Drawn (27 page)

A groan escapes his thro
at as he closes his mouth over mine and shifts his weight, laying us on the bed as he kicks the pile of my clothes off and onto the floor.

I feel his erection, instantly hard against my thigh as we entwine our limbs, touching and kissing like this might be the one and only time we ever get the chance to be together. But it’s like th
is every time, and scares me – it’s more than I can handle.

“I need you Etta,” he whispers, his kisses raining down upon my jaw, flowing down my neck and over my breasts. He takes a nipple into his mouth, sucking back on it, grazing his teeth over the tight hard peaks. “I love you.”

“I don’t…” I start, struggling to find my words as my feelings take over my mind. “I’m scared of this. I’m scared of us. It’s too much. You make me feel too much,” I cry, squeezing my eyes shut as a tear escapes my right eye and slides over my skin in a bright trail of pure emotion.

Spreading my legs, he rolls his tip at my entrance, distributing my juices before he pushes in, causing me to gasp as he fills my insides
completely.

“I will do anything to protect you Etta, anything you want. Just don’t leave me. Stay. I love you. I love you,” he murmurs, sliding himself back and forth inside me.

“This can’t be love,” I gasp out, wrapping my legs around him, pulling him to me with my arms, kissing him against his shoulder. I want to absorb him, and carry him with me always. “I love you. But it’s something else. Something more.”

Turning his head, he kisses my neck, my jaw, my mouth, before taking his weight on his hands, looking down on me as he continues to thrust. “It’s everything,” he qualifies. 

I don’t go out with Kensi and Jessica on Friday night, and
Damien doesn’t go out to ‘work’ either. Instead we embark on a month of feeding off each other, shutting ourselves off from the world almost completely. We spend almost every waking moment together. Ignoring everything and everyone.

But eventually, we need to come up for air.
We’ve each missed so much uni that it’s likely we’re going to have to redo this semester, and I haven’t seen my parents since I moved out of home.

Now, they’
re demanding that I go and see them, even going so far as to guilt me into it by using my brother’s death against me.

“We already lost Craig, Etta. Don’t distance yourself so much that we lose you too.”

It’s not that I’ve been staying away from them to hurt them, I’ve just been so caught up in Damien. When it’s just the two of us, everything is perfect. Everything is right.

“You could probably come inside for dinner too if you’d like?” I suggest to
Damien as he drops me off at my parent’s house.

“As much as I would love to
, I’ve organised a meeting with a possible new commission for tonight. I need to go and see them,” he explains.

My stomach sours
, as the memory of Bec and her ‘portrait’ session flashes through my mind. “Do you have to do them?” I plead.

“
Babe, this woman has been emailing me for ages, and I’ve been fobbing her off to be with you. But I’m running out of money. I need to do something.”

“I don’t like it. I don’t want you with someone else. I don’t trust any of them around you. Find another job – anything.”

“And have to work so much to earn the same amount of money that we never get to see each other? Is that what you want?”

“Well… no, I don’t bu–” I start before he cuts me off.

“Then trust me. Ok,” he says, reaching over to me and brushing my hair away from my face.

I fight the urge to close my eyes and lean into his hand as it touches my skin. He knows that once he touches me I have trouble thinking straight. But this is important, and I force my mind to stay sane.

“I want to meet her.”

“Excuse me?” he asks, confused.

“The woman. I want to meet her before you start working with her. And while you’re working, I will be sitting in your apartment, listening through the door of the fucking room you’re so secretive about, and if I hear one hint of a moan, I will go so crazy that what happened with Bec will seem like watching kittens at play. You feel me?” I state, my eyes wide and serious as he watches me, calmly listening.

“It’s the portraits or the fights. And fighting can get me thrown in gaol
, so what will it be?”

I sit there, my eyes locked with his as he challenges me, knowing that I’d rather he did neither.

“You choose Henrietta. I can call her and cancel then call the guys to go and hustle a fight. Or I can meet her and maybe get enough money to keep us going for another month.”

I bite my lip as I try to decide. “Take the meeting,” I tell him, my voice flat as I move to get out of the car, annoyed that he sprung this on me now.

“Hey,” he says, reaching out to grab my arm and pull me back toward him. He takes a hold of my face, and presses his lips to mine, kissing me tenderly, feeding me the life I need from him. “Don’t leave me angry. Just love me. Trust me.”

“I do love you, and it’s them I don’t trust. If they feel even a grain of sand’s worth of my
attraction toward you, they’ll be all over you.”

“I’ll keep it professional. Call me when you’re done, ok?” he says, kissing me lightly as I agree and
head toward the front door where my father is already waiting for me.

He nods toward
Damien as we both watch him drive off. “Is everything alright? Why isn’t he coming inside too? I’d like to talk to him.”

As I open my mouth to respond, my mother pushes in front of him and wraps her arms around me. “Etta! Finally. I’ve missed you so much.
Ignore your father. He’s just upset that he hasn’t seen you properly for over a month.”

I hug her back, feeling odd
being back here again. It’s strange. It was my home for so many years, but it doesn’t feel that way. My eyes drift back over my shoulder, to the space where I just saw Damien, missing him already.

“Come in, your Dad’s been cooking his special roast potatoes
. He might not seem it right now, but he’s been looking forward to having you visit.”

My father leads the way toward the kitchen and dining area where everything is set and ready.

“So why did Damien leave without coming in?” he asks again.

“Barry,”
my mother admonishes.

“What? He’s been monopolising our daughter’s time for weeks now. So we never see her. I want to know why he can’t spare a few moments to come in and say hi.”

Before my mother can respond, I say, “He’s got a business meeting to go to.”

“A business meeting?
What kind of business is he doing? I thought he was a university student, just like you,” my father says, placing his hands on his hips as he looks to me for information.

“I don’t know exactly,” I lie, avoiding eye contact as I move to sit at the table across from my mother.

“How do you not know?” My father asks, as he collects a tray laden with food, and walks it over to the table, setting it between us all.

“Can I get anybody a drink?” my mother says, trying to steer the conversation elsewhere.

“Because it’s none of my business,” I state, staring at my father defiantly.

“I thought it might be nice to have a glass of red with the lamb,” my mother con
tinues, ignoring my father and me. “How are your classes Etta? Have you decided on what you’re doing for your research assignment yet?”

“We
ll, you should make it your business,” my father continues. “You spend enough bloody time with him. You should know every freaking thing about him.”

My mother lifts the bottle of wine and p
ours each of us a glass. Her cheeks starting to flame red as she becomes flustered by our refusal to change the subject.

“Is this why you wanted me here? To question me about
Damien? It would be nice if you could spend some time being interested in me for a change, and just me. Not my relationship. Not my training schedule or my grades. Just me. It might help if you actually took the time to try and find out who I am as a person. Then I might want to come around a little more often. I moved out for a reason dad. You don’t get to start demanding information from me the moment I walk in the door – especially when you’re the one who insisted that I come here.”

Glancing down at my wrist, I see the Ki bracelet he gave me for my birthday. I’ve worn it every
day without fail because I felt it was such a touching gesture. But suddenly, I don’t want it anymore. I undo the clasp and push away from the table, dropping the bracelet on the table.

“You know what? I’m not hungry anymore.”

“Etta!” my mother calls as I head for the door.

“I’m sorry mum. I just didn’t come here to be brow beaten over
Damien.”

I pick up my bag and pull the door open, heading toward the train station on foot so I can go home.

“Etta,” my mother calls, just as I step over the property line. “I’ll give you a lift.”

Stopping, I look back at my mother as she aims the electronic key at her Barina and presses the doors open. I press my lips together and walk over to the passenger door and get inside.

“I’m sorry mum,” I say, as she reverses out of the driveway.

“So am I Etta. Honestly, I’m disappointed in both of you. You certainly aren’t the innocent party here. You’ve barely called, you’ve cancelled dinners. And whenever we’ve stopped by your place, your housemates tell us that you’re out with your boyfriend.
I’ve had a hard enough job stopping your father from storming down to the gym every morning to give you a piece of his mind. What you’ve done. It isn’t fair. You’ve gone and moved out and practically removed yourself from our lives as well. Don’t you think we’ve lost enough? Don’t you think we deserve better than a cursory text or phone call to let us know you’re alive?”

“Yes. You do. I’m sorry mum. I’ll try and be better to you.”

“Don’t try Etta. Do.”

Before I know it, we’ve pulled up outside the townhouse, and she’s reaching into her pocket for something. “Here,” she says, handing me back the Ki
bracelet. “Put it back on, and tomorrow, I want you to call your father and smooth things over.”

“But mum,” I start to argue, taking the black cord from her hands.

“Just do it. I’m not interested in being caught in the middle of you too. I can only handle one strong headed person at a time.”

I look down at the bracelet in my hands and roll the cord between my fingers. “Ok, I’ll talk to him.”

“Thank you, and Etta, I want to see you properly too. I miss you. I know you’re young and you’re caught up in the glow of a new relationship, but you need to remember your family and friends.”

Leaning toward me, she holds her arms out for an embrace.
I of course, lean in and wrap my arms around her small frame.

“Thank you mum.
I’m sorry dinner didn’t work out.”

“It’s ok. Although I wish you could have stayed, you look like you could use a good meal. Are you not eating properly?” she cups my chin in her hand and studies my face. “You look tired too. Too many night clubs huh?”

“Something like that,” I smile, dropping my eyes from hers. I can’t really explain the truth. How do you say to your mother that you’ve been so busy being ravished that you have begun forgoing food and sleep, just to stay in his arms.

“It might be a good idea to ask
Damien to check in with your father too. He hasn’t been attending the usual training sessions and your father is starting to develop conspiracy theories.”

“Ok,” I laugh, shaking my head slightly. “I’ll see what I can do.” I bid my mother farewell and climb out of the car, heading to the front door of the townhouse while I dig around in my bag for my key.

Just as my hand clasps around the smooth metal of the keychain, the front door bursts open. “Etta! You’re here,” Jessica exclaims overly enthusiastically, blocking my way slightly.

“Well, I do pay rent for my room,” I say, trying to move past her.

“Yes. Yes you do.” Something about the way she’s talking and moving beside me, makes me think that she’s trying to herd me up the staircase instead of letting me through to the lounge room.

“What’s going on?” I ask slowly, narrowing my eyes at her as I sidestep her and head to the living area. “Oh. I see.”

Sitting on one of the couches are Kensi and Jeremy, she’s half draped over him in propriety, so I know that she obviously landed her prize. On the other couch is Aaron.

“Hey Etta. How are you?” he asks kindly.

“I’m not dating him,” Jessica says behind me, quickly and quietly. “You know – girl code and all that…”

“What?” I ask, not fully understanding what she said at first. “Oh! Girl code. Ok, I get it. It’s cool. You can all hang out with or date whomever you choose.”

“I’ll um… leave you all to it.” I nod, backing away from everybody before heading up to my room, where I can call Damien in private and grab a few things to take back with me.