Divine Vices (23 page)

I
bolted back through the alleyway, feeling like the most ridiculous, meddlesome
little busybody I had ever the displeasure of knowing.

“What
did you see?” called out Gwen, racing after me as I charged across the street
back to the car.

“What
do you think? It’s an A.A. meeting,” I said, climbing behind the wheel. “And
Jack’s a volunteer there.”

“What?”

“Yeah!”
I turned over the engine as she got into the passenger seat.

“Why
would he be volunteering there?”

“Because
he’s a serial killer. That’s just what they do, right?” I said, tearing out of
there as fast as I could. “Gwen, he’s just being a decent person.”

“You
don’t know that for sure.”

“So
what you’re saying is that he’s a killer, masquerading as a bad boy, pretending
to be a secret do-gooder?” I inquired. “Either he overthinks things as much as
you do, or he’s just a normal guy with a sensitive side he doesn’t like to
expose. Guess which one I’m going to side with here?”

“You’ve
fallen for him, haven’t you?!”

“What?
No!”

“Yes,
you have! You’ve got that whole Stockholm thing!”

“Gwen,
that’s for kidnapping victims.”

“Same
idea nevertheless. It’s still about over-dominating personalities using the
sensitivities of their prey against themselves, and now he’s got you thinking
that not only is he not a potential killer, but that he’s actually a nice guy!”

“You
know, he really isn’t as terrible as you want to believe he is.”

“Example?”
Gwen demanded. “What on earth did he say to you during those tutoring sessions?
He put you under hypnosis or something?”

“No,
he just showed me that there’s more to him than what meets the eye.”

“Like?”

I
know I really shouldn’t have kept going down this road, but it was Gwen who
turned us onto it in the first place. And she was insistent to stay the course.
“Okay, but if I tell you, you have to promise that you won’t speak of it to
anyone else. Deal?”

“Fine.
Spill.”

“Meyer,
I’m serious. You can’t say anything.”

“Pinky
swear. I’ll take it to my grave if I have to.”

“He’s
dyslexic.”

She
out-and-out gasped. “I knew it!”

“You
knew it?”

“He’s
totally played on your sympathy! I’m telling you, Stockholm! Jack has you
thinking he’s really just some misunderstood, struggling rebel from the wrong
side of the tracks-”

“That’s
not at all what I think,” I countered. “And thank you for the confidence, by
the way. Good to know you have faith in my reasoning skills. I’m not
that
naïve!”

“Oh,
come on. It’s a total play on egos here. He’s everything that a girl like you
craves!”

I
laughed loudly over her words, hoping that I could convince myself of my own
disbelief in her statement.

“Admit
it! What woman doesn’t secretly fantasize about a gorgeous rebel who promises
danger, excitement, and thrills? You’ve lived your whole life by the rules and
order and he threatens that logic, which at least intrigues you. Not to
mention, you’ve got this whole rescuer’s syndrome.”

“Rescuer’s
syndrome?”

“Every
good girl who’s afflicted with a case of the ‘bad boy’ has this condition. She
believes that he’s capable of better, and she swears that
she’ll
be the
one to save him from himself and the error of his ways.”

“You
really need to lay off the Cosmopolitan articles.”

“Tell
me I’m wrong.”

I
pinched the grip of the steering wheel under my nails. “Fine, you’re not wholly
wrong, but that doesn’t mean I’m about to dismiss all commonsense to fall head
over heels onto his mattress. Relationships like that never last, and I’m not
about to take the gamble on someone whose past is shrouded with lethal
secrets,” I said.

There
were still a handful of cars in the parking lot when I pulled up to the school
after Gwen and I grabbed a bite to eat. I dropped her off by the Saturn and bid
her a good evening. Heading back out onto Main Street, I rode through the
constant congestion until I finally reached the Rockhouse.

“You
call for a ride?” I shouted out, stepping through the back door.

“Hey,
Cass,” greeted my dad. “You mind waiting a few minutes? I’ve just gotta finish
up.”

“No
problem. I’ll be out back.”

I
climbed down the stairs and made my way over to the Buick. The air was cool and
calm, and only the sound of my boots clacking on the asphalt proved to me that
I still had my hearing. So when a hand silently grabbed hold of my shoulder
from behind, I shrieked as I whirled around.

“Jesus!”
I shouted, realizing it was Jack. “Good Lord, you scared the life out of me!
What’re you doing out here?”

He
didn’t say anything. He simply stared down at me in the sternest of fashion.

“What’s
wrong?”

“Why
were you talking to Rachel Haggerty?” he said, his tone sorely gruff.

Every
muscle in my body tightened. “I’m-I’m sorry?”

“Don’t
play dumb, Cassie. I got a call from an old friend of mine back in Arlington,
telling me about two girls who happened to be snooping around and asking
questions concerning me. Funny thing is, he said their names were Trish and
Minnie, yet described them as a pretty black-haired girl and a redheaded
agent-Barbie. Sound familiar?”

“Jack,
I can explain-”

“Well,
I’m all ears.”

His
voice was still unwaveringly harsh, and it made it all the more difficult for
me to find the right words. Where was I going to start? Suspecting him of
kidnapping? Murder? The fact that I pried into his past?

“It’s
curious, isn’t it? You always talk about respecting people’s boundaries, yet
you seem to have no problem committing the offense that upsets you most in
others,” he snarled.

“Gwen
found an article,” I finally muttered, pulling out and unfolding the paper I
had tucked in the pocket of my pants. I handed it over to him. “I’m sorry, but
the coincidence was a bit too much for Gwen to brush off.”

“And
she roped you into it, did she? Forced you to tag along?”

“No,
I went based on my own curiosity.”

“And
did you uncover anything groundbreaking? Perhaps find me on camera buying duct
tape and a shovel?”

“...
No, it’s just that... no one would talk about what really happened with you. No
one would explain why the cops let you go. So we thought it wouldn’t hurt to
take a look for ourselves.”

He
was actually scaring me. Every step he took towards me, I retracted to keep our
distance equal.

“But
you still suspect me?”

“No,
I just...”

“You
what? You just needed an excuse to push me away?” He stepped closer and I
suddenly found myself pinned up against the side of a car with no place left
behind me to go. “Well, congratulations, Cassandra. It’s your lucky day.” He
pulled out a piece of paper and pinned it to my chest.

It
was a copy of a newspaper article, dated from October 12th of last year.

“The
funeral service for Benjamin Phillip Matthews was held Sunday afternoon in the
presence of friends and family, with the exception of his only son, Jack, who
has been in a coma since October 3rd following the crash that claimed his
father’s life. After the football game against Richmond, the Matthews’ jeep was
broadsided in the intersection of Porter and Third when a drunk driver blew
right through a red light, crashing into them at an estimated fifty miles an
hour. Benjamin was pronounced dead on the scene and his son, quarterback for
the Cougars, was rushed to St. Joseph’s Hospital in critical condition...”

It
all made sense. Why he didn’t play football again. Why he was relieved of
suspicion.

“Apparently,
a little more investigative work would have been helpful,” he said, backing
off. “Because simple math would have told you that it was physically impossible
for me to have done any of this, given the fact that the last two girls
disappeared while I wasn’t even conscious.”

I
felt gutted. “Jack... I’m-”

“Save
it,” he snarled. “You profess of loyalty and trust. Yet, one cannot be achieved
without the other. And you, Cassie, have neither. You don’t trust anyone. You
simply wait contentedly for the opportunity to walk away. And for someone who
requires loyalty, you really aren’t an honest person either. Are you?”

“What
are you talking about?”

“Tell
me, how is it that a perfect, straight-A student nearly gets expelled after
having the police called on her?”

I
had just been hammered by a freight train.

“Where
did you hear that?” I whimpered.

“Not
so nice, is it? Having all your dirty, little secrets exposed? Seems we both
have some tainted pasts before we moved to town. The difference is though, I
didn’t judge you for yours.”

“How
did you find that out?!” I growled as tears began to form.

He
didn’t say anything else. He simply turned and left the lot, leaving me to fall
in the abyss of emotions that I thought I had long put behind me.

“You
up for Grayson’s Halloween bash tonight?” asked Ian, slinking up behind me as I
dialed in my locker combo.

Thankfully,
the weekend had given me a break from having to speak with Jack, and I had even
managed to make it to that next Wednesday morning, yet I still felt as wrenched
by the incident as the night we exchanged words.

“As
if I have a choice,” I said, unlatching the door. “Gwen’s gonna have a
conniption though. I didn’t bother looking for a costume. And I’m not going in
my one from last year.”

“Appears
someone here knows you better than that.” Ian swung a black shopping bag in
front of my face.

“Do
I even want to know what’s in this?” I asked, taking hold of it.

“Don’t
worry. Gwen had nothing to do with it. This one’s on me,” he said. “I had a
feeling you’d try to bail.”

I
chuckled. “It’s a little scary just how well you know me.”

“Everyone
needs a good scare every now and again.”

“Well,
I’ve had too many of them as of late,” I said, putting the bag into my locker
and closing it, “but your scares are always more than welcome. Thank you.”

“No
problem,” he said, kissing me on the cheek. “I’ll see you after class?”

“Yep.”

Ian
and I parted ways and I started heading towards English when I saw Jack coming
towards me from a connecting hall. I avoided eye contact and charged past him
without giving acknowledgement even after he called out my name. I kept
walking, and actually picked up the pace a bit.

“Hey!”
Jack’s riding boots trotted up from behind, yet I still didn’t waver. “Can we
talk?”

His
hand suddenly took hold of my upper arm, and the action forced me to stop as I
ripped it free from his hold. “Can we talk?”

Nothing.
I had no words for him. I simply, but firmly, turned and started walking away
again.

He
scoffed. “You know, if anybody should be pissed here, it’s me. What the hell’s
the matter with you?”

I
whizzed around and to both our surprises, I slapped him. “Stay the hell away
from me.”

He
stood awestruck and speechless by my reaction as everyone else in the hall
gasped and started making wisecracks. I didn’t bother staying around to hear
any of them though. I hastened away, and when I heard Jack rushing up behind me
again, I ducked into the women’s bathroom.

I
dropped my book bag on the floor by the sink and ducked into a stall.

“Cassie,
get out here,” ordered Jack as he entered, seeing my absence at the counter.

“For
the love of God!” I barked, punching the stall door open and charging out. “Why
can’t you just leave me alone?!”

“What
the hell was that back there?” he said, checking out his cheek in the mirror.

“You’ve
got a lot of nerve!”

“You’re
kidding, right?”

“No,
I am NOT.” I got right up in front of him. “Anything I did in regard to you was
never
done with the intention to hurt you. I needed answers for my own
reassurance, and that was all. What you dug up on me was out of pure
malevolence. And I’m not even going to get into the fact that those records
were sealed.”

I
pushed past him, but he stuck his hand out against the door and I couldn’t pry
it open.

“What
happened?”

“You
already know,” I sneered.

“No,
I don’t think I do. If I did, I’d like to think I’d be able to understand your
response here a bit better.”

He
was wholly serious, and I had had all I could take of this.

“Fine,
you really want to know?” I said, turning to look him right in the eyes. “It
happened back in January. It was after dark. I had gotten into a fight with my
mother, and I snuck out of the apartment to hang with one of my friends in the
school parking lot. We had been there for about a half hour, just talking.
Suddenly, a cop car came barreling in, and my friend panicked. She apparently
had marijuana on her, and she tossed it over the fence right by where we were
parked. The officer saw it, but he couldn't tell which one of us did it.
Someone had tipped him off that one of us was carrying, and he found the stash.
We were both brought in on suspicion of possession, and since my
supposed
friend
already had one mark on her record for it, she told the cops it was mine. They
couldn’t prove anything for certain, but when the school got wind of this
happening on their property they threatened to expel us. Given the
circumstances that followed, I wound up not getting punished for any of it. In
the end, I stopped hanging out with any of my so-called friends. They proved to
be just as fickle as the girl who tried to lay the blame on me; hence my
relocating here.”

“This
happened in January?”

“Yeah.”
I couldn’t fight the tears anymore.

“Cassie,
what happened?”

“That
night... there was a carbon monoxide leak in my apartment. The detectors
somehow failed,” I muttered weakly. “That’s how my mom and sister died.”

His
hand slid off the door.

“If
I hadn’t gotten into an argument with my mother, I would have been in there
when it happened. But I also can’t help but think that if none of the bullshit
that took place with the cops had happened, I would have made it back there in
time. I could have saved them,” I whispered.

Jack
backed away.

“Now
you know. Satisfied?” I pulled the door open and left him, but I wasn’t in any
particular hurry to get to class despite the fact that the tardy bell sounded
overhead.

When
I walked late into English with my cheeks painted in wet streaks, Miss Tipton
gave me one look and motioned for me to take a seat without reproof. She
granted Jack the same freebee as he entered a moment later.

“Before
we get started with today’s lesson plan, I’m happy to report that I have the
results to everyone’s career aptitude tests you took a little while back,” said
Miss Tipton, walking up and down the rows and handing out each form to its
owner.

I
looked over the paper for about half a minute before tossing it inside my
binder, still reading over the answers now burnt into my memory. I found my
thoughts straying away from
Jane Eyre
and more towards that sheet of
paper. After a fuzzy hour and a half of gabbing and in-depth discussions, I
fled the classroom the moment the dismissal bell sounded.

“Hey,
hold up there, Roadrunner!” called out a voice from behind.

I
spun around with relief to see Ian heading down the hall in my direction.

“Where
are you off to in such a hurry?”

“Far
away as possible,” I said exhaustedly. “You get your aptitude test back?”

“Yep.”

“And?”

“Inconclusive.”

“That’s
what it said?”

“No,
but I know they’re wrong, so my career possibilities are still ongoing. What’s
with the long face?”

I
shrugged.

“Jack?”

“Everything.”

“You
wanna talk?”

“I
don’t think it’s gonna do any good.”

“Well,
at least give it a try.”

“Okay,”
I sighed. “I feel like a world-class jackass for how I handled things with
Jack, yet I’m now totally disgusted with him for what he did to me. Then I get
this stupid piece of paper.”

I
yanked the aptitude results out of my binder and tossed it to him.

“Says
you’re best suited for a career in criminal justice. Is that a problem?”

“I
don’t know. That’s the problem.”

“You’re
gonna have to explain this one to me.”

“Call
it a premature midlife crisis,” I said. “You know, what’s life? Why am I here?
Why does high school suck? The usual.”

“Well,
what would you say if I told you that I had a remedy for that?”

“You
found life’s eternal happiness?”

“Yep,
in the frozen goods section of the Mega Mart,” he chuckled. “Seriously though,
I’ve got something that we can do that’ll take your mind off things. But, wait,
what did Jack just do to you?”

“I’ll
tell you about it later.”