Read Doing My Own Thing Online
Authors: Nikki Carter
Doing My Own Thing (21 page)
31
W
hen I get home, my mom is dressed to go out. She's got on a tiny black mini dress and some heels, and her hair is in a pretty, feminine roller set. My mom is flyer than the average mom!
hen I get home, my mom is dressed to go out. She's got on a tiny black mini dress and some heels, and her hair is in a pretty, feminine roller set. My mom is flyer than the average mom!
“Where are you going?” I ask.
She laughs. “I don't have to tell you, do I?”
“No, but if you don't want me to have some of Big D's
associates
stalk you, then you better 'fess up!”
associates
stalk you, then you better 'fess up!”
“Girl, please. I'm going on a date. With my coworker, Jimmy.”
Oh! So Jimmy moved up from first-date to second-and third-date status. Okay then, Mr. Jimmy. I see you!
“Where are y'all going?” I ask.
“Nosy!”
I stand there with eyebrows raised, waiting for my answer! I'm not playing on this.
My mother laughs again. “If you must know, with your nosy behind, we're going to the Luckie Lounge.”
What? People that I know go to the Luckie Lounge. There are some folk there my mama's age, but there's a lot of young people too. I can't have any of my friends seeing my mama drop it like it's hot in the club! No way!
“Umm . . . I would appreciate it if y'all would select another venue. A more mature venue!”
“Sunday, you better go on somewhere with that! Jimmy's cousin is one of the bouncers there so we can get in for free. And they play my kind of music in there.”
“Yeah, they play a lot of old-school rappers like Biggie and Tupac.”
My mother tosses her head back and laughs hard, making her pretty curls shimmy like a waterfall. “Biggie and Tupac are not old school! Y'all kids are funny.”
I shrug. They're old school to me. I was a little kid when they were on the charts. I can't even say I remember any of their songs.
“Are you gonna start kicking it hard, now that I'm moving out and going to college?” I ask.
I cannot imagine my mom, who has always been a homebody, suddenly hitting the club circuit. I mean she's fly enough to fit in just fine, but I don't know if I want that. Especially with me becoming a celebrity and everything. I don't want any guys trying to hit on my mama, so they can get at my money! Or worse, people coming up to my mama in the club, and giving her demos of them singing and rapping. All bad!
“I'm going to kick it if I want to, Sunday. You, Dreya, and Charlie do exactly what you want to do, so I'm going to do me. Who's gonna check me, boo?”
OMG. She really needs to stop watching
Real Housewives of Atlanta.
For real. Wait! What if they ask my mom to be on that show? Her and Aunt Charlie's adventures are not ready for prime time. No thank you and no, ma'am.
Real Housewives of Atlanta.
For real. Wait! What if they ask my mom to be on that show? Her and Aunt Charlie's adventures are not ready for prime time. No thank you and no, ma'am.
I hand my mother a CD. “Well, this is what I wanted to show you before you go out kicking it!”
My mother takes the CD and turns it over in her hands. Tears spring to her eyes as she jumps up and down. “Oh my goodness! I mean, oh God's goodness! God is so good, Sunday. This is unbelievable!”
She wraps her arms around me and hugs me tight. I can barely breathe in her death grip, but it makes me feel happy nonetheless.
“When is the release date?” she asks.
“In seven days. The day after I go on
106 & Park
, to present my video.”
106 & Park
, to present my video.”
“Sunday, you don't know how much I prayed and prayed when Carlos lost your college-tuition money. I asked God to make up the difference for my mistakes. And He's answered my prayer more than I could've ever hoped for.”
“I know, Mom.”
“I want you to remember that when things get rough,” my mom says. “Because this is just the beginning, and it's gonna get rough. People are gonna be jealous of you, they're going to lie on you, and it's not always going to be fun.”
I nod with understanding. I've already experienced some of this, mostly at the hands of my own cousin. But I know, the closer I get to the top, the hotter it's going to get. I think I'm ready. I hope I'm ready.
“I know, Mommy. But you're going to be praying for me, right? So, I don't have to worry too much.”
My mother smiles and hugs me again. “Of course I'm going to pray for you, but you need to pray too. And keep people around you who you trust. Like Big D, Sam, and Mystique. They're all in your corner. I feel that about them.”
“Well, what about Dreya? Shouldn't I keep her close too? You've always told me that family comes first. You always have Auntie Charlie's back.”
The smile leaves my mother's face and she releases a long sigh. “I don't know what is going on with your cousin. She's not in a good place right now. As much as I tell you to have her back because she's family, I don't want you to get hurt in the process.”
“I just think that if it really comes down to it, Dreya wouldn't do me harm. I have to believe that or I don't know how I could deal with all the crazy stuff that she does. I mean, like she's the closest thing I have to a sister.”
“What I want you to do is pray for Dreya. I'm praying for her too, because as much as Truth has hurt her, I think she's still going to go back to him. I can tell that she's still not done with him.”
“Why would she go back to someone who choked her?” I ask. “That's just crazy.”
My mother says, “Yes, it is, but she refused to tell the police officer that it was him. And the only way she could get a restraining order is if she presses charges.”
“What makes her like that, Mom? Why is she holding on to him when he cheats and he's mean?”
“I don't know, but until she starts to value herself, there's nothing we can do about it.”
The doorbell rings, and my mother's smile returns. “That's my date! You see how he doesn't just honk the horn? He's got some sense unlike some other people I know.”
Those
other people
she's talking about are probably my dad and Carlos. I watch my mom get her pretty-girl swag on as she answers the door. Jimmy cheeses hard when he sees her, because like I said, my mother is fly!
other people
she's talking about are probably my dad and Carlos. I watch my mom get her pretty-girl swag on as she answers the door. Jimmy cheeses hard when he sees her, because like I said, my mother is fly!
“All right, Sunday. We'll celebrate your CD release in the morning with a pancake breakfast! Don't wait up for me.”
Don't wait up for her? Oh, I see she really thinks that she's grown! She better be glad that I trust her not to do anything stupid or else she'd be on lockdown, house arrest, and all of the above.
But for real, though! I'm so happy my mother is smiling. She might just get that husband she's been waiting for all my life!
And Dreya . . . wow to her and her toxic relationship. I'm going to just do me. Go to New York, get my
106 & Park
on, release my video, and strive to be number one. I just hope that when I make it, I can look to the right of me and my sister-cousin will be there by my side.
106 & Park
on, release my video, and strive to be number one. I just hope that when I make it, I can look to the right of me and my sister-cousin will be there by my side.
Without her raggedy boyfriend.
32
I
thought I was nervous the last time I was on
106 & Park
, but this time I'm dang near mortified. We're premiering both videos today on the show and the viewers are going to pick which one gets put into rotation. Mystique told me that no matter which video the fans choose, Epsilon Records has already selected video number one. It seems they liked the kiss too. Apparently, Mystique is the only one who had a problem with it.
thought I was nervous the last time I was on
106 & Park
, but this time I'm dang near mortified. We're premiering both videos today on the show and the viewers are going to pick which one gets put into rotation. Mystique told me that no matter which video the fans choose, Epsilon Records has already selected video number one. It seems they liked the kiss too. Apparently, Mystique is the only one who had a problem with it.
I'm backstage on the set and I hear the crowd going crazy. Then I start tripping because I realize that the screaming is for me! There's nobody here with me, it's me doing my own thingâSunday Tolliver, pop star.
Sam is with me, because, well, he lives in New York City now. Zac had offered his own crib to Sam while he was getting settled, but Sam insisted on getting his own spot. He didn't want to seem like one of Zac's entourage. I like that in him.
“You look good, Sunday,” Sam says as he runs a hand over my high ponytail.
“It's okay? I don't look too teenybopper?” I ask. I'm feeling some kind of way about this ponytail, and I can't say that it's a good feeling.
“Who do you hear out there screaming but a bunch of teens? It's okay if you look teenybopper, because that's what they are.”
“Rocsi's talking now! It's almost time for me to go on.”
On stage, Rocsi says, “Today we've got a special treat! We've got Mystical Sounds recording artist Sunday Tolliver here in the studio! She's going to introduce her brand-new video. Her album drops tomorrow, so make sure you go and cop that!”
On cue, one of the show's producers holds up a hand to me to let me know I've got three minutes.
“You'll do great out there, and then we can go out to lunch or something.”
“Really? Where are you taking me?”
“I was thinking about Sylvia's in Harlem. I'm in the mood for some soul food.”
“Listen to us, making lunch dates and stuff like grown folks.”
Sam laughs out loud. “We are grown aren't we?”
“I guess so. But I don't feel grown. I feel like my mama can come and bust all this up at any time and put my butt on punishment.”
“I know, right?” Sam says. “When I told my mother I was moving to New York, she
did
put me on punishment. Then she changed her mind when I told her I was going to be making close to six figures a year and a royalty percentage.”
did
put me on punishment. Then she changed her mind when I told her I was going to be making close to six figures a year and a royalty percentage.”
“That's really good coming out the gate, Sam. Most eighteen-year-olds aren't making that kind of money.”
“Well, most eighteen-year-olds don't have an investment broker either. I'm not playing games, Sunday. When we graduate college, I want us to have a life together.”
I give Sam my big wide-eyed blank stare. “After we graduate college? I can't even think past next week, let alone four years from now.”
“But I'm a planner, that's what I do. I just want you to know that I'm planning for us.”
I gulp and hope Sam doesn't hear me or see the fear in my eyes. Why would he lay this on me right before I go out on stage? We just got to solid boyfriend/girlfriend status and now Sam wants to skip to forever? He stays on fast-forward, but he wouldn't be Sam if he didn't.
When the producer gives me the signal to go onstage, Sam squeezes my hand. It feels like something a fiancé would do. I shudder at the thought of it, feel myself getting cold feet, cold toes, and every other frozen extremity.
I'm walking in a daze, and now Rocsi has a microphone in my face. “So Sunday, you shot the video for âCan U See Me' in Barbados? That's extra hot for a first video!”
“Yeah, it was incredible! We had so much fun.”
“And you didn't just film a video, you filmed a reality show too, right?”
I nod. “Yes, the first episode of it is tonight on BET at nine o'clock!”
“Tell us, is there going to be lots of drama?”
I laugh out loud. “Yes, my cousin is on the show.”
The crowd and Rocsi burst into laughter. “Your cousin does have an appropriate name, right?”
More laughter and cheers from the crowd. And someone yells, “I love you, Sunday!”
“I love you BACK!” I say in the microphone.
Rocsi laughs some more. “So there's something special going on with this video premiere, right? Tell the fans about it.”
“Well, we actually shot two videos and we want the fans to pick the one you like the best. That's the one going into rotation on BET.”
“I've seen them both, and they're hot! And isn't . . . isn't that the guy from the YouTube video playing your leading man? Is he your boyfriend?”
I smile. “Now, Rocsi, you know I don't talk about my personal life at all.”
“Mystique has taught you well, I see.”
“She is my mentor, you know.”
“Well, Sunday, go ahead and announce your video!”
I take the microphone from her hand and say, “First, I want to give a shout-out to one of my fans. Her name is Zoey and she was going through a breakup when she heard this song. Zoey, I hope everything is going well for you. Whether you have a new guy or not, you are still super fab in my book! I'm dedicating this video premiere to you. This is both versions of âCan U See Me'! I hope you enjoy it.”
Both videos play on the big screens, and the crowd goes wild. Seeing it larger than life is a heart-stopping moment for me! And I just want to disappear when everyone hoots as Sam kisses me on-screen. I hope they can't tell that I'm blushing, because all the evasiveness in the world won't be enough if I'm red as a firecracker when the lights go back up.
After the video plays, Rocsi says, “Right after the break, Sunday is gonna sing her single âInbox Me' live!”
Backstage I drink a warm bottled water and take a potty break before it's time for me to sing. Even though “Inbox Me” is not my favorite track off the album, I still plan to rock it all the way live.
When I hit the stage again, all nervousness and embarrassment about being kissed on-screen is gone and it's all about the performance. All about hitting the right notes, all about making it hot.
Because that's what I do. I make it hot!
I hear the intro play and I start singing, “
Inbox me/Don't want everyone to know-ow-ow/Inbox me/Get up on this dance floor/Inbox me/Don't leave it on my wall/Inbox me/You don't even have to call . . .”
Inbox me/Don't want everyone to know-ow-ow/Inbox me/Get up on this dance floor/Inbox me/Don't leave it on my wall/Inbox me/You don't even have to call . . .”
This is my first radio single, and although it didn't quite make it to number one on the chart, it did break the top five, which is fabulous for a newcomer like me! I told them that “Can U See Me” was a better single, but Epsilon chose to listen to Mystique instead.
We'll see who's right when “Can U See Me” hits number one on the Billboard charts. And I know it will! With the reality show and two hot videos to back it up, this song is going straight to the top.
And my career is going with it! Sunday Tolliverâchart topper! It has a great ring to it. No . . . it has a fab ring to it!
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