Doing The Apocalypse Shuffle: Southern Prepper Adventure Fiction of Survival Grid Down (Old Preppers Die Hard Book 2) (5 page)

BOOK: Doing The Apocalypse Shuffle: Southern Prepper Adventure Fiction of Survival Grid Down (Old Preppers Die Hard Book 2)
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“Of course we will, but we are not limited to just using that one kind of trigger or trap either. Now Buckshot also taught classes in survival trapping as well as he wrote a book and numerous articles on the web teaching modern methods of trapping so the preppers who found themselves in this kind of a situation had a means of understanding the shortfalls of primitive trapping and ensuring their success with modern methods like using aircraft cable steel snares and locks as well as body-hold Conibear killing traps and old fashioned footholds. Now, I was never one for a foothold trap, I don’t like those for my own personal and moral reasons but a Conibear body-hold killing trap that is quick and humane and I have a decent selection of those in my gear. Buckshot’s favorite survival trap is the 110 conibear, for example, for small animals and I have over a dozen of those. Speaking of which, that crazy smart old trapper taught me a trick on how to catch a fish with one that I got to try out just for the hell of it. In theory I can see it working but I never had the inclination or opportunity to think about doing it until now. I will do it just for entertainment versus practical purposes right now because I have probably a hundred easier ways to catch a fish but we will see.” Farley said.

 

“You got any of them aircraft cable snares you mentioned, Farley?” Jeremy said wide eyed at all the fun and possibilities he foresaw tromping the woods with Farley trying to catch game.

 

“Yea, I got maybe 4 dozen in various sizes but they don’t last like them steel conibears do. See, when an animal fights that cable it gets kinked up and twisted and becomes unusable rather quickly sometimes. You can salvage parts off damaged snares though and build new ones though. Now I will let you in on a little secret, snaring is my particularly most successful forte and trapping for us all is going to use up all the ones I have a lot quicker than I ever anticipated. My number one thing that I can do though to feed us regularly is the highly illegal but very effective practice of deer snaring. I got maybe a dozen snares for that specifically made and maybe a half dozen or so large animal snares I can convert or rig for that purpose so that is going to leave me light a whole lot quicker than I want to happen. With those things it’s all about my placement and not the quantity I set so I put out fewer so we will be ok awhile in that department.” Farley stated.

 

“You must be awful strong to be able to bend a tree down big enough lift a deer up into the air.” Becky said eying him differently thinking he was going to do some kind of Hollywood spring snare movie act by dangling a poor deer sky high from a tree.

 

“No, I don’t do it like that to catch them, I could I guess…. But I don’t... Dang girl you have been watching too many of them old Tarzan movies.” Farley said chuckling his outright NO to the Hollywood notion of its necessity but he was still alluding to the fact that he could perform the task of doing it if he really wanted too.

 

“No, Becky when you go to snare a deer there are several ways of doing it but none of them are the strangle and dangle methods that I use with bent saplings which is effective on small game. You see what I basically do to construct a deer snare is to arrange a noose in a position over a trail that I want to make the deer stick his head into. They are predictable enough creatures so I can accomplish that task in a few ways I learned from Buckshot as well as a guy’s book called the Rural Ranger I once read but he and that guy wouldn’t tell me specifically how to do it and made general allusions instead to using sticks to get the deer to duck his head. I guess he was scared he was giving away too many poaching notions or something. Anyway, it’s not as hard as you might think to get a deer to put his neck or foot in a noose if you know what you are doing. What you are trying to accomplish is either to make the animal choke itself out with a non-releasing snare lock or hold the animal in place with a releasing snare lock that lets up on the pressure once he quits fighting it or you can hook the thing to a drag to slow his ass down and wear him out so you can catch up and dispatch him after trailing it for a bit by walking.” Farley declared looking towards his audience for understanding.

 

“Why don’t you just let it “choke out” as you refer to it and be done with it as you so aptly said? It sounds awful cruel to me to just hold it in place or make it drag around a log or something before you come after it to kill it.” Becky said looking at Farley like he had just grown horns and a forked tail or something.

 

“Well, that’s a valid point to bring up but I would appreciate if you would quit looking at me with such distaste. I am not a violent man or a sport hunter, Becky. I am a skilled hunter for the table and a sort of prepper survivalist that can feed himself and others when needed. I take no pleasure in killing anything and indeed if you ever go on a hunt with me you will observe that I take a moment of silence to thank whatever animal that has given its’ life to sustain me and mine. I am not a cat that toys with its prey, ever. My methods sometimes might seem cruel in some ways but I take great care to avoid any unnecessary suffering or pain if I can help it. I do this for personal as well as practical reasons but first and foremost is my love of all life in general. Things are not always as cut and dried as they appear to be sometimes, Becky, and you will see and hear of many things that I might say or do that seem wrong just because the wisdom of it may not at first be apparent. For example, the question you asked about killing an animal by choking it out in less than a minute versus holding it or chasing it. It’s summertime right now and if I put a deer snare on the end of my trap line and killed an animal it might spoil in the heat before I got to it thus ruining the meat. I also don’t want it fighting the snare until I get there and having no access to water in its panic, so depending on the lay of the land I might allow it to pull a drag that will mark its trail well for me but wear the animal down while giving it some hope and comfort until I can take care of it. Dispatching animals is not something you have ever had to do for yourself in your modern grocery store world, Becky, so don’t judge me. Your world comes in prepackaged meat from the supermarket that you understand nothing of its processing practices or the horrors those animals go through to get on your dinner plate. Me? I take life and give life to us from now on in my own weird holistic ways, you might refer to as sometimes savage ways, but you will need to learn them before you judge me. And yes, I said you will need to learn how to trap and track also because now because that is a life skill just like balancing your checking account that must be dealt with and everyone needs to know how to perform to some extent. And I will tell you another thing; I am not going to be cleaning every animal or fish that I bring back to camp.” Farley declared.

 

“So I am going to be your squaw woman or something that you expect to work in the fields and quietly wait on Lord and master to come home from hunting and throw a couple rabbits on the ground in front of me and say clean these for dinner?” Becky said getting that crazy ire of hers up.

 

Farley eyed the sparks coming out of her green eyes and gave her the fire from his before trying to seek the middle ground and some calmness between them by stating that he only meant that we were all in this together now and we had to share the same survival skills whether or not we had a taste for them or not. He carefully explained that if perhaps someone got hurt that everyone must be familiar with the skills it took to live day to day and that was that. As for the squaw remark he told her in no uncertain terms he took umbrage with that analogy and that yes her normal duties would be tending the home cook fires but he expected nothing more from her than what she was comfortable doing at home to support him and Jeremy’s efforts out in the woods.

 

Farley then stated that he would be most likely the main provider of everything else in this tribal camp and if that included stealing he would do that too and if he someday didn’t come back because he got shot doing it, so be it, it was up to her and the rest to fend for themselves. Farley could be a bit blunt and long winded at times.

 

Becky looked at him long and hard as well as mad as hell for a moment before tearing up and apologizing to Farley for what she had not understood before. That Farley seemed to understand this new violent world they had got thrown into together by chance wasn’t his fault and she wouldn’t blame him for such anymore.

 

His seeming awareness of what to expect from himself or be expected from them in the gloomy predictable futures he predicted was beyond all strange but admirable in her eyes. Farley had been a gentleman to everyone’s circumstances and he had offered what at first she thought was a bounty of his preps with ulterior motives but she could now see the color of his soul and it was full of compassion and caring as well as a man-sized obligation that he had undertaken to help them all survive as best he could.

Farley’s day of getting fussed at was not over today by a long shot though as he spied an irate Miss Feng headed his way.

 

“Why you tell Charlie you not going to just stay here and no steal?” Miss Feng began before an “Oh shit” look came over Farley’s face and he began to stare angrily at everyone and in particular Charlie who was sort of looking cowed in back of his wife.

 

“You go home, Farley! You no good, you lie to me!” Miss Feng said running up on Farley and starting to try to push him away before her husband intervened.

 

“What the hell you talking about lady? I haven’t done anything..” Farley began before she resumed her tirade.

 

“Charlie say you say you going to go steal us some guns. I don’t want no stolen gun you hear me, Farley? You no welcome here no more and you take your woman and boy back home, far away!” Miss Feng challenged, confusing everyone present.

 

“What the hell is she talking about Charlie? We were fine earlier.” Farley said trying to figure out just what had riled the woman.

 

“I just told her I wasn’t going to hold you to not going scavenging and told you something about one of the officers deer camps not far from here.” Charley squeaked.

“Damn, you couldn’t have lasted at least a day longer before bringing that up.” Farley said disgustedly in Charlie’s direction.

 

“See, I told you! You were going to lie to me too!” Becky said looking an awful lot like Miss Feng at the moment and moving closer to her side as the men folk milled in confusion.

 

“Damn it man, you picked a hell of a time to get some shit started.” Farley groused at Charlie before shutting down the hub bub of accusations and snarls from the women in his direction with a loud ass “HEY’ trying to command their attention and say something more.

 

“You Promise, Farley, you say Promise! No stealing from nobody for three weeks you say!” Miss Feng shouted accusingly and feeling emboldened by Becky taking her side, took a threatening step in his direction to look like she might just get brave enough to slap him for his alleged misdeeds that he had got caught contemplating.

 

“Hold on now for one damn minute! I don’t know what anyone heard or thinks I am about to do but give me the benefit of the doubt for the moment. I ain`t done shit except being open and honest about what I was considering doing and let me tell you all something about that. I wouldn’t be considering doing a damn thing about anything but living my life if I didn’t have all of you alls safety and welfare to consider. I have offered you my food and my life to support you and I don’t take too kindly to being talked to like no errant schoolboy about what I may or may not do to keep us all alive. Why I could take this place and burn all these cabins down and you would be dead in place with nothing but this knife in my hand if I was as bad as you all are making me out to be. I want you safe, secure and independent and if that takes me going balls to the walls fighting for you or providing a so-called stolen gun for you, that’s what I am offering. What the hell are you offering me? You think about that! You want me to leave I will leave, but I tell you one thing, the way you ingrates are positioned now it’s nothing but Farley against the world and you hiding behind him. You dang sure are not making me confident you would patch me up if I try to stand for you. We got two guns, one asshole meaning me, that might even be willing to lend them to you and fight a bear tooth and nail against with nothing but my pocket knife for you but you got to work with me!.” Farley declared mad and disgusted he might end up risking his life for all of them trying to procure them some defense or food with not even a bit of respect about not trying to scold him as something less than inferior in their worlds or nothing more than a thief.

 

Miss Feng and Becky finally settled down but it was understood Farley was supposed to begrudgingly behave for three weeks and have this discussion again before going out robbing the neighborhood as they called it.

 

 

3

 

Moving Day

 

 

Farley got up the next morning and set about finding some sticks and twigs to fire up his Silver Fire rocket stove and fix himself and Becky some coffee. Charlie was supposed to come by at 7 am, have a quick cup of coffee with them and then see them off to go pick up Becky’s stuff at her old cabin on the other side of the lake. Farley grinned to himself that they had lucked into the mother lode when it came to coffee because the concession stand Charlie had taken over was well stocked with it as well as cream and sugars. Farley normally just drank his coffee black but figured he would start adding sugar and cream for the extra little bit of calories he could pick up. He normally didn’t have breakfast before the grid went down but now that he was getting up earlier and doing more he found himself wanting an early lunch or if he did decide he wanted breakfast on a particular day then it was skip lunch and have an early dinner later on. He was still trying to get used to this formula and getting hungrier all the time, mostly he figured it was having the extra time on his hands that made him think about eating so much.

 

Becky and he had talked about the meal situation and the need to stretch supplies and she pretty much went along with whatever he wanted to do. Farley always liked a big Sunday dinner in the middle of the day and Becky had been used to the same southern tradition so this day of rest and reflection would carry on and they would reserve the few special delicacies or meals Farley had in his preps for these occasions as long as they lasted.

 

Farley worried about how long his food storage would last but he was all in with the arrangements and considered it something that they would all have to overcome together as well as suffer together when that inevitable day came around when the preps run out.

 

Jeremy opened the door to his cabin and waved to Charlie before walking over carrying a small white garbage basket over to where Charlie was heating up a pot of water to make some instant coffee. At the top of Farley’s “To Find Someday List” was an old style stovetop percolator pot. The cabins they were staying in had electric pots with paper filters that could be used he guessed in a pinch by just pouring hot water over some coffee grounds but he longed for some real percolated coffee. Charlie had told him of the bounty he possessed in a couple of cases of canned commissary coffee and Farley planned on experimenting with it first chance he had when they got moved in here and settled more permanently.

 

“Morning, Farley. I got to go haul some water from the lake for the toilet; do you want to walk down there with me?” Jeremy asked.

 

“Yea, I will go down with you. Gimme a minute to mix me a cup of coffee and then we can take off. Your Mom up yet?” Farley asked.

 

“Yes, we been up a long time, you’re the one that slept in today. I noticed your light on late, what did you manage to find to do?” Jeremy asked.

 

“I was listening to the radio and working on my gear. Nothing new to report on the radio by the way. Hey, make yourself useful and go carry this cup of coffee to your mom for me please and tell her I am heading her way shortly. I will meet you over there in a minute but I got to go back to my cabin first and get me something to haul water in also.” Farley said fixing himself his own cup of coffee and then rising to proceed to his cabin.

 

When he started to return he saw Becky and Jeremy at the cook stove and Charlie and crew were coming down the road on the golf cart. He waved to them and then turned himself about and went back in the house again to grab a project he wanted some help with from the group before joining them.

“Hi folks, did everyone sleep well I hope?” Farley said greeting them.


“Just fine, how about you?” Charlie asked.

 

“That is one comfortable bed, Inn Keeper! Hey, either of you ladies sew very well? I got a project I hope you might be able to help me with.” Farley said holding up a leather belt.

 

“I got this sewing awl thing in my preps but I never used it before and this belt is too big on my skinny losing weight self. See, the way it’s made won’t allow me to punch me another notch so I can adjust it.” Farley said displaying the item.

“I have had to take mine up a few notches also, Farley. I guess we all have that same problem these days or our pants would be falling off. Give it to Fong, he is good at leather work.” Charlie said as his nephew came up to receive it and examine it.

“I never seen an automatic stitching awl like that before but I guess I can figure it out, it looks like it will do the job fine. You got waxed thread and everything for it, I see.” Fong said studying the automatic stitcher.

“Yea, speaking of loose clothes and belts needing notches and such, I have been wishing that I had my skinny jeans with me for weeks now.” Becky said gathering the loose fabric at her waist to demonstrate how much weight she had also lost since the grid went down.

 

“Me, too.” Miss Feng said which was worrisome because the lady was tiny and awfully thin already.

 

“Guess I will grow in to these shorts I got that are getting too big now.” Jeremy said causing everyone to pause and think about the two growing boys they had to feed and clothe.

Farley thought about how he had not gotten rid of any clothes that in good times he had to go to a larger size with because he knew there was possibly another day during disastrous times that he might need those same clothes to fit him again.

 

“I wonder if your feet lose weight also.” Fong said wiggling his toes in sneakers that had been purchased a half size bigger in hopes to somewhat keep up with his teenage growth rate before the disaster.

 

“Let’s not get all depressed talking about us getting all skinny and thin, I am going deer hunting in a day or two and we will have us a big barbecue and everyone can eat their fill.” Farley said as Fong offered to go fill Farley’s water bucket at the lake with Jeremy.

 

“Take the cart but don’t you boys be speeding or doing anything else foolish.” Charlie told the boys to their delight and they left with Fong driving.

 

“Those boys seem to be getting along great now, I guess they have forgotten all about their little scuffle.” Becky remarked referring to the no- holds-barred fight they had gotten into when they first met.

“Yes, them good boys. They be good friends now fight, no more” Feng said, shocking everyone that her opinion could change so quickly and so drastically about her thoughts about Jeremy who had bit her Fong in that memorable tussle.

“I will make all of you all some of my good healing, great for what ails you tea. I have some very good Shoumei white tea I will share with you for this auspicious day.” Farley said.

 

“What’s white tea?” Becky asked.

 

“Well, all green tea gets cured with formaldehyde often times.
White tea is made from immature tea leaves that are picked shortly before the buds have fully opened. The tea takes its name from the silver fuzz that still covers the buds, which turns white when the tea is dried. The exact proportion of buds to leaves varies depending on the variety of white tea. For example, White Peony contains one bud for every two leaves, while Silver Needles, is said to be the creme de la creme of white teas, it is made entirely from downy buds picked within a two day period in early Spring.” Farley said before continuing to explain why he was so enamored with this type of tea.

 

“Now it’s not the exotic appearance alone that explains white tea's sudden surge in popularity. The secret lies in what happens after the buds are plucked. Tea leaves that are destined to be sold as white tea undergo even less processing than green tea leaves. Instead of air-drying, the unwithered leaves are merely steamed. This results in a flavorful pale tea with a sweet, somewhat silky flavor. People who have tried both note that white tea lacks the "grassy" aftertaste that some people say is  associated with green tea. Furthermore, studies indicate that white tea is better for you. Leaving tea leaves so close to their natural state means that white tea contains more polyphenols, those are the powerful anti-oxidants that fight and kill cancer-causing cells, white tea contains more of these than any other type of tea.

 

That’s one good reason  to drink white tea but another is a 2004 study at Pace University which concluded that white tea can help your body's immune system fight off viruses and dangerous infection-causing bacteria. Recent studies at Pace University have shown that there is a major health benefit of white tea extract -- it can kill bacteria, viruses, and fungi in the body with more success than other teas.

 

The study focused primarily on the bacteria that cause Staphylococcus infections, Streptococcus infections, and pneumonia. The same study concluded that fluoride-rich white tea helps prevent the growth of dental plaque, the chief cause of tooth decay. Past studies have shown that green tea stimulates the immune system to fight disease." says Milton Schiffenbauer, Ph.D., a microbiologist and professor in the Department of Biology at Pace University's Dyson College of Arts & Sciences and primary author of the research. "Our research shows white tea extract can actually destroy in vitro the organisms that cause disease. Study after study with tea extract proves that it has many healing properties. This is not an old wives tale, it's a fact."

 

“Because white tea kills lots of bacteria on contact, I myself use it for toothaches, sore throats or anytime I get the cold or flu. I like it with honey and I have a whole bag full of those serving size ones you get at fast food restaurants like Church’s Chicken.” Farley said, getting some packets out of a brown paper bag.

 

“That’s like me collecting takeout packets of soy sauce, duck sauce, mustard, ketchup, etc. I have a bunch of those at my home in Ziplocs but I carried a lot with me also, they are back at the other cabin.” Becky said.

 

“I love hot Chinese mustard sometimes! Me and you are going to have to barter some on my return!” Farley said thinking that any kind of hot sauce, soy sauce, etc. was like gold now to change up the flavors of a bland diet or to apply to all that rice he had brought with him.

 

“Miss Feng, when we get back if you have any sauces or mustard you want to trade for I will make you a good deal.” Farley stated thinking just a little of something could make a meal more diverse or palatable.

 

“I may have something in my cupboards for you, Farley. What time you think you might be back here today?” Feng asked.

 

“Shouldn’t take us more than a couple hours max, we are not stopping anywhere.” Farley declared.

“Good, we will see you all for lunch then. Miss Feng says she is going to cook  us up some amazing dishes in her kitchen with what you brought in your preps along with what we got on hand of our own, it’s going to be a true feast. We wanted to have a nice welcoming celebration for you and yours and as sort of an apology for fussing at you so much last night.” Charlie declared.

 

“Hey I am in on that if we get back soon enough to fix something, I am going to make some hamburger baked beans that can be a side dish or a meal in them themselves, if that would be alright.” Becky declared and then explained her recipe.

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