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Authors: More Than Memory

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“Nelda,” he muttered savagely. His face pressed against her cheek, his lips trembling as he moved them down over her jaw.
“Don’t,” she whispered, her own lips quivering. Her fear intensified as his hand slid down her arms; she didn’t dare let him pull her close. “No, Lute, don’t.” Desperation was making her angry. “No, no, no!”
“Dammit!” The word exploded from him. He shoved her away and she looked into blazing eyes. “You’re blocking me out, because . . . I said we’re not suited, aren’t you? Well, I’ve changed my mind about that. We’re suited for one thing, that’s sure. And if you want me to marry you, then I’ll do it to keep you here where I can keep an eye on you.”
The sound of his voice, his words and his unbridled anger was destroying her.
“I . . . don’t want anything from you, now or ever. I don’t want to marry you. I want you to leave. Get out of my house and never come back.”
“That’s clear enough. I’m going. You’ve turned into a cold-blooded bitch!”
“It’s what you’ve thought all along, isn’t it?” Nelda asked quietly.
Lute closed the door firmly behind him, and moments later she heard his car driving down the lane.
This is the last time I’ll see him
, her mind screamed.
The very last time
. The tight rein she had kept on her emotions broke, her face crumbled, and she gave way to a storm of tears.

 

 

C
hapter
T
wenty-four
F
OR HOURS
N
ELDA LAY AWAKE
,
HAUNTED BY
Lute’s accusations. No matter how often she told herself she was doing the right thing in leaving, she kept thinking of what it would be like to be married to him again. She ached with yearning to be with him.
All day as she prepared to leave her home she thought of the words he had snarled at her.
If you want me to marry you, I’ll do it
. Nothing he’d ever said to her had hurt so much.
She flopped over on her back and looked at the clock. If she had swallowed her pride, he’d be with her now, and she wouldn’t have to feel cold and lonely.
Somehow the night passed. She rose from her bed feeling haggard and with her spirits at a new low. She looked out the window on a cold, still dawn.
Oh, Lute, I’m leaving, and I can never come back!
Nelda didn’t allow herself the luxury of self-pity for long. She dressed quickly, ate a piece of toast, and drank a glass of milk, thankful she was spared
morning sickness. In an hour she was ready to leave. With the new battery, her car started immediately and she backed it up to the back porch. Placing two suitcases flat in the trunk, she covered them with a sheet and, leaving her clothes on hangers, placed them in the trunk on the bed sheet. She piled boxes in the backseat of the car making it necessary for Kelly to ride up front with her.
Leaving the house was a traumatic experience. Boxes to be shipped were in the kitchen; the refrigerator was cleaned out, the shades drawn. Warmly dressed in wool slacks, a sweater, and a coat, Nelda looked around one last time.
“’Bye, Grandma. ’Bye, Grandpa,” she whispered before she went out the door and locked it.
She called Kelly, urged him into the car, and drove down the lane to the road without looking back.
On her way through town she stopped at the grocery store and bought a bag of treats for Kelly, a couple of bananas for herself and a newspaper.
ROCK’N ROLLERS, PILOT DIE IN TRAGIC PLANE CRASH
, read the headline on the
Clear Lake Mirror Reporter
. She tucked the paper in her carryall to look at later, thinking that the town would be talking about this for years to come.
At the Shell station she filled her car with gas and headed out of town. The drive to Minneapolis took about three hours. Nelda stopped a couple of times along the way to allow Kelly out of the car. The cold wind blasting from the north discouraged him from dallying.
In the city, she refilled the gas tank and asked directions to her new address.
The wind was whipping around the apartment building when she reached it. Nelda struggled against the powerful force on her way from the parking area to the door, leaving Kelly in the car barking his dismay at being left alone. She knocked on the manager’s door.
After making arrangements to have the maintenance man unload her car and bring her things to the apartment, she went back to the car for Kelly. With every bone in her body aching, by midafternoon all she had managed to do was hang her clothes in the closet. She lay on the couch, knowing that she should take Kelly out, but was too tired to do it.
When the phone rang, it was Marlene.
“I’m checking on you. Norris said you were coming up today.”
“I’ve been here a few hours.”
“You sound as if you have a cold.”
“Maybe a little one.”
“There’s a flu going around. If you have a fever, you probably should see a doctor.”
“If I do have a fever, would it hurt the baby?” To her embarrassment, there was a sob in her voice.
“Honey, I’ll be right over.”
“Don’t come, Marlene. If it’s flu, you could catch it. I’ll take an aspirin.”
“I’m on my way.” The phone went dead.
Several hours later she was tucked into bed. Marlene had taken her temperature and called the
doctor, who prescribed an antibiotic, which was delivered.
The sound of the doorbell brought Marlene to her feet. A quick smile tilted her lips.
“That’s Norris. I left word where I would be.”
A few minutes later they came into the bedroom, arm in arm.
“Hi, Chicken Little. That old flu bug got you down?” He dropped a kiss on her head. “I suspected you were on the verge of it the other night.”
“It’s good to see you. I don’t know how I was ever so fortunate as to meet you two.”
“Sheer luck.” Norris grinned and pulled Marlene close to him. “Isn’t that right, sweetheart?”
“If you say so, love. Now sit down and talk to Nelda while I get you a cup of coffee. Even your nose is cold.”
He placed a quick kiss near her ear.
The communication between them is so beautiful
, Nelda thought with a pang.
This is how love is supposed to be, not hurtful as it is between me and Lute.
“Is there a kennel near here, Norris?”
“Not close by that I know of. Let me talk to the manager and see if we can pay the cleaning man a buck or two to take Kelly out a couple times a day when you can’t.”
“I can do it most of the time. Today, I just couldn’t do it.”
“Leave him to me, honey.”
When Marlene and Norris were preparing to leave, Marlene made Nelda promise to stay in bed
and take the medication every four hours during the night.
“I’ll be back over in the morning.”
“You don’t need to, Marlene. You’ve done so much already.”
“I’ll be over in the morning,” Marlene insisted. “You’ve got to have a healthy baby. Norris and I have part interest in him, you know. My house is only about a mile away. It won’t take any time at all to get here.”
“There’s an instrument called the telephone right there by your bed,” Norris said as patiently as if he were talking to a child. “Use it if you need us tonight.”
• • •
During the days that followed, Marlene proved to be the mother-sister Nelda had never had. Her own mother had been a woman of strict self-discipline, who had loved her in her own way but had expected her to conform without question to what society expected of her.
Marlene, on the other hand, was warm, affectionate, and understanding, and Nelda thought it no wonder that Norris loved her so much. They had many interests in common. After Nelda recovered from the flu and Norris was away tending his various businesses, Marlene and Nelda spent hours together. They visited the Art Museum and the fabric and antique shops that were Marlene’s primary interest. She was looking for pieces to furnish Norris’s lakeside house.
Nelda had been in the apartment a couple of weeks when Norris arrived alone one night.
“I didn’t know you were in town.”
“I got here this morning.” He set a bottle of whiskey on the table, then took off his topcoat. “I need a drink tonight.”
“What’s wrong, Norris?”
“Marlene’s husband has taken a turn for the worse. They don’t think he’ll last out the night. I should be glad. She’ll be free to marry me. I feel bad for her and Jenny.”
“Are they with him?”
“Yes. It’s his time to be with his wife and daughter. I’ll keep my distance until Marlene is ready to think about us.”
“How long ago was he injured?”
“Almost ten years. I met Marlene eight years ago and fell for her like a ton of bricks. She held me off for a while because of Ralph. His brain injury left him with the mental capacity of a three- or four-year-old child. He was confined to a wheelchair and had no control over his bodily functions. Marlene was loyal to the bone and went out there every week and every holiday, played with him, took him out when the weather permitted.”
Once he started, Norris couldn’t seem to stop talking. He told her that at first Marlene’s daughter, Jenny, had resented him. Gradually he had won her over, knowing how important she was to Marlene. He missed being close to his own daughters and hoped someday they would see him as a father who
loved them and not merely as the man who sent the check every month.
After several stiff drinks, Norris put the bottle away. Nelda had never seen him so solemn.
“I was in Clear Lake today,” he said, changing the subject suddenly. “While I was at Hutchinson’s getting the key to your house, Earl told me that he wanted to get in touch with you. He’s got two people interested in the farm. One of them is Lute.”
“The other is probably my father. I don’t want him to have it.”
“Hutchinson said the other buyer has offered a lot more money.”
“That would be the major. I don’t care how much he offers, he’ll not get it because of the way he treated Grandpa and Grandma. He thought he was too good for them after he became a commissioned officer.”
“I took a storage-company truck out to the house to load up your things. Lute came over while I was there. I’ve never seen a man so angry. He would have torn my head off if the storage men hadn’t been there. There was no reasoning with him at first. He wouldn’t believe that you’re not coming back. Finally, he calmed down and left.”
“Did he say anything to you about buying the farm?”
“Not a word. I’m going back down there in the morning. Don’t you think I should give Hutchinson your phone number? You’re going to have to talk to him about your income tax if nothing else. It’ll be due pretty soon.”
“That’s right. I’d forgotten about it.”
A week passed before Nelda saw Marlene again. Her husband’s obituary was in the paper along with a picture. He had been an impressive-looking man and a successful stockbroker. Marlene called one day and asked if she would like to go to lunch. Of course she agreed, and they had an intimate conversation about life and love.
Marlene confided that her marriage had been a good one. She had married Ralph before she finished college. He had been older and already established in business. Her parents had been all for it, and she had been dazzled that an older successful man had wanted her. She knew that he loved her and she had thought that she loved him, but not in the way she loved Norris.
“There are different kinds of love between a man and a woman,” Marlene said with a sad smile. “The love I had for Ralph was at first a love rooted in respect and admiration. Then I loved him because he had saved my life at this terrible cost to him. Later, I loved him as a mother loves a child. With Norris it is so different. I love him as a woman loves her mate. He’s my lover, my friend. I’d crawl through hell on my knees to be with him.”
“He feels the same about you. I never knew a man who loved a woman so much.”

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