Doctor Who: The Celestial Toymaker (9 page)

Meanwhile Mrs Wiggs was busy at the
table making pastry and keeping an eye on this exchange with growing
disfavour. 'You watch what you do with my dresser,' she said a little
jealously.

Disregarding her, Dodo opened a drawer
and started rummaging around the knives and forks inside. The
Sergeant opened another and started throwing tablecloths and cloth
napkins out on the floor.

Steven, meanwhile, took a chair over,
stood on it and started examining the inside of a large cuckoo clock,
just as it struck. The cuckoo came out and narrowly missed hitting
him on the nose. Steven fell back off the chair.

'Are you all right?' called Dodo. Then
as Steven started getting to his feet, Dodo couldn't
resist laughing, as she always did at Steven's mishaps. He always
looked so comically protective of his dignity.

"ere, what do you thinks this
place is, a bloomin' fairground?' Mrs Wiggs was outraged as she saw
Sergeant Rugg empty out another drawer of linen. 'You put all of that
back in the drawer, just as it was!'

The Sergeant turned back and stood to
attention. 'Just 'elping the young lady, Mrs Wiggs.' He turned back
to Dodo. 'What's your name m'gel?'

Dodo flashed him a smile. 'Dodo,' she
said. 'Dodo,' said the Sergeant. 'What a lovely name. Dodo. I like
that, I do.'

'Well,' said Mrs Wiggs crossly, 'go and
like it somewhere else and take your friends with you.'

The Sergeant turned back towards the
cook a little patronisingly. 'Come now, Mrs Wiggs. The young gel's
gone and been and lost her key, ain't she?'

'Well,' said Mrs Wiggs, 'she won't find
it 'ere.' She grabbed the rolling pin and started rolling up her
sleeves.

Steven looked at Dodo and shrugged.
'Take no notice of it, Dodo. She's sent by the Toymaker to put us
off. It's a sign we're getting warm.'

He started to crawl under the table to
see if the key was there. Getting angry and more red in the face than
ever, Mrs Wigg looked from Steven to Dodo, but as neither of them
seemed to be taking the slightest notice of her, she put down her
roller and went back to her pastry board and started preparing a pie
for the oven.

Dodo walked over to one of the
cupboards on the dresser and looked inside. She saw a collection of
Victorian china: a cow creamer, a swan-shaped butter dish, a china
cheese cover made in the shape of a cottage and a stack of dessert
plates with Victorian nursery rhymes painted on the rims. She started
to search among the china for the key.

By the table Mrs Wiggs suddenly gave a
little scream, drew back and looked under. 'Ey,' she said to Steven,
'that was my foot you got hold of. Come out from under there!'

Steven crawled out from under the
table. He looked over at Dodo and shook his head. 'It's not under
there,' he said. 'Any luck?'

Dodo finished examining the china,
turned back and closed the cupboard. 'No,' she said. 'I'll look among
the plates up there,' she said, nodding up to the shelves at the top
of the dresser. She turned and started dragging her chair over.

'Now don't you get up there, m'gel,'
said the Sergeant. 'You'll fall down and break a leg. Here, let me
look for you.'

Dodo, touched by this unexpected
courtesy and warming to being treated like a woman at last, said,
'It's very kind of you.'

The Sergeant climbed up on the chair.
'Not at all, ma'am,' he said. He wavered for a moment and nearly
fell.

Mrs Wiggs glared up at him. 'What do
you think you're doing up there, Sergeant.?'

'Now,' said the Sergeant. 'Don't you
fret, cookie,' he said. He swayed alarmingly and grabbed the shelf
for balance. 'I'll be all right.'

'I'm not worried about you,' said Mrs
Wiggs. 'It's my china.' As she spoke, the Sergeant pulled a plate out
to look behind it. It fell down to the floor and broke. Mrs Wiggs
gave a little scream. 'Me best plates! Come down at once!'

'Only a little accident, Mrs Wiggs,'
said the Sergeant with dignity.

Mrs Wiggs put her hands on her hips and
glared up at him. 'Accident!' she said. 'That was no accident,
Sergeant. You threw that plate down deliberate like!'

The Sergeant's face grew solemn. 'I
hope as you're not calling me a liar, Mrs Wiggs!' Another plate came
crashing down on the floor.

'That,' said Mrs Wiggs ironically, 'was
another accident, I suppose.'

The Sergeant changed hands and a few
more plates came down. Dodo looked from one to the other, nervous at
having started a fight between them. 'Perhaps you'd better come down.
Sergeant?' she suggested.

'Not at all, gel, I'm perfectly all
right.' Three more plates cascaded down. The kitchen boy began to
stir.

'I'm warnin' you, Sergeant Rugg, come
down here this instant!' ordered Mrs Wiggs.

The Sergeant's back became ever more
ram-rod straight. 'Soldiers don't take orders from civilians, Cook.
Now you just pipe down.'

This was the final straw as far as Mrs
Wiggs was concerned. 'Pipe down yourself, you great lump!' she said
furiously. 'Call yourself a soldier! You'd run away from a pussy
cat!'

The Sergeant glared back at her. 'You
didn't ought to have said that, Cook.' He deliberately scooped off
three more plates, one of them hitting the kitchen boy on the head as
it fell. Coming awake with a start, the boy dived below the table.

'You clumsy brute,' said Mrs Wiggs.

'Please, please,' said Dodo very
distressed by what was going on. 'Stop, it's all my fault.'

Steven turned back from examining the
big copper boiler in the corner. 'Ignore them,' he said. 'It's being
done to prevent us from finding the key. They don't exist, remember -
it's not real.' Just then, a plate flung by the Sergeant hit him on
the head. 'Oww!' he called.

Dodo pulled him back out of the firing
line. 'Are you sure about that?' she questioned.

Steven rubbed his head. 'That certainly
felt real enough,' he said. 'Do you suppose there is a key? We've
looked everywhere, haven't we? We looked around the kitchen.'

By now a fusilade of missiles was
flying back and forth across the kitchen, with Mrs Wiggs picking up
the pastry she had been working on and flinging it at the Sergeant
who, in turn, was bombarding her with plates. The once orderly
kitchen was now a mess of broken crockery, flour and pastry.

Taking advantage of the cook's
distraction, the kitchen boy reached up and grabbed a jar of sultanas
and then starting eating under the table.

'Oh please, stop, stop!' cried Dodo.
'You've thrown everything there is to throw. Can't you both call a
truce?'

'Not everything!' Mrs Wiggs picked up a
bag of flour and threw it. It burst like a bomb on the Sergeant's
shoulder covering him with white powder. 'He's broken all of me best
china!' said Mrs Wiggs.

'I'm sure he'll apologise,' said Dodo.

The Sergeant shook his head and started
brushing the flour off. 'Soldiers never apologise,' he said.

Dodo went over to him and, taking a
whisk, began to
help him brush the white flour from his
red uniform. 'But a gentleman would always apologise to a lady,' she
said.

'Garn,' came the voice of Mrs Wiggs
behind them. 'Who told ya soldiers were gentlemen?'

'Sergeant Rugg is,' said Dodo. 'I'm
sure of that.'

The Sergeant stiffened again, and after
a pause turned around and bowed to the cook as she climbed off her
chair. 'I apologise,' he said.

Dodo turned back to Mrs Wiggs. 'Now
will you accept his apology?'

Mrs Wiggs scowled sulkily for a moment
and then said, 'Well, all right, but he'll have to pay for me china.'

'Hmm?' the Sergeant reddened again.
'Pay for the china?' He turned to Dodo. 'You see now why soldiers
never apologise? Give the old trout an inch and -'

'Old trout V Mrs Wiggs picked up a
broom beside the stove and started after the Sergeant who backed away
around the table.

'Now Mrs Wiggs,' he said, 'put that
down!'

Mrs Wiggs swept the broom at his legs
and as he jumped back, Cyril got it on the head. Crawling out from
under the kitchen table still clutching the sultanas, Cyril made for
the far wall and crept along it heading for the safety of the walk-in
pantry.

Steven followed him with his eyes.
'Hey!' he called to him. 'Just a minute, where do you think you're
going.'

The kitchen boy put his tongue out.
'Mind your own business,' he said.

With sudden intuition, Steven strode
across to him. 'I think you know where the key is.' Behind them, the
cook had the Sergeant bottled in the corner of the room and was belabouring him with the broom
despite Dodo's efforts to stop her.

The kitchen boy slowly extended the jar
of sultanas towards Steven who took them. 'Now we're getting
somewhere.' He put his hand in the jar, feeling around through the
sultanas, but there was no key. He tried again - same result.
Finally, he dumped them on the floor in disgust.

Meanwhile, the kitchen boy had reached
the safety of the pantry. As Steven turned back to him, he slipped
inside and shut the door. 'Hey, come out of there.' Steven ran to the
door of the pantry and shook it, but the boy had managed to lock
himself inside.

'Please don't,' Dodo said to the cook.
'I'm sure you'll hurt him with that broom.'

The Sergeant moved around to the other
side of the table out of range and picked up the pie Mrs Wiggs was
preparing for the cupboard. 'If she does, this pie gets hurt as
well,' he threatened.

'Put me pie down!' said Mrs Wiggs
demandingly.

'Put that broom down then!' cried the
Sergeant. Mrs Wiggs made a sudden dash around the table, sweeping the
broom at the Sergeant's legs. He jumped up on one of the kitchen
chairs, holding the pie high above his head.

With a sudden flash of intuition, Dodo
turned and clutched Steven's arm. 'Steven,' she said. 'That's the
only place we haven't looked!'

'Where?' said Steven.

'The pie,' said Dodo.

'I see what you mean.' Steven picked up
the second broom and went to the other end of the table.

He turned to Mrs Wiggs. 'I'll help
you,' he said. 'I'll swipe him from behind.'

The Sergeant turned around in alarm,
looking at this new enemy that appeared. 'Not you too!' he said.

As Mrs Wiggs swung her broom at him
from the front, the Sergeant jumped back and Steven, swinging from
the rear, knocked the pie out of his hands. It landed on the floor
beside Dodo.

Dodo quickly picked the pie up and
ripped the crust off. There inside was a large Victorian key. She
showed it to Steven.

'I've got it! This must be the key.'

Steven ran over and grabbed it from
her. 'Right,' he said. 'Quick, Dodo.' He ran to the door followed by
Dodo and thrust the key in the lock. The door creaked open and as it
did so, they could hear the sound of waltz music.

Dodo turned around. 'Thank you,
Sergeant,' she said. 'You really are a true gentleman.' She turned to
Mrs Wiggs. 'And sorry about your kitchen,' she said.

With the finding of the key, the
Sergeant and Mrs Wiggs had stopped fighting and stood looking at
them.

Steven and Dodo disappeared. In their
place there slowly materialised the tall dark form of the Toymaker.

He turned around to the Sergeant and
the Cook who cowered away from him. 'Wretched pair,' he said. 'I give
you a chance for freedom and this is all you can do with it. Look at
the kitchen.'

The Sergeant came to attention and
saluted. 'It's my fault,' said the Sergeant gallantly. 'Not hers.'

The Toymaker sneered at him. 'Such
gallantry,' he said. 'From a mere doll! And listen to me both of you.

Tidy yourselves up and get out on that
dance floor. At the far end is the TARDIS. Steven and Dodo must be
prevented from getting to it at all costs. Do you understand? Fail me
and I'll break you like these plates.' The Toymaker turned, lifted
the remaining plate off the dresser and smashed it on the table.

Frightened, the Sergeant and the cook
nodded and started brushing their clothes, preparing for the dance.

8 The Ballroom

Steven and Dodo stepped out into a room
that was in complete contrast to the two previous ones. This room was
decorated as an old-fashioned ballroom. A huge chandelier slowly
turned, flashing vari-coloured lights across a triangular dance floor
of beautifully polished parquet wood. The music was gentle and
soothing: old time waltzes, quick steps and fox trots. On the dance
floor, three ballerina dolls, one male and two females, were doing a
slow graceful dance number. Dodo and Steven stopped to watch.

The dance ended, the dolls took their
bows to Dodo's applause, and then relapsed stiffly to a
mannequin-like position. Steven, who had been watching the dancing a
little impatiently, moved forward to step on the wooden dance floor
but Dodo stopped him.

'Be careful,' she said. 'It may be
dangerous - like the chairs.'

'There's no other way to get to the
TARDIS,' said Steven.

Dodo shook her head. 'Remember what
we've been through. It can't be that simple, can it? There must be a
catch to it somewhere.' She went on to quote the riddle. 'Then escape
the rhythmic beat, or you'll forever tap your feet. What do you
suppose that means?' For answer Steven cautiously stretched his hand
over the dance floor. A slow waltz started up. He pulled his hand
back. The music stopped.

'Strange,' said Dodo. She put her hand
over the floor and the same thing occurred. 'I can do it too,' she
said.

Steven shook his head anxiously. 'The
Doctor's game won't wait for us. We'll just have to take a chance.'
As he spoke, from behind through the passageway, Sergeant Rugg and
Mrs Wiggs emerged. Their clothes were now clean and beautifully fresh
and pressed. They walked a little stiffly, even proudly.