Die For You: Catastrophe Series, Book 1 (6 page)

“Thank you.” Her voice sounded throaty and dark, like Marilyn Monroe singing “Happy Birthday” to JFK.

Fucking hell.

Resistance was futile.

Adam was staring at her lips, leaning into her and lowering his head. Like he was going to…to… Her heart beat like crazy. No. No way. Was he going to kiss her? It was impossible.

Oh, wow. If only he would.

His right hand cupped the back of her neck. Her breath caught in her throat.

Oh. Dear. God.

What was he doing?

“What are you doing?” she squeaked.

“This,” he said in a deep, raspy voice that gave her the chills.

His lips crashed down, capturing her mouth in a breathless kiss. Urgent and hot. She put a hand against his chest, unsure for a moment.

Was it Christmas? Her birthday? How could she be so damn lucky?

His heart beat against her fingertips. She let go of her stiff surprise, melted into his embrace and burst into flame. She’d dreamt of this moment, and it played out just like her imagination, only better. His lips felt glorious. Warm, wet and perfect when fitted against her own. She loved the taste of him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her fingers touched the soft, shorn hair at the back of Adam’s head. She arched against him, pressing her breasts as close as possible. He slid his tongue between her lips and she thought she’d die from the bliss. They moaned into each other’s mouths.

He leaned her back into the truck and her head pillowed against her backpack. He lowered his massive body over hers, settling his hips gently between her legs. She whimpered. Digging large fingers into her hip, he hauled her pelvis against his.
Oh my!
Her body jolted. There was no way she could miss the massive hard-on pressed against her stomach. She wasn’t the only one consumed with desire, restless with lust. He wanted her as much as she wanted him. The knowledge shot heat straight between her thighs. Her hands went wild and made a beeline for the enormous penis cupped behind his jeans.

Her breasts smashed against his hard chest, so close she felt the slight rise and fall of his breath. His pelvis cradled her hips and the fly of his jeans notched between her legs. A large hand cupped her ass.

He groaned against her mouth.

“Adam.” Suddenly, her big Marine had her pinned. She blinked as he pressed close and kissed her again, grinding his erection against her hips.

Never, never had any kiss she’d ever had compared to this.

His lips continued to claim hers, his kiss deepening, more insistent and needy. The pleasure was almost unbearable. A hand moved up, about to cup her…

Without warning, he tore his mouth from hers and jerked his head up. “What the fuck am I doing?” His angry tone echoed in the empty parking lot.

Uh oh!
Her whole body tensed like she’d been doused with a bucket of Alaskan water. Adam paused, rested his forehead against hers, ragged breaths bursting in and out of his chest. A hand came up and cupped her face, a finger traced her lips. Then he pulled back and stood up, frigid air replacing the warmth of his body.

“Adam?” she whispered.

He didn’t answer, just moved away and brushed past her. Excitement exploded along her skin at the slight contact.

“Wait here,” he said, not making eye contact as he hopped over the side of the truck and onto the asphalt. “I’m going to get the Hummer. I’ll be right back.”

Then he blew out of there faster than a summer storm. Left as if nothing had happened between them, as if nothing had changed.

Rachel continued to lie there in shock for a moment, recovering from his kiss. But it had been more than that to her. It had seemed like they were in the midst of making love. She reached up and touched her kiss-swollen lips and tried to calm her racing pulse.

Hold on.

Her mouth tightened as indignant anger raced through her veins. She narrowed her eyes and banged a fist against the metal floor of the truck. This whole situation was ridiculous. There was no way he was getting away with this. He’d kissed her. Not the other way around. And he’d been as aroused as she was. There had been no mistaking the proof of that. Oh, no. That man wasn’t getting off so easy. He couldn’t just kiss and run. She deserved an explanation, even if she had to pry it out with a crowbar.

She sat up and shoved her arms inside the straps of her backpack. Adam might think she was immature and weak, but he was in for a rude awakening today. Yep. A rude awakening.

Chapter Eight

Adam stalked over to the Hummer.

He clenched his fists.
Fuck.

He’d just experienced the kiss to end all kisses, a kiss like none other—with Rachel. Rachel? The immature girl he’d vowed not to touch. Ever. He’d traveled with her for three days, spent every waking moment with her. He’d kept her safe, kept her fed and managed to keep his hands to himself. But the moment his lips had touched hers, he’d lost his ever lovin’ mind and practically fucked her in the back of a truck. How had he lost control like that?

Damn, how could he have missed that perfect ass, those curves that didn’t stop? She fit against him perfectly, like a bullet into a chamber. He groaned. Just thinking of her made his dick hard. It didn’t help that he hadn’t had sex in months. Not since before his last deployment. Christ, the moment he’d touched her, he’d acted like a starving man devouring a Thanksgiving feast.

Had she noticed his instant erection?

Well, yes, she had.

His lips tightened and he shook his head. He wasn’t ready for this. No matter how good she felt in his arms, how amazing she’d tasted as he’d kissed her, he still wasn’t going to start something with her—even if the world had ended and she was the only woman he’d seen alive. The moment they found other survivors, he needed to make sure she was linked up with others he trusted to take care of her, and when that happened, he would go. The last thing Rachel needed was a bastard like him sniffing around her heels.

There was no way in hell she’d be able to handle his kink. His last girlfriend had left him for his cousin the moment she found out the extent of his needs, letting him know she wanted nothing to do with his silly kink.
Fuck.
He’d chew Rachel up and spit her out. His eyes narrowed as he deliberately shoved all thoughts of throwing Rachel on a king-size bed out of his mind. There were a million other life-and-death matters to attend to. His dick would have to wait.

He got in the Hummer and threw the bag of guns back into its place of honor, behind the passenger seat within easy reach. He started the SUV and carefully pulled up alongside the bed of the monster truck, allowing Rachel to transfer back to safety. He stepped out to help her down, but she’d already scrambled to the ground and charged around the Hummer to the passenger door, eyes blazing, cheeks flushed.

A corner of his mouth lifted. It looked like he was in for an earful.

Regret flooded his system and a knot settled in his chest. He’d practically mauled this poor girl. Shit, he was out of control. What was it about her that caused him to lose it? At this rate, it was a matter of time before he’d have her on her knees, his cock in her mouth.

He let out a heavy sigh, got back in the Hummer and pulled out of the rest stop and back onto the freeway. He needed to leave her alone, for her own good, but his eyes devoured her every movement. She usually acted like a girl who needed protection, not like a woman who wanted to be fucked.

“What was that all about?” she asked.

He couldn’t stop grinning. She might be young and naive, but she wasn’t a pushover. He knew he scared most women with his size and his no-shit attitude, but not Rachel. She gave back as good as she got.

“Fuck if I know,” he replied.

“You kissed me.”

“Yeah, I was there, remember?” He kept his eyes on the road, navigating the Hummer through a narrow space left between two abandoned cars. He wasn’t lying, he really didn’t know why he’d kissed her when it was the last thing he should have done.

“Adam? Why did you…” Her voice drifted off. She stopped and stared at him, cocked her head to one side, and he knew she saw right through him.

Shit.

Well, after the truck incident, how couldn’t she? He couldn’t hide his shameful lust any longer. He’d wanted her the moment his gaze had connected with hers on the freeway, despite the fact he didn’t know her and the world had ended, leaving behind a ghastly mess of decaying corpses. His dick had known what it wanted, and it wanted her.

He glanced over at her. Her eyes warmed, heated. A Cheshire-cat smile spread across her face.

Fuck. She had no idea what she was getting herself into. No fucking clue. And after spending several days with her, this wasn’t just about sex anymore. He liked this girl. Liked her a lot.

He couldn’t hurt her.

Adam tugged his fingers through his hair, hated how it felt, already longer than he liked. The change put him on edge. “Look, what happened in the truck, it was a mistake—”

“A mistake?” She hesitated, looking confused. “You think kissing me was a mistake? That’s the story you’re going with?”

“It shouldn’t have happened. You’re too young. You’re only nineteen, I’m sorry—”

She put a hand up. “Don’t.” Her jaw clenched and her voice held a tight edge. “Don’t apologize. After you ran out of there as if the building were on fire, this shouldn’t be much of a shock, but…I don’t know…it is. How can you say that after how you acted a few minutes ago?”

“I shouldn’t have touched you. I said I wouldn’t. That I was leaving you alone for your own protection. It was wrong. What I did, it was wrong.”

A pained expression crossed her face. “You still think I’m some scared little girl, don’t you? Some victim you need to protect.”

He didn’t say a word.

She threw her hands up. “You do. Ugh. If only I’d kept my stupid mouth shut. Adam, we need to talk about this.”

“You were abused and you’re a virgin. And you’re only nineteen. I’m thirty-two. I’m a goddamn old man compared to you. I’m sorry if I was leading you on before, but believe me, I’m doing this for your own good.”

“Omigod, listen to yourself. That thing with my boyfriend, it happened months ago, I’ve moved on, okay? I’m not messed up. In fact, I’m damn proud that I’m not messed up anymore. I’m me. I’m fine. Well, except for the apocalypse—” she waved a hand for emphasis, “—but that would mess anyone up.”

He watched her brush waves of thick reddish hair over her shoulder. His fingers itched to touch the soft curls. Always had. From day one.

“And also,” she continued, “I’m not nineteen anymore. I’m twenty.”

He gave her a sharp glance.

“Yesterday was my birthday,” she explained.

“What the fuck,” he shouted.

“I didn’t want to tell you—”

“Why wouldn’t you tell me it was your birthday? Remember our discussion, the one where you promised to not keep important shit to yourself? That’s important shit.”

“Why did it matter? What, were you going to take me out? Get me a present? Invite anyone over? No.” She took a deep breath. “When everyone is dead and the world has ended, a birthday is just like any other dark and dreary day.”

“I could have at least told you happy birthday. I could have at least done that,” he rasped.

What the fuck.

Adam stared at the road, his fingers white knuckled on the steering wheel. He was upset that she hadn’t told him, but also shaken up to find out she wasn’t nineteen, because, for some reason twenty sounded way the fuck better than nineteen.

They were both quiet for a moment, both of them stewing over what had been revealed.

“I just don’t understand,” she finally burst out. “The way you kissed me, the way you were looking at me a moment ago—”

“Stop pushing this,” he growled. “Leave it alone. It was a mistake and it won’t happen again. There’s things about me you don’t know. It would never work between us. Trust me, we’re too different. Dammit,” he shouted, hit the brakes and banged the steering wheel.

The road was blocked. He fucking hated it when that happened. He stepped out of the car and slammed the door behind him. Rachel got out and followed. They started working in tandem, both of them used to clearing obstructions on the road. It was an hourly occurrence on any road they traveled through. This time, they were lucky there weren’t any dead bodies about, only debris from an overturned truck. They worked quietly and made quick work of the mess.

Rachel threw one of the last boxes that had littered the road into the back of the truck and turned to him. She hesitated before saying, “I know we’re different, of course we are. I mean, look at you—” she swept her hand up and down, gesturing to his whole body, “—and look at me, we’re….we’re opposites. You’re gorgeous, like the quarterback of the football team, and I’m the freshman geek girl hiding in the corner. I know that. But we’re the only two people left—”

“What the hell are you talking about?” He shook his head as they both walked back toward the Hummer. Really.
What the hell was she talking about?
“There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re beautiful, Rachel. It’s me. Not you. And we’re not the only people left.” Why did she say that? He hated how she always assumed the worst. And he hated how she put herself down. He’d heard her say that shit before, talking about herself as if she thought she were ugly. It pissed him off. “There are more survivors out there. You said yourself there were at least a hundred thousand people immune to this virus, we need to find them. It’s just a matter of time. We’ll meet other people, and you’ll find someone else, someone who’s—”

“Wait…what did you say earlier?” she interrupted, her hand touching her throat, her voice soft. “Did you say you…you…think I’m beautiful?”

“Well, yeah, shit yeah, you’re gorgeous.”

A tentative smile spread across her face, causing her eyes to sparkle bright blue. His chest started to ache.

“There are other decent survivors out there,” he said roughly, trying to stay on topic.

“But we haven’t found a single person alive since that group in Oxnard. I used to think we’d find lots of other people too. I thought we’d find groups, maybe whole communities of other survivors, but at this rate, I think we might need to drive all over the West Coast and Mexico, and we’d be lucky to find a handful of people. And maybe we won’t find anyone else at all because the survivors are clustered in Europe and we’re isolated here in North America. Anyway, even if we do find other men—” she paused, “—I’ve decided I don’t want someone else. I want you. And now I know you want me too.”

“Christ, Rachel. You’re just saying that because you’ve been stuck with my sorry ass for three days now. I know all of my faults, and there are many. You think you want me because I’m all you know. ”

She looked at him like he’d grown another head. “I know what I want, and I want you. What this all boils down to is you’re telling me you wouldn’t touch me even if I were the last woman on Earth.” She threw out a bitter laugh. “You know that’s usually a line? How screwed up is it that this time it’s actually true?”

“Fucking A. That’s
not
true.”

“If it’s not true, then the alternative is that you’re teasing me, playing mind games with me, or at the very least sending mixed messages.”

Fuck this shit. He grabbed her upper arms and hauled her in close. Her eyes widened and her head tilted back as she looked up at him. “I don’t play games,” he ground out. “I said I’d keep you safe, even from me, and I meant it. Leave it alone.”

“But you kissed me.”

“Drop it. It was a mistake. It won’t happen again.”

“Why?” she said, wide-eyed and innocent, proving again why he needed to leave her alone. “There’s just the two of us here. If I want this and you want this, what is stopping us from being together?”

“Goddammit, you don’t understand. I can’t have you.” He let go of her, forcing himself to step back. Yeah, it was the end of the world. Yeah, Rachel was the only woman he’d met so far. But there would eventually be other women, worldly women, women he could share his kink with, his life with. He had to believe that.

“Why? Why can’t you have me?” She placed a hand against his chest and looked deeply into his eyes. “Help me to understand, Adam. I don’t get it. It’s not like you were married and are mourning a loss. And there’s no one else around. We don’t have to worry about what people will say, because there’s no one left to judge. What is stopping this?”

She was good. She should have been in sales. He was about to crack and give her what she wanted. How could he pull the plug on this? He needed to make her understand the consequences of what she was doing. She needed to see what she’d be in for if she decided to take on a man like him.

“You want me? You want this?” he snarled.

“Yes,” she whispered.

“All right. Let me show you what that means.”

Then he grabbed her arms and shoved her against the side of the Hummer.

Holy crap.

Adam had her pinned, trapping her body with his. He slapped his hand on the metal above her head. She jumped, startled by this sudden, menacing change in behavior.

“You want to know why this will never work?” he asked in a dark, gravelly voice, his lips stroking her earlobe. She gave him a jerky nod. Her whole body seemed to melt as warmth rushed between her thighs.

“If you push this,” Adam continued, “if you want more, you need to know what you’re getting into if you choose to be in my bed. This is who I am. You’ve got to know my expectations up front.”

Her knees weakened. “Wh…what expectations?”

He threaded his fingers through her hair, tightened his hand and jerked her head back, forcing her to look directly into his dark, probing eyes. Okay, that was a little scary. Despite her fear, her whole body seemed to melt. She watched his face turn hard. She trembled in his arms. Now she was beginning to understand what he’d been trying to tell her. He really
had
been holding back this whole time, hadn’t he? Trying to hide this part of himself, trying not to scare her.

Oh shit.

“I expect any woman I fuck to be ready for my directions,” he declared. Her breath hitched at his harsh tone. “I might want your mouth, your pussy or your ass, anytime, any day, and you’ll say
yes
. I call the shots. And sometimes I like it rough. I wouldn’t hurt you, but that doesn’t mean I would always be gentle when I’m fucking your pussy. And I might require you to take on another man’s dick while I watch. I’m not sure if that will happen, depends upon the men we meet in this new world. I’d never share you with someone I didn’t trust. And I would call the shots.” He placed his hand between her legs, cupped her mound. “Because this pussy would be mine, and I would decide what happens with it. Is this what you want, Rachel? If the answer is no, if you can’t handle this, you’d better back off right now.”