazzling ring on it that she couldn’t stop looking at. He wasn’t answering her. “Adam—”

He rested his chin on top of her head. “Last week, babe. I picked it up at a jewelers in Fresno last week when I went to town with Trevor for supplies.”

“So before the whole debacle yesterday, you’d already decided that you wanted to marry me?” A giant smile spread across her face.

“Yeah. I wanted to make sure you knew this is permanent. That if we met any other survivors, any other men, they would know immediately that you were mine. But now that you’re pregnant, it takes on greater meaning. I love you and I want us to be a family.”

“A family?” She swallowed. “I’m much better about it now, but I’m still worried that we won’t be able to stay safe. I’m worried about bringing a baby into this new world.”

He sighed. “Let’s cross that bridge when we come to it. One day at a time. The most important thing is that we’re together. I’m just happy that another life is coming into this world. We’re doing our part to restart humanity, right?”

“Right,” she agreed, his logic lightening her heart. She leaned back so she could meet his eyes. Those brown, sparkling eyes she’d seen through tinted glass all those weeks ago for the first time in San Diego. Who knew then, when she’d pointed a gun at him, that she’d end up marrying him? She smiled again. In fact, she couldn’t seem to stop.

He lifted his hand and rubbed his thumb across her lower lip, his eyes following the trace of his finger. Butterflies swirled in her belly at the possession in his gaze. “You’re mine. Having my ring on your finger will make that permanent. The idea of having my mark on you calms me the fuck down. I never planned on having a family in my old life. Back then, career came first. But in this new life children are everything.” He reached down and placed a hand over her lower stomach. “Every life is important now.”

Her heart felt so big. The smile on her face so large it almost hurt. “You’re such a nice man, Adam.”

“Nice man.” He chuckled. “Have you seen my gun collection? I think you have me confused with someone else.”

She looked again at her hand on his chest, at the ring, and relaxed. It would all be all right. It had to be. They were both quiet for a few minutes. Finally, she said, “You know what I wish?”

“Hmm?” he answered, still rubbing her lower stomach in a most delicious way.

“I wish we could go back in time, before the outbreak, to when I was still a student. I could be home during winter break and meet you, and we could start dating.”

He held her hand. “I’d return from my last tour to find Lori and Danny shacked up. But in the end I wouldn’t give a shit because I’d met you.”

“Yes.” She squeezed his fingers. “How did we meet?”

He thought for a moment. “At Balboa Park?”

She nodded. “I used to go there all the time.”

“You’re walking your dog, I’m walking my dog. We pass and they start sniffing, and the next thing you know we’re talking.”

“You do know I wouldn’t have a dog, right? I’m more of a cat person. I think that’s why all those dogs chased me. They could tell I’m a cat person.”

“I didn’t have a dog either, but it’s
my
fantasy.”

She laughed. “Okay then, but let me add to it. We end up meeting again at the local dog park. You ask me out. I think you’re handsome and heroic and I can hardly wait to get you in bed.” She poked his chest. “Soldier boy.”

He chuckled.

“See, we could have met and fallen in love, even without the outbreak. We have enough in common that we could have met before.”

“You like that idea? That’s important to you?”

“Yeah.”

“Rachel?” he said.

“Hmm?”

“Just for the record—” he turned his head to look at her, his eyes soft as he trailed a finger along her jaw, “—remember how you asked before if it was better to have survived or to be killed in the initial blast? I never answered your question. Well, I’m telling you now, it’s better to have survived. I’m fucking grateful to have survived and have a new life ahead of me. With you.”

Her throat tightened. “Stop,” she whispered. “You’re going to make me cry.”

He wrapped his arms around her. “Go for it.”

And she did cry. All over his gorgeous chest.