Authors: Angela McPherson
When class ended, I checked my phone for any missed calls.
Only one. Elle. She
'
d left me a voice message. When I realized she
'
d made plans
with Green for Thanksgiving, I couldn't be around her. How much longer would
she leave me hanging?
"Class, have a good week,"
Mrs. Powers
said.
I grabbed my stuff and walked outside. It was fucking
freezing, and I
'
d forgotten to grab a jacket, and jogged most of the way.
Once inside, I started my car, cranked up the heater, and waited until she
warmed up.
I stared at my phone, contemplating if I should hear what she
had to say when I got a text from Bret.
Meet
at the house. Party in an hour.
I didn
'
t think about my answer.
Be there in five
.
I
'
d gone a miserable week without any form of communication
with Elle. More than likely, I wouldn
'
t be interested to hear what she
had to say, so I decided what the fuck, and held off until later. I shifted my
car into gear and drove off. The prospect of an alcohol-induced coma for the
evening sounded promising.
Hardly anyone was there when I walked in, so I headed to the
kitchen. Jarred and Bret were getting shots ready. I smiled.
"Need some help with those?"
"Nah, get the music going." Jarred turned and
smacked Bret in the back of the head when he took a shot.
"Dude, what the fuck? I was making sure we had the right
mix."
Bret f
rowned.
"We didn
'
t mix anything, dip shit."
Bret smiled. "Oh, right."
I laughed
on my way to the living room. I hooked up the iPod and hit
play.
"It's been a while." Slowly I turned to find Kellie
standing in front of me.
"I guess so." I folded my arms across my chest,
wondering what she wanted. "How
'
ve you been?"
"Pretty good, actually," she said, then bit her
thumbnail.
"That's
good.
"
She smiled back, relaxing her expression. "
Thanks.
Listen, I wanted
to apologize for what I said when we broke up." Kellie hesitated. "I
really do want you to be happy, Tristan."
That was not what I
'
d expected her to say. Ever.
"Um, thanks."
Kellie gave me a dimpled smile.
Bret yelled from the kitchen, "Daniels, get your ass in
here."
"Good to see you."
"Yeah, you too."
"Daniels?" Bret yelled again.
"Coming, dickhead."
Kellie smiled and walked away. In the kitchen, Bret held a
shot in each hand. I knew I liked him.
"What is it?" I looked at the amber liquid.
"The good stuff," he said, handing me my shot.
"
Cheers,
" I said, clinking our double shot filled glasses
together. The liquor burned hotter than usual going down. I was long overdue
for a night of drinking.
"Another?"
I pour
ed myself a
refill. Bret agreed and we downed two more before joining the small crowd
gathering in the living room.
A cute blonde walked up to me. "Tristan, I watched you
play last weekend. You were so great."
"
Thanks.
" I smiled back at her and the friend next to her.
"Daniels, you up for a rematch?" Jarred stood by
the stairs holding a pool stick.
"Sure," I agreed. The girls frowned. "See ya
around." They squealed.
Upstairs Jarred racked while I got my stick ready. I hadn
'
t thought about
Elle the entire time I
'
d been there, which was a welcomed change.
"You break," I said.
He did, but didn
'
t make any shots in.
"Pussy." I laughed. I walked around the table to
score a few easy shots. "Red ball, corner pocket." I leaned over,
slammed the cue ball, and watched my ball fall into the pocket.
"Lucky shot," Jarred said.
"Whatever, man." I chalked the end and called my
next shot. "Two ball, side pocket." Slammed it. Then I had an idea.
"
Whoever doesn
'
t make their shot, drinks." I looked up at Jarred.
"Deal."
"All right. Seven ball, side pocket." I leaned over
and lined up my shot.
"Don
't choke.
" I heard, mid-swing, and missed my target. "I said
not to choke," Elle repeated.
I looked up to make sure she was really there. She smiled
back at me.
"Drink up, man," Jarred ordered.
"Fine," I grumbled, taking a long swig of beer.
Elle walked over next to me, biting her bottom lip. I couldn't help but stare.
I downed half my drink.
"I left you a voicemail today." She frowned, and so
help me because all I could think about was sucking on her bottom lip… and
maybe a few other places.
"I
'
ve been busy. Guess I didn
'
t get it."
Yeah, I was being a dick, but I couldn't handle her tonight.
"Elle, you want anything to drink?" Green looked at
her, which I took as my cue to walk away.
"Water would be good. Thanks."
I remained close to the table, refusing to look in her
direction. Jarred missed his last shot.
"Drink up," I said, scanning the table for my next
shot.
"I need a refill," he said. "Be right back
with another round."
He left me alone. With Elle. I moved around the table once
more. There were a few easy shots on the other side of the table, but that
would've meant I
'
d have to stand in close proximity to her. Keeping my
distance, I chose the bank shot. Lucky for me, I made it.
"Are you going to ignore me all night?" I felt her
warm breath on the back of my neck.
"I
'
m in the middle of a game."
A long sigh escaped her. I almost turned around.
"Here you go," Green said. I changed my mind.
I took another shot and made my intended pocket. By the time
Jarred returned, I had only one shot left. All I needed was the eight ball and
I could get the fuck out of there.
"Damn, you didn
'
t cheat?
"
I only shook my head, and then leaned over to line up the
hit, an easy corner pocket. I reared back, and struck my target with perfect
aim. The cue ball spun on the table as soon as it reached the eight ball.
"You okay, man?" Jarred stepped back, looking at me
questionably.
"Yeah, I
'
m great." I grabbed my fresh beer and gulped half the
contents down.
"My turn. I play the winner," Elle said. I pulled
the bottle away from my lips, glaring at her from the top.
"I
'
m not interested in playing with you. To be honest, I think I
'
m done.
" I could
see the instant hurt in her green eyes, and turned away. I couldn't do this
anymore. Seeing her with someone else fucking killed me.
"
Chicken,
" she said, her voice laced with anger and pain.
"
Nope. Just done,
" I snapped, and walked away.
Elle
Tears swam in my eyes, and my hands trembled as I watched
Tristan walk away. What did he mean by done?
I sucked in a few deep, unsteady breaths, careful to hide my
pain before I turned to face Eric. When I did, the usual intensity emanating
from his eyes dimmed while he searched my face with confusion and worry. God
help me, because I didn
'
t care. All I could think about were Tristan
'
s words. I had
to talk to him.
"
Hey. Um, I
'
m not really sure what
'
s going on with Tristan. I
'
m going to find
out what
'
s wrong. Okay?" I barely managed to muster the energy to
form a smile.
“You’re gonna run to him? Just like that?" Eric turned
to Jarred. "I
'
ll rack
‘em," he said, voice hard. With his back still turned,
he finished, “Just go, Elle."
I rushed down the stairs, desperate to find Tristan before he
left. As usual, the damn place was packed with people. In the living room, I
found Alyssa dancing with Bret and hurried over.
"Hey, Alyssa. Have you seen Tristan?" I was frantic
but she didn
'
t seem to care or notice.
"
Yeah, kitchen,
" she said, running her fingers through Bret
'
s hair.
"
Thanks.
" I swung around and headed there. I walked slowly,
trying to calm the high range of emotions stirring within. To be honest, I was
afraid the moment I found him, I
'
d burst into tears.
I stood in front of the swinging door to the kitchen. A few
people walked out as I hesitantly went in. Inside, I found Tristan standing in
front of the sink, hands gripping the counter with his head bowed down.
Suddenly my voice vanished, stuck somewhere between my stomach and throat,
refusing to cooperate.
"Fuck," he shouted, before turning around. His eyes
widened with shock.
My heart thudded so loudly I was sure he could hear the
beats, or at the very least, see its pulse hammering against my chest.
"What do you want, Elle?" His voice remained hard
and his eyes darkened.
I tried to hold back my tears, but failed. As much as I hated
him calling me by his stupid nickname, I hated the way he said Elle even more.
Blinking, more tears fell, but still I couldn't speak. Seeing
the way Tristan looked at me, as if he really did hate me, shattered me. We
watched each other for long minute, neither one of us breaking eye contact. So
many unspoken words passed between us. Tristan broke away first, closing his
eyes, he bowed his head again.
"
Goddammit, Elle
!"
I jumped, and more tears escaped, rolling down my heated cheeks.
Tristan looked up, his expression changed from anger to sorrow. I stood
grounded in place, afraid if I moved I
'
d completely lose it.
Tristan took a few steps forward, his eyes holding mine. I
felt like my heart bled. When he finally stood directly in front of me, I could
barely see his figure from the waterworks.
"Don
'
t cry." Reaching up, he wiped the wetness away.
"Tristan," I said on a broken sob.
He instantly pulled me to him, holding me firmly against his
chest. I fisted his shirt in my hands, my shoulders relaxed.
"Please don
't leave me,
" I said, finally able to speak somewhat clearly.
Tristan didn
'
t say anything for several minutes.
"I
'
m not going anywhere. I can
'
t–" He
paused, releasing a long whoosh of air. "I love you too much." His
voice cracked in the end.
As much as hearing him say he loved me brought me joy, the
words also caused an inexplicable amount of pain. I
'
d hurt him. Me
being with Eric was hard for him, but he still chose to stay. Waiting. I didn
'
t know how much
longer I could do this to him. I loved Tristan, but my fear stood in the way of
what could be. What would happen if I allowed myself to fall, completely? Ever
since he admitted how he felt, that question played on repeat in my mind.
I heard laughter and loud voices drift into the kitchen and
tensed. He gripped me tighter. Allowing him to hold me, comfort me, was wrong,
but I wasn
'
t strong enough to pull away.
Leaning down, Tristan whispered in my ear. "Let
'
s go." I
didn't even pause to think. I agreed with a nod and followed him to the closest
room we found. A bathroom. Nice.
Tristan locked the door and then turned around. Seeing the
agony I'd caused him crushed me. I turned my gaze away.
"Look at me," he said, lifting my chin. I raised my
eyes to meet his. Standing so close, his familiar smell engulfed the cramped
space. Tristan cupped my face in his hands, looking deeply into my eyes.